Palmyre Clara Brigden

Mom was born on March 3rd, 1926. She died on March 4th, 2021, one day after her 95th birthday. She was named Palmyre Clara Laura Ippolito. Mom chose to change her name to Paula after tiring of the incessant teasing she endured at school for her unusual first name. Her classmates wanted to call her Polly which Mom absolutely could not abide! She took charge and handled the situation with her unique combination of fierceness and wit. A dear friend of mine described Mom as a “Comedic Warrior”. That says it all! She was strong and blunt but she expressed her truth with humour and grace. She was used to standing up for herself from early on… after all, she was the only girl with three brothers in the family for eleven years. Finally Aunt Lorraine showed up, followed by Aunt Helen two years later. Mom’s brothers Maurice, Raymond, and Omer preceeded Mom into heaven. I can imagine them welcoming her with a mixture of joy and trepidation. Watch out boys, there’s a new sheriff in town! Mom grew up during the depression and experienced the effects of World War 2 first hand. Mom remembered the RCMP delivering letters to her dad from overseas. Because of their famous Italian last name, the letters had been carefully read first and edited with certain parts cut out by the Canadian authorities. They were on the lookout for spies! Mom’s father, Alvarito (Fred) Ippolito had immigrated to Canada, an Italian from Belgium. Grandpa Ippolito totally embraced Canada and never had any desire to return to Europe; they were harassing the wrong guy. Taking the time to scour his postcards and letters from overseas along with the visits from the Mounties to the farm, was a little over the top. The unfairness of the treatment of her father greatly impacted Mom. Growing up in this unique timeframe in history inspired in Mom a special compassion for the underdog, which was also shared by our father, John (Jack) Brigden, who died in 1998. They’ll be so happy to be reunited again. I’m guessing that there’s a lot of dancing and celebrating going on up there right now. There were always extra people sharing our table for special celebrations such as Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, etc. Grandpa Ippolito started the tradition. He would quite often come home with several workers to share a meal at the farm. Grandma (Laura Dechief Ippolito) always prepared enough food to feed a small army. They had six children to feed so a few more never fazed Grandma. Music played a huge part in Mom’s life. Mom and her brothers used to jam together in their own band. They were all very talented and each of them played many different instruments by ear. Mom used to call music her therapy. If she was upset about anything, she’d sit down at the piano and play until she wasn’t upset anymore. Mom grew up in a traditional patriarchal family meaning there was a different set of rules for her brothers than for her. This, of course, did not sit well with Momma! She was an early feminist. She was very independent and outspoken.

“I knew one thing for sure…I was not going to be a farmer’s wife. It appeared that the only break you got as a farmer’s wife was to have a baby. On top of that, I hated cows. I thought they were stupid and I didn’t have much luck rounding them up to be milked. I did enjoy driving the little Ford tractor though.”

Mom was an adventurer and she wanted to see the world. Fortunately, Mom met our dad in 1946 and in 1948, they were married. Dad was stationed in Marville, France in 1958 and as a family we travelled by boat to France and then explored all of Europe in our well used tent. It was nonstop fun times. Dad was the ideal man for Mom. Dad was the consummate gentleman with a wicked sense of humor. Mom and Dad made each other laugh! Dad liked to switch things up and move often. Mom didn’t have any time to be bored…she was too busy packing up and setting up a new house. Mom had picked up a serious addiction to travelling from her experiences in Europe. She had many good friends who she valued so much and they went on vacations together to places Dad wasn’t interested in visiting. I mistakenly thought that all marriages worked in this lovely, copacetic way. Mom and Dad had a mutual respect for each other. We never heard our parents fight. They must have had their disagreements but they didn’t subject us to any of the fireworks. Classy. Our house was where all of our friends loved to hang out to enjoy each other’s company with a never-ending pool tournament going on in the background. Mom and Dad had an open door policy. Our friends loved our parents as well. Mom worked her whole life…her choice. As a professional working woman, Mom was a fabulous fashionista! She was consistently put together from head to toe. I don’t recall a time when she didn’t have a beautiful self-created manicure, head-turning outfit and coordinated accessories going on. As her hippy-style daughter who wore coveralls and ripped jean jackets, I really have no clue as to how she accomplished this seemingly impossible feat! She enjoyed all of her jobs, especially as the librarian of O’Leary High School and finally, as a secretary to Dr. Elizabeth Schwab (psychiatrist) for several years. Mom was a strong woman who totally supported other strong women. Dr. Schwab and Mom had a special bond and a great respect for each other. Mom loved working for Dr. Schwab and she learned a great deal from her. That meant you were in danger of being psychoanalyzed by Mom at any given moment…and trust me, she was good at it! Ouch! Mom took up painting after she retired and she really enjoyed it. We all have original framed paintings by Paula Brigden hanging in our homes. Mom had an extremely dry wit. It was so delicious to see the look of delight on her face when she delivered one of her killer one-liners. Mom had an incredible memory and an extremely agile mind. In Mom’s 90th year, she broke both of her hips within four months of each other. Mom’s bravery throughout her ordeal was so amazing! What an example to try and emulate. We’re going to miss Mom so much but we’re also so grateful that she is free and reunited with all of her loved ones. To our wonderful mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, and sister:

You did good, Momma! Till we meet again….

The hush of heaven holds my heart today.