Gabriel Barban

BARBAN, Gabriel - The Barban family sadly announces the sudden, but peaceful death of Gabriel Barban P.Eng. at his home on Tuesday November 1st, 2011. Gabriel leaves his loving wife Theresa Rose, who he affectionately called TR, and his family; David (Margaret), Krista (Steve Hemphill), and Carla; his grandchildren who adored their Nono: Rachel, Brianna, Zoe, and Gabriella; his brothers Raymond (Gertie), Carlo (Marie), Reno (Sue Pettijohn), Bruno (Marilyn); and his sister Valli (Edward) Korab; also his brothers- and sisters-in-law: the late Arthur (Cathy) Kinsella, late Joan (late Harry) Flood, Leonard (late Janet) Kinsella, Donald (Lee) Kinsella, Doris (late Carey) Milan, and the Honorable Senator Noel (Ann) Kinsella; as well as his last living uncle Aldo DeLorenzi and Zia Lizetta (Frank) Turchet. He was loved and adored by many devoted cousins, nephews and nieces from the Barban, Kinsella, DeLorenzi, Palandra and Korab families; as well as numerous friends and colleagues, many of whom he considered as close as family. Gabriel left a legacy of loving kindness and generosity to everyone who knew him. He successfully established his own business over 40 years ago, and proudly shared his life long passion and talent as a Professional Mechanical/Electrical Consulting Engineer with his son David. He has left his design concepts and mark on hundreds of projects throughout the City of Sault Ste. Marie, as well as many other areas throughout Ontario. To all of us, his big bear hugs, smile, and love of life & family will warm our hearts and our memories forever. Friends may call at the Arthur Funeral Home & Cremation Centre on Friday, November 4, 2011 from 2 – 4 and 6 – 9 pm. Funeral Mass celebrated from St. Gerard Majella Catholic Church on Saturday, November 5, 2011 at 10 a.m. Rev. Francis Ezenezi officiating. Interment Holy Sepulchre Cemetery. Memorial contributions to the Heart & Stroke Foundation would be appreciated by the family.

Funeral Mass Eulogy - November 5, 2011

I would like to start off by welcoming each of you here today. I feel very proud that my father and family have built such a wonderful and caring community around them. What an incredible tribute to a very amazing man. So I thank you for being here.

My name is Krista Barban and I speak to honour my father, Gabe, on behalf of my siblings and my mom. I think I would regret not taking this opportunity to speak about my dad. However, as a close friend said earlier this week, “there is no trouble finding the words to describe how wonderful Gabe is, it’s finding the voice to get through it”. How true this is, so I will need his help and all of yours to get through this.

My father just celebrated his 70th birthday this past June. A lifetime filled with treasured memories and friendships for an incredible man. I’ll start with telling you a little about my dad’s history and a quick synopsis. The Barbans came to Canada from Italy, when my dad was only 7 years old. They had very little with basically the clothes on their backs and each other. Ray, Carlo, Reno, Valli and my dad came to Canada with their parents Joseph and Dorina by ship through Ellis Island. They came to build a new life together and at first needed to rely on the generosity of strangers and family to make it to Sault Ste. Marie. It was here, that they chose to build their new life and start their families. Uncle Bruno was born and soon after came spouses and all their offspring. My father was pleased that all his siblings had offspring close in age, as he said we could take care of each other. After marrying my mom in 1965, my parents had three children, David, myself and then Carla. Later, he would go on to gain a wonderful daughter-in-law in Mag, special friend in Licia, son-in-law in Steve, and four beautiful grandchildren in Rachel, Brianna, Zoe and Gabriella....his namesake. Steve and I chose to name our daughter after my dad, as in Steve’s words, “he is the best man I have ever met”. Now, starting out in Canada with little did not mean that my father grew up not knowing the value of things. He knew and taught us that the most important thing of value in life...and that was family. He also included the many friends gathered here in what he referred to as his family.

