Raymond Grant Mahar

Ray Mahar, born Koopmans, passed away peacefully in Parksville, BC, on June 28, 2025, at the age of 81. Born in Amsterdam, Holland, Ray immigrated to Cumberland, BC, with his family at the age of 13, carrying with him a quiet determination that would shape the rest of his life.

A graduate of Courtenay Secondary in 1963, Ray went on to wear many hats in life: accountant, crisis counsellor, apartment manager, and activation therapist. But more than the roles he held, it was the compassion, humour, and resilience he brought to every interaction that people remember most. He spent much of his career supporting those living with mental health challenges, working closely alongside his beloved husband, Grant, to build programs rooted in dignity and human connection.

Ray was a trailblazer in LGBTQ2S+ advocacy, dedicating much of his life to fighting for equal rights, including access to pensions and medical benefits for same-sex couples. In a moment of both personal and public triumph, he and Grant became the first gay male couple to marry on Vancouver Island, a milestone that brought him immense pride and joy.

Over the years, Ray called many places home - Cumberland, Vancouver, Smithers, Victoria, and finally Parksville. In each of these communities, he left behind a legacy of kindness, candour, and courage. Whether offering a listening ear at a crisis centre, managing a building with empathy, or simply sharing a good laugh, Ray made life a little brighter for those around him.

Ray is predeceased by his husband, Grant; his parents, Ron Koopmans and Cher Van Zanner; and his brothers Hans and Rudy. He is survived by his brother Ron; his foster son, Scott McGougan; grandson, Caleb McGougan; his close friend and sister-in-law, Sandra Koopmans; and many nieces and nephews who will remember him with love and gratitude.

In honouring Ray, we celebrate a man who lived authentically, loved deeply, and stood firmly for what he believed in. His fierce spirit and gentle heart will not be forgotten.