Theo Elliott Taylor

Theo Elliott Taylor died on April 22, 2013 at Hospice Atlanta Center after an extended illness. Theo was born in Monroe, NC, on August 29, 1927, the daughter of Parks and Clara Elliott. She was the loving, devoted wife of 56 years of Robert J. Taylor III, who preceded her in death on May 8, 2006. Theo grew up on a farm in the small Monroe community, and after graduating from high school, she attended college at WCUNC (Women’s College of the University of North Carolina) which is today UNC Greensboro. She moved to Atlanta in 1948 and met Bob in 1949. They were married in March of 1950. Theo and Bob were active members of Peachtree Road United Methodist Church, having joined the church and the Timothy Class in 1951. Theo remained active with the church and the Timothy Class until shortly before her death. Theo was also active in gardening and civic activities having been a long-term member of the Rose Garden Club and the Blackland Garden Club, and having served in several support activities with Peachtree Road United Methodist Church. Bob and Theo were also members since 1956 with the Georgia Appalachian Trail Club where their family enjoyed many camping, hiking and spelunking adventures. After Bob’s retirement from General Medical in 1980, Theo and Bob expanded their travels and made many interesting trips throughout the United States and the world, often heading up travel adventures and ski trips with their close Timothy Class members and other friends. Theo touched the lives of many. Her generous and kind heart inspired and comforted everyone. Theo was preceded in death by her sister Paxton Brewster and her brother Parks Elliott, Jr. Surviving members of her family include her three sons and their wives, Rob and Beth of Atlanta, Parks and Maleah of Johns Creek, Tom and Nancy of Greenville, SC; her daughter and son-in-law, Brenda and Arch Smith of Eatonton, GA; eight grandchildren, Sarah Taylor Vantine, with her husband Rich Vantine, and Susan Taylor; Calli and Layton Taylor; Jenny and Ellison Taylor; and Kristen and Daniel Smith; and one great grandchild, Taylor Vantine. She is also survived by her sister-in-law Jane Elliott; nephew and nieces, Vernon Kyle, Elizabeth Lodwick, Martha Lennington and Kathleen Lascelles, and many great nieces and great nephews. Visitation will be at H.M. Patterson & Son Arlington Chapel from 6:00 p.m. to 8:00 p.m. on Wednesday, April 24, 2013. Memorial services will be in the chapel of Peachtree United Methodist Church at 11:00 a.m. on Thursday, April 25, 2013. A reception will follow afterwards in the Hall of the Apostles. In lieu of flowers please make donations to Peachtree United Methodist Church at 3180 Peachtree Road, N.W., Atlanta, GA 30305; Hospice Atlanta Center through the Visiting Nurse Health System at 5775 Glenridge Drive, Suite E200, Atlanta, GA 30328; or a charity of one’s choice. Honor Mrs. Taylor by visiting www.mem.com to post your personal tribute. Arrangements by H.M. Patterson & Son-Arlington Chapel, 173 Allen Road N.E., Sandy Springs, GA 30328, 404-851-9900.

Eulogies for for Mrs. Theo Elliott Taylor

April 25, 2013

Peachtree Road United Methodist Church

Opening Comments (Rob Taylor)

My name is Rob Taylor and this is my youngest brother, Tom Taylor. On behalf of my brother Parks, my sister Brenda, and all of our families, we would all like to thank each of you for coming today. We particularly want to thank of all of our many friends and relatives, as well as the caregivers from LivHome, Lenbrook and Hospice Atlanta, for their support and assistance over the past several months during my mother's illness. There are too many of you to name individually, but your efforts are deeply appreciated.

We are all saddened by the passing of my mother. She will be sorely missed. But we are also thankful. Thankful for her long life and the support she always provided to her family and friends. Over the past several weeks we have had the chance to reflect on my mother's life and the lessons and guidance she provided. My brother and I would like to share those with you.

