Frances (Fankow) King
Frances King passed away on 16 November 2020 in the afternoon. Her beloved husband Ignatius (George) was at her bedside.
Frances was born in China and lived there until she was 14 years old. In 1949, she left China for South Africa with her older sister Lily to reunite with the rest of the family – her parents and six other siblings. In the late 1950s, while returning to South Africa from a holiday in the Far East via boat, she met her future husband Ignatius. The boat trip lasted 18 days so they had ample time to get to know each other. They later married and had three children – Candy, Bonnie and Roy. Frances and Ignatius were devoted parents and worked hard to educate their children and provide as best they could. After retiring in the mid-1990s, they migrated to Canada. Frances embraced her new home, Vancouver, with gusto. She made new friends, figured out the public transport system, relished the yum cha establishments on offer, took delight in extended shopping hours and even found part-time work. In 2012, Frances was diagnosed with dementia and a bewildering era ensued. In May 2017, Frances moved to St Vincent’s Langara Care Home and resided there until her passing.
Frances was a generous, determined spirit, fiercely protective of family. She is dearly missed by her husband, Ignatius, her children, Candy, Bonnie and Roy, her daughter-in-law, Elisa, her granddaughters, Sarah and Nicole, her sisters, Lily and Ethel, her brother, Norman, and many cousins, nieces, nephews and friends. She will forever remain in our hearts.
A Catholic service will be held on Friday, December 4, 2020 at 1:00PM in the chapel at Victory Memorial Park Funeral Centre, followed by a graveside ceremony. The chapel service will be live-streamed via: https://funeraweb.tv/beloved/45500.
Letter from Norman
Frances, my sister
The earliest recollection I have of my sister was in a hospital room. Frances was in her early teens, about 70 years ago, recovering from surgery. I was several years younger, starting to lose my first teeth, and it was my turn to keep watch. Frances asked me for a ‘ping guo’. She knew very little English and I knew little Chinese. I said there is no ‘ping guo’, only apple, and handed her an apple. I was ribbed for a long time. There is a story why I first met my sister so many years after my birth.
Mother was pregnant for the sixth time when she left Johannesburg to visit her native village in Moiyan for several months. So Frances was born in grandfather’s ancestral home. When Mother left China, the three daughters remained and so Frances spent her early years being looked after by a stepmother, whom she had remembered all her life for the kindness shown to her. After World War II, the three sisters were brought back to South Africa.
Frances worked in the family’s grocery store in Johannesburg. She met Ignatius on a cruise and they married. Ignatius was a teacher in Beira for a few years before relocating to Johannesburg. Both continued to work in the store and lived in a house in Auret Street. I was living in the family home a short distance away, and the weekends were rowdy with family friends congregating for mahjong. Frances offered me a room, which I accepted and stayed for a couple of years, allowing me to continue my medical studies in quietude. Her family is blessed with three children, whom she adored and no sacrifice was too much to give the opportunity to succeed in life.
When the family’s business shut down, Frances and Ignatius ran a convenience store in Bez Valley and lived in a house close by. Saturdays at the store would see Frances cook at the back of the store and have a game of mahjong. It was a highlight for her, Mom and friends, which would include a single mother now deceased, whose sister today still fondly remembers Frances’ kind hospitality. Our family had started to emigrate and Frances built a granny flat at her home to accommodate Mom and Dad. One would have thought that Frances would be aggrieved about her early childhood, but her concern about Mom and Dad never wavered. Her strength of character, her determination to surmount difficulties, her fierce loyalty to Ignatius and her children and rest of the family never wavered. She had an inbuilt sense of Christian values with an underlying softness for the underdog that belied her dogged determination. Frances was there when Dad and Mom died. She was not afraid to voice her concerns when our family had been slighted or ill-treated.
