Rhonda Jo Urias

A native Phoenician she was born on June 17, 1962 to Nora Mattox and the late Harold Mattox.

Rhonda married the love of her life Joseph Urias on January 12, 1985.

She is survived by her mom Nora, husband Joe, five children Nikki, Joey, Tony, Christina & Lisa, three siblings Debbie, Mike & Chris and nine grandchildren Joseph, Serenity, Society, Tony, Nylah, Jo Jo, Phoenix, Melanee & Skye.

In addition to her father, Harold, Rhonda was preceded in death by a granddaughter Destiny.

Family and friends are invited to a viewing on Wednesday, September 2, 2020 for a visitation from 9:00am till 11:00am followed by a funeral service.

In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the family to offset funeral and burial expenses.

Funeral Service 11:00am 09/02/2020

Rhonda Jo Urias

Always There

When you remember me,

please do not weep.

My body may not be there.

It has chosen to sleep.

I’m not that far away.

My soul lives on,

looking down,

watching over you and everyone.

And when you feel sad

and life seems so blue,

just remember

that my spirit has its arms around you.

And on those special days,

times that you wish I could see,

that cool breeze flowing past you…

well, that will be me, so don’t be sad.

Have no fear.

God has taken me under his wing,

but I’ll always be near.

I still watch you

every minute, every day.

My love and soul are with you,

and that’s where they will stay. ~Emma Marie Etwell

Good morning and welcome; my name is Becky Hinton, and I am honored to be the Funeral Celebrant today, as we gather together to celebrate the life and mourn the death of Rhonda Jo Urias.

Rhonda’s death has left a hole in the hearts of her loving family; she leaves behind her mother, Nora; husband, Joe, children: Nikki, Joey and his wife, Destinee, Tony, Christina and her husband, Matthew; Lisa and her husband, Lorenzo; siblings: Debbie, Mike and Chris; grandchildren: Zackirius, Joseph, Serenity, Society, Tony, Nylah, JoJo, Phoenix, Melanee and Skye.

We gather today, because that’s what people do. Since the beginning of time, it has been part of the human condition that we stop and acknowledge the death of someone. To give honor to a life lived, and to begin to figure out what that loss means to the ones left behind. To provide a sacred space for the pain and grief. To establish the significance and unique aspects of a life lived. To catch our breath and begin the first shaky initial steps toward reconstructing a new reality. When a woman who was such a large presence in so many lives, is suddenly gone, and before anyone was ready, the need for a safe gathering of those who loved her, is even more necessary. It is in the tears and stories that each of you can find comfort and healing. So, we gather today, because that’s what people do.

These few moments are your time to reflect, to cry, to gather strength from each other and to carve a space in your heart for those memories to live on.

Washington Irving said, “There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief...and unspeakable love.”

As we begin our time together, let us take a moment to take deep breath and focus our hearts and minds on embracing memories as we open with a prayer.

Father of all mercies and God of all consolation,

You pursue us with untiring love, and dispel the shadow of death, with the bright dawn of life. Give courage to this family in their loss and sorrow. Be their refuge and strength, O Lord. Reassure them of Your continuing love, and lift them from the depths of grief, into the peace and light of Your presence. Your Son, our Lord Jesus Christ, by dying, has destroyed our death, and by rising, restored our life. Your Holy Spirit, our comforter, speaks for us in groans too deep for words.

Come alongside Your people, remind them of Your eternal presence,

and give them Your comfort and strength. Amen.

As we pause to listen to a song, please try to think of a memory of Rhonda, you might like to share with everyone, later in the service.

Song—Dear Mama by Tupac Shakur

Rhonda was born on June 17, 1962 in Phoenix, Arizona to Nora Mattox and the late Harold Mattox. Rhonda grew up with three siblings, Debbie, Mike and Chris. Rhonda was raised by her Granny and Grandpa. They were kind and loving, and she thought of them as her parents. Her Dad remained a constant presence in her life as well. She enjoyed school, but she stood her ground and earned a reputation as a fighter.

During her sophomore year of high school, she noticed a good-looking boy, named Joe, in the freshman class. Rhonda wrote a note, and gave it to her friend Annette to deliver to Joe. The note read, “meet me at the parking lot. Joe followed the instructions, and he was immediately attracted to her beautiful smile and bright green eyes. They spent hours talking, walking around campus, and sometimes went out to eat at McDonald’s. Rhonda and Joe got along so well, and they quickly fell in love. They continued dating throughout the remainder of high school. Joe and Rhonda were married on January 12, 1985.

