Shirley was one of the kindest people I have ever met.  I can't think of a single time when she was not cheerful, even as she went through health issues.  She was a great friend to my Mom for decades.  She is s deeply missed.  I've attached a photo of my Mom and Shirley having lunch.  I think this was the last time they saw each other.

On one of my many visits to the Blacher house when I was in college, I was greeted by Uncle Leo, who related with considerable amusement that he had just asked,  "Shirl, what's it all about?", and she had casually replied, "You're born, you live, you die."  The only one of those we have much control over is how we live, and she was an example of one who knew how to do that most admirably.

I reflect often on the many kindnesses she showed me, and the fun times we had together, dating from my earliest years.

She had a frequent, brief piece of advice if we were hesitating over a whimsical purchase or a second piece of cake.  "Live it up," she would say, and Susan and I, laughing, often quote it to each other, and remember her, her good humor and enjoyment of life, and try to follow her example.


Whenever I think of Shirley, I will remember her huge smile and the hint of mischief in her eyes! Thinking of all her family and sending loving condolences.
Evalyn 

I met “Mrs. Blacher” when Betsy and I chose to be roommates in our sophomore year at Wheaton College, but I met “Shirley” when she and I became roommates ourselves for a time in the mid-1980s.  How cool it was to develop our own friendship that transcended generations.  We were women who created memories together by sharing stories, and laughs, and even occasional tears.  She was a dear friend who helped me come of age.  Wise, witty, wonderful, and ever humble, Shirley Blacher was a lovely lady.

I had the privilege of meeting Mrs. Blacher several times during college, and after, as I was good friends with her daughter, Betsy. What a lovely, gracious, woman she was; her generous spirit always came through, and one always felt special in her presence. I met many moms of college friends, but Mrs. Blacher (that's what we called her) is truly one I've always remembered. My thoughts and prayers are with her family at this time.

I have excellent memories of Shirley especially during college when Betsy and I would escape to Melrose for the weekend. She always included the signature Baskin and Robbins cake for the perfect end to dinner in the dining room. She had such a optimistic life attitude. Later, after moving to Seattle, Mason kept me in touch with her by including me on some of his phone calls with her. She was consistently gracious with all the right social skills. Rest In Peace Shirley, your were a terrific family member, mother and friend to many.   


At this point in our society, the words ‘funeral’ or ‘services’ have been replaced by such euphemisms as ‘celebration of life.’  Shirley Blacher’s life on this Earth was always a celebration while she was alive; and so it is in her passing.  Our Mom, a classic mid-Twentieth Century housewife, was very special to her family and friends, and to everyone in her life.

The daughter of an athlete who turned down an offer from the Boston Red Sox in favor of the more remunerative (in those days) profession of grocer.  Fond of Tootsie Rolls from her parents’ grocery, she was known as ‘Tootie,’ and even signed greeting cards to friend, ‘2T.’  To my cousins she was known as ‘Auntie Tootie’.

Mom was herself known for her athletic prowess, whether on the tennis court or the ski slope. I inherited none of this from her, nor did I inherit her youthful interest in taking flying lessons or (would you believe it?) becoming a mortician.

What I did inherit was my chosen profession of philanthropy.  Every couple of months one of the ladies in her canasta club would foist upon the others a folder with brochures and pledge cards for one charity or another – Heart Fund, Cancer Society, Red Feather (precursor to the United Way), or whatever – asking each fellow card-player to solicit the neighbors.  (Dad’s Kiwanis Club also expected him to sell 100 raffle tickets at $1/each, which was a tidy sum in the early 1960’s.)

I was expected to mow the lawn, but hay fever, and possibly laziness, were serious allergies; so my parents, mainly Mom, happily mowed the lawn for me…and (as I tell Rotary Clubs and other speaking venues) I haven’t done an honest day’s work since.  

Always volunteering to do the grunt work in the organizations for which she volunteered, she chose not to run for higher office, preferring instead to serve (or, as the motto of Rotary International states, ‘Service Above Self,’ as my sister Betsy and I , each Past Presidents of Rotary, can attest.)



(Continued, because the website wouldn't accommodate full thoughts)

She never asked for favors, nor did she want to ‘impose’ for even the smallest favors on friends who would happily have helped her in any number of ways.

All of us children inherited her values, even as we succeeded in our careers – me in philanthropy, Jan(et) in academia, Betsy in public finance; my nephews extraordinarily successful.  It was enough for Mom to be quietly proud of us without bragging about her children’s  (or grandchildren’s) accomplishments.

Many drives back to the Framingham homestead were accompanied by singing Framingham College on the Turnpike…something that might have stumped Doc Severinsen’s band, as I haven’t found it on google or YouTube (but maybe Framingham State archives can help).

Here’s Mom’s other favorite song that we also sang on the road, The Prune Song:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i7u0CzX9USo    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5heVeZZQIg0

Mom never had a fear of death. On the contrary, she feared surgeries and other extraordinary efforts like colonoscopies.  She took things as they came, always prepared for ‘what comes next.’

In the last couple of years - particularly this one, having taken special effort to spend a couple of days with her at a time – I am comforted by the fact that I have been with her in these final months.

Had she not had dementia, she might have remembered to push the button on her plastic necklace to summon the aide to help her to the bathroom in the middle of the night last Monday November 1st.  Instead, she chose to walk by herself and fell and broke her hip which, a month prior to her 97th birthday, was not a feasible surgery and would have been contrary to the what she would have wanted – she was never inclined to permit other surgeries - so she was kept comfortable for the five remaining days of her life and passed away quietly on Saturday, November 6th.


I will always remember Shirley as one of my favorite residents at Brooksby Village.  I often think of her and how I kept her coffee cup bottomless.  She was always so grateful for anything I did for her.   Rest In Peace my dear friend Shirley. ❤️
    My deepest sympathy to her family
             Love Sue P

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