Called to Peace October 11, 2019, Kamloops BC
Survived by his true love forever and wife of 60 years Josephine; his children David, Gary (Marla), Wayne (Tracy), Lana (Keith), Mark (Denise), Peter (Danica), and Patrick.
Missing their Dido are his treasured grandchildren Milen, Noah, Jack, Lucas, Vincent, Joshua, Jaden, Jolene, Alysha, Ryan and precious great granddaughter Dorothy.
Also leaves to mourn his brother Joe (Joan), sister-in-law Jessie, and many other family members including his cherished nieces, nephews, and cousins in Ukraine.
Predeceased by his infant son Michael, his parents Tekla and Harry, Josephine's parents Anna and Lorenz, brothers Nick and Jack, his sister Jennie, in-laws Mary, Metro, Anne, Balzar, and Lorenz.
Prayers will be recited 7 PM Wednesday, October 16th, at Our Lady of Perpetual Help Church Kamloops, BC. Funeral mass will be celebrated 11 AM Thursday, October 17th, at Our Lady of Perpetual Help Church, with interment to follow at Hillside Cemetery.
He was a blessing of a man whose love for his family and friends was limitless and endlessly given.
He could not be more proud of all his family and could not be more loved or missed.
So Much Love
In Our Hearts Forever
"Prayer of St. Francis"
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be
consoled as to console,
to be understood as to understand,
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive,
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
St. Francis of Assisi
"The Lord’s Prayer"
Our Father, who art in heaven,
Hallowed be thy Name.
Thy kingdom come.
Thy will be done,
On earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses,
As we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
But deliver us from evil.
For thine is the kingdom,
and the power,
and the glory,
for ever and ever.
Amen
"Eulogy"
We are gathered here because we have lost our Dad, Peter Harry Topolewski. We will mourn and miss him forever, but today we will celebrate who he was and who he will always be to us.
All of us here know at least some of Dad's remarkable qualities. His generosity, his humor, his tenacity. But if you tallied all his traits, they don't add up to what he meant to Mom, us, his friends, and his loved ones. There's no measuring who he was, but today we can grasp at least some of why he was such a giant of a man to all of us.
Dad was born in Renwer Manitoba, the son of Tekla and Harry, and the kid brother to Nick, Jack, Joe, and Jennie. On their farm he learned humility, how to work hard, and how to play hard. He wasn't alone in being born on the Prairies, in learning valuable lessons there, or in being proud of his hometown. But when God lit the light of Dad's soul in Renwer, he made sure it burned extra bright.
Dad was blessed by God with an incredible will, a focus on the needs of others, and a heart filled with love for those around him. What made him most special, however, was how he chose to use those gifts.
Maybe those choices were inspired by his deep but quiet faith. If you heard him cussing at a bolt that wouldn't come loose you might not know it or realize, but he talked and prayed to God a lot.
Dad's great will showed itself most prominently in his work.
We can all picture Dad working. That's what he loved to do. He could fix anything. And it seemed that at one time or another he fixed everything – including each one of the more than 50 cars he'd bought over the years.
When working, nothing was impossible to Dad. Whether it was for friends, family, or customers, if you needed something built or fixed, he was on it. Skateboard rails, washing machines, a bulldozer. For him, each was a challenge, and making them work and look sharp with a new paint job gave him such pleasure.
If no one had something for him to work on, he dreamed up his own projects. He had a natural talent for building and fixing things. He didn't have an engineering degree, but he was so inventive that one look at his creations – with blueprints typically on a napkin – you'd assume that he did.
Many of these project details and challenges were addressed in his sleep, and you could watch his hands working on them through the night. When he woke, he'd be so pleased that he had the problem solved.
He saw every project through to the end, done and done right, no matter if it took him an extra week. He chose to be a perfectionist, and because of that he was proud – quietly proud – of his work.
Dad was so strong, stronger than anyone would guess to look at him. He had big powerful hands. Every one of our friends has commented how his hands told his story. At times in the last few years when Dad was sick and any one of us had held his hands as some small comfort, we'd marvel at how little our fingers still felt in his hands, and wonder: what's up with that? While he might have felt weak in recent years, he never lost the strength in his hands.
