Dianna C. Johnson Tillerson

Dianna Tillerson

To begin , a eulogy is supposed to express the joy you all felt in knowing someone, and to express the sorrow and grief we all feel,in their absence. To those who were really close to Dianna it's easy to relate the joy, but it's hard to keep the anger over her loss down to an acceptable level. For me, her partner for so long this is doubly so. To me, there is no David without a Dianna. I've yet to come up,with an answer that will ease that, for I know there is none. What I will try and do is relate some of our time together, to remind everyone what a truly wonderful person she was to have shared a life with. I'll start out with a story that you all may have heard, but it was the beginning of the best part of our lives.

A lot of you have heard the story about how we met, it came about when we both worked at the Big Texan Steak Ranch in Amarillo. Dianna was the Cashier, and I was a Big Texan ( meaning all I had to do was be tall for the Tourists.) Dianna wore a black mini skirt with white sweaters and I dressed like a cowboy. She handled the money and I seated customers and had gunfights. I was stunned the first time I saw her but didn't have the nerve to come right out and ask her out. But I had a plan. It was late Dec, ice and snow covered the ground and we were to be the last two staff to leave and lock up. So I brilliantly let the air out of a tire so I could ask for a ride. So far so good. Until her 65 aqua green Mustangs battery failed. The Big Texan was out of the city limits, next to a cemetery and about 2 miles to a truck stop. We sat in my car which would at least run it's heater. I had no spare of course. An hour later a DPS car pulled up for a security check and noticed my 61 impala idling. We explained the flat and bad battery. When I asked for a ride to the truck stop to get some air, the troopers said I probably had a nail and that wouldn't help. I told them no nail, just a ride please. They reluctantly did so figuring it was a waste of time. By some strange bit of luck my tire held air so they drove us back to the Big Texan and graciously shone a floodlight on me while Dianna sat in their heated car and flirted with the troopers. Half a freezing hour later we were on our way. Dianna asked if the roads were slick with the 1" of ice. I checked by jerking my wheel and promptly slid Into the guard rail and busted a hole in my radiator. The motor froze up within a mile despite the temp. Two guys in an El Camino gladly gave the girl in the miniskirt and me a ride to a nearby friends house . It was after 2 in the morning but I at least had Dianna's phone number and a movie date for the next weekend. Of course both our parents were going nuts because it was so late and the weather so bad. But I still made a decent impression with Dianna's mom. When Dianna met my mom a few days later my Mom told me I'd be crazy if I let this one get away. I already knew I'd never find anybody who looked like and was as smart as Dianna and vowed to do whatever it took to keep my hands on her. Which in an odd way was how I attracted her, by keeping my hands to myself. She was tired of being pawed and hit on and found my politeness intriguing. I behaved myself and ended up with the love of my life and my soul mate We celebrated our 42nd anniversary on August the 5th. There will never be another like Dianna for me, I was the luckiest person in the world until last week.

Despite both coming from less then wealthy families, Dianna and I managed to travel the country, the world, have wonderful children and the greatest grandson ever and considered ourselves as much in love at the end as we were when we met. That's what's made the past few months the hardest in our lives. We always shared every thought, were each others best friends, which made sharing the grief and pain of her medical condition the worst thing that could have happened to us. But Dianna trusted me absolutely and we were convinced that with both of us fighting this 100%, we'd beat the odds and continue our plans for travel and the continued sharing of our ever increasing love for each other, but things just went horribly wrong the last day and we end up here.

As mentioned in her obituary, Dianna had been employees by numerous State agencies where she left behind many friends and imparted much influence. These agencies included those in two states. Her 20 year career began with the Children's Protective Services Program in Riverside, CA, The Texas Department of Health CHIP (Children have a Potential Program ) the Texas Workers Compensation Commission, the Texas State Board of Medical Examiners and finally retiring from the Texas Commission on Environmental Quality as a Paralegal. Despite such a varied history she managed to raise three children while traveling this country and the world.

Dianna was not an overtly religious person, believing that others had the right to worship as they wished. But she was also able to stand outside on a starry night and know that there was more to life than this small rock we stand on. She just had the sense to wait and see what was to come.

She loved children so much, I hate to admit it, but I'm so glad that 3 was our limit, and I thank the heavens that we had them while we were young and strong enough to deal with the challenges. We never could understand how people in their 50's could deal with teenagers. It is probably about the only time someone might hear me mumble thank God that's not us.

Her reasons for loving our children was always obvious, her attraction to me was often a mystery, especially after the last two 10 pound 9 oz children. It was our mutual friendship and respect for each other that contributed to our long marriage, which to us was a long way from over. I'm sure she feels as cheated as I as to the seeming shortness of our relationship. It may be a shock, or perhaps even inappropriate for a time like this to admit it, but we were both "new cars", and neither ever had any inclination to wonder what might have been or what we might have missed. We felt we shared something special that no one could take away and deepened our respect for each others self discipline.