Value of Friends and Family (Tom Taylor)

How do you get a person with claustrophobia to go caving or to squeeze into a station wagon, with no air-conditioning, and 5 other people and a panting dog, and drive to California and back? For that matter, how do you take a mother of several young children to go on a Fall hike and end up in the middle of major snow storm on a mountain peak in the Smokies? Mother did these and many other things simply because of the love she had for her family and friends. She placed a high value on these relationships and enjoyed the time spent with these friends and family, regardless of the location.

Mother was also always quick to write a note to a friend or to pick up the phone and give someone a call. She was always interested in what concerned others. She kept up with birthdays and significant events and made sure we never overlooked something. She shared everyone’s troubles and was really the designated worrier in our family. She was quick to volunteer and help in all kinds of garden club events, church support activities and any other endeavor where her help was needed.

Teamwork (Rob Taylor)

Mom and Dad made a very effective team. When it came time to seek fashion advice, mother was the always the best pick. Actually, the only pick. If you needed help with calculus or an engineering problem, check with dad first. When you needed help with a social event or just needed some common sense advice, mother was your person. When it came time for punishment, you preferred mother but you usually had to meet with dad at some point. Dad was always the planner, but mom was the communicator. Dad was the adventurer, but mom tried to keep everyone reasonably safe, warm within passable tolerances and as well-fed as possible on these adventures. Together, the two of them worked hand in hand to keep their 4 rambunctious kids, and later their many friends, from getting into too much trouble. Their efforts made for some wonderful experiences and memories.

Communication (Tom Taylor)

Great day In the morning

I Swanee

His name is mud

Oh for heavens sake

I haven't heard peeturkey

gosh knows

Golly Pete

Oh lawsy

I'm so mad I could spit

He’s a pistol ball

These and other sayings would always spring up in conversations with mom. As many of you know, mom and her sister Paxton could speed talk. Not only could they talk a mile-a-minute, they could talk at the same time and somehow understand what the other was saying. To make it more interesting, they would frequently sprinkle in some of these expressions. Somehow, through her charisma and charm, you always knew what mother wanted to say and she could deliver it with the sweet softness of a summer breeze, or, as when she caught me at age 3 taking all her dirty laundry and putting it into the toilet, she could deliver it with a bit more zeal.

It was common that my mother would call her mother and sister several times a day. This is a conservative estimate. Each of them would in turn make contact with their respective family members to get updates and pass on information. Before the internet and facebook, these three were the communication hub through which all information in our family flowed. Our family’s version of the World Wide web.

Like all families, mother and dad argued on occasion, but their style of argument was unique. Both had some hearing impairment and both had a reluctance to listen to what the other was saying when trying to make their point. The arguments never lasted long and any ruffled feathers were quickly smoothed over and forgotten. As a result, their arguments were more for the entertainment of others in attendance or to serve as a form of announcement of our family’s late night arrival into a campground or boat anchorage.

Love of Animals (Tom Taylor)

I have yet to meet anyone else who had the menagerie of pets that we enjoyed as children. Dogs, birds, turtles, rabbits, gerbils, fish, snakes, squirrels, a couple of raccoons and a skunk for good measure were all residents of our house at one time or the other. In fact, Mom adopted some neighbor’s pets, and even a few families of wild raccoons, who all found that the food bowl was never empty at our house. Mom loved almost all of them (although it’s hard to love a snake) and she attempted to spoil each and every one. I don’t believe I have ever witnessed a more joyful re-union as when Mom found our beloved dachshund Fritzi after she had run away during a thunderstorm. Her compassion for animals was contagious and all of her children have a soft spot for our pets.

Adventure (Rob Taylor)

Mother, usually at my father’s prodding, loved to learn new things. For instance, they did not take up snow skiing or sailing until they were over 50 years old. Their enthusiasm for all these activities was infectious and they got lots of family and friends to join them as well, although not all of them were repeat customers. We had more than a few misadventures along the way, but almost everyone had a great time and there were always lots of stories to tell afterwards. Mother was always a willing participant and hard worker on these trips. My father’s frequent calling out to her created some confusion on sailing trips, however, where some people thought that the word “Theo” was some sort of nautical term. As chief cook (dad’s menu options were generally limited to peanut butter, your choice of fruit and a good helping of ice cream) mother on the other hand excelled in making delicious meals from what was available under often difficult conditions.