While Rhonda was pregnant with their first child, Joey, she was involved in a serious car accident. Unfortunately, both of her patellas were severely injured. Over the coming years, she underwent multiple surgeries, including two total knee replacements. She suffered chronic pain and the loss of being able to easily move around.

She and Joe took the kids to California for summer vacation every year. They visited Disneyland, Sea World, Knott’s Berry Farm and swam at the beach. However, after Rhonda accidently swallowed a mouthful of seawater, hated ocean water! They also enjoyed numerous camping trips up north (with extended family) and went fishing up north at Whitehorse Lake.

Joe and Rhonda had a Monte Carlo and later got a Neon, and they were members of a Low Rider club called, New Identity. Rhonda loved listening to oldies songs; her family and friends remember her laughing, smiling, and dancing Cumbia’s while snapping her fingers along to the beat of the music.

Rhonda was truly the glue that kept her family together; some of the life lessons she taught were: no matter what happens, family sticks together, respect your elders and do not talk back, never hit first, and don’t judge people, because nobody’s perfect. She passed on her cooking skills and demonstrated the proper way to clean and do laundry. Rhonda was the peacemaker, and she didn’t allow hatred. When arguments erupted, she encouraged those involved to talk and hug it out!

Daughter, Nikki called, “genuine and very unique”. She gave her a place to stay, filled her belly with food and was easy to talk to. Nikki said, “even if she didn’t have it, she found a way to help”. Rhonda extended a hand to many others during her life as well. She took on the Mother role for whomever needed or wanted her love and support. She made it known that her home was a safe place to land, and that all were welcome.

Rhonda loved without conditions or judgement. While she was sad that her boys were incarcerated, she never missed a court hearing, phone call or a visit-no matter where they were located. She wanted her boys to feel connected and included in everything, so she made it a point to write to them every day.

Joey and Tony appreciated their Mom’s unconditional love and devotion. Rhonda especially loved poems, so it when she received poems and drawings from her boys, she proudly hung them on the wall, for everyone to see.

Everyone called her, “Mama Dukes” because she liked to fight. She and her Son-in-law, Lorenzo, had an inside joke, and because of that, he nicknamed her “bottom lip” and she called him “top lip”.

Rhonda was typically happy and incredibly kind hearted, but she sometimes had a temper as well. She didn’t have a lot of rules, but she expected everyone to clean up after themselves, and she hated when people came in the kitchen and ate, while she was cooking! Lorenzo could testify that she smacked him with a spatula, when he made that mistake!

Speaking of cooking, Rhonda was a fantastic cook; her family absolutely loved her red chili, green chili, fry bread and Spanish Rice. Once in a while, she burned the bottom of the rice, and they gave her a hard time about it! Joe often told her, “turn the burner down”! He also thought she needed to drain more of the grease when making tacos, because he kept getting heartburn!

Rhonda enjoyed eating at restaurants, and two of her favorite places were, Poncho’s Mexican Food and Pete’s Fish and Chips; she definitely had a sweet tooth, and happily savored Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, homemade cinnamon rolls, carrot cake and double strawberry ice cream.

Rhonda loved movies and some of her favorite were, Dirty Dancing, Grease, Boulevard Nights and Scarface. On television, she watched, The First 48, Love and Hip Hop, Families of the Mafia, 16 and Pregnant;

she liked many different shows, but she was a huge fan of Young and the Restless! Her kids laughed at the memory of telling Mom, “Aah, it’s 11 o’clock, turn it on channel 5!

Rhonda’s favorite perfume was “Lucky You”, she liked poems, coloring and word searches. She had a green thumb, and enjoyed growing indoor plants, and she collected angels and windchimes.

She was naturally beautiful and didn’t need makeup; on the rare occasions when she did put some on, she used very little. Rhonda kept the same hairstyle she’d had in high school. It was feathered, and God help anyone who touched it! The kids loved to mess with it, and get her all riled up, and Tony couldn’t resist touching it, while sitting behind her in the car!

She loved flowers, especially pink roses. Her favorite color was blue. She was easily pleased and didn’t care what gift she received-it could be a card or something handmade. She simply appreciated being acknowledged.

Eighteen years ago, Rhonda became the Godmother and Nana of Zackirius. She stayed by his mother, Nikki’s side, throughout her pregnancy and she and Tata were in the room during labor. Nikki’s husband passed out, but Tata was there to catch her baby boy.

Rhonda dealt with bad anxiety and she was in the emergency room at the same time her daughter, Christina was upstairs in labor. Rhonda put aside her struggling emotions, and insisted she be by her daughter’s side, so she was wheeled into the delivery room and was Christina’s cheer leader!

