Benton, better known as ‘Ben’ to his friends and family was a generous man who shared his life with everyone around him. A man of few words, he embraced life to its fullest and shared it best through serving others. Ben was a dependable, reliable, loyal friend. He was the kind of friend that if you needed him, he would be there no matter what he had going on. Often working behind the scenes, he never sought accolades or recognition, teaching us what it means to love well and help others. Ben retired after 30 years of service with the North Carolina State Highway Patrol, then served for another 10 years with BellSouth, installing central office equipment. He sang in the church choir, was a member of the Cary Masonic Lodge (#198), served in the United Methodist Men’s group, and he cooked a lot of barbeque! Most of all he was a beloved husband of 55 years, a loving dad, a proud papa, a dependable brother, a generous friend, and he loved his neighbor as himself.
Ben grew up in Eastern North Carolina with 9 siblings and was affectionately known as “Brother” and graduated from Franklin High School in 1959. He married the love of his life, Louise Oakes, and then joined the Highway Patrol in 1965. Together they had one son, Benton (Benny) Watkins Oakes, III. He was blessed with four beautiful granddaughters who were the pride and joy of his life. He loved taking them to White Lake, cooking the best eggs and grits ever, and he even joined them for a tea party or two. Often times you would find him on his big red tractor, making a backyard garden, or grading the neighborhood pool parking lot. Ben loved to cook and was known for his famous BBQ. Making music was often a comfort for his soul and you could find him playing his harmonica, strumming his guitar, picking his bango, or singing in the church choir. Anyone who was in his presence would tell you they were a better person because they knew him.
His memory and gifts of love and service he leaves to those surviving, his wife, Louise Oakes of 55 years; his son, Benton W. Oakes, III (Monica) of Moncure; four granddaughters, Hailey, Kaelyn, Abigail, and Carter; 4 brothers,Fletcher (Cathy) of Wade, Kenneth of Clinton, Joe (Pam) of Faison, David Oakes (Ji Wone) of Enterprise, Alabama; 4 sisters, Ellen of Fayetteville, Mary Elizabeth Mehl (Gene) of Kansas, Peggy Carter(Pete) of Clinton, Carol Rouse (Bobby) of Faison; and many nieces, nephews and cousins.
He is preceded in death by his father, Benton Watkins Oakes Sr.; mother, Thelma Taylor Oakes and brother, Keith Oakes.
The family will receive friends from 6-8pm on Monday, April 23, 1018 at Brown-Wynne Funeral Home, 200 SE Maynard Road, Cary, NC 27511. A funeral service will be held 2pm Tuesday, April 24, 2018 at Apex United Methodist Church, 100 S. Hughes Street, Apex, NC 27502. Burial will follow at Ebenezer United Methodist Church Cemetery, 724 Beaver Creek Road, Apex, NC 27502.
In lieu of flowers donations can be made to either Ebenezer or Buckhorn United Methodist Church where his son serves as Pastor, or Methodist Home for Children.