My mother and father also loved planning their exciting trips and adventures. They loved to include other family members and friends, mostly willing, in these adventures. My father was the planner, frequently spending days and weeks meticulously working on details, down to the time of the camel ride in the desert, with resulting itineraries that would make NASA and many a ship navigator blush. Mother’s role was to provide the voice of reason and to document all that occurred. These diaries have and will provide fun reading for future generations.

Summary (Rob Taylor)

In summary, we are a blessed family for mother’s presence in our lives. We will always remember her. I in particular will remember her wise counsel, her unwaivering support and her genuine interest in everything that I did. We will all remember her fun loving spirit, her kindness to all, her dedication to her church and her devotion to my father and all her family.

At this point I would like to introduce my oldest daughter Sarah who would like to share with you some of her thoughts.

Thoughts of Granddaughter Sarah Taylor

It's been such a privilege to have known such an amazing grandmother as Gran was. Gran was always such an inspiration, supportive caregiver, and loving friend in many aspects of my life. Over the years she has taught me so much that has shaped me into the person I am today. Over the last few days, I've reflected on some of the wonderful qualities that she has brought out in me over the years. Gran has taught me so much and I'd like to share some of the stories that highlight what an influential person she has been on my life.

Gran was always supportive and enthusiastic in everything her grandchildren did. From music, to band recitals, to artwork, Gran was always our biggest fan.

One of my favorite activities throughout my life has been art. For years I kept many sketch books and was always continuing to expand my creativity through drawing and painting. Gran was always a voice of encouragement and provided us with unwavering support for anything we were passionate about. She always made me feel like I could reach any goal and do anything I put my mind to. Through her I've learned that doing what you love most is one of the keys to feeling fulfilled in life.

Gran also taught me an avid appreciation for all of God's furry, and not so furry, creatures. As a child I always saw Gran feeding the neighborhood stray dogs and cats, and even though she could not stand when a squirrel would get on one of her bird feeders, she made sure to put a little bit of corn down for the squirrels too so they wouldn't be left out. Gran loved to point out all the different animals in the world and seeing her nurture and love so many different creatures gave me an appreciation and love for animals. To this day, if I come across an animal in need, I have an overwhelming need to feed and nurture it. This accounts for my two rescued chinchillas, a shelter cat, and a struggling pet store goldfish that I've adopted and welcomed into my home over the last few years. I credit Gran for instilling such a strong desire to care for and nurture any critter in need and I appreciate how she taught me to love and respect all animals -- even the not so furry ones.

One of the biggest lessons Gran taught me was to always look for the positive in any situation. I vividly remember being about 5 or 6 years old and getting a particularly nasty splinter in one of my fingers. I remember crying and crying because it hurt so bad and when my dad decided that he was going to remove it with some menacing looking tweezers, I remember feeling panicked and certain that the pain potentially inflicted from the tweezers would be way worse than having the splinter in my finger. Gran sat me down in the kitchen and lovingly reassured me that everything would be fine and to make everything better, I could have a lollipop if I was brave and let Dad use the tweezers to pull the splinter out. After Gran gave me the lollipop, everything was instantly better about the situation. Gran always had a wonderful way of turning something that seemed scary or unpleasant into something that you could overcome and feel better about in the end. It's this quality that has given me so much hope in situations where it does not seem like there could be any. It’s with this that I know her passion, her nurturing spirit, and her ability to see the good in any situation will live on through us as we continue in life. Gran will be sorely missed, but her spirit, love, and positive outlook will remain with those whose lives she touched.

And now I’d like to introduce the next speaker, a close friend of my grandparents, Nancy Brewer.

Thoughts of Close Friend, Nancy Brewer

I am Nancy Brewer. Thank you Rob, Brenda, Parks and Tom for allowing me to share some of my very special memories of my long-time close friend, your Mom, Theo. In the early years of the newly formed Timothy Class here at Peachtree Road Methodist Church the members were young married couples just starting a family. We had a “Cradle Committee,” and Mary Ellen Thatcher and I visited Theo in 1955 when the Taylors lived on Dellwood near E. Rivers School. We invited Theo and Bob to join our class, which they did, and thus began our friendship of 58 years. Theo’s mother, Mrs. Elliott, lived nearby, and was our favorite Baby sitter.

