Barbara Louise Fabian

It is with such profound grief that we announce the sudden passing of Barbara L. Fabian on May 28, 2025, at the age of 58, a loss that was as unexpected as it is immeasurable.

There are so many ways this beautiful woman touched people’s lives — from her early days as a protective and inclusive new kid advocate at Fairburn Elementary, to Cedar Hill Jr. High, where she continued to show nurturing wisdom and developed a budding love of writing and editing. She brought both of these to life as editor of the school annual at Mt. Doug Senior Secondary, where her sharp wit and ’80s fashion also helped her stand out as one of ‘the breezeway’ crowd.

That early outgoing and caring spirit - and her deep understanding of people - carried into her career in banking, where her people-first mindset made her a standout employee and team leader at TD and Island Savings Credit Union.

Barb was also a truly engaged and dedicated Victoria resident who loved to participate in community events from local theatre to Symphony Splash to the Highland Games, she was keen to participate. From local theatre to championing small businesses, she enjoyed being woven into the fabric of Victoria life.

As a daughter and sister, she was a strong and independent voice in the family, respecting and honouring family bonds, choosing to love and support her siblings, Steven and Jennifer, stepbrothers, Craig and Mike, and to be there for her mom, Diane, and Diane’s husband, Dave, through all that life threw at the family.

As a mom, she was always there for her daughters, Sara and Rachael – showing up, admittedly imperfect, but always present. She guided them through scraped knees, broken hearts, and countless joyful moments as they navigated life together. She taught them strength, resilience, and compassion – not by preaching, but by living as an example.

Whether at work, in relationships or everyday life, she modeled how to face challenges with grace, grit, and authenticity.

Self-deprecating and funny, Barb loved to laugh. And she laughed along with everyone she knew – a bright, contagious laugh – one of the first things you noticed, and one of the hardest to forget.

Infinitely curious about people and their lives, she was opinionated in a no-nonsense and practical way. Often over nachos or wine, she was comfortable holding her own in a discussion, yet not afraid to admit when she was wrong. Barb excelled at observing, listening, learning, and incorporating other points of view into her thinking, even if it took her a minute (and maybe another glass of wine).

As an accomplished writer, Barb kept a detailed diary for years. It became her way to relive the best moments, fact-check the fuzzy ones, and occasionally settle a friendly score.

Barb was, above all else, an instigator. Never one to shy away from spontaneous kitchen dance parties to ‘80s music, Barb held a “dance because you can” attitude stemming from a desire to live life to the fullest extent possible in every moment.

She often took initiative to consider, research, plan and lead the way in her partnerships, including with her first husband Jim, her family and among her countless, lifelong friends. Whether she was scouting a new restaurant, organizing a group escape to a château in the south of France, or hosting a casual evening with friends Barb would lead the way.

To know Barb was to marvel at how she just made things happen, for herself and everyone around her. She could plan a trip, wrangle a group, and still show up impeccably dressed in an outfit she’d somehow found the time to shop for.

In addition to her daughters, siblings, and mom, Barb is survived by her partner and best friend, Nick, with whom she shared a love of creating and entertaining in beautiful homes, travel, and theatre (on and very off Broadway). Together they were lovers and plate sharers of great food, wine, interesting and engaged people, and most of all, many, many, many laughs. They complemented each other in rare and remarkable ways. It was the kind of partnership written about in novels and featured in Hollywood movies.

In these early days, as the love from those she left searches for a place to go, we’re reminded that Barb, a silver lining kind of person, would have made room for the tears. Then, when the time was right and the pain had subsided a little, she would likely call to mind the sentiment behind the words of Dr. Seuss: “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” And she’d mean it.

And so in her memory, with love, and definitely a little laughter, we shall.

A Celebration of Life will be held at UVic in the University Club on Wednesday, August 20, 2025 from 5:00-7:00pm. Please use the link below to sign up for service updates and reminders.