Helen Ruth Besecker

HELEN RUTH ANGEL BESECKER left this realm peacefully on May 7, 2016 at the age of 81, surrounded by loving family in her longtime SeaTac area home, after valiantly enduring several years of a relatively unknown disease (Tauopathy Cortical Basal Ganglionic Degeneration with Primary Progressive Aphasia). Her family would like to thank her wonderful Hospice team (especially Kendra and Monica), who treated her with sympathy and dignity, for which we will be eternally grateful.

Helen was born on November 21, 1934 in Andrews, NC, to Ruth (16) and Thornton (20) Angel. At the age of 4, the young family (which now included her 2-year-old sister, Betty) moved to Skagit Valley Washington so her mother could be closer to her parents and siblings who had moved here to work in the logging industry. Helen was an incredibly intelligent and compassionate little girl. When her sister and cousin contracted German Measles when she was 8 years old, she risked her health to entertain them. She would read to the surreptitiously, thinking to avoid discovery by putting a blanket over their heads and using a flashlight to read by. Unfortunately, her subterfuge did not fool her parents. But she was undeterred – getting caught time after time; she was determined to comfort her baby sister and cousin. By the way, she never contracted the measles – even later in life when two of her daughters contracted the measles (before there were shots) she never was infected.

Helen met her future husband, Thomas James Besecker, Jr., when Tom’s best friend wanted him to meet a girl he was interested in, and wanted to ask out on a date. They went to the diner where she worked, and Tom first laid eyes on HELEN. He told his friend that she was not anything special, and he shouldn’t waste his time dating her. The next day, Tom went back to the diner and asked her out for date himself. Apparently, Tom was rather a catch, and so she immediately accepted. But she later told us, she was not completely impressed, because he was a bad tipper (she was a waitress, after all).

When Helen was a senior at Arcata High School in California, her English teacher set an assignment for each of her students to write to a company and tell them how they could improve their business. Helen wrote to the local phone company and told them how they could be improved. At some point after that, she received a letter from that company. Her mother, wondering why the phone company was writing to her daughter, opened the letter and read it. The company was offering Helen a job as soon as she graduated. By this point, she had received three college scholarship offers, so her mother did not want to give her the letter from the phone company, but her father convinced her mother that it was Helen’s decision. After reading the letter, Helen decided to work at the phone company immediately, and so she turned down the scholarships . When she retired from US WEST in Seattle, in 1990, she had climbed the corporate ladder steadily, and was a human resources supervisor. Ironically, within five years of her retirement, US WEST had changed their policies, and only people with “college educations” could have management positions. An obviously archaic mindset (it is probably unrelated that US West no longer exists).

One thing we would like to make crystal clear about HELEN RUTH ANGEL BESECKER, is that she was a feminist her entire life. She was a feminist before it was popular, and when it became a big movement, I remember she and Tom being perplexed by how controversial it was, those women were known as man haters and bra burners. They simply lived it. Tom was the love of her life. However, she loved working outside the home, and it didn’t occur to Tom to tell her that he preferred her to stay home. She would cook dinner when she got home from work (it wasn’t like he had to come home and there was no meal on the table). (Just to be clear on another point, Helen thought those women who burned their bras were “damned idiots.” She knew, as should have been obvious to everyone, if you didn’t keep “the girls” supported that by the time you turned 50 (if you were lucky), they would be hanging down to your belly button, and things only went south from there.) And While her husband, Tom, attended Humboldt State College (now University), Helen worked for the phone company. Tom’s mother baby sat their oldest children Teri (4-7) and Susan (2-5) for free as her contribution to her son’s college education. After Tom graduated college in 1963, the family moved to Seattle, so he could go to work at Boeing. In 1968, after their daughter, Janet, started school, Helen began working for the phone company in Seattle – Pacific Northwest Bell. In August of 1969 she had to go on maternity leave again; this time for her beloved son, Thomas James Besecker, III. After Tom was “laid off” (we use quotations, because not many of those in management who were laid off were ever actually brought back) from Boeing in the infamous “lay off of 1969” (You know – the last one out of Seattle turn out the lights), we moved from Seattle to Aberdeen, WA where Tom was able to find work. Fortunately, the family was able to move back to Seattle in May of 1973, at which point Helen went back to work at Pacific Northwest Bell and worked for that company, which had become her career – through the divestiture – into US WEST, until she retired in 1990.

Helen truly enjoyed her retirement. She loved suntanning out on her deck, reading books for hours on end, shopping, and visiting her children and grandchildren, and having them come visit her. After Tom retired, they travelled and enjoyed each other – as they were the loves of each other’s lives.

To those that loved her, she will always be remembered curled up with a good book, cooking up a fantastic meal, hosting holiday get-togethers or in the midst of her family -- laughing and telling stories. Her SeaTac area home was somewhat of a “hub” for the Besecker family gatherings and she enjoyed the company of close friends and family who were always welcome to “drop in” anytime for a visit. Helen was preceded in death by her beloved husband of 47 years, Thomas. She is survived by her children Teri (husband Russell Esses), Susan, Janet (husband Robert Carlson), Tom (known to the family as Butch) her sister, Betty; her brother-in-law, Charlie, her 2 nieces, 8 grandchildren and 3 great-grandchildren.

Services will be held at the Riverton Crest Cemetery on Thursday, May 19 at 2:00 pm.