Mrs. Margaret Day (Howard) Gould

When asked to share his thoughts on my Grandma, my brother Tyler wonderfully summed her up with these thoughtful words: I think I’d like people to know that for me, she epitomized what it meant to be a Grandma. She was always there for all of us, particularly Meg and I, with any activity we were doing. We knew we could call her if we were stuck and she would be there in a heartbeat. She didn’t force life lessons on us but taught us what it meant to love animals and be a good friend. No matter what activity or sport or “thing” we were doing, it was like she automatically had our backs in it. From hockey to dance to aerating her lawn even, we could count on her to support us. She was always referring to people by their first name and assuming we knew them, which often made me laugh. She always seemed to be doing something for someone. She was quietly influential by treating people well wherever we went together. She was insanely tough and I always remember her having a sense of humour when she was going through something difficult, which I try to emulate. That’s how I’ll remember her impact on me.

Grandma was born on May 13, 1934 in Quebec City. Being born into a well to do family, she was raised by nannies who only spoke French and consequently Grandma spoke no English until the family moved to Ottawa. She attended Havergill College, a private girls school until she moved back to Montreal, to attend McGill University. At this time, she tragically lost her mother to a long and hard fought battle with cancer. Grandma was just 19 years old. However, the silver lining was that her boyfriend at the time, who was Grandpa’s best friend, failed to show up for the funeral and in his place, Grandpa gallantly stepped in and supported her…and you all know how that story ended!

Grandma always laughed that she flunked out of university because she could not pass first year calculus ( twice!! ) but that lead her to Notre Dame Secretarial School. Grandma and Grandpa married on June 18, 1955 in Montreal. She put her secretarial skills to good use to support Grandpa while he attended McGill to earn his medical degree. Their first son James was born in 1957 and shortly afterwards Grandpa and Grandma moved to Flint, Michigan for Grandpa’s internship. In 1959, a pregnant Grandma went into labour while Grandpa was working, so she left James with the neighbours and walked by herself across the field to the hospital to give birth to daughter Carolyn. The next move was to Cleveland for Grandpa’s residency program in 1960, where son John was born. Grandpa and Grandma piled three young children, a bowlful of fish and hundreds of pounds of medical textbooks in the car and headed to Sault Ste. Marie for a year. Well, that year stretched into 60 years and resulted in a wonderful life of family and friends and all of us here today to celebrate this amazing woman.

Making a life in Sault Ste. Marie meant that Grandma involved herself in organizations that were dear to her. St. Luke’s Cathedral became Grandpa and Grandma’s spiritual home and being tone deaf and unable to carry a tune, joining the choir with Grandpa was not an option! So Grandma taught Sunday School, ran the Junior Girls Auxiliary and joined the Altar Guild, being its president for a number of years. Many a Dean has been “told off” for spilling red wine on the fair linen on the altar when it was Margaret’s week to work!!! Once females were allowed to join, Grandma also became a Sides Person, greeting everyone by name as she handed them a bulletin. Being a “choir Mother” she drove Jim and John to choir practice after school on Tuesdays for years and helped corral boisterous choristers on choir trips to England. She always sat in the front pew, right in front of the pulpit so she could give the boys the evil eye if they were misbehaving during the sermon and hers was the first smile they saw as they processed down the aisle.

As you all know animals, dogs in particular, were near and dear to Grandma’s heart. This led her to actively participate in the Sault Ste. Marie Kennel Club and Humane Society, holding positions in both organizations. Having survived breast cancer, Grandma became a visitor to women about to undergo a mastectomy, offering support, advice and compassion. Walking in the survivors lap of the Relay for Life Marathon each year was a badge of honour for Grandma.

Making a life in Sault Ste. Marie, also meant creating a large circle of friends. Being an only child, Grandma made friends easily and kept them for life, keeping in touch by dropping by for coffee, calling on the phone or later texting. Shirley Hunt was her first friend in the Soo, living down the street on Coulson Avenue. The two of them would be lifelong buddies who could talk for hours! The Bowers family; Dorothy, Dennis, Susan and Peter, remain dear to both Grandpa and Grandma. From stays on Squirrel Island, to many choir and church activities, to Christmas brunches to boating trips to cruises down canals in England, the Bowers have been the extended family she loved dearly. When Grandpa and Grandma moved to Pathways in April last year, someone asked Grandma what she missed most and she replied not her house or her things but her neighbourhood and community around 57 Drake St. She missed seeing her neighbours of several decades and knowing what was happening in their lives. Grandma just loved being around people, her people, and always knowing that they could count on each other for support and friendship.

Cruising around the world from Alaska to Panama to the Caribbean and Europe with Lawrence and Joyce Robertson, Pam and Art Day, Dorothy and Dennis Bowers and Frank and Marg Hart was a highlight in Grandma’s later years. She always came home with stories about the laughs and good times everyone had. ( and from some of the inside jokes they would share in Carolyn’s presence, she was sure she was only hearing the cleaned up version of those stories!!!)

Although her later years saw Grandma spend a lot of time in the hospital she made friends with all the nurses, doctors and care staff. She hated if they put her in a private room – that was boring! – she wanted a ward room because then she had three other people to talk to! She always said if you smile at someone and speak kindly, they will do the same to you. By the second day of her stay she would know her roommates’ life story and who all their visitors were! Even in her last days the family was comforted by the kind comments from many nurses who remembered Grandma fondly from her earlier stays.

