Kelli Elizabeth Lay

Kelli was born in Thousand Oaks, California, on July 31st, 2006, to Damon Lay and Holly Lay (Cantley). She is survived by her parents, stepmother Christine Borrayo, and sisters Jenna Lay and Hannah Lay. Kelli and her sisters loved each other deeply; they had a vibrant sisterhood that can only be understood by this charismatic trio. Kelli’s family extended far beyond her biological one. She was devoted to her friends and her free spirit was never more content than when she was sharing deep talks, silliness, and adventure with her friends.

Due to extended periods of cancer treatment, Kelli was largely self-educated in her teen years. Her curious and beautiful mind drove her to pursue knowledge of many subjects that she could articulately speak to beyond that of many adults. More importantly, Kelli possessed a wisdom of life that only comes through the experience of tremendous challenge. Her room is filled with books on philosophy, existential topics, and the human condition, which resonated with her because she knew she would depart this world too soon. If you knew Kelli, you knew she wasn’t impressed by diplomas, degrees, or awards. She understood that insight, knowledge, and character can’t be captured or represented in rites of passage or pieces of paper.

Kelli had a heart for vulnerable humans and creatures of this world, likely drawn from her own sense of fragility. She lived with a gracious spirit and generous attitude; her heart was troubled by any act that she viewed as unjust, unkind, or prejudiced. She had a deep love for animals, especially cats. During a period of remission at the age of 16, she was employed as a Vet Tech at Midtown Veterinary Clinic, a job that she enjoyed tremendously as it not only put her near animals, but also gave her a sense of independence. She often spoke of fostering rescue kittens if time and circumstance would have allowed. If you wish to do something in Kelli’s name, a cat rescue is a perfect choice.

Kelli loved music and she attended many concerts. She had eclectic and varied musical tastes, but often favored less commercial, alternative artists. Kelli appreciated unique and creative aesthetics, especially where humor was incorporated. She was an artist herself with a love for illustration, mixed media, and photography.

Kelli’s short time on earth did not allow her to pursue what the world might view as conventional achievement. But what she did achieve was an understanding of what many spend a lifetime never understanding. This kind heart and old soul, who wanted so desperately to live, would tell us to not waste our time on anything that doesn’t bring joy, and to remove pettiness from our lives. She would tell us to love deeply and live authentically, and to consider how to use our existence to serve and help others.

If Kelli’s life story moves you, her family asks that you consider how to improve the outcomes of pediatric cancers that are grossly underfunded relative to adult cancers. Please consider a donation to New Approaches to Neuroblastoma Therapy (www.nant.org) or the St. Baldrick’s Foundation (www.stbaldricks.org)

Thank you to The BumbleBee Foundation for organizing donations to the Lay family during the latter part of Kelli’s treatment and for assisting with funeral expenses.

Kelli’s family express their deepest gratitude to the physicians, oncology nurses, and care partners (4 West is Best!) at Children’s Hospital Los Angeles who made such a determined effort to provide Kelli with the best quality of life for as long as possible. Her primary partner on this journey was Dr. Araz Marachelian, CHLA’s neuroblastoma expert. Caring for children with terminal illness is a heartrending sacrifice that is willingly chosen by these selfless nurses and physicians.

Kelli will be interred on August 15th at a private graveside gathering at Pierce Brothers Valley Oaks in Westlake Village, California. A celebration of her life is being planned and will be announced at a later date.