As their three children had emigrated, Frances and Ignatius went overseas as well and settled in Vancouver. They lived in a one-bedroom apartment. When our son visited Canada, Frances and Ignatius vacated their bedroom so the son could have their double bed! The offer was extended to us as well. When our daughter was diagnosed with leukaemia in 1997, Frances asked Roy to help as he had been a leading pathologist in New York and knew the world expert in that field. She was always thinking of the family. In 2008, Frances organised the first family reunion in Moiyan, and again in 2010 and 2012. I was fortunate to be there in 2010 when Frances pointed out to us proudly her bedroom and the bed she slept in. During this particular visit she arranged for us to attend a Mass on a Sunday about half an hour’s drive from Moiyan centre. After Mass, the bishop who presided at the service was donated some money at Frances’ behest. Unfortunately, in 2012, Frances showed signs of early Parkinson’s type disorder, which would slowly progress and leave her in a nursing home. During our visit to her in the nursing home, there was a West Indian lady who visited her every Sunday. The lady and Frances had bonded together during their working days and she would take Frances, who now was confined to a wheelchair, to the chapel for weekly Mass.
So, to Ignatius I thank you for your selfless love for Frances. Your devotion was boundless and your patience firm. Your loss more poignant. Life was no bed of roses and the endless difficulties you experienced especially at the start. I never heard either of you complain about the hardships, and both of you remained true and humble. Your God blessed both of you with beautiful children, Candy, Bonnie and Roy, with Elisa, and granddaughters Sarah and Nicole. We salute you Frances for your kindness and hospitality. Most of all your humility in accepting any hurts you may have suffered, but responding with love, warmth and gentleness. May God bless you abundantly ‘good and faithful servant’. RIP.
Letter from Mary
When I woke to Bonnie’s message that her Mom had passed, the silent tears welled up, the ones that make my chin tremble. For me, this is not an intellectual or rational emotion, but a feeling from the gut and heart. It is a feeling that the passing of a special soul has departed the planet and left it a poorer place. I have felt this way with the passing of Sr Maria, my Mom, Princess Diana, Madiba, my friend Celia, the journalist Suna Venter, my uncle in Portugal and now Mrs. King. For me, these people all suffered greatly and all touched lives in a positive way.
Attending school at the convent in Bez Valley, the King’s home was my second home and they were family. The memories came flooding back. They nurtured my sense of humour, my instinct to think and debate and, not least, my love of food. Whenever Mrs. King would ask me if I wanted a bao, my automatic response was that I never say no to a bao. There were endless discussions into the wee hours in their kitchen, with copious amounts of coffee, tea, peanut butter and honey toast. Mrs. King would pop in and always scold and try to be stern, but then she would burst out laughing …… this is how I remember her. She was a genius in the tiny kitchen in King’s Café, and would whip up the most incredible meals. She was also highly intelligent and a gifted businesswoman. She was an icon and a role model.
Mrs. King always had a deep concern for our wellbeing. Years later, when I worked at Wits, and “occasionally” Candy and I would chat on the phone for a couple of hours, Mrs. King would admonish Candy and tell her that she would make me lose my job. We would laugh – but who cares like that!!
When Sylvia and I visited Candy in Australia for her 50th birthday, Mrs. King, back in Vancouver, sent money for Candy to take the five of us to breakfast on her – who does that!?!
My thoughts and prayers are with you …… Mr. King, Candy, Bonnie, Roy and the rest of the family. You were blessed to have her as your wife and Mom, and the loss for you is great.
Rest in peace Mrs. King. Thank you for being a part of my life. We will never forget you. I know that you are in a better place and that you will continue to guide and keep us safe from there.
Mom
Thank you for giving us LIFE – and thank you for being our Mom.
As children growing up in South Africa you navigated our paths with your unfailing love and protection. You and dad worked so hard for so long to afford each of us an education which sadly you never had the opportunity to have.
We appreciate all the sacrifices you made so that we would have a better and more fulfilled life.
As young adults you taught us by your words and deeds that any adversity in life can be over come by showing LOVE, KINDNESS and FORGIVENESS to each other and to others. We will try to emulate your ways with these qualities.
Mom, you had such an open and generous heart and a big warm smile. You touched so many people’s lives and this is evident in the tributes that have been made in your honour.
As GOD now CARRIES you in HIS loving arms into HIS Kingdom please know that we are heart-broken but we will be fine.
Do not worry about Dad – we will take care of him.
Thank you for being the BEST Mom you possibly could be.
We will always love you Mom.
Farewell.
