Hi Dad, I miss you so much. I think about you every day and some days I even get to use one or two of your many funny sayings or bits of wisdom.  Mostly though, I just feel a tremendous sense if loss without you.

Grandpa was a little more than just a grandpa to me.  I spent just about every other weekend with him and many weeks during the summer.  He always had adventures planned.  He took me to the Buffalo science museum to see the dinosaur exhibit, and the giant bug exhibit.  He took me to Niagara Falls, Old Fort Niagara, the butterfly museum in Ontario, and countless train related exhibits.  

We also spent a lot of time on the couch together, meticulously peeling oranges, or building small dinosaur replicas.  He took me to cooking lessons at Tops every time I came to visit for almost a year.  We made parfait together.  At home he showed me how to make a proper gravy, and how to make an apple pie that doesn't get soggy.  

I used to just sit and watch and wait while he rode his exercise bike in the upstairs hallway after going around the entire house making all the beds.  

I've learned so much from him and our mishmash adventures. Mainly, that adventures anywhere, any day, are special and important.  He lived to the fullest and loved just as much.  

And I thank him for everything he's given me and every moment we've shared.

Vincent McLean- father, grandfather, great-grandfather, inventor, friend, devoted husband, Manhattan aficionado, the original extreme couponer, teacher, author, pie-maker extraordinaire, ice cream enthusiast and turkey carving technician, grapefruit cutting pro and so, so much more!  

I am truly enriched for having gone through the experience of his death and I'm so grateful that I could say goodbye.  (Not that a goodbye is enough, mind you.)   

I will miss you, grandpa.

My Eulogy to Dad:

Helen Keller wrote:
Life is a daring adventure – or it is nothing –

If that is true then my father, Vincent McLean lived  a great life. He was the smartest, kindest,  most fun loving,  adventurous person I ever hope to know.

For those of you who may not know me, I am Susan, Vincent's eldest daughter.  I want to thank everyone for being here today and for spending time with my family to honor my father.  
Mac, as many of you call him was born Vincent Charles, McLean.  He was born on Easter Sunday,  April 16, 1922, in Buffalo, NY. He was the youngest child of Austin McLean, a recent Irish immigrant and Nellie Wright, a housekeeper.  Vincent was born at home and lived for many years on the west side of Buffalo.
Vincent attend elementary school at Holy Angles Academy, where he was an altar boy  and later, he graduated from McKinley  Vocational Industrial High School.  Vincent's father died  when he was only 10, compelling him to learn a trade at an early age – which enabled him to help support his family – a family living in poverty. 
Following high school, Vincent enlisted in the US Army.
He was very proud of his service to the United States during World War II. He performed Continental service for 2 ½ years stationed at Quartermaster Sub Depot in South Gate California. During his years of service he received commendations for marksmanship, the meritorious unit award, an American Theater of Operations Service Ribbon and a Victory Medal among others. With his service completed, the war at an end, an Army issued train ticket and his mustering-out pay of $100, he headed back to  civilian life in Buffalo.   With the assistance of the G I Bill,  Vincent completed his bachelor's degree at Buffalo State College where he met my Mom. 
They were married on August 27, 1949. This year,  they celebrated their 64th  anniversary. 
Vincent worked at Bell Aerospace for a few years and following that, he began teaching industrial arts for the Niagara Falls Board of Education   -  and soon after completed his Master's Degree.  Eventually Mac and Rosalie had four children, three of us here in church today, myself , Michael and Judy. Sandra spent many weeks here, but had to return to Thailand, her family and children. 
I have so many good memories of my dad that it is  impossible to know where to start. 
During this past week, I searched social media reading all the comments people posted about my dad and  I asked many  people what they remember my dad for.   
They said  they remember him for his stories even if they had hear them more than once.  They remembered his pie baking afternoon with the grand kids , they remembered his inventions– like the bicycle built for four, the life size dinosaur, the pink babysitter, the lap desk,  the diving helmet  complete with an underwater  microphone made from WW II  gas masks. They remembered his stained glass window building era were in he designed , built and installed commissioned works of  glass art. And of course, we recalled his design  and construction of our house on Kiwassa  with the gigantic front windows facing west so that we never missed the sun setting  over the lake.
He was remembered for his day-long fishing expeditions and his quest for the  gigantic pike that  he said carried a sign in it's mouth  that said “Mac Cant  Catch Me. We remembered ice skating in our backyard rink  roller skating at Crystal Beach   bike riding on the canal , his championship beer drinking reputation  and his consumption of endless gallons of ice cream.  I also heard him being  remembered as the official barber  and tooth puller of Capen Blvd,  
He is remembered for tucking in all his kids and grand kids in at night,  and he  loved  huggy-buggy time  And he will always be remembered for celebrating  just about anything with a perfect manhattan, straight up in a chilled martini glass. , 
But more than anything, people told me that my dad made them feel comfortable and he approached everyone as a friend. He was full of love for all of the people here today 
and particularly so for my mother.

