Kenneth William James

Kenneth William James was a modest man, quiet and observant in his ways. He was trustworthy and traditional in his approach to his life and in his relationships. He was tough-minded with the kind of “stick to it” attitude that earned the respect of all who knew him. He was also a man who was meticulous, carefully disciplined, and orderly in virtually everything he undertook. Realistic about life, he was always at the ready, prepared to take on responsibility.

      Kenny was born on November 27, 1947 at Guelph General Hospital in Guelph, Ontario. His parents are Flora and the late Bill James. Kenny was raised in Monteith, Burwash and Sault Ste. Marie all located in Ontario. Burwash was a prison farm where his dad was a superintendant of the prison. He was brought up to be self-confident and dependable. These were traits that would serve him well throughout his life.

      Growing up in the James household was a bit different than most homes. There were good times to be had, but just as often there was a fair share of challenges as well. However, Kenny was able to work through the usual family problems when they appeared, and he was the one person in the family who seemed able to keep the stress at bay. Kenny was raised with 2 siblings. Kenny had one older brother, Freddie, who had died before Ken was born and one older sister, Luella and one younger sister, Charleen. Kenny was constantly involved in activities with his sisters. Kenny and his siblings may have had the typical rivalries while grow ing up but Kenny was always consistently loyal to his family. In Kenny's later years he embraced his new found sister, Margaret.

      As a young child, Kenny was never someone who needed to be the center of attention. He wasn’t pushy and never forced his way into games or other activities. Kenny developed a variety of interests, though, and the things he enjoyed doing he did well. He was always curious about the world around him and was often eager to explore it. Kenny took part in hockey and baseball. He was a cub and a boy scout. In his spare time he liked chess, jigsaw puzzles and collecting comic books. Kenny's memorable achievements included being the best paperboy in town and learning how to play the violin. However, what Kenny enjoyed most was simply playing and spending time with his many friends.

      While his teachers and even his friends generally thought of Kenny as being a serious person, he managed to have a pretty good time in high school as he made that critical transition from adolescence to adulthood. He attended Lo Ellen High School and Lockerby Composite High School in Sudbury and graduated from Bawating High School in Sault Ste. Marie in 1966. He enjoyed some courses more than others, having favorite classes and teachers. His favorite class in high school was machine shop. The teacher he enjoyed learning from the most was Mr. Jack McCrady. To finish high school and move on to make some money was Kenny's motivation to graduate. Kenny was a very logical person who enjoyed learning about factual information. Using his exceptional memory, he was able to learn much through observation. Kenny always seemed to have a command of the facts and was able to make it seem as though he could easily master any problem that might be presented to him.

      Always considered to be a solid friend, Kenny was fortunate to have numerous acquaintances and several very close friends during his life. Since he disliked making generalizations about people and preferred to draw his own conclusions based on direct observation, Kenny was able to see beneath the surface of relationships and became a true friend to those who knew him. He was committed to his friends and valued the trust he placed in them. It was not uncommon for Kenny to go beyond the call of duty for others, and friends frequently sought him out for advice because he had a knack for coming up with practical solutions to any type of dilemma. While growing up, some of his best friends were Ron Degazio, Jack Cartlidge, Allen Jones, Mike Curtin and Gord Daley. Later in life, he became friends with Ken Jewitt, Carmen Griggs, Tom Bayles, Jim and Dorieta Major, Don and Norna Deluney, Tom and Lori Desjardins, Rick Gadde, Art and Debbie Tremblay and always maintained a best friend with Ron Degazio, his brother-in-law.

      On February 14, 1997, Valentine's Day, Kenny exchanged wedding vows with Gill St. John at the Water Tower Inn in Sault Ste. Marie, Ontario. Compassionate and devoted to Gill, Kenny held endearing, traditional values about marriage and family life. He took the responsibility of marriage to heart, giving it his total commitment. He was a source of strength to Gill and using his gifts at nurturing one-on-one relationships, he worked hard to make his new family happy.

