Oh pat I still miss you so much love joanie❤️🌻🌺🌷

Over the years we lost contact with one another but that doesn't mean I have ever forgot the kindness you and Pat showed me. Those wonderful times will live forever. I am so sorry for your loss and my deepest sympathies from Judy and I.

Dear Ken, 
I just found out about Pat’s passing and I’m so very sorry. I will always remember Pat as a wise and witty lady,  great hostess and entertainer, but most of all, as a dear friend. We experienced many fun adventures together, but also some not so great. She was always there, with a smile on her face and a twinkle in her eyes, ready to lend a listening ear, offer to help or just simply tell you a story that would bring a chuckle.  Her personality was infectious, you couldn’t help be happy around her.  My family also has many great memories of time spent  with you and Pat.  I will always cherish our friendship and she will live in my memories.  
María Giese 

Dear Ken,
David and I are so sorry to hear about Pat's death.  Pat's joy and sense of fun was infectious, and it makes me smile just to think about her.  Pat was a welcoming hostess, an expert storyteller and comic, and an encouraging, loving friend. I learned so much from her. We cherish our memories of tailgating at LSU games, visiting at your Baton Rouge home, and later visits in Chicago and Long Beach. 
May light perpetual shine upon her.
Sending love to you,
Andrea and David McKey 

Ken:
Bonnie and I just saw the obituary, and were deeply saddened to hear of Pat's passing. The two of us have many fond memories of visits from you and Pat--in North Bay, Thunder Bay and Sudbury. She was always so beautiful and gracious and kind. So much fun to be around, and not at all hesitant when it came to being mischievous. I couldn't have imagined a better partner for you. 

Kenny, you and I have bagged enough memories for a couple of lifetimes. Many of them raucous and all of them good. You've been a friend, a companion, and a gentle mentor. Please know that my heart is with yours in this time of sadness. 
ric
 
    
  

I'm sorry it took me so long to realize that we have lost our inimitable Pat.  We had lost touch for the last couple of years, but she did visit me here in Mendocino and I had visited her in Long Beach.  
We met in Social Work School in Illinois, and I think what we had in common was that we were  too silly to be social workers.  And we were older and had had many adventures and several marriages between us.  So it was hard to be earnest and believe everything our teachers said, though at the same time we were compassionate and became good social workers .
I can't imagine a world without Pat.  She was so in touch with her inner wild child and always wanted to play. 
 For some reason my most vivid memory is having an intoxicated lunch at Ventana in Big Sur.  Although somewhat elderly,  we  were so rowdy that people asked to have their tables moved away from us.  It started when we were looking at a $20 bill and trying to decide whether Andrew Jackson was cute . Talk about silly.
 I send my love and support to all who adored and appreciated her, especially dear patient Ken.  Party on in her name.

I've read all the condolences and agree with them all.  She was my best friend in high school and afterward as well.  Pat was everyone's best friend, loving and kind and the funniest friend I ever had.  She continues to be the best and most loving friend ever. My sympathy to Glenda and Priscilla and of course Ken.  She will always be my best friend.  ...............  Connie

Pat was like a sister to me, I loved her dearly and will always miss her.

In loving memory and as a tribute to Patricia Millar - my dear loving friend, my pal, my sister and other words of endearment.  Our initial introduction in 2018 was filled with laughter, jokes, humor and a bond that continued until the calling of the Angels May 1, 2020.  Patricia’s insatiable zest for life - the good, the bad and the unreal –was infectious and welcomed by all.  No matter whose life Patricia touched along the way, her intentions were genuine and from the heart.  Patricia’s presence will be sorely missed by all who enjoyed the pleasure of her company and her love while on earth. Love to Ken, Andy and Patricia’s family and friends.  Karen Peterson

Ken and family
I met dear Pat shortly after meeting you, the new Dean of the LSU Graduate School of Social Work. As a long distance runner and member of your Advisory Board, we soon transitioned  to friends in running along with many in Club South Runners, the local running club. Pat was quick to welcome us joggers into her home and world, entertaining us with her smile, hospitality and incredible sense of humor. Pat’s love of people and salty language fit right in with the boys of Club South Runners and we loved it and her.  Ken. I’m so glad Bar and I had time to visit with you and Pat just two months ago. Always lovely, always, sweet, and her sense of humor was fully intact deep within her core. Memory loss could not take any of her best attributes away. It was wonderful seeing the two of you caring for one another right up to her goodbye.  Thanks to you and Pat for being an important memory in my life. Be well, take career,live and love on.

