Joan Betty Connor

August 3, 1933 — December 26, 2019

Joan Connor, a remarkable soul who lived a seemingly quiet and uneventful life, passed away December 26th at her home in Spokane after a decades-long battle with severe arthritis and a shorter battle with dementia. She was 86. She is survived by her six children, eight grandchildren, and five great-grandchildren.

Born Joan (pronounced Jo-ann) Betty Hartman in 1933, she was the daughter of Pasco civic leader Gilbert Hartman and his wife Lois who raised Joan and three other children at a home near the Columbia River in east Pasco. Like her father and her brothers, she was passionate about sports and renowned for her foot speed, agility, and throwing ability. Asked late in life if it was really true she had been able to throw a baseball from centerfield to home plate, she seemed surprised by the question, and softly replied, “of course.”

After graduating from Pasco High School, Joan attended Washington State College where she led an intramural basketball team (the “Hartman Heartbreakers) and became a WSC cheerleader. It was there she met Donald Connor, an accomplished swimmer who was attending WSC on an athletic scholarship. The two were married in Pasco in August of 1954, shortly before Don entered military service as a young lieutenant and was dispatched to Korea.

The tragedy of Joan’s early life was her diagnosis with severe arthritis shortly after she and Don were married. She quickly lost the ability to bend either of her knees, a condition that neither medication nor surgery could reverse. She carried on as if the disease had not crippled her. She side-saddled her way over curbs and up long flights of stairs, used her remarkable coordination to dismount chairs and sofas with grace, all the while refusing to complain about her limitations or the pain she had to endure. She swam, played croquet, loved to bowl, and even played one nine-hole round of golf.

She moved with her husband and three children to Panama in 1958 where Don worked for a quarter century as a coach and teacher for the Panama Canal Government. Joan was a full-time mother who gave birth to three more children in Panama. The couple returned to Washington in 1984 after Don’s early retirement. They bought a home near Lincoln Park in Spokane and became parishioners at nearby Sacred Heart Parish. In 1985 and 1986 she was a volunteer at the Hanford Education Action League. Along the way, she became a devoted Gonzaga basketball and Seattle Mariners fan, and for years kept a life-sized cardboard image of Ken Griffey, Jr. in the hallway next to her kitchen.

The daily miracle of Joan’s life was her sparkling selflessness and fearless compassion. Her love of life was rooted in her Christian faith and the unwavering joy with which she engaged life around her. She inspired nearly everyone who came in contact with her, including the physical therapists who worked with her in 2010 and 2013 after falls that resulted in broken hips. One morning she noticed a physical therapist was on the verge of tears as he watched her grimacing to hold her balance on a newly replaced hip. “I’m sorry,” she said as she stopped to look over at him. “Are you okay?”

She loved to sing as much as she loved to laugh. Even as dementia erased her memories and left her confused about where she was, she maintained a sharp and playful sense of humor.

With the assistance of her children and loyal caregivers, Joan continued to live at home after Don died of a heart attack in December of 2016. She is survived by her three siblings, brothers Terry and Barrie, and sister Polly; four daughters, Nancy, Debby, Betsy and Jean; her sons, Tim and Tom; eight grandchildren, and five great-granchildren.

The family requests donations in her memory to Sacred Heart Parish and Catholic Charities.