Carmen "Joy" Gloria Flaxel

Born on June 12, 1935, in Denver, Colorado, Joy was the only child of Frank and Gaetana Merelli. Growing up in a large Italian family brought her immense joy and instilled in her a lifelong love for connection and community. Her parents owned a nightclub (The Aeroplane) in Denver, which undoubtedly influenced her vibrant social nature and love for gatherings.

Joy attended Colorado State University, where she met her first husband, Bill Gardner. Together they moved to John Day, Oregon—Bill’s hometown—and started their family with the births of their two children, Christina and Bill. Tragically, Joy became a young widow when Bill passed away suddenly. Despite this profound loss, Joy demonstrated remarkable resilience and courage as she moved to Portland to attend school while raising her children.

While in Portland, fate intervened when a mutual friend introduced Joy to a young medical student named John Thad Flaxel on a blind date. It was love at first sight; the couple married just three months later. Their union was one of deep affection and partnership that lasted until John’s passing. Together they had four children—Kathy, Teresa, Gina, and Johnny—and built a life filled with love and adventure. The two were inseparable and known for their enduring bond; they continued holding hands until the very end of John’s life.

Joy’s Catholic faith was central to her life. She attended church faithfully wherever she went—even while traveling—and served as an inspiring role model for her grandchildren through her devotion and generosity of spirit. Her unwavering positivity and radiant smile left an indelible mark on everyone who knew her.

A woman of many passions, Joy embraced life with enthusiasm and warmth. She loved being social and cherished time spent with friends over coffee or at gatherings like bridge games or gourmet club dinners. An avid sports fan, she cheered passionately for the Oregon Ducks and Portland Trail Blazers.

Traveling internationally brought Joy great happiness as she explored new cultures alongside John during his medical mission trips to Ecuador or on personal adventures abroad. At home, she found joy in gardening, spending time with her dogs and knitting scarves and sweaters for her loved ones—a testament to her nurturing spirit.

After her husband John passed in 2023, she found joy in spending time with her children and grandchildren. They had many sleepovers and movie nights. They spent time going out to dinner, visiting Black Butte Ranch, attending Portland Trail Blazer games, and she never missed a happy hour enjoying her drink of choice, a gin & tonic.

Family was always at the heart of Joy’s life. She is survived by her children—Bill, Christina, Kathy, Teresa, Gina, Johnny; along with 12 grandchildren and 5 great grandchildren.

Joy’s legacy is one of love: love for family, faith, friends, and life itself. Her memory will continue to inspire those who were fortunate enough to know her.

May her memory bring comfort to all who mourn her passing.