Dear Ken:
Pat was a very special lady, whom I have so many fond memories of. Whether it was hosting the Wednesday night group, the great tailgate parties, or just being around her was always so much fun. She was at the same time, such a gracious, refined hostess and could dish out the saltiest joke with the best of them. I hope that you can know some comfort knowing that she is in a beautiful place, fully at peace.  I am also happy for you that yall got to spend so many great years together. 
Sincerely
Carl Jeansonne

I only met Pat once and it was towards the end of her life, but what an experience it was! I loved her immediately. I especially loved what her beloved Ken described as her "salty" sense of humor. Pat was in a circle in their Burbank home along with other people in the memory unit. They were learning a song in advance of a field trip that afternoon. Pat wasn't going to be able to go because the bus was over-booked so Ken was worried that she would be disappointed. He was enough worried that he spoke up and got her on the bus after all. If I hadn't seen already how much he loved Pat, I knew then that he had been her advocate all along, never letting her down for one moment. 

Dear Pat. I hadn't laughed so hard in a long time. Brent and I were driving from Los Angeles to Oregon, so our visit was brief, but every time I've thought of you since, I've smiled or chuckled or out and out laughed. What a light you were in this world! What a light you will continue to be. Love from down here. We'll keep an eye on Ken, so don't worry. 

Love, 
Bar Scott, your friend with not-as-salty a sense of humor, but close. Thank you for being so unabashedly joyful.  

Pat was a dear friend of my mother's.  I had the opportunity to go out to lunch once with her many years ago and was struck by her intelligence, insight, and humor.  She was filled with energy and life.  My mom treasured her relationship with Pat and I am so sorry she suffered these last years.  She was an amazing woman!


I would like to extend my deepest condolences to those who loved Pat so much.  I remember her electric wit that kept us all wanting more.  May her gifts to us continue as we remember those times she had us laughing and happy.  May you find peace. May you find strength.

Pat was the best friend I ever had. She was the smartest, funniest person I knew. I loved being with her -- she always made me laugh. I will never be the same without her.

I met Pat around 2010 through her husband, Ken.  Ken and I were members of the same curling club and Pat would accompany Ken to his games, dressed in a full length fur coat, which was pretty amusing to me.  Over the years I grew to know Pat better, including traveling to curling events with her in different places.  It was during the trips where I discovered her incredible wit and sense of humor.  There were so many times where she would have us laughing so hard we had tears in our eyes.   One exchange she had with our friend trying to put his seat belt on is something I will remember for the rest of my life.  Pat had what some would consider a vocabulary that contained some "off color" words, but she wielded those words with the precision of a surgeon, knowing exactly when to drop them to make you laugh.   Pat always looked for opportunities to find enjoyment, and always wanted to share those fun adventures with others.
The world is darker now, and our hearts ache for losing Pat.  The love she shared with Ken was truly something special, and something we all could easily see.  Through her laughter, her kindness, and her energy, our lives have been touched, and I will forever cherish my memories of her.


I really enjoyed knowing Patricia; she was light-hearted but was also serious about other people’s needs. She helped develop a rehabilitation program for homeless veterans. Each veteran she helped to rehabilitate may have lived for decades longer than he /she would have without rehabilitation and with a quality of life astronomically better ! She moved to different localities to help Ken advance his career. All of this shows her unique combination of dare and care. We will remember her and wish she were still here teaching us how to live a full life
      Mark

I must have been around 6…maybe 7 when I first met Pat. She made it easy to adjust to a reality in which I had a ‘stepmother’ - as a kid I just took that for granted but looking back, she did a bang up job. Our visits to ‘dad and Pat’s’ - whether up here in Canada, in Arkansas, Illinois, Louisiana, Florida, or California - were always full of laughter and fun, in no small part due to Pat. 

Some of my fondest memories of those trips involved shopping runs with my stepmother - I’d always volunteer to go with her, and she never failed to make it a hilarious outing - talking to (or playfully making fun of) pretty well everyone we’d see. As a kid I found it equal parts embarrassing and fantastic and I think back on it often. Pat was truly one of the funniest people I’ve had the pleasure of knowing.

As I grew older, it became clear to me just how special Pat was to many people - and in particular to my dad Ken. She’ll be dearly missed.

I loved my Aunt Patti just about as much as a person can love another person. She was my favorite. When she came to town it was as if a festival was happening, the festival of Pat. She was one of the funniest people I've ever known, and had she had the mind to, she could have definitely made it as a professional comedian. She taught me the value of fun, and I have let it guide me throughout my whole life.  She prioritized fun, made it mandatory, which is why she was so magical. She inspired you to live a better life.
Just a few months ago she told me, "Let's never grow up! Wouldn't that be a shame?" I will miss her deeply, and feel privileged to have known her, to have gotten to be loved by her.