       Kenny was blessed with 2 special daughters, Tracy and Becky, they meant the world to him. He was a good parent to them, always firm yet fair in his dealings. He would always listen carefully and think things through before he acted, even when it was an adverse situation. Gill and Kenny were also blessed with three grandchildren, (his buds) Rowan and Brady and (Miss P) Penelope.

      Kenny greatly enjoyed what he did for a living. He was a hard worker who expected the same in return from his co-workers. He was skilled at working effectively in small groups and in one-on-one situations as well as handling solo assignments efficiently. Kenny enjoyed dealing with concrete ideas and could penetrate any amount of fuzzy information to reach the essential facts. He was an efficient worker, one who paid careful attention to detail. His primary occupation was a power technician and then a Safety Supervisor. He was employed for 27 years by Great Lakes Power and then contracted his services out to Mike Moore and Sons for 5 years. Kenny worked hard to be a team player, doing what was necessary in order to get the job done.

      Kenny liked to experience things first-hand as well as learn about them. This trait carried over into his hobbies, where he was very methodical in how he organized his activities and categorized things. Since he enjoyed his private time, Kenny always tried to allocate a specific time for working on his hobbies. His favorite pursuits were jig saw puzzles, fishing, hunting and working with heavy equipment especially his own tractor. Kenny was content to enjoy his hobbies alone but was also willing to share his interests with others.

      Kenny found pleasure in sports. Being a person who was comfortable making win/lose decisions throughout life, he could appreciate that athletes made those types of decisions in sports. In high school, Kenny played hockey. Recreational sports included the coaching of ladies softball teams. He would watch his favorite sporting events whenever he got the opportunity. Tops on his list was cheering on the Soo Greyhounds (hockey) and to be in the stands cheering on his grandsons.

      Many organizations were grateful to have Kenny as a member, since he always brought with him a “stick to it” attitude and a high degree of common sense. Using straightforward methods to successfully complete the job, Kenny was a great planner who was incredibly well organized. It seemed that he was able to schedule any event or activity with ease. He always seemed to know exactly what needed to be done. In high school, Kenny was a member of the Chess Club. Throughout his later years, Kenny was an active member of the Royal Canadian Legion and taught boating safety for the Power Squadron where he was a member.

      As a man who always showed great commitment to the things he believed in, it’s little wonder that Kenny was so active in his community. Being practical and mentally disciplined, Kenny preferred to base his decisions on first-hand experiences. Kenny was never afraid to roll up his sleeves and dig right in. Kenny was a member of several community groups, including serving on committees for the Special Olympics held in Sault Ste. Marie and the Electrical Awareness Program regarding electrical safety.

       Kenny was raised Anglican however did not practice but did have faith. He was a sympathetic man who valued his beliefs.

      Kenny sought out practical solutions, not individual recognition. He was always grounded and objective, feeling a strong sense of responsibility for taking care of what needed to be done. This selfless attitude earned Kenny many accolades for his efforts and achievements. The most prestigious award was the Construction Safety Award for Mike Moore and Sons. Ken implemented a safety program that was recognized nationally and was able to receive this award in Puerto Rico.

      Kenny enjoyed traveling and taking vacations. Since he was an early starter and had a knack for planning everything, traveling with Kenny appeared effortless. He enjoyed researching all of his examined options and applying cost-effective planning techniques. Plus, no matter where he traveled, Kenny always had a back up plan at the ready, just in case. Favorite vacations included Scottsdale, Arizona; St. Petersburg, Florida; cruising the Carribean and as a youngster travelling out west to his parents' homestead located in Saskatchewan.

      Kenny was a lover of animals and cherished his pets. One of Kenny's favorites was Sammy, his 11 year old miniature dachsund, his best friend and protector who could do no wrong. As A child Kenny's family was rounded out by his cats, Snowball and Whitey.

      When Kenny's retirement finally arrived in 2004, he was well prepared. He always trusted and placed value in what was logical and in the things he knew, so he was very confident in planning his retirement. He had begun the process early and had his retirement all laid out well in advance. His new life involved relocating to Hilton Beach whereby he renovated the cottage on the lake to become Gill's and Kenny's permanent residence. In retirement, he found new pleasure in working his tractor on his property and always being there in helping out his nieghbours. Even in retirement, Kenny continued to stay in touch with his old friends while making plenty of new acquaintances. He was active in his new community and felt fulfilled.