Most importantly, we  remember our dad  for his hard work, integrity, and his unending encouragement as we faced life's challenges – the challenges seemed so immense to us, but he would always have 4 or 5 obvious solutions at the ready.
When Mac retired he never stopped learning and teaching.  He researched and published a novel, he taught all of us how to be better people, he taught us to have compassion for and care for those who are less fortunate and he taught us how to be strong independent people. 
With my father's passing, I am  left with  great sadness.  My dad has  always been there for me. He had great insights into the politics of my work, he taught me to gracefully sidestep landmines.
 He taught not to fear change or life's many challenges, including,  ill health, flat tires and  electrical outlets.  He was my confidant, my buddy  -  and always a  very good friend to all of my friends.  

Most importantly to me, 
My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person – he believed in me. 
Dad, I want you to know that even though I will never  see you, call you or hug you again, your memory will live strong. I miss you dearly and you will remain forever in my heart . 
I will close now with a quote from my dad's favorite historical figure, Nicola  Tesla: 
A scientific man does not aim at an immediate result.  He does not expect that his advanced ideas will be readily taken up… His duty is to lay the foundation for those who are to come and to point the way.   
Thank you, Dad. I love you.

Growing up in Oklahoma, my favorite part of the year was going back to Buffalo to visit my grandparents. My favorite memory with my grandpa was one summer when I was staying at their house, with out my parents. I woke up in the middle of the night crying and feeling a little home sick. Grandpa knew exactly what I needed, "2:00 soup!" he proclaimed. After fixing me some soup and giving me a great big 'huggy buggy' I went back to bed. He was right, it was exactly what I needed. 

I have so many wonderful memories with my grandpa. I loved spending time with him and his affinity for ice cream! When I came back in the summers, it was always a guarntee that I'd get ice cream at least once a night!! And if I was lucky, sometimes two!

My Night with Dad
 
While Dad was in hospice, we each took turns sleeping there with him. None of us wanted him to spend a night alone. By the time my turn came up, Dad was beginning to show signs that he was slipping away. At around 11pm, I turned out the lights. He wasn't too happy about it, but I assured him that I was there and we could chat or hug. Within about a half hour he was asleep. And everyone knows when Dad is asleep by the volume of his snores. 

At about 3am Dad woke up saying, "By golly, I just discovered a new world, a parallel universe." He went on to describe what he was experiencing. It was not entirely understandable but he talked about rooms with no walls and the existence of a new dimension without boundaries. Square was no longer square and circles were something entirely different… All this using his scientific mind of course. 

I asked him if he wanted to go visit this new universe and he emphatically said "yes!"  So I told him that I could guide him there but that I wouldn't be able to stay there with him, because it wasn't time for me to go to that world yet.  He replied, "okay, mother dear." 

I told him that all of us were ready for him to go, if he was, but that maybe he wanted to say "goodbye" to the family first. So one by one we said goodbye to every family member. 

He told me that he was going to hold onto the blanket and take one step into the new world. I was lying in bed with him and I could see that he was holding onto something imaginary. Then he was quiet.
and seemed to go to sleep. 