My dad knew the value of family and he also knew the value of love. He loved his brothers and sisters and his parents before him. He adored his older relatives, his cousins, his friends, his nephews and nieces. Gabe was wonderful with babies, his grand daughters and all dogs. I once remember finding so many dog toys in his office desk that I had to wonder what he did all day. He treasured his friendships with the Collegiate crew, his fellow football players, the UNB gang, the Sigma Sault fraternity and the ‘older than dirt boys’. I loved to hear my dad , his brothers and his buddies tell stories about the good ole days. Boy did they have a lot of fun. He would tell us stories about some rumbles these crazy west end boys would get themselves into. How he and Reno would get Nona going when they would come home late. How the boys would hop backyard fences all the way home. He said they would only eat a couple things from each backyard garden, so would not afford anyone hardship. One of the funnier stories ended with my dad realizing him and his buddies were actually standing his own backyard eating out of Nona’s garden!

Gabe demonstrated the values of integrity and commitment. He made a good life for himself. He made many friends based on these values and established himself in the community. He won himself an education at UNB by playing football and kept it by studying hard in the field of engineering. Over 40 years he built a successful professional mechanical and electrical consulting engineering business called NorMech Engineering. He earned the respect of those in the field through his demonstrations of integrity and commitment. He was fortunate to find some special work relationships that became true life long friendships. He shared his passion for the field with my brother David and together they worked in partnership for years. My dad was a respected mentor and teacher to all.

Gabe knew the value of being honourable. And was a man of his word. He spoke to me about how it pleased him that he had built a reputation in his business for honesty. No one ever questioned his word. He always kept his promises. He promised my mother's family that he would bring her and us kids out east to New Brunswick every year. And he did. For some young kids the idea of a road trip with movies, ds's, and smart phones sounds fun...but our 5,000 kilometer trips consisted of my parents throwing us into the back of the station wagon to battle it out over colouring books and crayons....we didn`t even have seat belts!! However, my dad never complained. He would threaten us kids ‘don`t make me pull over’ from time to time, but never complained.

My father knew the value of friendship and affection. He was known to give the best bear hugs. He also was well known for nicknames. He had many himself! Gabler, Gabbie haze, Gub and Gabriellii . Just last Sunday and Monday we had been black berry messaging each other about the different things going on in our days and he kept signing off using the symbols of two thumbs down. He told me to look it up for meaning. This (the upward thumb sign) means yes and this (the downward thumb) means no. Therfore my dad was signing off as....Nono. (Italian for grandfather) I didn`t get a chance to tell him I figured it out his new nickname.

Gabe also made up a few nicknames of his own for others too. He called Rachel Rose (r_squared), Pete Horsford pistal pete, Brianna banana, Carla-rosie, recently he referred to himself and Gabriella G1 + G2 and of course his beloved Theresa Rose would always be TR. He always showed affection in his tone and his smile for each of us. He certainly had a way that kept each of us feel extra special in his own way. Many you can probably relate or tell a similar story. One of my favourite memories was that he would track Carla down, no matter where in the world she happened to be, so that he could sing her happy birthday.

Some of you may not know this. My dad actually invented his own language. Barbaneze. This was my dad’s own language. Not quite English, not quite Italian, and not quite making sense all the time. It also took years of experience to figure out just what he was saying. “Go get me the thingamagig” could have meant anything from a screwdriver, a knife, a pen, the television remote or even the tractor. Sometimes speaking Barbaneze was included in his stories...who ever heard a story from my dad that didn’t include the phrase “all of a sudden”. Maybe some of you have heard the story of about Gabe vs the chipmunk. He would always get into how he was “thinking like chipmunk” while he hid behind the white sapling and he knew what the chipmonk was going to do next. See Jack O’Neil later today if you’d like to hear the rest of the story. Sometimes my dad didn’t even need to use verbal language. He would give us the confused look and the hands up signal with the “ahhh”. The rest of us would have to try and figure out what he needed...."What do you need Dad? salt, a fork, a glass, the remote"....sometimes we’d have to encourage him to use his words. Many of these sessions were preceeded by yelling my mother’s name TeeRrrrrr.

My dad had a great sense of humour. I'm sure he is well known for his stories and funny jokes and sayings he was always forwarding through email. How many of you ever got "hit" by the dancing purple pig on MSN? We found a prayer he had taped up on his bookshelf in his office that read: Dear God, My prayer for 2011 is for a fat bank account and a thin body. Please don’t mix these up like you did last year.

