Nancy Kati

In the wee hours of the morning, Nancy was born March 19, 1942, 2:05am at the Grace Hospital. Seems so fitting, as she was always a night owl, or as she would say in German, a Nachteule.

Nancy was the oldest of 4 children born to Sarah and Abram Flaming. It was her, Bill, Ken, then Abe. They have all since passed. Nancy’s Father, passed away at the young age of 29 when Nancy was just 4 years old. This left her to help her mom, known as Grannie at a very young age. The family lived in Winkler, commuting to Winnipeg regularly during the time her Father was ill. Once hospitalized, Grannie rented a room so they could be close to him.

Nancy grew up at the corner of Mountain Avenue and 12th Avenue in Winkler. The home was small, with just one bedroom and the kitchen and living room. Grannie and Nancy would sleep on the fold out chesterfield in the living room, and the 3 boys shared the bed in the bedroom. The house was heated with a wood stove.

When Nancy‘s Father passed away, finances were extremely tight, and Nancy was only 4. She went to school in Winkler, starting in grade one as there was no kindergarten. They had to walk to school and in winter the snow was often as high as the cars. They had no help financially, so Grannie had no choice but to except widows' allowance in order to survive with four small children. Grannie used the governments assistance until Nancy turned 9 at which point, Nancy was old enough to work and look after her three brothers. In fact, Nancy started babysitting her brothers at the age of 7. By the age of 9, neighbors learned that Nancy could be trusted, and she started to earn some money. What money mom made was given to Grannie to help pay the bills. The summer she turned 9, she worked full-time, pulling weeds, thinning out plants in the fields as long as 1 mile. Every summer after that, she was put to work full time, which also included hoeing beets, picking beans and canning. Another of Mom’s jobs was gathering sheep wool to fill the bed comforters.

At a very young age, come summer, she would carry two buckets of water at a time hand pumped from the neighbours well. In the winter, with the use of the wood stove, she melted ice blocks and snow that she carried inside. Once a week on Saturdays, this water was used to bathe and prepare for Church on Sunday. Nancy bathed first, then Bill, Ken, Abe, and lastly Grannie.

Growing up without a Father was Nancy‘s biggest heartache. She felt everyone in Winkler had a Dad, except for her. She would watch the trains come and go and dream about her Father stepping off and greeting her. Unfortunately, that was not the case. They had no outside help financially, but they did have some kind neighbors that helped them with groceries and little things here and there. Their fight to survive made their family bond unbreakable.

In grade 4, Nancy, joined the church and school choir as she really enjoyed singing. Lessons for singing and violin were not something they could afford so she taught herself. One day, the school music teacher requested to test her playing ability and she was accepted into the orchestra where she played first violin for 2 years. Nancy’s Grandfather, Franz Miller, had hand made this violin before he passed. Several years later, the violin experienced some water damage but is still with our family.

Figure skating was Nancy’s true passion. For years she cleaned the ice at the rink just so she could skate for free. A figure skater from Morden often came to Winkler to practice, and each time he was there, she would watch and copy everything he did. She taught herself to skate and at the final competition at the Winkler Rink, Nancy won 1st prize. She ran all the way home to give her mom her prizes, which consisted of a box of chocolates and 10 dollars.

At the age of 11, Nancy wanted ever so badly to go to camp. All the other kids got to go each year, but with Grannie and Nancy living pay cheque to pay cheque, they could ill afford. The church offered to pay for Nancy to go, but there was one stipulation. She had to learn 200 bible verses and she did exactly that. That week at camp was one of her most fondest memories.

A memory Nancy often talked about was of how they had to kill and pluck their own chickens, make their own stock and noodles and then feasted on chicken noodle soup. To this day, it was Nancy‘s favourite meal except the chicken now came in a can.

Nancy had many friends, some to mention are the Nauer girls, Anne Dyck, Margaret Letkeman, Jessie Hildebrand and Marlene Neufeld. Nancy didn’t have a chance to spend a whole lot of time with her friends, as she was working all the time. During the summer holidays, she worked six days a week. During the school year it was after school and on Saturdays. Sunday was always a day for church. Nancy did her best to keep in touch with many of her school friends and was always at each school reunion to catch up, unfortunately some ties were lost along the way.

As Nancy got a little older, and with not being able to afford a TV, Nancy and Grannie used to listen to the radio and sew clothes. Grannie had bought a pedal sewing machine as an electric one was simply unaffordable.

