Peter Melville Kayll

17 November 1938 — 18 December 2023

With deep sadness we announce the passing of Peter Melville Kayll. He spent his final two months in Nanaimo Regional General Hospital. Though he remained mentally sharp until the end, he was unable to overcome the complications of a failing heart. Peter slipped away early in the morning after being moved to palliative care only hours before.

Born at St. Paul’s Hospital in Vancouver BC, Peter turned 85 just a month before he died.

Because Peter desired no service, his family chose to include a longer than average written tribute here.

We begin by getting an important detail straight. Though most people mispronounce it on the first try, Peter’s surname rhymes with “smile:” fitting because his own smile was broad and infectious.

Peter is survived by Patricia (“Pat”) Ann Kayll (née Barnett), his loving wife of 62 years and resident of Parksville, BC. Their children are Mark Kayll (Jennifer Walworth) of Missoula, Montana and Wendy Wilson (Glen) of Maple Ridge, BC. Peter had three grandchildren: Wendy’s son Kayll Spence (Dorothy Stanwood); and Mark & Jennifer’s children Samuel Kayll and Leah Walworth.

Peter was the last born into a medium-sized family of four boys, but his biological mother Mary died unexpectedly when he was just two. For a spell, he was cared for by his beloved Aunt Alvie, Mary’s sister fifteen years her junior. In 1944, when his father Swinburne remarried (to Ivy), then five-year-old Peter was suddenly surrounded by a large and loving “Brady Bunch” family: Patsy Chapman, Dyne Kayll, John Kayll, Charles Chapman, Victor Chapman, and James Kayll (in that birth order). Of his siblings, only James (Jenny) survives Peter.

Peter grew up in one of the last-standing iconic houses in Vancouver’s West End, at 1997 Beach Avenue. He shared a room with his closest brother, Jim, and had fond memories of leaning out their third-floor window playing “white-wall tires, can’t tag back.” For his early education, he attended Lord Roberts School and later King George High School, graduating in 1956; he went on to complete Grade 13 at King Edward High School. He attended UBC for one year, later confessing that he spent too much time playing basketball to be a successful university student. Having grown up near Stanley Park, Peter also spent many hours honing his tennis game. He shared these beloved pastimes with his son Mark, who eventually could take Peter in basketball but never in tennis. Peter also consistently prevailed in golf, even winning their last visit to the links when Peter was in his eighties.

Stanley Park includes Deadman Island, housing HMCS Discovery, the small naval base home to the Captain Vancouver Corps of the Royal Canadian Sea Cadets. As a boy, and later as a father, Peter spent some impressionable years there. As anyone who knew him will recall, he played bugle in the marching band (a skill he loved to demonstrate for anyone and everyone, well into adulthood). Regarding his bugler insignia, Peter remembered with pride answering a question of Prince Philip (His Royal Highness, the Duke of Edinburgh) during an annual inspection in the mid-1950s. In his late teens, he held the honour of being the Corps’ Drum Major. Twenty years later—when his son became a cadet—Peter proudly served as a commissioned officer in the very same sea cadet corps.

Stanley Park was also the scene of an episode leading to Peter’s motorcycle phase. Around age 18, he spotted—abandoned in the bushes—a familiar bike: a Triumph 650 twin. When he wheeled it back to his neighbourhood and showed the owner the damaged bike, Peter offered to clean it up and return it to tip-top condition. In return, the owner loaned it to Peter for the rest of the summer, much to Swin and Ivy’s disapproval and dismay. Wearing no helmet, Peter would sling his (also newly acquired) banjo on his back and ride the speedy bike to his lessons. Perhaps this provided some level of redemption in Swin’s eyes (he being a banjo player too).

On the topic of banjos, another contemporary player was Captain Roy Barry, Swin’s dear friend who’d remained close to Peter after Swin’s 1962 passing. Unlike Peter’s own parents, both gone before he turned 24, Roy lived to a ripe old age and was considered one of the family, like a surrogate father to Peter. Also adept on guitar, Captain B was even the go-to-guy in teaching Peter’s daughter Wendy the basics. Despite Roy being well into his eighties by then, Peter reveled in having a family member help pass the musical torch to his daughter.

With his maternal grandparents (the Hardys of Chilliwack, BC) having twelve children, Peter had more cousins than he or his children could keep track of. He was close with many of them, especially Ted and Doreen Ramage (Sunshine Coast and Whistler, BC), Kathryn and Lionel Garnier (both d.2023), Rod and Shelly Ramage (Pitt Meadows, BC), Roy Hardy (d.2023), Louise Pope (d.2022), Bill McQueen (Vancouver, BC), and Marilyn Coan (North Vancouver, BC). It broke his heart to see so many cousins passing in recent years.

Several summers of Peter’s formative years were spent living and working at the Hardy family farm in Chilliwack. There the seeds were planted to instill the importance of extended family in Peter’s world view. The hard work also laid the foundation for his oft-stated maxim, “If you’re going to do something, then do it right.” By that time, in the 1950s, his dear uncle Sidney Hardy (“Sid,” husband of Edna and father of Roy mentioned above) was running the farm. Peter remained close to Sid until his uncle’s passing in 1989.

