Mary Loyce Ingram Vandiver

Mary L. Vandiver, age 88, was born on May 4, 1926, in Floydada, TX, and was the third child of Lonnie C. Ingram and Myrtle Gilbreath Ingram. Mary was raised in East Texas on a farm owned by relatives where they picked cotton for a living. She attended schools in Winnsboro and Como, and was very much a Daddy's girl. Her Daddy called her "Woss-hopper", and she called him "Paw-Dad". The family moved to Dallas, TX when Mary was a teenager. Her brothers and sisters were her best friends. They teased and pranked each other on a regular basis, but they all remained very close. Mama joined the Air Force during WWII; However, she found it was not going to accommodate her goals as she intended, and opted out shortly thereafter. She received a general discharge. During that time, she worked for a machine shop that cut metal for airplanes. They always told the employees not to get their oil can tips close to the metal cutting blade. One day, there was no-one else in the room with her. She was working near the machine, and saw something shoot off from the machine. She assumed she did something wrong and was afraid of getting in trouble for getting the tip of her oil can caught in the machine! She looked around her space, and everything looked fine. She continued to work and something on the floor caught her eye. It was a piece of a finger lying on the floor. She was startled and looked around, but nobody else was nearby. She quickly looked at her hands and realized her middle finger was half gone with blood squirting with every beat of her heart. When she went to her lead supervisor, she held her right hand behind her left hand, and the blood was so thick it looked like oil. Her lead supervisor reminded her not to get any oil on her. She then held her hand up to show him the dark fluid was not oil, but blood, and he screamed "AAAHHHH!" at the sight of her hand. Mama always laughed every time she recalled her supervisor’s reaction! They didn't know what to do with the partial finger, so they flushed it down the toilet. Mama told us she didn’t feel any pain when it happened, but the pain came once they sawed off the bone to even out her finger. Ironically, her Daddy had the same finger cut off when he was 17, just like Mama! Mary was a bit of a tomboy, and always thought that her parents were hoping for a boy when they had her. She loved climbing tree’s and all sports, especially baseball. She once saw a boy flirting with her eldest sister Jean. She didn’t know what flirting was, and she assumed this boy was bothering her sister. She decided to take action, climbed up on his back, and beat him up! Mama was first married at age 19 to Earl Case. He tragically died in a plane crash shortly after WWII. She was then briefly married to a man named Frank, but she had that marriage annulled. She then met Paul Vandiver at Bible study. Mary and Paul fell in love and got married in Dallas on March 5, 1959. They made Oak Cliff their home up until the time her last child was born. Due to desegregation and the fear of her children being sent to unknown schools, she moved her family to North Mesquite in 1971. In June 1976, they moved to South Mesquite, where she resided until her death. While she resided in Oak Cliff, Mary attended Beverly Hills Baptist Church. A family from church approached Mary and said that they needed someone to watch their children. This lady had observed “Mama”, and knew that she didn't want anyone other than Mary, to take care of her children. Mama was self sufficient, and would always find a way to get what she wanted. One year she wanted an electric dryer, but it wasn’t in their budget. Daddy had told her that if she could earn the money, she could have one, So Mama took these children in and looked after them at home, eventually earning enough money to buy her dryer! She continued to watch children in her home for many years, just as her mother did. Mama had many jobs, but her true calling, was being a caring mother not only to her children, but the many children she cared for. She held other jobs as a practical nurse at Baylor Hospital, teaching handicapped children, and working part time from home for the Helms Printing Company where Daddy worked. She also worked for a bank in downtown Dallas, and for AT&T doing assembly work for Honeywell in a clean room setting. Mama loved people. She felt that she had been put on this earth to love people. She loved her children more than any mother could. I believe that even through her darkest times of alcoholism, she loved her children. She would do anything for them. She sincerely loved people. When she told her AA friends that she loved them, she really meant it! And her love was unconditional! She loved her children and her grandchildren with a passion! Her grandchildren and great-grandchildren knew that their Mimi loved them with all her heart! Mama was not an indoors, dressing up, crafty woman. She preferred being outside, digging in the dirt, cutting branches from trees, trimming bushes, picking tomatoes from her vines, and tending her rose bushes. In her later years, her favorite thing to do was to sit on her front or back porch, smoking her cigarettes, drinking her coffee, reading and watching nature. Her neighbors either knew her as the neighborhood grandma or at least as the lady who sat on her porch all the time. And she would do this in any weather: cold, hot, wet or dry, and any time of the day or night. Mama was a night owl and loved being up during different times of the night. In her later years, Mama became a very accepting, loving, forgiving person. No matter who you were or what you did, her theory was that you were doing the best that you could, and she would accept you right where you were. Mother used to always talk to us about her mortality. One thing she would say was that she was going to live until the age of 118. She said she would eventually get really sick, but then piddle around and get well, and live another 118 years. Our beloved mother passed away on March 11, 2015 at the age of 88. She is preceded in death by her husband Paul Vandiver; siblings Jeanetta Beth Hendrix, Jo Reta Samons, Leonard Carroll Ingram, and Edith Jewell Murphy. Mary is survived by her loving children: Kathryn Joyce Vandiver Serrato and husband Jose Serrato of Mesquite, Mary Lynell Vandiver and partner Kevin Ogletree of Waxahachie, Carolyn Lea Vandiver Withrow and husband Kenneth Withrow of Mesquite, and Elizabeth Ann Vandiver of Mesquite; Brother Lonnie Ray Ingram and wife Barbara Ingram of Mesquite; Grandchildren Ken Wright Jr. and wife Kim Wright of Mesquite, Holly Wright York and husband Joseph York of Mesquite, Nicolas Wright of Waxahachie, Jose Serrato Jr. and wife Ashlyn Serrato of Mesquite, Anna Serrato Arias and husband Orlin Arias of Mesquite, Laura Serrato of Mesquite, Paul Serrato of Mesquite, Alix Withrow, Moira Withrow, and Dara Withrow; Great-grandchildren Braden Wright, Jade Wright, Davyn Wright, andGabriel York; Numerous nephews, nieces, and a host of other family and friends.