      Kenneth William James passed away on July 31, 2012 at ARCH, Algoma Residential Community Hospice. Ken was diagnosed with colon cancer in April 2004, 9 days after returning from a 7 week vacation in Florida. Kenny was given a year however fought a brave battle for 3 years and 3 months never complaining and always remaining positive and always had a smile on his face. He is survived by his wife, Gillian; his daughters, Tracy and Becky; son-in-laws Cam and Bill and grandchildren, Rowan, Brady and Penelope; his mother, Flora James and his sisters Margaret, Luella and Charleen and his best friend and brother-in-law Ron. Services were held at Arthur Funeral Home located in Sault Ste. Marie. Kenneth was laid to rest in the urn garden located at Greenwood Cemetary.

      Commitment is a key word that can be used to describe the life of Kenneth William James. He was committed to living the life of a good man who was both practical and trustworthy. He was committed to the traditional values that he upheld his entire life. He committed himself to being a hard worker who expected the same effort in return from those around him. Most of all, he was committed to those he knew and loved.

Kenny will be missed and loved but never forgotten, he left his mark on all of us.

Obituary:

JAMES, Kenneth – “I have fought the good fight. I have finished the race. My journey has ended”. Peacefully at the Algoma Residential Community Hospice surrounded by his family on Tuesday, July 31, 2012 in his 65th year. Loved so much by his wife, Gillie (Gillian), a cherished ‘Papa Ken’ of Tracy (Cam) Gelder and Becky (Bill) Tibble. Treasured grampa to Rowan, Brady and Penelope. Much loved son of Flora and the late Bill James. Dearest brother of Luella, Charleen, Margaret and the late Freddie and a very special brother-in-law to Ron Degazio. Ken was loved and will be missed by Andi and Paul Bowden. Survived by numerous family and friends who loved and respected Kenny’s unmeasured generosity and strength of character. I cannot forget to mention Sammy, Kenny’s devoted pup who could do no wrong. Ken was an awesome hockey grampa, devoted and protective husband, mentor and friend. Ken we will miss you and feel so blessed and honoured to carry on your legacy of devotion to family. You will be in our heart forever. Special thanks to Dr. Spadafora, Dr. Booth, Dr. Buehner, Amy and Mel of Bayshore and the exceptional staff of ARCH for their outstanding care in Ken’s final days. Also, Allen Jones a lifelong friend for his kindness and pastoral devotion to the family’s needs and wishes. In lieu of flowers or any other contribution, the family has requested a donation be made to ARCH. Friends may call at the Arthur Funeral Home & Cremation Centre on Monday, August 6, 2012 from 2 – 4 pm. Memorial Service to be held in the chapel on Tuesday, August 7, 2012 at 2 pm. Mr. Allen Jones officiating. Interment Greenwood Cemetery.

Kenny's Words To Gillie Thru Tracy:

Mom,

Kenny loved reading cards and writing to you. While at ARCH he asked if I could find a card for you - Mom he really wanted to write his thoughts to you, to let you know how much he loved you and appreciated all your quirkiness :) He loved you so much Mom. Never forget that!

Big hugs Ma!

Tracy

My Kenny Was Such a Wonderful Man:

My Kenny was such a wonderful man. I’m not sure I can really express just how much I will miss him.

Not only was he a wonderful husband, but a wonderful special dad, grandpa, brother, son, best friend, colleague ...and so much more.

Ken’s ability to make everyone feel comfortable, secure and loved were his greatest strengths.

It has been just over 15 years since we were first married and I look back over those years with so much happiness and yes there were moments.

I remember the first time I saw him – I was working in the the assignment department at Bell Canada and 2 new installers were being introduced. I knew then that Ken was someone special however as fate has it our life’s went separate ways until August of 1995. We had changed so much over the years however we both knew each other when we saw one another in the line up at KFC. It didn’t take long from that first encounter in 1995 that our lives were destined to come together. Imagine……. we fell in love.