Male cousins clothes were handed down to the boys, while Nancy‘s clothing was homemade from used materials, 100-pound flour sacks as well as sheets and pillowcases. Sometimes Grannie would cut her old dresses and make new ones from them, so Nancy felt like she was getting a new dress. One instance, Grannie was tailoring a dress that Nancy had on, and actually ended up sewing part of her skin! They had a good chuckle.

When Nancy was 15, her mom ordered her a white blouse and aqua skirt from Eaton’s. It turned out to be a red blouse and turquoise skirt. Nancy cried bitterly until Grannie finally agreed to keep it. Even though the clashing colour probably looked funny, Nancy wore that outfit very proudly.

Nancy’s knowledge and talent of sewing led to the opening of her own sewing shop on Dakota Street in Winnipeg in 1972. Little did she know that the love of her life, Arvind was opening his medical practice right next door after immigrating to Canada. Nancy kept her fabric and sewing shop open for a few years, before joining Arvind in his office. She was famous in our family for making our dresses and Hallowe’en outfits. She even made an entire line up of Raggedy Anne dolls for the family. When she closed her sewing business, Nicks bakery opened, and Nancy was found frequently buying treats there. Up to the week she died, Dessert was her favourite meal. In fact, some days, that is all she ate!

Even with the lack of money, Grannie would always decorate the house with simplest, most beautiful decorations. This is what led up to Nancy’s joy for Christmas and her love of lights. At one point, she and Arvind had Manitoba’s largest Christmas display, and the house was decorated both inside and out.

After some courtship, Nancy & Arvind married in 1975 at her brother Abes home, in a perfect small ceremony surrounded by family. The evening of their wedding, they hopped on a plane and left for Maui. Nancy would often say that the highlight of that trip was eating pineapples, and trying to bring them home, and the purchase of a vinyl record called, Tavannah Spectacular. Nancy had adopted Joey 6 years previous, and once married, Arvind did as well. In 1976, Neela was born.

Nancy always instilled hard work on her family. So many talents she possessed were self-taught. She was all about teaching her girls how important it was to share in the household family chores. You could guarantee that every Saturday morning, Tavannah Spectacular was playing on the loudest setting in the living room on the record player stereo. This music was played until we were all out of bed to start our chores in the house.

Work and stability were very important to both Nancy and Arvind, which is why Neela grew up under the reception desk in a car seat rocked by Mom‘s foot while Joey stamped billing cards and filed charts. From there, Nancy & Arvind worked every single day side by side for over 40 years. They shared a common love for helping people, and even the thought of retirement was hard, but in 2017 they finally decided to focus on each other. Throughout their medical journey, they opened and closed a few practices, but Nancy’s favourite was always their Mom and Pop shop as she would call it, in St. Norbert.

She never knew anything different other than working full-time from a very young age. Her mornings were early, driving Joey and Neela to school, then working all day, picking them up, making dinner, maintaining the house, and whatever yard work was needed that day. Somewhere in between all that she could be found watching their basketball, volleyball, track, and musical events. She worked tirelessly to provide for her family from a young age. When she finally retired, she would sleep the day away because she would stay up all night watching tv, often until the sun came up! Neela would come home after work and have to go wake her. When she would ask Nancy why she would sleep all day, her response was always, “because I can”.

Nancy also took a lot of pride in looking after Grannie. They were very close and shared some beautiful memories. Not all were easy, but ones like a road trip to Florida with Grannie as the navigator and Nancy the driver driving down 12 Lane Highways. Grannies' bare feet on the dash and map in hand. All while eating lots of oranges! Grannie passed away in 2008 and the loss was extremely difficult for Nancy to accept.

Nancy lived a full life, and you could find her enjoying the life of her grandchildren through their eyes. They kept her young for some time. She was always up for an adventure with them. She could often be found inside forts and covered in lots of makeup that the kids put on her. Nancy loved to make birthday cakes with coins, until we discovered how unhygienic that really was, but oh such fun.

Although Nancy had a tough start for many years, she made the most of every day. Living life to its fullest with her soul mate of 50 years by her side. Her laugh, her smile, that sparkle in her eye. She lit up a room wherever she went. Her worldly travels with Arvind that allowed them to share stories with all those who listened. The many musicals they attended at MTC. The journey they embarked on, and finished together, they shared a lifetime of happiness. When Arvind passed away in 2022, she constantly longed to be with him, and now they are reunited. Mom, Nana, Nancy, until we meet again.