Scott Martin Spaine

What's Up With You!

It is hard to summarize the many decades with my big brother Scott. Before my arrival, Scott Martin Spaine was born in Louisville, Kentucky to Dorothea K. Spaine and Richard Clifton Spaine, Jr. He was a much-admired baby and preschooler with doting parents. Our grandparents, Cecilia and August John Knarr and Lucy Leake Spaine, adored him and enjoyed his numerous babyhood achievements. I came along three years after Scott. My earliest memories were of all the impressive things that my big brother “Scotty” could do. I wished to emulate him. He could sing, read, ride a bike, perform with puppets, and play with friends. As a youngster, Scott had charisma and lived life joyfully. Scott loved music, showmanship, and as he grew, he became fascinated by magic tricks. At more than one of my childhood birthday parties, Scott provided the entertainment in the form of a magic show. Our grandmothers sewed elaborate magic capes for his performances. As you might imagine, I was sawed in half on several occasions.

As children, we loved movies. We saw the drive-in technicolor movie titled Mary Poppins. Scott had a glossy photo of the actress Julie Andrews on his bulletin board in his 6-year-old bedroom with whom he claimed to be in love. It was the early 1960s, we lived in a mid-century modern home in Carpentersville, Illinois, where we built blanket forts outdoors in the summer and snow forts in the winter with our neighborhood friends. In the early years, our lives revolved around visiting and being visited by our grandparents. We also loved to drive into Chicago to shop (in Scott’s case for magic tricks), see the tall buildings and Lake Michigan. Our parents referred to Chicago as “the city” in a way that we knew it was special.

When Scott was in second grade, his life changed as well as our family dynamic. Scott was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. He became an insulin dependent child. My mother threw herself into learning how to give the daily shot, perform the frequent blood tests, and cook the special diet. In those days, there were few sugar substitutes, so sugar and sweets were banned from our home. My grandmothers experimented with making our favorite family recipes without sugar. We all learned a new routine that included reviving Scott with orange juice when his blood sugar was too low. Other adjustments were made when his blood sugar was too high. The thing is, if you really know Scott, you are already aware that Scott truly loved sweets. So, at Christmas, when our grandmothers baked the traditional sugar cookies, Scott snuck into the kitchen to nibble regularly. Scott broke off and ate a Christmas tree branch, a point off a star-shaped cookie, a leg off a gingerbread man because “it was just a pinch” and somehow didn’t count as a whole cookie from Scott’s perspective. It was challenging to find an intact homemade cookie around the holidays in the Spaine household.

As Scott and I grew up, we had pets, rode bikes, took family vacations in our station wagon, put on little shows in our backyard, and went to school and church. When we moved to DeKalb, Illinois, Scott and I made new friends. Scott took clarinet and guitar lessons. Scott’s magic skills and performances became more elaborate, and his showmanship developed. He’d put on impromptu concerts and shows for our grandmothers and anyone else who would listen. At a young age we both had paper routes to support our many hobbies.

With the advent of Star Trek, Scott was smitten. He tuned in weekly and had a plastic model of the Starship Enterprise in his room. Scott always liked to make a fashion statement and in the middle school years had an orange Edwardian jacket with a medallion to wear to church. He also donned bell bottoms and tie die shirts. As he became an adolescent and on into the later teen years, he had a big black and white poster of Bob Dylan on his bedroom door. He loved the music of Burt Bacharach and the rock band Chicago. He liked to cycle and had a red Schwinn ten speed bike that he could take apart and put back together. He loved to film with his Super 8 camera and made animated movies and other productions. In high school, he developed his passion for journalism with his involvement in the school newspaper. Eventually, this would lead him to his college major and his degree from the University of Wisconsin in Mass Communications. In DeKalb, Scott helped pioneer the then new concept of Public Access TV. At first, he volunteered and later worked at the studio in high school on into college.

The Vietnam War was winding down, but I recall when he registered for the draft. We knew that he wouldn’t be drafted due to his illnesses. Besides diabetes, Scott had kidney issues dating from his teen years. His health was always a concern for our family. Mom was the caregiver and Dad worked out the financial part. However, our mother was determined that we live as normally as possible working around the barriers of Scott’s health. We’d travel with insulin in a cooler to points all over the United States and Canada--the Rockies, California, Niagara Falls, and Montreal--and later to Europe. Put bluntly, Scott loved to travel. Scott always had an agenda for an adventure near or far. He plotted activities with friends like Sven Hanson, Greg Fry, Michael Fitzgerald, and others.

Scott moved to Madison, Wisconsin, to attend university in 1976. After graduation, he relocated to the Washington, DC area and got a job as an entry level TV producer for the County of Arlington, Virginia. He loved it. He was living in an exciting city and doing production work that took him on many interesting assignments. Unfortunately, his upward trajectory was interrupted once again by health problems. Later in his twenties, Scott had the massive stroke. He was diagnosed with lupus, partially paralyzed on his right side, and had aphasia. With the unending support of my parents, he spent much time in rehabilitation. He fought himself slowly back to living semi-independently and then independently in Arlington. He continued to work at the County of Arlington. My parents and I were/are forever grateful to the decent people of the County of Arlington that allowed him ample sick time and redefined his work on numerous occasions to accommodate him. He always felt valued in Arlington.

During Scott’s later 30s and 40s, he lived independently with my parents’ help. He visited us in Alabama and was a doting uncle to my children Morgan and John Richard who remember him fondly. He traveled with my children, husband John and I, and my parents to places like Disney World, Williamsburg, and Seaside. In Arlington, he had many happy times with the HEC group and other friends. He was invited the White House lawn for the signing of the American Disabilities Act in July 1990. He loved telling the ironic story that the traditional punch and cookie reception in the Rose Garden didn’t and couldn’t last long because of lack of accessible bathrooms with the large number of guests in wheelchairs. Scott had a gift for making the best of adverse situations and declared that the “handicapped perks” had allowed him to park near the front door of The Kennedy Center.

When our parents died within a few years of each other, it was difficult for Scott and me. He was determined to stay in Arlington. I lived far away, and our sibling lives became more complicated. Thankfully, Scott had a gift for finding community and keeping friends. As an adult, I see how it sustained him. I am thankful for his friends, in particular Mary Grace who gifted him with boundless support. I am thankful for his wife Yaneth who loved him and took good care of him during his last decade. I am forever grateful to our parents who taught us to pray.

It is hard to say goodbye to the only person with whom you shared your childhood. I choose to remember Scott’s laughter and many gifts. I admired Scott’s ability to celebrate life while surviving one health crisis after another. He channeled his energies toward helping others despite often requiring help himself. Scott was a generous and kind brother. I used to say that when they were handing out the bodies that I got the good one, and he got the dud. I wish Scott eternal peace free of his failing body; I treasure that his spirit lives on.

IN LIEU OF FLOWERS:

Scott loved serving others. In lieu of flowers, donations in Scott's memory can be made to UpperNile Orphans Care Organization (UOCO) www.uoco.org, the orphan school in South Sudan for which Scott and Yaneth have organized bike-a-thons and served with the UOCO Board. Also encouraged are donations to Little Friends for Peace, where this remarkable couple have shared their love of biking as one fun environmental solution www.LFFP.org. Or, please feel comfortable donating to the charity of your choice.

Cards can be sent to Amelva Yaneth Spaine at:

Yaneth Spaine

5426 8th Rd S

Arlington VA 22204