It is with profound sadness that I share with you the death of Evan George Henry (Butch) Stockham on August 17, 2019 at the University of Ottawa Heart Institute in Ottawa. Over these last six months Butch had fought so hard to live, and although very sick at times, he was so brave and willing to do whatever was required of him to have a chance of recovery. But ultimately he was failed by the very medical system that was supposed to aid him, coming home after his open heart surgery on February 13 at St Boniface Hospital/Asper Institute in Winnipeg with not one, not two, but three hospital acquired infections. To the very end he fought, and given a last chance for very high risk corrective surgery in Ottawa, he went for it, still fighting for life. However after many, many hours during four surgeries in Ottawa, there was nothing else that could be done for Butch and he quietly slipped away on Saturday.
Evan was born on 9 May 1941 in Kenora, given the nickname Butch at as a toddler by an aunt. He was the son of Ivor and Irene (née Perron) Stockham but raised by his dad from childhood when his mother left the marriage. Although he learned in later life that Ivor was not his biological father, it mattered not a whit to him, and he loved him all the more for standing by him. Butch left high school early, lured by a good paying job at Lindstrom and Nilson, but would later earn his high school diploma as well as other accounting certificates. Over the years he also pipelined, worked at R and T as a cook, for Cederwall Landscaping, for TransCan Homes, the Department of Highways, the Town of Kenora Jail office, and for many years for the Town of Kenora in Accounts up until his retirement in 2000. Following retirement he worked a part time job doing bookwork for Doug Rushfeldt at Chipman Street Husky, probably his most enjoyable job in his working life, the Rushfeldts becoming adopted family.
In 1987 Butch and I were introduced by mutual friends, Phil Hanstead and Susan Finnsson. We were both unattached after previous marriages, and following a whirlwind romance, six months later we were married on December 12th, with Phil and Susan as the witnesses. Sure there were some rocky times in the marriage, but the love and commitment were always there, with the marriage growing stronger and stronger as time went by. Unfortunately it was not in the cards for us to have children, but we were determined to make a full and enriched life for ourselves without them, and we did. With the onset of his health issues dating back to 2009, Butch was always more worried about me than he was about himself, right up until going into surgery this last time, that’s just the kind of fellow he was.
In his younger days Butch played hockey as well as baseball. He was perhaps best known for his great sense of humour and the ability to make others laugh, and his very fine art of bs-ing as egged on by others during his morning coffee group at McDonalds as well as at other local businesses in town that he would drop in for visits. He was also known for his fascination with the acquisition of gadgets, and of course for his love of Ford trucks. A truly loyal Dingwall customer for many, many years, Butch was king of the road in his F150 of the day, especially when on an adventure towing an RV. We were very fortunate to be able to do such extensive travel over the years, meeting many new people along the way in the parks but also marvelling at all that this wonderful world has to offer, especially in Canada where by far most of our travel was done. And no matter where we were, from coast to coast and also here in Kenora, walking together was our favourite pastime.
Along with myself, Butch is survived by his sisters-in-law Jane Belair and Donna Campbell and their families, and by many Stockham and Landry nieces and nephews and their families including his godson David Stockham. He was predeceased by his father Ivor (1908-1975) and mother Irene (1908-1997), his in-laws Margaret and Don Pitt (2005 and 2015), his sister Shirley Landry (1929-2009) and brother James Stockham (1931-2008) and his sister-in-law Adrienne Stockham (2018). He was also predeceased by his brothers-in-law Rick Belair (2006) and Jim Campbell (2013), and Cederwall family from his first marriage.
Butch was definitely without a doubt a one of a kind guy, a very loving, funny, and caring man and I can’t even begin to imagine what life will be without him. Not only my husband, he was my best friend, the person I wanted to be with above all others as he with me. My family, our neighbours, and our friends have been so fantastic during his illnesses that words cannot adequately express our thanks. Following cremation, Butch will be interred with his father Ivor at the Lake of the Woods Cemetery at a private service at a later date, me joining him when it is my time. In lieu of flowers or donations in his memory, please do what Butch had been doing, live in the moment and appreciate each and every day of this wonderful world. And if you get a chance to crack a joke or make someone smile or laugh, all the better as he would be laughing right along with you.
Judy
You can shed tears that he is gone
Or you can smile because he has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that he’ll come back
Or you can open your eyes and see all he’s left.
Your heart can be empty because you can’t see him
Or you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember him and only that he’s gone
Or you can cherish his memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back
Or you can do what he’d want: smile, open your eyes,
love, and go on.
Online condolences may be made at www.brownfuneralhomekenora.com
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