Dear Ken
Pat was an original in every sense of the word. Each of her many friends must have a Pat story. Our favorite is the time you both were at a national meeting of Social Work Deans. Coincidentally, Pat bought new luggage while you were meeting with many Deans of Social Work in a public meeting at the hotel. Pat proceeded to carry the old empty luggage down to discard. On the way, she walked through the meeting and announced for all to hear: “That’s it! I’ve finally had enough! I’m leaving you!” Understandably your peers were in shock. All you could do was mutter: “She doesn’t mean it.”
You always were her perfect Straight Man.
Love
Louis and Paul

There is so much I could say about my Dear Sister Pat but I’m not a good writer.  She was by far the most important person in my life.  Pat was there for me since the day I was born.  Even though  we lived far apart, most of our lives we talked to each other by phone almost every day, we had no secrets and were not just sisters but best friends.  She had a wonderful ability to always make everyone happy no matter what they were going through that day.  She made friends  with everyone she met.  When I would go shopping with her it would take hours because she knew every clerk in every store and would have to visit with them.  Everyone loved her.  I’m so grateful to have her for a sister and have so many memories to keep me from feeling the sadness of loosing her presence.  I’m also thankful she had her husband Ken by her side until the end so she always felt love.

I remember when I was in elementary school I would have sleepovers at my Grandma Glendas apartment when Aunt Pat was staying there in town. We would share the guest bedroom bed and at night she would ask me if I wanted to hear a bedtime story. Of course I would want to hear one because who wouldn’t want Aunt Pat to tell a bedtime story? She would tell me some story making fun of my grandma when they were little girls or a made up story, but as always, she would add humor to it. Honestly, her stories only made me wake up from laughing so hard with her, it would be very hard to fall asleep when she was next to me cracking up. Every time she was in town I would look forward to all her stories and her jokes. She was the funniest person I knew, and never failed to make anyone laugh. 
I miss you so much Aunt Pat. Keep everyone in heaven laughing. 

There are so many memories of my Aunt Pat that I do not know where to begin.  She was a kind and loving person who brightened the room when she entered.  She always had a joke to tell.  And man could she cook, her Chinese food was my favorite.  But she also made Good ole cake, butter cake and other things that are supposed to cut short your life but are too good not to devour.  I loved my trips to Little Rock to see my aunt.  And when I joined the Navy I was fortunate enough to be stationed in Pensacola, just a short drive to Baton Rouge.  I spent many a weekend at Aunt Pat and Uncle Ken's in Baton Rouge.  When I became a father, Aunt Pat loved to see her niece and nephew, she would tease them by saying "Peas Please" and the kids for some reason thought that was hilarious.  I will miss her.

There was also the time that Pat returned home from work and Viola was missing. She was unable to find her and enlisted me to help. I arrived and we both searched the house. No Viola! Just as Pat and I were about to decide on another course of action, the flower arrangement on the dining room table began to vibrate. What the heck (or F**k as Pat would say)?!? As Pat and I slowly approached the flowers, up popped Viola’s head! How she got into that arrangement I’ll never know.

I have many many more stories of Pat. I smile to myself whenever I think of her. Pat was wonderful woman and a precious friend. I will certainly miss her!

One night, Ken was out of town. Luigi and I and Pat went to an event downtown. For some reason Pat wanted to drive herself and planned to meet us. This was at the time that Clinton was running for President and Little Rock was crawling with security. Returning home, we were stopped at a road block not far from our house and told by the authorities that the hotel in which most of the Secret Service was staying had experienced an armed robbery. Two of the robbers had been apprehended but at least one had gotten away on foot. They advised us to be careful and notify them if we saw anything suspicious. We returned home and started preparing to go to bed. Suddenly, the doorbell started ringing and ringing and ringing! We crept to the door and there stood Pat with Viola the cat on one arm and her overnight bag on the other arm. She was crying hysterically, mascara running down her face saying “there are desperados with guns loose in these woods and I’m staying here tonight!” We all had a good laugh later.
One year, Pat invited us to her home in Louisiana for Thanksgiving. TURDUCKEN was the main feature on the menu. Another friend of the Millar’s also joined us. After many pre-dinner toasts, we were definitely not feeling hungry for dinner. Pat disappeared, and the other friend decided she needed to take a nap, so Ken and Luigi drove her home. Pat reappeared after they had been gone for about an hour. We waited and waited and waited. Finally, the guys returned, having gotten lost and driving around the countryside trying to find their way home! Luigi initially had no idea Ken was lost since Luigi was only visiting himself. He figured it out when Ken finally pulled over, stopped,  and asked him how to get back to the house. Needless to say we all got a good laugh when they got back. I have no idea what happened to the meal. We all went to bed. I really had wanted to try the Turducken!