Kenny’s good nature attracted people the moment he walked in the room, and no one could forget his raucous, opinionated ideas and comments.

Kenny was thrilled to be known as ‘Papa Ken’ to Tracy and Becky. They brought so much joy to him. The girls, I believe, and I have to say myself, had to be the best thing that happened to Kenny. I saw how they went to him for advice – even if they did run off and do the opposite. He would always be there to pick up the pieces and sort things out if called upon. They respected and loved him deeply. Then along came his Rowan, Brady and Penelope his adoring grandchildren. The love for his ‘buds’ and ‘Miss P’ will be forever engrained in me, he loved them so much, they were everything to him. Someone who probably does not know what is going on is our dear Sammy. Sammy was Kenny’s protector, faithful best friend and could do no wrong in Kenny’s eyes.

Kenny was a giving man. Kenny always encouraged me to be involved in life – he bought out the best in us all. He would always say, ‘You can’t rest on your laurels, Gill. You must keep forging ahead and make the best of everything”.

He was my soul mate and my inspiration – my steadfast rock that helped me through thick and thin. Kenny supported and loved us all, and was always there to help navigate through life’s challenges.

Kenny may be in heaven now, but I know he is looking down at us with a big smile on his face saying, “Forge ahead – make the best of life – and I’ll see you soon. We have work to do up here, too.”

Goodbye, my dear, sweet husband, until we meet again god bless.

I will love you forever……….

Remember from Kendra:

Hi Uncle Kenny,

I hope it is okay that I am sending this. I think about you everyday. I try to hear your medical updates from mom with a brave front, but often find myself thinking of what I would like you to know before I don't have a chance to tell you. I don't want to "wish" I sent this note - I hope you understand what I mean.

I have titled this "Remember" and really, it is just that, what I remember. Writing this has made me laugh and cry and just smile. I have been giggling and elaborating on stories as I share with my kids and Ryan. I really hope you enjoy reading it and can feel from it who you have been to me in my life.

Remember

I remember...

...the smell of your house on 3rd line. The wood smell. I remember that the stairs to the basement has swinging gate doors which I always thought were neat.

I remember when we would visit and it was nice outside, we would hang out on the deck in the back. I would get to have a pop… probably Pepsi! :) I remember Willy and I making those coat hanger Christmas trees in your living room one holiday season.

I remember…

…sail boating with you back to Bruce Mines many, many weekends. I was always so excited when the timing worked out that I could go back with you. Then we would have jobs to do to close up the boat for the week and drive back into the Sault in your big blue van.

Remember the storm when your boat drifted across the bay, anchor and all.

I remember…

…at the farm in Goulais one year, we celebrated my birthday with my friends. I must have been turning 6 or 7. When it was time for everyone to receive their goody bag, I was so upset because I wasn’t getting one. You walked me down the hall quietly and explained to me that the loot bags were to say thank you to my friends for coming and bringing me presents. You made me feel better.

I remember…

…all too well how you deliberately cheered for any team other than the Greyhounds! Oh how you made it your mission to embarrass me! :) And you would out cheer and out boo any Hound fans in our section. Then as a great sport, you wore a Greyhound sweater to the Memorial Cup championship game with Mom and Dad and the Gibsons back in 1993. You supported the right team when it counted!!

I remember…

…earing very generous pocket money from you for cleaning your apartment and doing up your laundry when you were a new bachelor. I chuckle remembering how mom labeled your socks, pants, etc to coordinate because you were colour blind.

I remember…

…the many times you stepped in and saved me from Grandpa’s relentless teasing. You knew when I had had enough.

I remember…

…how you always lent me your vehicle (Jimmy/Bronco) when you went away on your work trips. I was a pretty lucky teenager to be trusted with a vehicle to use all to myself.

Santa Claus – where to begin!