I’M FREE
Don’t grieve for me for now I’m free,
I’m following the path God laid for me
I took his hand when I heard him call,
I turned my back and left it all
I could not stay another day,
To laugh, to love, to work or play
Tasks left undone must stay that way,
I’ve found that peace at the close of day
If my parting has left a void,
Then fill it with remembered joy
A friendship shared, a laugh, a kiss,
Ah yes, these things I too will miss
Be not burdened with times of sorrow,
I wish for you the sunshine of tomorrow
My life’s been full, I’ve savored much,
Good friends, good times, my loved one’s touch
If my time seemed all too brief,
Don’t lengthen it now with undue grief
Lift up your heart, rejoice with me,
God wanted me now, He set me free.
© 1974, 2018 Anne Lindgren Davison
All rights reserved.
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In Loving Memory of George (Ignatius) King
George (Ignatius) King passed away on 22 May 2024 in the morning.
George was born in China and educated in China and Hong Kong. In his late 20s, he left Hong Kong on a bit of a whim and headed to a teaching job in East Africa … to a small town called Beira, in Mozambique. Not having much money, he could only afford a third-class ticket for the boat trip. But a stroke of luck allowed him to dine with the second-class travellers. And as fate would have it, there he met his future wife, Frances. The boat trip lasted 18 days so they had ample time to get to know each other. They later married and raised three children – Candy, Bonnie and Roy – in Johannesburg, South Africa. George and Frances were devoted parents and worked hard to educate their children and provide as best they could.
After retiring in the mid-1990s, they migrated to Canada. George settled into life in Vancouver. He was able to reconnect with many friends and acquaintances from his China and Hong Kong days – they themselves had relocated to Vancouver. George will be fondly remembered for his love of yum cha.
In 2020, George lost his beloved wife Frances and life was never quite the same. In 2023, George moved to the German Canadian Care Home and resided there until his passing.
George was a quietly spoken man with a generous heart, and fiercely protective of his family. He is dearly missed by his children, Candy, Bonnie and Roy, his daughter-in-law, Elisa, his granddaughters, Sarah and Nicole, his younger brother, Sing, and many cousins, nieces, nephews and friends. He will forever remain in our hearts.
A Catholic service will be held on Thursday, 6 June 2024 at 10:00AM in the chapel at Victory Memorial Park Funeral Centre, followed by a graveside ceremony. Brunch will be served afterwards. The chapel service will be live-streamed via: https://funeraweb.tv/en/diffusions/93991
Letter from Norman
Ignatius, My Brother-in-Law
Marrying Frances, my sister, could have been a daunting choice. Frances was a feisty sister from a large family with an equally determined mother and a supportive father. In that respect the marriages (Frances and Mom) mirrored each other, and the union was a great example of being for better or for worse, in sickness and in health.
Early on, Ignatius first worked as a schoolteacher in Beira, a city in Portuguese East Africa now known as Mozambique. A trying time for a newly wedded couple as the official language was Portuguese, with a large Black population, and Ignatius was teacher for the local Chinese school. After a few years the couple moved to Johannesburg where both worked in the family grocery store for many years. Ignatius and Frances lived close by to the store in Auret Street. Ignatius kindly allowed me to stay with them for a couple of years when I was in medical school, as they felt the environment was conducive for studying …… a gesture I greatly appreciated. The house we lived in in Jeppe was attached to the shop, and weekends were akin to a boarding house, where the Chinese friends used to congregate and play mahjong till the following day. Early in my general medical practice, when I got engaged to Florence, the price of the diamond ring was way out my reach, and there Ignatius was with a loan. A man for all seasons. An admirable trait.
When my parents retired our grocery store closed and they stayed with us in Essexwold for eight years. Frances and Ignatius moved to Bez Valley and bought a house. They ran a profitable cafe a few blocks away, working diligently seven days a week. Frances always found time to have a bit of fun with working and running a store. Weekends would see her playing mahjong with Mom, relatives and friends, in the kitchen at the back of the store. Frances was sharp with money at the shop and on the “table” and was enjoying a double income! Ignatius was happy fronting the shop and basking at having happy relatives enjoying themselves.