Theo was fearless. She entered enthusiastically with all the activities Bob could dream up, and all that her children wanted to do – she camped out, hiked, spelunked, travelled. Our first travel adventure with the Taylors was a week-long sailing trip with Bob and Theo and two of their children, Brenda and Tom, in the Caribbean. We rented a 48 ft. sailboat and we were bare boating, meaning Bob was our Captain, and we all were “crew.” Spencer and I had never been on open water, and were the poorest excuses for “crew,” but Bob was determined to teach all of us some navigation skills, as well as how to drop an anchor, set sail and wrap the sails. It was a hard job being master of the ship, but after a few frantic “THEO’S,” which might mean we were about to ground on a sand bar (or scrape a coral reef), we had a wonderful time. We even walked on Mustique Island where Princess Margaret used to vacation. What an adventure it was for us all!

That was the beginning of our travels with Theo and Bob. We visited them in their condominium in Dillon, Colorado in the winter where we about froze to death cross country skiing and Theo was so far ahead of us on the mountain. We could not keep up with her. Another time in the summer we drove with them across country, sightseeing, to Dillon. We travelled with our son, Theo and Bob through Australia and New Zealand. One New Year’s Eve we motored by boat down the Inland Waterway from Savannah to St. Simon’s Island. We toured South Africa with them and made at least two trips to visit and tour the Submarine Base at King’s Bay, GA – once with their children and 8 grandchildren. Theo kept grand diaries of all her trips. These records will be read by her grandchildren as a true inspiration for high adventure.

After that week of close living in the boat on the Caribbean, when I saw her the next day or two at home, she said “Miss you!” That was Theo’s way of saying, let’s plan another trip, soon! I will always remember that sweet greeting. What a fun-loving and beautiful person she was. “Miss you, Theo.”

Thoughts of Granddaughter Kristen Smith

Hello, my name is Kristen Smith and I am the only daughter of Brenda Smith, who is Bob and Theo’s only daughter. Today we are honoring the life of my sweet Gran, so I’d like to share something personal with you that I wrote to her 7 years ago shortly before my Papa (Bob Taylor) passed away. As you all may know, Gran and Papa were married for 56 years and had a love for one another that is as true as any love can be. As you can imagine, Gran was having a difficult time throughout Papa’s illness, and so I wrote her this letter hoping to provide some comfort and support during that time. Now that the time has come for Gran to leave us and join Papa, I found myself thinking of that letter written so long ago – and so I will share that with you now:

“April 17, 2006

Dear Gran, It was great seeing you on Easter! The reason I am writing this letter is because I can’t find the words to say in person…I just want you to know that I understand that you are scared and feel alone. But Gran, you are not alone…you never have been and you never will be. We (our family) will always be here for you.

What is happening to Papa is terrible and heartbreaking to say the least. But Gran, do you remember how you told me you thought of all that is happening with Papa as the same thing a butterfly must go through? He has grown tired and slow in his caterpillar body, but Gran when he finally comes out of his cocoon he’ll be the most beautiful butterfly you have ever seen, and I’m sure he will always be near by watching over you and the rest of us.

I love you Gran! I know you are hurting right now, just know that we are here for you and Papa through it all. I love you always! - Kristen”

I know at this moment Gran is looking down on us all, hand-in-hand with Papa, smiling. I pray that she never felt alone as I promised her she would never be, and I hope that she always knew and felt the depth of our love for her. Although we will all miss her so terribly, I know that she too has become the most beautiful butterfly any of us could ever imagine. And so to close, I will end by sharing the final line of the letter, which I wrote for Papa (shortly before his death), by saying:

“I’m not sure how to end this letter because “good-by” seems too final. So no matter what comes, I will see you later, and I can hardly wait! I love you always & forever!”

Thank you.