Peter’s first job outside the family was delivering groceries for Dennet’s Meat Market in Vancouver’s West End. Meeting so many people in this pursuit must have made a positive impression because most of his working life centred on sales: first with Western Marine, selling inboard diesel engines, then Scott Paper, Grip Clinch Fasteners, Wright Mariner Supply, and finally retiring in 2006 from Howard Carter Lease Division.

In 1957, Peter met the love of his life Patsy Barnett while they were living in proximity in the West End: he in the aforementioned family home, she in an apartment with her recently widowed father. It was her 19th birthday, and it may have been love at first sight in one direction, but Pat didn’t enjoy her friends teasing her about that “tall, goofy, red-headed boy who’d started waving to her from his porch.” In any case, they ended up together, marrying in 1961. They celebrated their 62 years of marriage in April with Mark and his family at their favourite Qualicum brunch spot. Along the way, they shared many happy times with family and friends: at (Louise’s parents) Les and Alvie Pope’s Kalamalka Lake cabins; at Sakinaw Lake both with Ted & Doreen Ramage and with Wayne & Diana Whyte; on their beloved sloop-rigged sailboat, The Koh (Sea Otter), and—in their retirement years—in Maui, Hawaii as many times as they could squeeze in (more than three but less than ten!). In 2021, they were honoured by a framed message from Queen Elizabeth II on the occasion of their 60th wedding anniversary.

In retirement, Peter and Pat moved from their longtime home city of North Vancouver to Craig Bay in Parksville, BC. There Peter found a new avocation, or, perhaps more accurately, a “second vocation.” In true OJT fashion (On-Job-Training), he entered the practice of wood-carving. In his sixteen island years, Peter produced upwards of a hundred works of art: carved, painted, copper leafed, rope adorned, you name it. His favourite medium was yellow cedar while his primary genre was relief carving of Haida designs. He also experimented with three-dimensional figures and two-sided decorative paddles. With the many gifts he created for friends and family, Peter enlivened the halls and walls of countless loved ones (and never once sold any of his creations).

Peter wouldn’t describe himself as a “career man;” family and service were much more important to him than his employment. In the early 1980s, he had a heart-to-heart conversation with his company’s owner about his career path. The owner wanted Peter to commit to more travel, which he declined on the basis of being a “family man.” His frankly expressed position was the beginning of the end of his employment with that company, but he truly was a family man. And he was always eager to grow family—he’d be the first to tell family members’ new partners that they’re “one of the family.” Peter also valued staying in touch—in recent years phoning his cousin Kathryn every Friday afternoon. Maintaining and strengthening family connections were part of his chemistry.

As far back as anyone can remember, Peter joined and actively participated in organizations: a gymkhana auto club; the Kinsmen; Sales & Marketing Executives International; the Northwest Lacrosse Association; North Vancouver Minor Hockey; the Royal Canadian Sea Cadets; the Royal Navy Sailing Association; Strata Council; Craig Bay’s WMPG (Wednesday Morning Project Group); and his beloved Oceanside Wood Carvers Club. This list only scratches the surface! And Peter always stepped up as an organizational leader, with titles including Bulletin Editor, Kingo TV BINGO Organizer, President, Head Coach, Commissioned Officer, Captain, and Head Painter.

On a holiday, Peter could never relax without having a Project (with maybe a book as second choice). He was like a border collie. Countless family and friends were the beneficiaries of his restless need to feel physically productive, be it through painting, building, washing, moving, lifting, hauling, cleaning, assembling . . . one gets the idea!

That doesn’t mean Peter didn’t know how to play. As often as anything else, he loved his recreation to involve water: boating, swimming, diving, water-skiing, scuba diving, body surfing, snorkeling. If it involved water, he loved it. In 1972, he embarked with his young family on a big move, returning to Vancouver after six years in Calgary. His son overheard Peter telling someone his motivations: to “get back to the coast,” i.e., to be back in the neighbourhood of the ocean.

One dramatic water experience showed what a fighter Peter was. With his son and his cousin Ted, he was scuba diving near Earl’s Cove, BC. In his excitement as a new diver, he quickly exhausted his air supply. Some people drown in that situation, but Peter quickly swam over to Ted and (forcefully) began buddy-breathing.

In his mid-forties, Peter faced a fight of larger import: diagnosis with colon cancer. With Peter’s mother having died in her forties, this health crisis certainly gave the whole family a scare. But here we are, 40 years later, eulogizing Peter’s long, productive, and fulfilling life. A fighter—and a winner—indeed.

“Your back wheel’s going around frontwards.” That’s just one of many sayings without which no Peter Kayll obituary would be complete. These undoubtedly reverberate in uncountable loved ones’ heads. “In the fish barrel behind the piano” — for a missing item. “What do you want me to do, stand on my head and spit nickels?” — a defense upon having given too lacklustre a response. “Go ahead, back up” — essential part of a driveway goodbye. “What did Bill Shakespeare have to say?” — whenever a Shakespearian work was on someone’s reading list. Here’re a few on

food . . . “It just came out of the fridge!” — when someone burned themselves on piping-hot food. “No thanks, just had a banana” — when he didn’t care to accept a food offering. “If there is any” — having been offered something that was obviously plentiful. “That was delicious, what there was of it” — having eaten a bountiful meal. And one final classic: “Bravo Zulu!” — a cryptic but enthusiastic show of congratulations on a job well done.

Bravo Zulu to Peter Kayll on a life well-lived. His family and friends already miss him immensely.