As strong as he was outside, he was stronger inside. We saw it every day and got used to it. But looking back no one could think of an instance he made an excuse. He was never too tired, or too sick, or too hung over to get a job done.
Often, at BC Sandblasting, getting that job done meant dragging us along, who sometimes – often – were too tired or hung over. But in doing so he became our hero. He chose to work till it hurt, even if it affected his health in the long run. He chose never to complain. When Dad was sick, even just weeks before he passed, he still didn't make excuses. He got on his stationary bike and peddled his hardest to get back into working shape.
Dad's will was matched by his kind heart. His focus was outward, his thoughts on others first and last, a trait he inherited from his parents. His generosity wasn't always matched by his fashion sense, as he showed with some of the sweaters he bought us for Christmas. And he didn't always have the best sense of occasion, such as the time he bought Mom an oven for their anniversary. But he gave, sometimes to a fault. He automatically fed any dog near the table, and he instantly gave in to and supported his kids' wildest ideas: restoring an old Ford van, three times; letting Wayne live in a camper on the driveway; going to the U.S. for university; marrying into families crazier than our own.
And he never spent a nickel on himself unless it was for tools. Then there was no budget.
Dad was most generous with those in need. He showed this spirit when he offered to pay for the headstone of a recently departed friend. When he insisted, even when he was gravely ill himself, on donating to a fundraiser for a family friend with cancer. And, as his brother Nick reminded us, when he provided our cousins the first hugs and the first shoulders to cry on, when their mom, his sister Jennie, passed away.
This spirit, these choices and thousands more like them, earned Dad a hug fan club in heaven and on earth.
So too did the last quality that set him apart: his huge loving heart. He followed his parents' example. He sent that love right back to them, and to his siblings and all his family. Our cousin Barb thanked him specifically for forging the ties between our extended family across BC and the prairies, bonds that we are forever grateful for.
But his love truly found a focus and a home after probably the most important moment in his life: when he met Mom.
They just celebrated 60 years of marriage and of love. Mom was from the start and forever the owner of Dad's heart. He was proud to be madly in love with her and proud to show it. Their love didn't remove challenges from their lives, but it never wavered and it sustained them through the toughest of times. And amazingly, they grew more in love every year.
Mom inspired Dad. She put a smile on his face and made his foot a little heavier on his drives home from the shop or jobs out of town.
With Mom he created a family. David, Gary, Wayne, Lana, Mark, Michael, Peter, and Patrick. He was so proud of us, to the point we sometimes didn't understand. But he never bragged. He loved to be with Mom and us, especially on trips to places like Alaska, Crazy Horse, Bali, China, Ukraine, London, and many more.
When Dad was sick just over a year ago, and the doctors didn't have much hope for him, Dad didn't think of himself, he thought of his family. It wasn't fair, he said. If he died, we would just lose him. But he would lose all of us.
Against the odds, he pulled through that time. It was thanks to the grace of God, his sheer will to avoid the pain of losing us, and his love for Mom.
It was always Dad's plan that he would never leave Mom alone. In his heart, right until he died, he held up his part of the bargain. But his body could not. As he fought for what felt like the millionth time, he talked about jobs he still had to do – including finishing some he'd started just a few months earlier. His voice weakened, yet he told us that he didn't want to leave us, that he had the greatest family.
Near the end he said he should be tougher, that he should be stronger. Still, his faith and his will never faltered. He kept fighting. But God had a slightly different plan, and on Friday morning called Dad home to peace.
Dad, through his will and his love, did get one wish that he so rightly deserved. The last thing he saw of this world was his beautiful wife, and it was looking into Mom's eyes that he took his last breath and passed away peacefully.
Dad left us with his strength, which all together we might match, and an example that we'll strive to live up to.
But our world won't be the same without him.
He had so much love, and he gave it all away.
For now, we can say thank you to him, and to God for blessing us with him in our lives.
Though we mourn his absence today and tomorrow and tomorrow, we take comfort in his unending love, the love he inspired in others, and in knowing that our separation is a pause before we meet again.
Dad lit up lives with his smile, his charm, his humor, and his giving heart. Dad was such a bright light.
It helps to know he is in with heaven with his parents, his son Michael, and many beloved relatives and friends.
COMPARTA UN OBITUARIO
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