First, I remember that we got special visits from Santa Claus every Christmas Eve. As we got older I remember that we (the cousins) wondered by why Santa came, Uncle Kenny disappeared. Then I think Celisa and Willy (at different years) wondered about Santa’s hands and how they looked like Uncle Kenny’s – the next year Santa wore gloves. And also, that Santa sounded like Uncle Kenny – the next year I think you put cotton balls in your cheeks. When we questioned our mom, she so easily explained that you were on of Santa’s helpers. So off we went to school to share with our friends that our Uncle Kenny was one of Santa’s Elves. :)

Those are just some of many memories which I hold and will treasure forever.

Thank you. Thank you for all of these special memories which I will have forever. I will never forget the special Uncle you have been to me. I always felt special and loved by you. And I have always felt that I hold a special place in your heart. You certainly do in mine.

You have shown us the meaning of perseverance and have been bravely fighting this disease head on since you received the news in 2009. You have been strong for others, and shared your journey in an admirable way. Whatever the next part of this journey presents, I hope you hold comfort in the love that is felt for you.

I love you.

Love Kendra

*I shared this letter with Ryan, Marcus and Nikki. Marcus asked me if he could type something…

It is Marcus now. Hi Uncle Kenny. I am sorry that the cancer is going to win. And I am sorry you are in such pain. You will always be in my heart. Goodnight. It is getting really close to night now. Goodnight.

A Reading from Will:

I'm Free

Don’t grieve for me now, I’m free.

I’m following the path God laid for

me. I took his hand when I heard

him call. I turned my back and left it all.

I could not stay another day to laugh,

to love, to work or play.

Tasks left undone must stay that way.

I found that peace at close of day.

If my parting has left a void then fill it

with remembered joy. A friendship

shared, a laugh, a kiss, ah yes, these

things I too will miss. Be not burdened

with times of sorrow, I wish you the sunshine

of tomorrow. My life’s been full, I’ve savored much

good friends, good times, a loved one’s touch.

Perhaps my time seemed all too brief; don’t lengthen

it now with undone grief. Lift up your hearts and share

with me, for God wanted me now.

He set me free.

Brother Ken’s Eulogy:

……. April 17, 2012 (3 years ago today he had a cancerous tumor removed)

Coping with grief is a great challenge… it is also challenging when asked to deliver a eulogy. Like so many of us I am feeling saddened. However in writing this eulogy for my brother, I found it helpful in the healing process.

It is because of love that we grieve, and because of love also that we are comforted in our sorrow. This is a time of gathering all the best of a good life, into the pages of memory, to be held in the heart forever.

We have all lost a person who has meant something special to each of us. Ken was loved as a son, as a husband, as a step-father, a grandfather, a brother, a brother-in-law, an uncle, nephew, cousin, and for so many of you --- a friend!

Ken fought a courageous battle with his illness. He gave us strength in time of his troubles; he insisted on being surrounded with positiveness during this difficult time. It was important to Ken that no one felt as badly as he did – he didn’t ‘check out’ and feel ‘sorry’ for himself.

There is no relationship quite like that which exists between siblings and the two of us shared a long history together. Ken was my first male friend in life – While people came and went in our lives; we knew we would always be in each other’s hearts for a lifetime.

Wherever a beautiful soul has been, there is a trail of beautiful memories…..

Ken has always been a character who could make you laugh with his antics. Charleen and I can remember many situations as children when he would have our parents in absolute stitches with his clowning around. Mother recalls the times he would creep down the stairs and crawl behind the chesterfield and watch the television while she continued to knit….then later she might find him asleep on the floor. Or the times when she would check on him and there was the flashlight still on under the covers – his comic books were his favourite reading material.

In later years when he would be joking about something appearing to be immature at times, I would tease him saying – “you are still a kid inside a man’s body”.

And oh what an obsession he had with neatness --- The bedroom slippers had to be sitting in perfect position for getting out of bed in the morning --- His pen had to be sitting in an exact position on his desk --- His shirts had to be hanging with the hangers facing all the same way. Recently I watched him sitting in his new garage out there on the island, wrapping an old piece of rope –believe me, it was restarted several times before he was satisfied that it was ‘perfect’.

Ken and Ron’s relationship goes back almost 60 years – they shared a lot, and apparently there are a number of stories that will remain ‘untold’. The one thing they did not share was girlfriends given that one was his sister – me!

