Steven Herbert Helferd

Steve was born on September 2, 1954 in Lewes, Delaware near Fort Miles, to Margot Helferd and Lynn William Helferd. Steve grew up in an Army family living, as a child, in Dupont (WA), Monterey (CA), Pittsburgh (PA), Columbus (GA) and Munich (Germany). He graduated from Crossland High School, Class of ’72, in Camp Springs, MD. He enlisted in the Navy as a steward in 1974, serving after training, as the Captain’s Chef/Steward on the USS Vreeland during a Mediterranean deployment. Following a 1980 ceremony in his parents’ home in Lincolnia, Virginia, Steve was married to Kate Jackson until 2001.

Steve graduated from the Culinary Institute of America in upstate New York in 1979 and became a professional Chef. He worked in fine dining and casual establishments until the latter part of his career. Living in New York City at the beginning of his culinary career, he worked at famous landmarks such as Tavern on the Green and the Russian Tea Room before starting the Well-Dressed Deli in Alexandria, Virginia in 1985 with Kate, which they operated until 1992 when they closed it to focus on their new bundle of joy, Rachel. Steve was a resident of Alexandria, Virginia for the remainder of his life. Towards the end of his career, he applied his calling to cook for seniors in a retirement home and to prepare meals for individuals experiencing homelessness in Fairfax County, Virginia.

An ardent sports fan (especially major league baseball-go Nats!), Steve was an avid bowler, joining teams in several local leagues. Until his illness, he also played in three softball leagues simultaneously.

Steve is survived by his daughter, Rachel who lives in Alexandria, VA with partner Mike Mayo; his father Lt. Colonel (Ret.) Lynn Helferd and mother Margot Helferd, who live in Lincolnia Park, VA; his older brother, Mike Helferd who lives in Aiken, SC with his spouse Patty Pies-Helferd; his sister Jaye Helferd who lives in Potomac, MD with her spouse Allan Shapiro; and Steve’s sister Patti Abbott who lives in Fairfax Station, VA with spouse John Abbott and daughter Nicole Abbott, Steve’s niece. Grace Jones Robbins, Steve’s loving companion of many years, lives in Vienna, VA. He was formerly married to Kate Jackson, who lives in Alexandria, Virginia. He is survived by his beloved beagle Daisy-Mae Helferd who is 14 years young.

Steve will be remembered as a devoted father, and a loving son and brother. He was a great friend to many and a wonderful boyfriend. Steve maintained deep connections with people with whom he bowled and played softball, and with high school friends and connections from his days as a chef. He never knew a stranger; everyone loved him. Steve was kind, sentimental, well-versed, and informed, with a charismatic personality and a quick wit. He’ll be remembered as a man who was spiritual and loving with a big heart. He will be remembered as generous and understanding. He’ll be missed by all that knew him.

In lieu of flowers, please consider a donation in Steve’s honor to the American Cancer Society or the Animal Welfare League of Alexandria at

https://alexandriaanimals.salsalabs.org/honorstevehelferd/index.html