A half hour later, I got up and went into my bed. He immediately woke up, quite agitated, asking me if I could see the walls of the room. He seemed to be confused and scared. He was worried about people coming into the room. There was a little green light at the end of his bed and I told him that as long as we could both see the green light, we would be safe.
 
I kept talking to him reassuring him that we were both safe whether we were in this world or the parallel one that he had just discovered. Then he fell asleep. 

And that was the last time that Dad spoke. So maybe that night, he did pass into a parallel world and waited and watched until he knew we were really ready to let go, and he was, too

I look forward to meeting you in that parallel world and if you have anything to do with constructing it, I am sure it will be a well-built paradise. 

We love you, Dad, and miss you terribly.

I miss you Dad.  It was an honor to give your eulogy at the funeral.  You were very brave those last 4 weeks and we were so frightened. As always, you handled everything with grace, love, dignity and even a little humor.  Thank you for choosing Mom as your bride. You are a great dad.  Thank you, Love, Susan

Mac was a great Father in law anytime I needed to fix something all I had to do was call and he would walk me through it over the phone. Going to miss going for ice cream with him and our philosophical discussions. Good news is we will be seeing him someday on the other side.

I was lucky enough to fall into this family when I was 16. My own father had left years earlier so I found a place of refuge and comfort among the members of the McLean household.

Mac showed me what a father should be - authoritative but kind, forthright but open-minded, stoic but kind - and for this I will be forever grateful. I've considered myself an "honorary" McLean ever since. 

Mac, you will be missed by those whose lives you have touched. I count myself not among the least of them.

Its a funny thing marrying into a family and getting to experience it from the inside. I have, of course, my own complicated and rich experience with the family I grew up with, its history, rituals, memories, and particular dynamics. But its a different thing to put yourself in the middle of another particular combination of history, rituals, memories, dynamics etc and to try to find your own place in it. This is also a question of how one is treated and welcomed, and the McLean family always had a way of putting me at home right in the middle of it.
What can I say, Mac and I got along great. I loved listening to his stories, even when I'd heard them before. Ok, I might have got to hear a few of them several times over, but I never really minded.  We could chat effortlessly and endlessly, and it was always really about the pleasure, the conviviality, of chatting, hanging out, eating, sharing the finer points of the perfectly made Manhattan, dismissing the sorry state of the world and the goofballs who ran it, discussing history, technology, anything. Well, thankfully not sports, that staple of male bonding that fortunately neither of us had to pretend an interest in to keep the conversation going! And we did other stuff together: he tried to teach  me welding and I tried to teach him how to use a computer, both with comically predictable results. But what I will never forget is what it was like to hang out in the living room, feeling pleasantly full from a delicious holiday meal, chatting and passing the time with Mac as the pleasant chaos of family and friends swirled in and around us. It felt like Home, and I will be forever grateful to Mac and the rest of the McLean family for making me a part of it.

Grandpa, I wish I were with you right now telling this to you in person, but I'm not. I just wanted you to know that I love you and I will miss you so much. I'm going to miss our huggy buggy time and sitting by you and dad (my dad) while you drink your manhattans. I miss the time that we had when you used to be able to lift me up near the koo koo clock so that I can wind it up and hear the bird go "koo koo! Koo koo!" I remember that sometimes I would be the clock and you would hang me upside down with Dad and I would love it so much. 34 October Lane isn't going to be the same without you. I know that everyone else may take this as a time to cry and be sad, but I am not going to be sad, I will make sure that this is a time for people to celebrate your life and how you have been such a great son, dad, husband, grandfather, and friend. You are the best grand father in the world and I love you so much.

My father died peacefully. His death was exquisite, like a precious gem. Over the two weeks our family spent together, his gradual passing illuminated life, love, death and the uniqueness of each passing moment 

These are some of the wonderful condolences I received from friends:

Dijana Despodova Pajkovski May he rest in peace. I'm glad you got to see him and say goodbye.

Cate Stratton We should all live life so fully. My thoughts are with you and your entire family. I send much love

Sue Hoppe ah big hugs my friend, bittersweet to suffer the loss yet share the gems, love, and relief

Sahsamol Tanaosri Big hug for you sandra, your daddy he rest t peace, lord will take care of him.