Miss Pat was a “one of a kind friend”. She was one of those people who was “larger than life”, funny as hell, and a kind and thoughtful friend. She loved her husband Ken dearly and her cat Viola, named for her Aunt Viola was very special to her. It was difficult to keep up with all of Ken and Pat’s many moves, but Pat never failed to call at least one a year for a “chat” for many of the years.
I have so many “Pat” stories! I hardly know where to begin. My husband and I live in our current home due to Pat and Ken. When the Millar’s moved to Saint Michael Drive in Little Rock, we were invited to see their new home. We loved the house and we loved the area and soon found a home in the next block, built by the same builder, Steve Deere. We loved living near Pat and Ken and we got to see them frequently. We also got to keep Viola while Pat and Ken were away. Those stories are for another time...
Parties at the Millar’s were fun and frequent. Pat was the “hostess with the mostest” and you knew you had made it in life when you received a much sought after invitation to a Pat Party! Pat was so fun and funny, we ended up laughing the entire time. There was awesome food and awesome company at every party! I particularly remember a fish fry, the time we met her nephew, Andy (I was so star struck that I forgot to get his autograph!), and the time we met the new (and as it turns out husband) partner of our dear friend, Louis. Pat buzzed around being the perfect hostess, making everyone feel special.

Aunt Pat and I shared the same birthday and sometimes would celebrate together at Andy and Sarah's house. She was so beautiful and sweet! I'll miss her. Love to her family and Ken.

Pat, where do I start. I had the luxury of taking her food orders and filling her soda pops when she’d come in with Ken at RB for their lunch meals. She would always crack jokes and put a smile on your face no matter how bad of a day you were having.  “One tough cookie” I’d call her. She’ll be heavily missed.

My 1st-4th grade music teacher, who said I was a horrible singer, Miss Page, met Aunt Pat once at a school pickup. After meeting her, Aunt Pat remarked, "She looks like a used baton twirler." About a month later, Miss Page mentioned that she had twirled baton in college. I was astounded at Aunt Pat's keen powers of observation. 

Aunt Pat and I both thought that Stevie Wonder's song, Sir Duke, where the lyrics are, "They can feel it all over" was actually "puking feelings of love". It took many years to learn the truth.

When I was little, Aunt Pat and I flew on an Allegheny Airlines flight. Aunt Pat looked at the logo and said, "There go the flying  F-ing ducks." I rightly assumed that's what you tell people when you see one of their airplanes. After Mom and Dad picked us up, I proudly reported, "Hey look! There goes the flying F-ing ducks!" Knowing that Aunt Pat and not 5 yr old Gus had crafted that mission statement, I didn't get in trouble but I also didn't understand the laughter.

Where do I start with my dear Aunt Patti?
I remember being in awe of her makeup routine when I was very young. I would sit and watch her for the hour or two it took to paint her face and she would make me laugh the whole time and put makeup on me. Even as a young child I knew she was the prettiest one in our family without makeup and wondered why she spent so much time on it. But I remember the excitement I felt when we knew she was coming for a visit.  She was also the best cook in our family.  She usually started with a stick of butter. I remember she always had all of us laughing. She had a stroke when I was 7 months pregnant and I would drive to Chicago to go be at her side and she would have me cry-laughing as she would tell jokes out of the one side of her mouth. She would make jokes about everything and everyone and lit up whatever room she was in with her smile. I miss you and love you so much my dear aunt. 

I lost my dear partner, friend, and wife of 33 years last Friday, May 1, 2020.  Pat was a wonderful person who touched the lives of many people both as a friend and in her career as a professional social worker.  As I talked to friends and family this past week, I discovered everyone had a, “Pat Story.”  I invite you to use this page to share yours.  I will you love forever my baby girl and I will miss you forever.

So sad to learn about Pat's passing and extend my condolences to Ken and the Family.  She was a loving, caring and thoughtful person who will be missed.  Rest in peace my friend...

Aloha,

Tyson Reyes

OBITUARY

Patricia Palmer Millar

11 June, 1937 – 1 May, 2020

Valley Funeral Home

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