Bernardo "Bernie" Santiago Gotianse

It is with a heavy heart that we announce the passing of our wonderful husband, father, and grandfather, Bernie G. He passed peacefully on January 17, 2026, at the age of 80, at his home at the heart of Kempsville in Virginia Beach. Bernie was born in Malabon, Philippines, and later enlisted in the United States Navy in 1970.

Bernie worked as a Chief Petty Officer for the United States Navy for 24 years. He loved his country, his military family, and friends. He continued his dedication to serving for many years with MWR (Morale, Welfare, and Recreation), where he supported active-duty and retired military members and their families alike, in which they gave his code name of “Bernie G.” Through his work, he built and maintained deep, lasting friendships within the military community. These friendships meant a great deal to him that became a great source of joy, laughter, and connection throughout his life.

Poppy had so many passions. His first deep love was tennis and being part of the Tennis Club community for many years at Little Creek Amphibious Base. He made sure his daughters learned to play, which he continued to pass this passion down to his granddaughters. Poppy loved to watch them play and took such pride watching them grow and enjoy the sport. He later discovered a love for golf, playing on New Year’s Eve with his son-in-law, Dan. But it didn’t take long for him to find another passion for collecting guns. Poppy spent lots of time at the shooting range and collecting several hundred guns, which only made Neddie furious with how much he started to collect them, but just strengthening his bonds with his nephews and in-laws in Chicago. Poppy was a man who embraced life fully with enthusiasm and put his whole heart into whatever he loved.

More than anything in the world, his life revolved around his family and most especially his grandchildren, who were truly the center of his universe. They were his greatest joy, his constant source of pride, and his favorite people to be around. He had a special way of showing his love: through his humor, his playful teasing, and his generosity. He loved to tease his grandchildren, and gently make fun of them, and, of course, always found an excuse to give them large amounts of money. He always supported his grandchildren, cheering them on at volleyball games, tennis matches, gymnastic meets, soccer games, chorus recitals, dance recitals, and encouraging them in Taekwondo.

Poppy loved to sing, and that was one of the many gifts my dad gave our family was music. He loved to sing because he loved an audience, but because it was how he shared joy, how he filled our home with warmth and comfort. He spent many hours singing to us when we were young, which would drive us crazy. He loved to entertain others by singing to them, filling his home with music, laughter, and life. Karaoke nights were a treasured part of our childhood, as we listened to him sing with joy and confidence. The love of music continued through joining the Fil-Am ministry choir and through that love of music, it lived on through Bernadette, who also sang at family gatherings and later at church, which ultimately led her to meet her husband. Together they shared that same gift, passing it on to their son, Channing and Allegra, their daughter. She who would sing to Poppy when he was sick these past several months. So, when we hear her sing, we’re not just hearing a song; we’re hearing a legacy. We’re hearing my dad’s love echoing through generations. He delighted in having people over, sharing stories, and making others laugh. With his wide smile and ferocious sense of humor, he had a rare gift for bringing joy wherever he went.

Bernie would have been married to Neddie for 55 years on February 14, 2026. He is survived by his two daughters: Christine Marsh and her husband, Dan P. Marsh, and Bernadette Parris with her husband, David Earl Parris. His five grandchildren are Danielle Patricia Marsh (24), Cydney Marie Marsh (22), Charles Bernard Marsh (16), Channing Earl Parris (14), and Allegra Anne Parris (9). He is also survived by many of Neddie’s family members in Chicago and the Philippines.

Poppy’s last outing was spent doing something he loved, watching his granddaughters play volleyball. And his last meal out was shared with family and cousins from Chicago at Captain George’s, surrounded by the people he loved. Though his last eight months of his life were spent resting at home, he was never alone, with his wife by his side every day. He was cared for and, with deep love, we stayed next to him constantly, until it was time for him to go. We will always cherish his final conversation a few days before he passed, asking Christine, “When is Boo Boo’s wedding?” When told “not until April, Poppy,” he seemed to understand. He spent the last night of his life where he wanted to be: at home in bed, asleep next to his beautiful wife. Poppy was so strong and fought so hard to stay, but in his strength and grace, he knew he could hold on no longer. We miss him deeply and wish we had more time. He was and always will be our Poppy forever.

A wake will be held on January 25th from 4:00 to 8:00 pm at Smith and Williams Funeral Home on 4889 Princess Anne Road in Virginia Beach.The next day a Catholic funeral mass will be celebrated at St. Gregory the Great Catholic Church at 11:00 am. A reception will follow, with details to be announced.

The family is grateful for the love, prayers, and support during this time and welcomes all who knew and loved him to join in celebrating his life.