We at Carelife Cedar House will miss Kam Sue. We remember her lovely smile and wonderful personality. We think of her often and her lovely and caring family.                           Friends and staff at Carelife Fleetwood

Hilton, we are sorry to hear about the passing of your grandmother.  She sounds like an amazing woman  with a very eventful life.  Her story is amazing.  It is a blessing that you have so many wonderful memories of her.  Our thoughts are with you and your family.  Love, Tony and Kathy Gill

My grandmother, Kam Wan Sue, was born on September 2, 1919 in Panyu, Guangdong, China and had quite a life.  By the time she was 16, she was married.  By the time she was 20, she was a mother.  By the time she was 24, she was both a widow and a grieving parent (having lost both her husband and one of her two sons to wartime events).  By the time she was in her 40s, she was living in Guyana (South America) and had become a grandmother.  By the time she passed away on April 9, 2010 at the age of 90 in Surrey, BC, Canada, she had lived on 3 different continents and was survived not only by her oldest son, but also four grandchildren, four great-grandchildren, and many other family members and friends.

My grandmother lived a long, full life, spanning 90 years and 3 continents, but I actually grew up not knowing many details of her life before she came to Canada because she never really talked about it, at least not with me.  But let me tell you what I do know (and have always known) about my grandmother:

I know my grandmother was very kind and thoughtful, very considerate of the feeling of others and always thinking of others before herself.

I know my grandmother was very independent.  She didn’t drive, but she had no problem walking or taking the bus wherever she’d want to go.  She was able to take care of herself most of her life, and in her later years chose to live on her own until she was 89.

My grandmother was very strong and active.  She loved to spend time working on her huge vegetable garden (and I mean huge), and she loved going on walks.  She seemed to be able to eat anything without ever getting sick.  And she always seemed fearless and able to take on anything, and rarely complained about anything.
   
But just because she would and could eat anything doesn’t mean she didn’t enjoy food, both eating and cooking it.  She loved to go out to eat, especially things like all-you-can-eat sushi.  She also liked to cook, and I remember fondly many weekends helping her make dumplings or rice rolls from scratch, and every time a special occasion came up, I remember her spending many hours making her famous pork dish.  I don’t think she minded all the work making those dishes, because everyone got involved in helping out and it became a big social occasion for her.

My grandmother was very social and very outgoing.  She loved to socialize with friends and go on many excursions.  I remember her going to take English-as-a-second-language lessons, but I think she took them mainly so she could socialize with the other students – becoming more fluent in English was an afterthought.

My grandmother enjoyed children and, in addition to her own grandchildren, she helped take care of other children, like some of my cousins.  I think she became a “grandmother” of sorts to many more people than her actual 4 grandchildren and 4 great-grandchildren.  

I think the last few months of my grandmother’s life were challenging for her because, as her body started failing her, she was losing many of the things that made her who she was for almost 90 years – her strength, her independence, her ability to socialize, and her ability to enjoy food.  But she still cared more about us than she did about herself, and often at the end of visits, she told me not to spend time worrying about her.  And despite the challenges facing her, I rarely heard a complaint from her until near the very end (which was heartbreaking, because it could only mean that she was really, really suffering); overall, I was struck by just how positive a person she was and remained.  I can only hope that, if I find myself in the same situation, I can find within myself even half the strength, selflessness, and positive attitude that my grandmother has shown all her life, all the way to her final days. 

In memory of my grandmother, I prepared a video montage showing snapshots of her life.  If you click the "play video" button on the right of her memorial at www.legacy.com and watch it, I think you’ll be able to see in my grandmother many of the personality traits I just mentioned and you can remember her as I do.

Goodbye grandma – your failing body will no longer restrain your amazing spirit.  We’ll miss you dearly, but you’ll forever be in our hearts.

Your grandson, Hilton

OBITUARIO

Mrs. Kam Wan Wong Sue

2 septiembre, 1919 – 9 abril, 2010

Forest Lawn Funeral Home & Memorial Park

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