Rhonda loved being a mother, but she really shined as Nana. Grandson JoJo slept with Nana on many nights. She watched movies with them, made TikTok videos, colored, played with water guns and participated in water balloon fights. She took the grandkids to the park and spoiled them with candy. Her Granddaughter, Society said, “She taught me to clean, and I always helped her with everything.” As the little ones got older, she had no problem giving them a little crap too; she thought nothing of kicking her grandson, Joseph off the video game, Fortnite, so she could play Pac-Man on the play station!

Rhonda was an expert party planner! Every weekend and holiday she hosted friends and family at the house. She had so much fun playing quarters, and all her kids joined in. She enjoyed Bud Light or a Malibu and Pineapple drink. Lisa laughed while recalling the night she taught her Mom and Dad to play Beer Pong. Rhonda and Joe caught on so quickly-they actually beat her! New Year’s was her favorite holiday, and she traditionally cooked homemade menudo and tamales for the celebration. She had fun being goofy-not long ago, she put on Lisa’s shirt, added her bra on the outside and danced around (while being videotaped) just to get a laugh!

At this time, I would like to read a letter on behalf of Rhonda’s son-in-law, Lorenzo, also known as Chito.

“Momma Dukes was the greatest Mom you could ask for. She was more of a Mom to me than my won Mom ever was. She always worried for me and made sure I was safe. She always prayed for me and for that, she will be in my prayers every morning and night. I will cherish all the memories until God calls me home, and bottom lip and top lip meet again. Love always, Chito”

Joe and Rhonda were married for 35 years, and they would have celebrated 40 years of being together next January. They had fun and were always happy. During their marriage, they encountered many hurdles and difficulties, but they never considered separating or not staying together. At times, life was extremely hard, but they worked at it and had no regrets!

“Love isn’t always perfect

It isn’t a fairy-tale or a storybook.

And it doesn’t always come easy.

Love is overcoming obstacles,

facing challenges, fighting to be together,

holding on and never letting go.

It is a short word, easy to spell,

difficult to define, and impossible to live without.

Love is work, but most of all,

love is realizing that every hour, every minute,

and every second it was worth it,

because you did it together. ~Author Unknown

In honor of Rhonda and Joe’s love for one another, we’ll listen to a song.

Song— I Do Love You

Much of their stress stemmed from Rhonda’s health. The car accident affected her entire adult life. Not only did she have knee problems, but it also affected her hip. In 2005, she had two strokes. Rhonda never gave up-she just kept pushing herself. After Rhonda contracted MRSA in 2017, her life was thrown into total chaos, and she endured seven surgeries. She wasn’t one to complain, but being able to kick a ball or run around with her grandchildren, really started to wear on her. Throughout her life, Rhonda found a way to make it over every hurdle placed in her path. Recently, Rhonda got sick; she fought hard, just like she’d always done, but this time, her body was not strong enough, and she passed away after a brief bout of Covid-19.

At times of deep sorrow, sometimes the ancient words of scripture can offer some comfort. The well-known words of the 23rd Psalm are often quoted during services such as these. However, knowing the story behind the poetry, makes it even more powerful.

According to tradition, the words of gratitude were said to be written by David, the king of Israel. But, at this time of his life, David was not the powerful ruler sitting on his throne. He was on the run, being chased by enemies, hiding in a cave, afraid for his life; he was in a place he had never been before.

Sitting here, you are in a place you’ve never been before, so engulfed by sadness and loss. So, let these words speak to your heart in a new way. May it bless your hurting heart and seep into your soul.

The 23rd Psalm

The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures;

He leadeth me beside the still waters.

He restoreth my soul;

He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for His name’s sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil; for Thou art with me;

Thy rod and Thy staff, they comfort me.

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies;

Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life,

and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Amen.

When asked what she would miss the most about Rhonda being gone, Nikki said, “I’ll miss talking to her, and knowing she always had my back.” Her husband, Joe is going to miss his amazing and special wife. He gave her all his love. She will be missed by many friends as well. In fact, friends from as far back as high school, have shown up to help raise funds for her funeral by organizing car washes.

As our gathering comes to an end, and you prepare to leave, may you take the memory of Rhonda with you, tuck it in a special place in your heart, and never let her be forgotten. May you honor her life by extending a hand to all in need, finding joy and laughter every day,

making family time a priority, and not judging others. May you say what’s on your mind, never hit first, but fight when necessary, and love with all your heart, for the remainder of your life-just as Rhonda did.

Let us pray:

Heavenly Father,

we thank You that you have made each of us in Your own image, and given us gifts and talents with which to serve you. We thank you for Rhonda, the years we shared with her, the good we saw in her, and the love we received from her. Now, give us strength and courage to leave her in your care, confident in your promise of eternal life, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.