Joel Sparber

Good Morning Everyone, and thanks so much for being here today. Man, it feels like we were just here doing this. I am truly heartbroken right now, so you may have to bear with me, but I am so incredibly honored to speak about my dad today.

He provided lots of material, right up to his last moments, so I hope no one is in a rush.

When I was thinking about what to say today, I could not help but reflect on the different stages my Dad’s life went through, and how often times, it meant transforming and growing. In addition, if there was one thing that typified my Dad’s life, it was that he wanted everyone to have fun, and enjoy every experience, and he would often take the lead in making that experience memorable. So that will be the theme of my remarks today.

My Dad grew up in Brooklyn. He had great memories of his youth. He did not have any brothers or sisters, but lived across the street from his Aunt and uncle, who had three children, his cousins who he remains very close with to this day. He told me of the days where he would play stick ball with his cousin Alan, and go out into Sheepshead Bay with a long pole with a bunch of hooks, no bait, and bring back I think it was whitefish to their grandmother who would put them in the bathtub before preparing them later that evening.

As a child, the Boy Scouts played a huge role in Fathers life. He took many great trips, and learned his love of the outdoors thru this great organization. He achieved the highest honor a boy scout could achieve, reaching the level of Eagle Scout, something he was incredibly proud of. Once you are an Eagle Scout, you are an Eagle Scout for life and he took that responsibility very seriously. This was the beginning of the nickname that we all know and love so well “Indiana Joel”

He was also an excellent shot, and was the leader of his HS Rifle team…yes, that was a thing. I can just see him now, walking down the streets of Brooklyn on his way to school, his back pack on one shoulder and his rifle slung over the other shoulder. Imagine that today 😊.

Moving along in my Dad’s life, he met a drunk woman in the catskills and wound up marrying her. That story was told in my prior engagement so no need to retell. My mom and Dad were living in an apartment in Trump Village in Brooklyn…how a propos is that? Anyway, my Dad decided he wanted to live in a house, not an apartment, and without telling any of the parents or my mother, bought a house in Farmingdale, three houses down from the Blutsteins who would go on to be cherished friends and family to this day.

A few years later, he moved the family to Massapequa, where he raised his family, made many good friends, and became very involved as a little league coach, and eventually was made president of the local PAL chapter. This volunteer work was my first insight into his unwavering desire to ensure memorable experiences for all.

The years went by, my sister and I graduated, made our lives, and then it came time to figure out where to retire to. They decided to move to Eastport. My dad told me the other night it was the best decision they ever made. Barbeques, dinner parties, and Texas Hold em games became a staple. I was fortunate enough to see one of the Texas Hold em games in action a few weeks ago, and saw the camaraderie and fun that the game generated. Anyone here that was there that night? Cant remember who came in 1st, can someone tell me? I have not been invited back coincidentally enough.

Anyway, that is the chronology, but there were so many great memories and stories along the way. My Dad loved the outdoors, as noted earlier. My favorite memories are traveling to different lakes in NY State as a kid, spending time on lakes, and figuring out 8 million ways how not to catch fish. My dad would pull out a lure from the tackle box, tell me about all of the great fish he has caught with that one. I of course would be skeptical, and say “Dad, I have been fishing with you for years, never saw you catch anything with that one.” As we got older, those trips morphed into group trips. 1992, we invited Tom Keane and Mike Shene on a canoe trip down the Delaware river where we fished and lived off the land. I will never forget, after a day of not catching fish, Tom and Mike were worried about what we were going to eat that night. Indiana Joel pulls out the following line “An Eagle Scout always comes prepared” pulled out a few freeze dry packages from his back pack, boiled some water and instantly had spaghetti and meatballs. We ate like kings.

That trip became his yearly pride and joy. 2002 a bunch of us went to Canada. The stories and memories from that trip, and all of the trip that followed are endless. The one common theme, Indiana Joel, and his partner in crime, Harvey Greenberg organizing everything for months, making sure meals were planned, and itineraries were perfect so that everyone on his watch had a great time.

We have a plaque in the house in Otisville highlighting every one of these trips, right up to the one we just took this past June. I will treasure those trips, and I hope they can continue in his honor.

One other trip I would like to highlight, in the summer of 2019, My Dad, Matt, Ryan and myself took a trip of a lifetime to fish in Alaska. No words can do justice to that trip, and my Dad was ecstatic at the result. One day, we went out fishing for Halibut, which can get up to 50, 60 pounds. My Dad hooked into a fish, and had to work for about a half hour to reel it in. At one point, Matt asked me if he should help my Dad. My response was that if you reach for that pole, you better be prepared to lose an arm. No way Indiana Joel was giving up that rod, and sure enough, a few minutes later he brought up a 45 pound Halibut. Unbelievable memories.

My Dad was blessed with many great relationships. His relationship with Marc and Linda, Lenny, Lydia and Barbara was truly special.

My sister Carolyn and my Dad had a very special relationship. When I did this a few months back for my Mom, I “joked” about who was the favorite child. Now, clearly I was Mom’s favorite, but Dad, I am not so sure. The bond they had was a sight to see. From childhood thru the years where they worked together, that was a special relationship indeed.

When Randi and Matt came along everything changed. It definitely gave him two more people to call his children.

My Mom and Dad were married for 57 years. No two people could have been more devoted to each other. They truly embodied what marriage was supposed to be, good times, and bad times, they were always there for each other, and were great role models for all of us.

Then there are the grandchildren. My sister tells a story where she was prepping Matt that my Dad was not going to be the touchy feely grandpa. He is not a baby person, he is not going to be the one to roll around on the floor with a baby, etc. One day when Ryan was about a week old, Carolyn and Matt left Ryan with Mom and Dad for a few minutes while they took a walk. When they came back, Ryan was sleeping right on Dad’s chest. This was where Indiana Joel was transformed into Grandpa Joel. His relationship with his grandkids was obvious to anyone who got to see them together.

I could be here all night telling stories about my Dad, and it still would not do him justice. I am leaving out so much, I will post the full version online – Indiana Joel and the crusade to rid the world of the radical left.com …. all his pearls of wisdom.

I will leave you with this.

They say a man’s true character is exposed when he is faced with adversity. Like every human being, my Dad faced his share of challenges. In the mid 80’s, my Dad’s business experienced difficulties and he eventually lost the business. Rather than put his tail between his legs, he reinvented himself, and his business, and developed a very successful shoe store which he joyfully ran with my sister for many years. I true exhibition of perseverance and determination that resonates so strongly with me today.

Another example of adversity was the passing of my Mom back in January. My Dad was heartbroken by the loss. Instead of wallowing in sadness, he reinvented himself yet again, and embraced the challenge of living alone. He travelled, hosted barbeques ( I heard the Labor Day BBQ a week and a half ago was legendary), and genuinely got back to enjoying life.

The last piece of adversity took place only three days ago when the doctor informed him that there was nothing they could do to help him medically. After having the science explained, all my Dad said was “OK”. No anger, no woe is me. He just picked up his phone and began calling people close to him to say goodbye. It was quite frankly, the most horrifying and at the same time, beautiful thing I have ever seen.

So Dad, I say to you, find yourself a nice lake and a good golf courses where I wish you tight lines and clear fairways. You did good Pop.