This sort of self discipline made it easier for her to set and meet goals. Her continued education at the University of Texas was always a source of special pride and her work to become an Honor Graduate in the Paralegal Program took much work, but she never neglected her kids and family. Indeed, her efforts could be proudly pointed to motivate her children to do the same. She felt it was never too late to set new goals and let her children see how to do the same.

Dianna watched her mother care and feed for a family of five on one income and learned what value money has. She selflessly did without because a military family might as well still be living in conditions similar to the Great Depression. She related tales of her grandmother drying out tin foil and Saran Wrap. But when I made a little more rank she didn't want for herself, her concerns were always for her children that they not stand out. It always hurt me to watch that because I knew she deserved so much more and I promised that one day she'd have it. That makes this doubly hard, because now that we'd reached that point, she can't have them, yet I also know that she's more concerned about the effect this is having on the rest of us. Unselfishness is one of the greatest gifts she could have passed on her to her children and grandson, and I truly thank her Mom, Dad and Grandparents for teaching her this.

That her children pass this on was one of here greatest wishes and one that we all must strive to carry out. Dianna's fear of what effect her cancer was having on those she loved hurt me more than anything. I know you're supposed to find good in all you can, but I truly wish she'd been more selfish, even if that meant I could have only held onto her for even a little,while longer.

as far as to the time we had together, some wondered why she would go off into the unknown with me, and not stay in Amarillo, the best explanation, I've heard about this effect is that we always wonder whats over the horizon. in Amarillo, no matter which way you look the horizon never ends. Dianna's curiosity always pushed her to see what was out there. right now i hope she's seeing things none of us have ever seen. i know in my heart that she'll pause and look around long enough for those who've loved her to catch up and continue the journey with her. i know our connection was strong enough to reach across the universe and keep us in contact until we can rejoin.

what do we need to do to carry on what she's taught us? keep it simple, the right thing to do is always the obvious one. we need to teach our kids the joy of being kids, to enjoy sports as she did, and not to simply do what feels good at the moment. the best things are always worth waiting on, teach patience to our kids as Dianna tried and half the works done. one of her most recent joyful activities was watching her grandson Jonas play sports like she did. but i have one tip for Jonas, she was very good and has boxes of trophies to prove it. she never wanted them on prominent display, as her reward had already come in the activity. so have fun while you're doing whatever you decide you enjoy the most. if we pass this idea along we've done what Dianna would have wanted.

she didn't come up with this all on her own. her mom and dad and grandparents gave her the values to learn from and pass along. since our future is our kids and grand kids, please do as she would have and love them every minute and let them become their own successes, as hers have all done. Jennifer, Joanna, Jason and Jonas are well along their own successful paths and this was Dianna's greatest sense of joy. another gift passed to Dianna from her parents was never to quit. this served her strongly in her battle with cancer. and in the end, it wasn't the cancer that she couldn't hold off. even though she couldn't speak, you could tell from the smile on her face on that last day as she watched a sideshow her family and friends that she remembered all the great times that were flashing across the screen.

even near the end, she fought as hard as anyone could have. it hurt me to watch her try, knowing how much effort it was taking. but she didn't suffer and lasted longer than most of us would have. i only wish i could have traded places with her and spared her that fight, but i also know Dianna would have fought even harder to prevent something like that from happening. even so Dianna deserved more than she ended up receiving. there was still so much she had wanted to accomplish. we were able to to visit our daughter Jennifer and son in law Scott in San Francisco on two occasions. we managed to turn those visits into road trips and see national parks and other sights along the way. besides the untimely departure of my true soul mate and love of my life, my greatest sense of failure is that i didn't take her to Yellowstone which i had promised for the past few years. i also have a sense of great despair that i can't take her back to turkey for our fiftieth anniversary as I'd planned. please forgive me Dianna, i can never do so myself, but i also know you would on a moments notice. your absence is going to be an unbearable weight, i wish i had more of your forgiveness and understanding. I'll never be able to explain what your absence feels like. i can only hope the time seems short time until i can catch up with you

i know everyone always regrets when a loved one moves on, my only gratitude is that you weren't suffering at the end and the only pain was being felt by your loved ones, which is everyone who knew you. i also know in my soul that you were able to hear and understand us and that nothing was left unsaid. we had just celebrated our 42 anniversary on august 5tH , and while this seems a long time to many. it went by in a flash to me and there was so much more i wanted to do with you and so many things to see and do that I'll always feel like the time was too short and we had so much left to do. so i plan on talking to you in my dreams and calling out to you at night, so listen closely to me in the quiet when you dream and we'll keep our souls as close together as our physical separation permits.

and Dianna, i promise to hold your presence close and to continue to love our children and grandson more each day....and i also promise to finally write that book for you, I'll just have to read it aloud. we'll talk in our dreams what we think about .But never forget, we love you...