Gabe loved his "camp" in beautiful Moffet Bay. He called it “la Dolce Vita”...meaning the good life. It was the place where he would go to enjoy the simple things. He was so happy that some of his most favourite people in the world had also choosen to carve out their own pieces of paradise on St. Joe’s Island. My dad loved to sit on his front deck and enjoy the view. He and my mother would joke that they were sitting out watching the sprinklers go round. We would boat, take the kids tubing, 4 wheel, and entertain. He was a wonderful cook and spent hours preparing meals for his friends and family. Before building his dream home on the Island, we spent years trailering and camping. In Boyne City, we would hit the beach and it was here that my Dad even ran a 10 mile race. We would go up north to Obatanga to fish and pick blueberries. Before we upgraded to our orange 1972 speedboat, which we still have today, we would boat in our 12 foot aluminum boat with the 1.5 horsepower trolling motor. Our family would have to leave the shore an hour ahead of all the other fishing families...who sped by us with their 10 horsepower motors...to get to the fishing spot at the same time. We packed that boat. The 5 of us, a dog, the fishing gear and the cooler. The boat was so heavy that we were about an inch from taking on water....and if it was wavy...we’d have to turn around and head back to shore.

My dad knew the value of keeping traditions. As a family we celebrated seafood Christmas eves, Sunday dinners, birthdays, Florida vacations and attended mass together. Maybe some of you noticed these themes in the photo collection at the funeral home yesterday? (maybe some of you noticed wine glasses were often themes at many of those parties) I remember my parents hosting many the party: the progressive 10 parties, potlucks, fondues, bbqs, and many more. Certainly two favourites that came to mind were the Barban Annual Christmas parties and the DeLorenzi reunions. My dad took the lead in the tradition of his father before him in terms of making the Barban wine and salami. He’d host the wine making party with his brothers, a few close friends, his nephews and my brother. On another moon cycle he’s host the salami and sausage making party. He would lead the charge in cutting, dicing, and spicing the meat. My cousins and brother have since confessed that these parties may have been all business at times, but also ended up sometimes being more about the wine tasting than about the sausage making. My dad would always say “the string was too dry”.

Dad was a fabulous cook and nothing went better with good food than a glass of wine. But it wasn't the food and wine that he actually lived for....it was who he chose to share it with. He loved celebrating being together and sharing stories, if even just over a glass of wine. There are likely few here today that have not shared a glass of wine or a meal with Gabe. Not a lot of people take the time for simple pleasures, we can take a lesson from Gabe.

My family is wearing a bit of red and a rose for my Dad today. The Rose is an important symbol for my family as is the colour red. We have a line of roses in our family: Theresa Rose, Carla Rose, Rachel Rose and Gabriella Rose. The colour red stands for passion, for love, as well as a little danger. I think red symbolizes and suits my Dad. He was all those things involved in being passionate and loving. I think my Dad looked good in red. He sometimes saw red. And he drank red. So it's perfect! Gabe would want you to put a little red in your life. Be passionate about your pursuits and your family, and love deeply. I had a couple people tell me this week that “When someone dies and people mourn...it is a testament to how much they will be missed and how their legacy will continue to live on.” Of course, “The more you are blessed, the more it hurts when you lose that blessing”. How true are both of these sayings today. I ask that the next time you find yourself with a glass of wine in your hand, be sure to raise it in a toast to this incredible and wonderful man, Gabriel Barban. We will toast to him and he and his legacy will continue to live in us and with us forever.

November 15, 2011

The family of Gabriel Barban would like to thank our wonderful friends and family for all the love, support and prayers during this difficult time. We appreciate all that you did to honour Gabe, and for all the continued support for us during this time of sorrow. He was an integral part of our lives, and will be greatly missed. We were overwhelmed by the number of people who travelled to be with us, the large number of attendees at the visitation and funeral services, the beautiful flower arrangements, and the generous amounts of food and donations. It was a wonderful tribute to a great man. Special thanks to Bruce Cooke and Arthur's Funeral Home, for your compassion and guidance. We especially want to thank Father Francis Ezenezi, Father Veselko Kvesic, and Reverend Len Monico for the beautiful Funeral mass. To the residents of Sault Ste. Marie, from the motorists, to the contractors that removed their hard hats at the Solar farm on Black Road, we say thank you. The respect that is shown for SSM funeral processions renders one speechless and is very humbling. Just like Gabriel, we are all so proud to call Sault Ste. Marie our home.