Helen Phyllis Panessa

Helen was born in the Bronx, New York on June 22, 1930 to parents Rocco Castlegrande and Thomasina (Alice) Castlegrande. Helen was preceded in death by her loving husband Vincent (Barry) Panessa (1987). Helen is survived by her brother Rocco Castlegrande Jr. She is preceded in death by brother Anthony Castlegrande and sisters, Virginia Mathews and Catherine Longabardi.

Helen will be profoundly missed by her children Alice Catherine Schnepf (Richard), Vincent Dan Panessa (Anne) and Daniel Anthony Panessa (Connie). She was the proud grandmother of Thomasina Schnepf, Christian Schnepf, Vincent Panessa Jr., Tiffany Panessa Youtchoko, and Danielle Parsons. She was also great-grandmother to Quinten, Calvin, Emma, Elijah, Jeremiah, Mallory, Eveline and Delilah. She will also be fondly remembered by several nieces and nephews. Helen will be deeply missed by dear friends she considered family.

Helen faced numerous challenges in her younger years. Unwanted by her father at birth, she was sent to live with her Mama (Grandma) and Papa until the age of 7 when her mother petitioned the court to get her back. Helen’s earliest memory as a child was her mother holding her one hand and her grandmother holding the other hand, feeling pulled apart. At the age of 7, she met her four siblings for the first time. Sadly, her mother passed away when Helen was just 14, so she raised her younger siblings.

Helen met Barry in 1945 at his brothers’ grocery store. They were happily married on December 9, 1950 in New York for 37 years. Helen would tell couples to be sure they “take care of their love”. Barry suffered with pulmonary disease and Helen gave her heart to being his caregiver for their entire lives together. In the early 1950s, when Barry was unable to work, Helen and Barry made veils for women’s hats and were paid 10 cents per veil. In the 1960s, Helen sewed dresses for Sears and Roebuck and got paid 50 cents a dress. Mid to late 1960s, she worked at Dawnwood Junior High school cafeteria. Helen used to give extra food to the kids who were still hungry. She got herself in trouble for doing this and would often get KP duty and had to wash all the big pots!!! Just an example of her concern for the less fortunate. Helen enjoyed working at Abraham and Straus department store in Smithtown, Long Island, New York during the late 1960s and early 70s.

Helen and Barry moved to Arizona in 1973. They were part of the founding parishioners who helped establish Holy Spirit Catholic Church in Tempe. Helen’s commitment and devotion to the parish included sharing her beautiful voice singing in the choir, teacher of the teen group, eucharistic minister, administered communion to the sick and a 25-year member/leader of the Trinity Prayer Group. As part of their ministry at Holy Spirit, Helen and Barry would collect and deliver boxes of groceries and essentials to homes in Guadalupe. In 1985, a fellow parishioner was arrested for stealing food for his family. Helen and Barry would check on his family and bring them needed food and Christmas gifts. Helen and Barry became part of the prison ministry at Holy Spirit in 1986 and Helen continued this commitment until 1997. She would deliver 25-pound packages of their favorite foods and desserts. Helen was very active at the Newman Center on the ASU campus in Tempe in the 1980s.

Some of Helen’s most memorable honors was singing (by invitation only) in the choir for the mass during Pope John Paul II’s visit to Arizona in 1987. She was also invited to make a pilgrimage to Medjugorje, Yugoslavia in 1988 (the location where visionaries have seen and received messages from the apparitions of Our Lady since 1981). Helen was a very dedicated servant of God.

Helen’s lifelong passion was helping the less fortunate and those in need. Her commitment “to be of service to the least of my brothers”, continued until the end of her life. She donated to numerous charities and helped a great many people over the years. Helen had a gift for befriending the lonely. Sometimes we would have people we did not know at our family dinners!

Helen would always make sure she had $5 bills in her pocketbook to give to people in need, people on the street, laborers and wait staff and cooks at restaurants. She would see a family with children and would give the parents $20 to take the kids for ice cream.

She had a flair for dressing up and in her early years, she adored wearing high heels. Never leaving the house without beautiful jewelry, if she were complimented, she would remove the jewelry and insist on giving it to them as a gift.

Helen treasured time spent with family, she loved making new friends and talking to people wherever she went. She loved to sing, enjoyed cooking (eggplant parmesan is the family favorite), playing the lottery, and shopping. Her favorite pastimes were going to the casino, playing cards and solitaire, watching old movies, and going out to dinner with friends and family. She always looked forward to our traditional Christmas cookie day and decorating as well as having Norwegian pancakes on New Year’s Day.

Recently, Helen enjoyed outings and being part of New Yorkers Living in the Desert, Social with Seven and New Yorkers Eating in the Desert.

Please come and celebrate her life! Viewing will be Monday, December 11, 2023 from 5 to 8 pm, Rosary at 7 pm. Mariposa Gardens, 400 S. Power Rd., Mesa, AZ. Funeral Mass will be held Tuesday, December 12, 2023 11:00 am at Holy Cross Catholic Church, 1244 S. Power Rd., Mesa, AZ. Procession to burial at 12:30 pm at Queen of Heaven, 1562 E. Baseline Rd., Mesa, AZ

In lieu of flowers, please consider a donation to Helen’s favorite charity St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, www.stjude.org