However, South Africa’s political landscape was rapidly changing. Apartheid was dismantled and majority rule was ushered in in 1994. Ignatius was held up twice in the store. First, an armed robber demanded money from Ignatius. Ignatius asked how much he wanted. Twenty dollars was the answer, and the note was handed over. The second occasion was when he was held up at gunpoint. It was then decided that they should leave the country for Canada. Candy had left for Australia and Roy for the States.
Ignatius and Frances were very much at home in Richmond, Vancouver, with great company from relatives, friends and new acquaintances. A Chinatown in the making. When my son visited Vancouver, Ignatius and Frances vacated their bedroom for Brendon, while they slept on the sofa in the lounge room. Always a hospitable pair and looking after family. Around 2012, Frances was diagnosed with dementia. When her condition deteriorated, requiring admission to a nursing home, Ignatius would visit her regularly. He missed her terribly and when COVID started he was devastated when the nursing home closed for visitors.
For me, Ignatius was always kind, courteous, determined, constant in high morals. He showed me what daily exercises he would do religiously. That physical activity would help him stay active for 97 years of his life. If he firmly believed what was right, he always stuck to his decision even if it may cost him comfort or loss of income. A good friend. A grateful brother-in-law. A faithful servant. Vale. With a firm hope you and Frances be united in the New Jerusalem. For whosoever shall give you a cup of water to drink in my name, because ye belong to Christ, verily I say unto you, he shall not lose his reward. Mark 12:42,43
To you Candy, Bonnie, Roy with Elisa and daughters Sarah and Nicole …… our heartfelt sympathy on your sad loss.
Norman and Florence
Letter to Dad
Dad,
You left us peacefully at a brilliant age of 97 years. Wow- many have marvelled at how you never looked
your age and neither did you act your age until the very end.
Looking back on your path and destiny in Life it has been a very colorful and interesting one - demanding, challenging, but also fulfilling, successful, loving.
Your journeys took you from your birthplace Canton, China to 4 additional countries where you lived and worked and had a family and eventually retired with Mom here in Canada in 1994.
You expressed your gratitude to have retired in Canada. You reflected at times how you managed to come to Africa as a penniless single, adventurous young man and managed to make a decent living, raise a family and educate your 3 kids. You said it with such pride and joy and satisfaction. We are truly thankful to you & mom for all the sacrifices you made so that we are able to live the lives that we do. Life became increasingly difficult, and your heart was broken when Mom got sick in 2011, and as the years went on you tried your best to navigate your life and to find purpose, especially when Mom left us in 2020.
We were very relieved and happy that you joined the Minoru Seniors Centre and the Kinsmen Adult Day Centre which are both in Richmond. You participated in their social activities twice a week. It gave you an outlet to share experiences with others and our hope was that it helped with the loneliness that you carried with you.
We can never fully know and understand your internal struggles as you seldom expressed them; in fact, you always gave a smile when others asked how you were and you never complained. This was more evident when in October 2023 you moved to a care home in Vancouver.
The staff were always astounded at your gentle manners and smile, and they always commented how polite you were to them when they assisted you. You kept your deep sorrow and loneliness close to your heart.
We hope that during this particular time in your life we were able to comfort you and more importantly, that you felt our love, care, and support.
We will always be grateful to the many family members and friends who visited you in the care home and showed such kindness. They brought in dim sim or Chinese food and even home-made Chinese soup as they knew how much you loved your soup.
We are also grateful to the staff at the home who took care of you till the very end.
You left us on you own terms but not before you gave us a chance to say our goodbyes to you.
You always said: "Don’t waste the time – enjoy your life and don’t argue with each other"
I would like to end with a reading from the Bible from Ecclesiastes:
For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven
A time to be born and a time to die
A time to plant and a time to harvest
A time to kill and a time to heal
A time to tear down and a time to build up
A time to cry and a time to laugh
A time to grieve and a time to dance
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones
A time to embrace and a time to turn away
A time to search and a time to quit searching
A time to keep and a time to throw away
A time to tear and a time to mend
A time to be quiet and a time to speak
A time to love and a time to hate
A time for war and a time for peace
It’s time to say goodbye to you Dad as you finally reunite with Mom. Rest well Dad and be happy – you deserve it
We love you and will remember you & Mom forever.
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