Ruby Kathleen Smith

It is rare that people live in such a way where their friends are beloved as family and their family are beloved as friends. We, the family and friends of Ruby Kathleen Smith, bear witness to the rare gift of God she was. We are grateful to have enjoyed her until January 20, 2011, and offer a very brief glimpse into the remarkable woman she was.

Ruby Kathleen Frazier was born to Cordelia and Homer Frazier February 28th, 1918 at the family farm in Cottonwood Community near Eustace, Texas. Her Aunt Melissa made the delivery and would often say to Kathleen, “Don’t you smart-mouth me, missy; I picked you off the vine.”

In the spring of 1922 when she was four years old, her father sold nearly everything they had in Cottonwood, except the mules and a wagon, with the intent of moving to west Texas. They made it about 30 miles to Navarro County where the soil was black and rich, so they decided instead to make a go of it in Roane, Texas.

Kathleen’s three brothers started school in Roane. The school there allowed younger ones to visit. The first time she visited, the teacher gave her a book to read and was quite surprised and impressed when she did. She was invited to start first grade when she was five. She did very well and skipped the third grade because she was so advanced. She completed the eleventh grade, which was the last grade taught at the Roane school. Her parents sent her to board with some people in Powell so she could complete the 12th grade. However, the school in Powell had a limited curriculum and she would have had to take Latin and Agriculture to graduate. Latin was no problem, but she had no interest in Agriculture and left after two weeks.

Kathleen married Arthur Joshua (A.J.) Smith on Oct 1st, 1936 in Dallas. In the fall of 1937, they found out they would be having their first child. In order to afford a hospital birth, Kathleen worked at a nearby laundry and A.J. chose to forego the bus fare and walked to work each day. On April 26th, 1938, Kathleen gave birth to Homer. Their second child, Sandra Jean, was born March 25th, 1940.

In 1941 A.J. went to work for Greyhound Lines in the maintenance department, but along came World War II. Unable to serve as a soldier, A.J.’s skills as a mechanic were needed by the U.S. Army; he was furloughed to the Civil Service for three years in an Army Traveling Repair Unit. Thus began one of Kathleen’s most challenging and stretching times in her life, as she traveled the country chasing her husband’s unit with two small children and one on the way. She told funny stories of diapers flapping from the car windows. She told of incredible kindness and hospitality of people along the way. She told sad stories of struggling to find food and shelter for her children and the callous indifference of some. She told stories of ingenuity, like how she learned to warm baby bottles on the engine manifold without breaking them. She told of near misses with death for her and her babies. Kathleen gave birth to Arthur Michael (Mike) in Burnet, Texas on December 7th, 1943, while A.J. was stationed at Fort Hood.

When A.J.’s term of Civil Service was up in 1945, they returned to Dallas to pick up where the war had interrupted. A.J. returned to Greyhound and Kathleen to raising her small children. On December 29, 1946, Kathleen gave birth to their fourth child, Cheryl (Sherri) Lynn, and on February 20th, 1949 to her fifth and last child, Kenneth (Ken). Even though the depression was over and the war rationing past them, making ends meet was still a challenge. Kathleen went to work operating a comptometer for a company called Southwestern from 1952 to 1956. The family grew and prospered, living the American dream in Dallas.

In January of 1955, the nightmare of every parent came true for A.J and Kathleen, when daughter Sandra was killed in an automobile accident while driving her friends to a movie. Kathleen was devastated. As a Believer, this time was a landmark test of her faith; she came through it with a profound appreciation for the power of forgiveness: offering it, accepting it, and especially forgiving oneself.

In 1957 A.J. received a lucrative offer from the Pioneer Bus Co. in Houston, so the family packed up and moved. Six months later, the contract Pioneer Bus had with the City of Houston was lost and so was A.J.’s lucrative job. He landed at Saunders Truck Systems, but Kathleen decided to shore up the situation by securing a position with the Harris County Clerk’s office.