Pippa Mayell Love to you all xx

Tymberly Canale Thinking of you, dear Sandra

Maggie Levine Hugs to you, S.

Bill Pruitt Beautiful tribute, Sandra. He must have been extraordinarily proud of you.

Heather Moors Johnson Love and hugs from the Johnsons. Xoxo

Lucas Ruiz I'm so sorry for your loss Sandra.

Gabriel Garay sorry sandra. I assume that is mom?? Such a sweet pic. Big hug.

Annette Burrell Hugs and lots of love to you and your family, Sandra. xxxooo

Beth Carey he sounds like a wonderful dad. sorry for your loss.

Eliza Beckwith I have such fond memories of your Dad, Sandra. He was a warm, loving father with a great sense of humor. Please give my sympathies to you Mom, and I send you and your whole family a big, embracing hug.

Rhonda Gluckstein Cox Prayers of comfort going out to your family Sandy. You have put his passing so eloquently. May you all be blessed.

Sunil Kumar So sorry for your loss. Condolences and love to you and your family.

Ruchika Mathur Sah So so sorry for your loss. Lots of love to you all Sandra.

Renee Muir My condolences...you spoke of him with such joy always.

Matteo Beltrandi Ciao Sandra....ti sono tanto vicino in questo triste momento....ti faccio le mie condoglianze. Un abbraccio fortissimo

Delia Cooper-Hall Oh Sandra, I am so very sorry for the loss of your father

Rob Zaborny Oh Sandra, so, so sorry. My thoughts and love are with you all.

Mark Goldblatt Sorry to hear this, Sandra. Will keep him in prayers.

Simone Semoli Mi unisco alle condoglianze Sandra una grande abbraccio da tutti noi.

Linda Nafey so sorry, sandra. thoughts and love.

Andrew Mattson He was a great old guy. Best wishes and much love.

Art Chang So sorry about your loss, Sandra! Hope you and the family are well.

Gos Kunecki hi Sandra we are so sorry for your loss ;( Our deepest condolences

Anita Chen I am sorry for your lost. Deepest sympathies.

John V. Lombardo What a sweet tribute. Sorry for your loss.

Max Hoppe Sounds like he was a tremendous guy Sandra. My condolences to you and your family.

Rick Valentine Sorry for your loss.
November 28 at 4:23am · Like

Jorge-Luis Godinez This is a beautiful post! Thanks for sharing these intimate moments that touch us!! My condolences. 
Xoxo
Jl

Priya Shyamsundar Our condolences dear Sandra. He seems to have had the best passing of all. 

Deborah Mcdermott Sending you and your family my deepest sympathy - xo

Mia Ruppert We áre so sorry for your loss.

Barbara Serra-Mannion My thoughts are with you.

Patrick Theresa McElligatt Love and hugs of comfort are sent your way.

Liz Murray Thinking of you xx

John Schenk Saddened to hear of Mac's passing. He was a very kind person, caring and special. He put up with me and showed every kindness. A life well lived.

Susan Stratton Pruitt Great photo of your parents. So glad you could be there together. Sending love

Elizabeth Upton Thinking of you. I'm glad your father's passing was as beautiful as possible. 

Tjasa Owen Beautifully said and felt. I am thinking of you and your family, love tjasa

Nancy Levine Metz So Sorry to here of your dad's passing. I will always have fond memories of him. My condolences to you, your mom and entire family.

Debrah Malater The love survives. In sympathy.

Ewelina Korpulinska SO sorry for your loss:(condolences.

  I still remember the many stimulating and entertaining lunch room conversations with Vince.

  Ron Clippinger - colleague of Vince McLean at Gaskill Jr. High (1964-1984)

Mr. McLean was my 7th grade electric shop teacher at Gaskill Jr. High, years later I started teaching at Gaskill Jr. High in the metal shop.  He was instrumental in giving me tips how to survive my first year of teaching.  He was a great mentor, and a very talented teacher in a many areas.

OBITUARY

Vincent C McLean

16 April, 1922 – 23 November, 2013

Perna, Dengler, Roberts Funeral Home

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