Also here are some words from your obituary in the paper that was written by your sister Jan and our kids ?..i couldn't write truer words and wouldn't try.

Dianna was one of those people who touched the lives of all who came to know her. Her family was privileged to have her in their lives for almost 61 years and will continue to carry with them all that she taught, all that she shared, and most important, all that she loved. The years spent with Dianna afforded her family and friends the opportunity to experience her grace, love, and kindness first-hand. She provided encouragement and support no matter the situation or circumstance and was always there for her children, guiding them down the many paths that life took them. She gave freely of herself, saying 'Love you a bushel and a peck and a hug around your neck', a saying she often heard her mother say which she loved. Her eyes were always filled with a spark, always filled with joy and love, always filled with compassion. Dianna was very active in her children and grandson lives and liked to visit and chat with her neighbor Mildred.

Dianna is preceded in death by her parents, and her little brother. She is survived by her husband, lover and best friend of 42 years, David. Also her children, daughter Jenifer and her husband Scott Boudar, daughter Joanna and her husband Mike Hall, son Jason, son-in-law Steven Stites, and grandson Jonas Stites, all of Austin, TX, a sister Jan Fulton and husband John of Amarillo, Texas, and two brothers Johnny Johnson and wife Sheila of Stillwater, OK., David Johnson and wife Melody of Rockwall, Texas, two special Aunts, Doris and Lorene and numerous cousins, nieces, and nephews, and her lifetime friend Robin Greenley of Austin, TX

Dianna was a lifelong Democratic and had an avid enthusiasm for politics. She loved gardening and enjoying life with her beloved grandson Jonas.

In lieu of flowers, please send donations to Doctors without Borders or other legitimate non profit children advocacy groups.

Dianna, we all love you and refuse to say goodbye, because for someone who gave as much as you, there will be more and we'll see you again, in our dreams at first, but there will be a time we can hold each other again. We love you Dianna, rest without pain or discomfort until we meet again.

David Tillerson

Service Obituary:

Dianna was one of those people who touched the lives of all who came to know her. Her family was privileged to have her in their lives for almost 61 years and will continue to carry with them all that she taught, all that she shared, and most important, all that she loved. The years spent with Dianna afforded her family and friends the opportunity to experience her grace, love, and kindness first-hand. She provided encouragement and support no matter the situation or circumstance and was always there for her children, guiding them down the many paths that life took them. She gave freely of herself, saying 'Love you a bushel and a peck and a hug around your neck'. Her eyes were always filled with a spark, always filled with joy and love, always filled with compassion. Dianna was very active in her children's and grandson's lives and liked to visit and chat with her neighbor Mildred.

Dianna is preceded in death by her parents, and her little brother. She is survived by her husband of 42 years, David; her daughters, Jenifer and her husband Scott Boudar, and Joanna and her husband Mike Hall; son Jason; son-in-law, Steven Stites; and grandson Jonas Stites; all of Austin, TX; a sister, Jan Fulton and husband John of Amarillo, Texas; and two brothers, Johnny Johnson and wife Sheila of Stillwater, OK, and David Johnson and wife Melody of Rockwall, Texas; two special Aunts, Doris and Lorene; and numerous cousins, nieces, and nephews, and her lifetime friend, Robin Greenley of Austin, TX.

Dianna was born in Amarillo, TX and graduated from Tascosa High School in 1970. She met the love of her life while working at the Big Texan while they were both in high school. She followed her husband's Air Force career and moved to Wichita Falls, TX, Riverside, CA, Austin, TX, Izmir, Turkey, and then back to Austin, TX.

Dianna was an honor graduate from the University of Texas LBJ School of Public Affairs in Austin, TX. Over her 20 year State career she worked for Child Protective Services in Riverside, CA, The Texas Department of Health Children have a Potential Program (CHiP), the Texas Workers Compensation Commission, the Texas State Board of Medical Examiners and the Texas Commission on Environmental Quality as a Paralegal.

Dianna was a lifelong Democrat and had an avid enthusiasm for politics. She loved gardening and enjoying life with her beloved grandson Jonas.

A memorial service will be held on Saturday, August 16, 2014 at 5:00 p.m. in the Memorial Chapel at Cook-Walden Capital Parks in Pflugerville.

In lieu of flowers, donations may be sent to Doctors Without Borders or other nonprofit children advocacy groups.

Please visit Dianna's memorial website at www.cookwaldencapitalparks.com