There was a nurturing side to him too… I recall Ron and I joining him on his power boat for a trip to Manitoulin Island and the wind came up – well I was frightened out there on the big water, but somehow his calmness and explanation of what was going on comforted me. Ken showed this nurturing side on many occasions as a special uncle to his sisters’ children.

Ken also had many strong views on certain subjects and could get pretty ‘intense’ about expressing his thoughts.

I know there were many times when each of you found solace in Ken’s friendship – let me share some of the comments …

… his spirit and respect for life will be part of our memories as a co-worker, a

confidant and mostly as a friend

… he is simply one of the strongest, most determined people I know and I hope he

knew it too

… when I think of Ken I think of what a nice person he was – I recall times when a

kind word or understanding smile from him really made a difference in my day

… when Ken crosses my mind as he warmly does, I imagine all the good he has done

for others flowing back to him in the form of warm, caring thoughts

… Ken’s amazing cheerfulness and smile was always there when talking with him

regardless of how he was feeling – “he will always be riding in the winning car in

my eyes”.

Love is not an easy feeling to put in words, neither is loyalty, trust or joy – Ken was all of these. He loved his life completely and lived in intensely.

Ken had many accomplishments in his life – a few examples are:

. he personally taught himself the new world of computers

. he could lead projects both at work and in the community (ie the Electrical Awareness

Program for schools, communities and corporations – a huge success)

. and did you know, he taught boating power squadron courses

The highlight of his life, he so proudly expressed to all, was the acceptance and love shown to him by his dear wife, two stepdaughters, and then the addition of their 3 grandchildren.

Gill – you were his sole mate – your devotion in caring for Ken during these difficult years will never be forgotten.

Gill and family … in quiet – may you find comfort

in memory – may you find healing

in the power of love – may you find peace

Our brother would not want to be remembered with tears and sadness.

He need not be idealized or enlarged in death beyond what he was in life, but to be remembered simply, as a good and decent man!

In closing - THOSE WHO LIVE IN OUR HEARTS…

We cannot control the movement of time

Nor can we control our own destiny

Or the destinies of those we love

But we can take comfort in knowing that those

Who have lived in our hearts

Are never really gone

For as long as we keep them with us

In our hearts and our thoughts

They will be with us always

For love which is timeless

Never ceases to exist …

Prepared and presented

By sister Luella (James) Degazio

At her brother Ken James’ funeral

Tuesday, August 07, 2012

* * * * * * * * * *

JAMES, Kenneth – “I have fought the good fight. I have finished the race. My journey has ended”. Peacefully at the Algoma Residential Community Hospice surrounded by his family on Tuesday, July 31, 2012 in his 65th year. Loved so much by his wife, Gillie (Gillian), a cherished ‘Papa Ken’ of Tracy (Cam) Gelder and Becky (Bill) Tibble. Treasured grampa to Rowan, Brady and Penelope. Much loved son of Flora and the late Bill James. Dearest brother of Luella, Charleen, Margaret and the late Freddie and a very special brother-in-law to Ron Degazio. Ken was loved and will be missed by Andi and Paul Bowden. Survived by numerous family and friends who loved and respected Kenny’s unmeasured generosity and strength of character. I cannot forget to mention Sammy, Kenny’s devoted pup who could do no wrong. Ken was an awesome hockey grampa, devoted and protective husband, mentor and friend. Ken we will miss you and feel so blessed and honoured to carry on your legacy of devotion to family. You will be in our heart forever. Special thanks to Dr. Spadafora, Dr. Booth, Dr. Buehner, Amy and Mel of Bayshore and the exceptional staff of ARCH for their outstanding care in Ken’s final days. Also, Allen Jones a lifelong friend for his kindness and pastoral devotion to the family’s needs and wishes. In lieu of flowers or any other contribution, the family has requested a donation be made to ARCH. Friends may call at the Arthur Funeral Home & Cremation Centre on Monday, August 6, 2012 from 2 – 4 pm. Memorial Service to be held in the chapel on Tuesday, August 7, 2012 at 2 pm. Mr. Allen Jones officiating. Interment Greenwood Cemetery.