1959 brought a completely new dimension to their lives. While Sherri and Ken were still at home, Homer returned from his hitch in the Air Force, bringing with him a wife and their first grandchild. Her babies were now having babies. She continued through the 1960s raising her children and having five more grandchildren. She took to being a grandparent with a spectacular calm and grace.

It was also at this time Kathleen took a keen interest in stocks and investing. She became very knowledgeable about the stock market and investment strategies. She enjoyed discussing the topic and knew her stuff.

In the 1970s Kathleen saw six more grandchildren come along; in the 1980s her last grandchild and first great-grandchild were born. In 1981, she retired from the County Clerk’s office and she and A.J. moved to “the country,” their property near Groesbeck, Texas. One of the highlights during this decade was when they celebrated 50 years of marriage, and again exchanged vows in 1986.

A lifelong passion for Kathleen was fishing. She loved to fish, as did her older brother Raymond, and they often fished together. Kathleen’s proudest fishing moment, which she recounted often, was when she caught a five pound bass. That big bass was mounted and is still proudly on display.

The 1990’s brought along eight more great-grandchildren and they celebrated 60 years of marriage in 1996. But it also took one more of her children, Homer in 1999. It also brought another time of challenge in 1997, when A.J. suffered a massive stroke. Caring for him was a huge undertaking. In 1998 they moved to Spring, Texas where she could have more help in this enormous task. She never complained and when he had to go to a care facility, she went to see him every day until he passed away in 2004. They were married 68 years.

The new century brought eleven more great-grandchildren and her first great-great-grandchild. However, it also took two more of her children. She lost Mike in 2000 and Sherri in 2010. No mother should lose even one of her children, let alone four. Yet she endured it.

You now know a very brief history of Kathleen’s life, but let us tell you now of whom she was. The first word is resilient. Many difficulties and hardships came her way and some would have crushed most people. Yet she always endured, rising above every situation with grace and dignity.

Kathleen was loving, but her love was not a showy love. Yet those whom she loved had no doubt of it. It was free, sure and certain. It was never earned and you couldn’t buy it. You couldn’t lose it either, no matter how hard some of us may have tried. She was very generous and gave freely when anyone was in need, and there were many needs. She selflessly gave of her time and attention. Often without asking, she would provide for those needs and never was anything expected or asked for in return.

Kathleen was ever fair and had the utmost integrity. The biggest testimony to this fact was that over the many years and many sons’ marriages, she is loved and respected by all her daughters-in-law, particularly the exes. Kathleen was also very forgiving. She may have taken offense, but she never held it. The longer she lived, the more gracious she became, except for one thing - losing at dominoes.

Speaking of dominoes, she loved a good game and a good laugh. She could be fiercely competitive with razor-sharp strategy and killer instincts. Some would say her humor was a bit on the dry side, but she was quick and sure with it. To make her laugh was a treat indeed.

Above all, Kathleen was a Godly woman. By her living example, she became our moral compass. She was never pushy with her faith, yet she was firm in her knowledge of her Savior and left no doubt in anyone’s mind she pointed to “true north.” We didn’t always pay attention to the direction she offered, but it wasn’t because she ever wavered. She leaves a larger than life legacy of resilience, faith, generosity, selflessness, forbearance, forgiveness and unconditional love. She leaves us a rich legacy beyond measure.

She is survived by her son and daughter-in-law Mr. and Mrs. Ken Smith of Shenandoah, 13 grandchildren, 20 great-grandchildren, and sweet Bella, her great-great-grandchild. She was preceded in death by her parents and siblings, husband A.J. Smith, her two daughters Sandra Smith and Sherri Jaeger, and two sons Homer and Michael Smith.

A public viewing is scheduled Friday, January 28th from 6-8:00 pm at Forest Park – The Woodlands, 18000 Interstate 45 South, The Woodlands, TX.

A memorial service will be held Saturday, January 29th at 1:00 pm, also at Forest Park – The Woodlands.

A graveside service will be held Sunday, January 30th at 2:00 pm, at Laurel Land Cemetery, 6000 S R L Thornton Fwy, Dallas, TX.