Shmekia Daneane Brender

Shmekia accepted Christ at an early age at New Caldonia Baptist Church in Rockwall Texas. After moving to Dallas with the family she joined New Mt. Zion Baptist Church. She remained steadfast in her faith as a young adult and was a member of Kenneth Copeland Ministries and later Gateway Church.

Shmekia graduated from Bryan Adams High School, Dallas TX in 1995. While attending Bryan Adams Shmekia took courses in fashion design, interior design and modeling. Early in her career she traveled with her hairstylist to model fashions and gorgeous hairstyles. Her love and eye for fashion was shown in her home decorating, apparel and vast shoe collection. Combining colors and fabrics was astonishing and what she did best. Shmekia had a laugh that was contagious and exuded pure joy. If you heard her laugh, you would surely want to know what was soo funny and laugh with her.

In 2004, Shmekia married the love of her life, Steven. They both enjoyed the best of fine dining, classical music, shopping and weekend drives to different cities in DFW. Shmekia and Steven both enjoyed watching HGTV, Fixer Upper and many home remodeling shows. They were inseparable until death. Later in life, Shmekia attended Samford Brown Technical College. She received her credentials and became a licensed certified pharmacy technician. She was employed with CVS Caremark for 12 years.

Shmekia leaves to cherish her memories, husband (Steven Brender)Flower Mound, TX , parents Sharolyn(Keith Woodard)Garland TX, Bill(Joyce Scroggins)Rockwall TX, siblings, Derrick, Kentrell, Brandie, Toni, Jay, Danielle and a host of nieces, nephews, other relatives and friends.

A visitation for Shmekia will be held Saturday, November 2, 2024 from 1:00 PM to 2:00 PM at Bluebonnet Hills Funeral Home, 5725 Colleyville Blvd, Colleyville, TX 76034. A funeral service will occur Saturday, November 2, 2024 from 2:00 PM to 3:00 PM, 5725 Colleyville Blvd, Colleyville, TX 76034. A committal service will occur Saturday, November 2, 2024 from 3:00 PM to 3:30 PM, 5725 Colleyville Blvd, Colleyville, TX 76034.

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Eulogy of Shmekia Brender by her Husband Steven Brender, 11.02.24

I want to start by apologizing to anyone here who, at some point over the last six-plus months, I mistakenly told that May 15th of this year was our 19th wedding anniversary. Having been recently corrected on this matter, and more than a little chagrined, it turns out this year was actually our 20th anniversary. Had Meka been able, she would no doubt have sternly corrected me at my first infraction. However, given the stress I was under at the time, perhaps I can be pardoned for this most husband-like of mistakes, and take some solace in at least getting the date right. And that anniversary date of May 15th came almost five weeks after the sudden and devastating stroke she suffered out of nowhere on the evening of April 9th of this year, for which great Providence was necessary for me to be at home with her as it happened, when I very nearly was not.

But the tragedy of the stroke is not what I want to spend my limited time here talking about, though I will inescapably have somewhat more to say of it before I am through. Instead, I want to focus on the admittedly impossible task of communicating and celebrating her as the person I knew, not through 19, but through 20 years of marriage. Obviously, time does not permit for two decades worth of anecdotes and stories, so I must speak in generalities.

First, and perhaps foremost, it must be known that she was an intensely private person, as was I. We both arrived at this characteristic for reasons of life experience and personality that were similar in nature, if not in exact detail, and I believe this characteristic was fundamental to our similar view of the world and to our longevity together, despite whatever other difficulties we may have had. As an example, to this day neither of us ever had a social media account of any kind, finding unappealing the idea of documenting every moment of our lives for the whole world to see forever, preferring instead to live daily in need of little else than each other. Not that there’s anything wrong with documenting one’s life on social media, necessarily. It just certainly was not for us. And in this, we were both happy, for better or worse. I must mention here that over the last six months of this ordeal I’ve had to learn a new sense of openness that I probably never would have come about otherwise, as there have been countless people, in countless ways, whose generosity and help I never would have made it through this without. To each of you, many of whom are here today, I am forever grateful. But I digress.

Related somewhat to her private nature were her uncompromising standards for the quality of life she did, and did not want for herself. She developed these standards early in life, as she would tell me the story, and from these standards she would never waiver. She always wanted the best of everything, and was always resistant to anything perceived as a compromise. This was a quality that I admired, even when early in our marriage we made plenty of mistakes attempting to realize those desires. And even when we moved into our first, and ultimately our only house in Flower Mound, a very nice place indeed, and after many years of looking, one of the first things she told me was that this was not her forever house, and I knew exactly what she meant. It was always her dream to live in one of the beautiful neighborhoods of Southlake or something similar, and while we never made it there, I feel blessed to now be able to give her a final resting place literally next door to where she dreamt of living.

Supporting her lifelong desire for the best in life was her strong faith in God and her belief that as a loving Father He wanted the best in life for His children as well. Again, this was a belief that I shared, and was ultimately the reason we first met as we did in church and in the ministry we both worked for at the time. Like her uncompromising desire for the best in life, her uncompromising faith was an equally defining characteristic of her being, and equally unwavering. I must again mention here that, as paradoxical as it may seem, I can look back and see the hand of a loving God at work throughout the last six month. Not that the tragedy of her stroke should be imputed to His will, but that even in the midst of such a tragedy the hand of Providence can be seen in countless ways, working all things out for good in a way that only God is capable of doing. And, again, to all the people who were involved in that process, knowingly or not, I thank God for each of you.

Now anyone who knew Meka is generally aware of what I’ve said so far. But here are a few things that may be less well known. In the last eight years in particular, she developed a strong love of her country, which was born out of her love for God. She came to realize and appreciate that the ideals that formed the foundation of our nation were ultimately inspired by God, and that those ideals can be, and should be a force for good and for God’s will in the world. This is something she fervently prayed for and supported. She also loved classical music, and one of her favorite things to do -- when not shopping of course -- was for us to go out for breakfast on a weekend, then spend the afternoon driving leisurely around her dream neighborhoods while listening to the local classical radio station, looking at the beautiful yards and getting ideas for our own house. These were some of my favorite times as well. And as high as her standards were for the quality of life she desired, she took the most amazing joy in the simplest and purest of pleasures. She would get so tickled at times over hearing about God’s blessing in someone’s life, especially where innocent children were concerned, with a laughter that would literally light up the room. These will be some of my favorite memories of her.

Of course, she was not perfect. Neither was I. Neither were we. But whatever were our shortcomings, and whatever were the things in life we wanted but never achieved, the details of which will forever remain between husband and wife, we were faithful to each other for 20 years, which is something that not everyone gets to experience. That is something for which I will be forever thankful, and which I will forever treasure. She was my best friend, and she gave me the best years of my life, and if not for the tragedy of the stroke that ultimately took her life, both quantitatively and qualitatively, it would have been my privilege and honor to have spent another 20 years with her. And of the stroke, I will now lastly say this.

Just as I believe it was Providence that had me to be with her at home when the stroke happened in April, I believe it was also Providence that got me up, just in time, in the middle of the night to be with her and hold her hand as she took her last breath over six months later on October 21st. It was a profoundly peaceful experience, without any struggle, with an equally profound sense that she was going to a much better place, surrounded by those who have gone before, and now waiting for all of us who were part of God’s Providential work throughout.

With that, I know of no better way to close. There is, of course, much more that could be said, which I would be glad to discuss individually with anyone. As my heart is broken in ways that will probably take me the rest of my life to sort through, it has also been touched by God through the kindness of many people that will also last the rest of my life.

Sweetheart, I love you, I miss you dearly, and I will see you soon. We will all see you soon.