Anyone who knew Grandma, knew what an animal lover she was. Once the family settled in the Soo, Grandpa and Grandma started their menagerie with a standard black poodle named Celeste, quickly followed by Siamese cats Yum-Yum and Kate. At one point Grandma was even breeding guinea pigs for the Noah’s Ark Pet Store! She then moved on to fostering mother cats with their litter of newborn kittens for the Humane Society. When the mother cats needed a respite from their kittens, they would escape to sit with Grandma in the family room. When it was time to return the animals to the Humane Society, Grandma knew the mothers faced a certain death sentence and, of course, would bring that mother home to join the menagerie. The Humane Society came to rely on Grandma in her later years as they sought homes for older dogs who were nearing the end of their lives. Grandma took these dogs in, filling their final days with love and compassion. Not only did she look after animals for the Humane Society but she took any opportunity she could to dog sit for friends and family. Grandma even took a puppy, Kanon for Service Dogs of Canada, training him for the first year before returning him to the academy for further training. When Kanon’s placement didn’t work out they offered him back to Grandma who of course, took him in. When she was burned so badly in the boat accident the doctors said she survived because she had the body of a woman half her age, even though she never “worked out”, but just walked dogs because they needed the exercise. John had a Globe and Mail paper route and the papers would be delivered around noon each day.

Since Grandma was walking dogs anyway, she started taking the papers with her and ended up delivering them most days. Not only did she get good exercise from this but she also got to build relationships with her neighbours/customers. She was so sad when John gave up his route because she would miss all her “regulars”! Grandma and Grandpa continued to have four legged children until well into their late seventies.

Grandma was a huge sports fan, watching a wide variety from figure skating to curling to CFL football to Premier League soccer to golf to hockey. She followed the Greyhounds and often knew their out of town scores before Rich and Carolyn did! She was a super fan of my brother Tyler’s hockey games. She and my Grandma Evoy wouldn’t miss a game. It was amazing how they could yak through the entire game and still follow the action! She was really sad when Tyler moved away to play hockey and she could no longer go to his games. I remember that she loved driving my friends and I to dance classes throughout high school and I think she knew more teenage girl gossip than our parents did!!

While David worked many hours at the hospital and office, Margaret kept the house and family on track. She was the glue that held everything together and running smoothly. Throughout the years, even though family members moved away, Grandma always kept in touch and kept track of what everyone was up to either in the form of snail mail, phone or text. She was so proud of all the accomplishments of her grandchildren, myself, Tyler, Patricia, David and Rudie. Grandma always made sure everyone felt welcome and a part of the family right from the get go. Auntie Rowena, Uncle Bruce, Derek and Kori were subjected to Grandma’s wicked sense of humour, love and compassion, just like the rest of us.

The family spent twelve summers at Bootjack Ranch in Priceville Ontario. They would ride horses twice everyday and care for the animals. The same families would book the ranch year after year and they always looked forward to seeing old friends again.

There was swimming in the pond, rowboats to row, frogs to catch, tin cans to shoot off of fence posts as well as horses to groom. By the time Jim was fifteen he would spend summers working on the ranch, which led to a lifelong career with horses. Grandma always enjoyed their two week stays, especially when they would go into town to the Scottish bakery and come home with fresh bread and butter tarts for lunch!

Last night when the whole family got together, it was evident that Grandma had left a lasting impression on all of us and some recurrent themes and funny stories came to light. First, we all realized that her feisty attitude resulted in her often giving us the middle finger. But doing it with a smile on her face, to make us laugh and gape at the same time! And we all had a good laugh at the famous pecan pie episode, whereby she baked a delicious looking pecan pie for guests that Grandpa literally could not get an axe through! Needless to say, that was the last pecan pie she ever made.

To sum up my Grandma in a few short words would be an impossible task. She was a fighter, a survivor, a wife, a mother, a grandma, a friend, a champion of animals and most importantly, she was an amazing and loving woman who touched the lives of anyone she met. Whenever I used to ask her about her life and all that she had been through and accomplished, she always responded to me with “My cup runneth over”. So in closing today, and on behalf of my Grandma, I hope that all of your cups runneth over for many years to come, just like hers.

“What we once enjoyed and deeply loved we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes part of us. “ Helen Keller

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GOULD, Margaret Day - It is with profound sadness that the family of Margaret Day Gould (Howard) announce her passing at the Sault Area Hospital on Friday, January 31, 2020.

Beloved wife of Dr. David H. Gould and cherished mother of James (Anne), Carolyn Evoy (Richard) and John (Diane). Proud and loving grandmother of Megan (Derek) and Tyler Evoy (fiancée Kori Wickstrom), Patricia and David Gould and Rudie Gould. Margaret was a lifelong animal lover and many cats, dogs and guinea pigs enjoyed bountiful and loving lives in her care. She will be greeted at the Rainbow Bridge by all her furry children and missed by her fur grandbabies Remi and Gally. Margaret was a lifelong member of the St. Luke’s Altar Guild. Her wry sense of humour and welcoming smile were witnessed by the many new friends she made when she recently moved to Pathways Retirement Residence. Family and friends are invited to visit at the Arthur Funeral Home - Barton & Kiteley Chapel on Monday, February 3, 2020 from 11:30 am to 1:30 pm. Memorial service at St. Luke’s Cathedral at 2 pm. Rev. James McShane officiating. Inurnment St. Luke's Columbarium following the service. In lieu of flowers, donations (payable by cheque) to either the Humane Society or Sault Area Hospital Foundation would be greatly appreciated by the family. The family would like to acknowledge the excellent and compassionate care Margaret received at the Sault Area Hospital and from Jennifer, her PSW at Pathways. Special thanks to Dr. L. Castellani and Dr. D. Costain for your dedicated care over the years.

“What we once enjoyed and deeply loved we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes part of us. “ Helen Keller