Elayne Berkowitz

Elayne was truly a gently soul, soft-spoken, always with a smile on her face. She was content to be the one making things happen in the background, letting her beloved husband (of blessed memory) William “Bill” Berkowitz, be in the spotlight. She didn’t mind that Bill got all of the accolades; but their family and friends knew that her strength was in being the support system that allowed everyone in her orbit to succeed and live their best life.

Her parents Hannah & David Seplowitz, like many Jews in the 1920’s, emigrated from Poland to the Bronx, NY. Elayne was born December 10, 1936 and grew up on Fairmont Place. Her younger brother Barry (of blessed memory) followed 4 years later, and added love and laughter to their family. Elayne liked to say she was born on the “second candle of Hanukkah.’ That seemed just right as she was the light of Bill’s life. They met in 1950 when Elayne was 14 and Bill was 16. Bill was at Elayne’s Sweet Sixteen, high school & college graduations; Elayne was at Bill’s high school & college graduations and was the Sweetheart of Alphi Phi Omega, Bill’s fraternity at NYU. They were together for 74 of Elayne’s 88 years. They were truly soulmates.

Besides Bill, her greatest joy was being there for her children, Dr. Gregg Berkowitz and Suzanne Fruithandler, their spouses Pamela Berkowitz and Robert Fruithandler and grandchildren - Alyssa, Andrew (Bre), Lindy, Julia & Chase - who lovingly called her “Bubby.” Bubby Elayne always showed up for them wherever, whenever, and as soon as she was needed, neatly dressed in her vast array of Merch from their school plays, sports teams, colleges, and more. Her hair would be neatly coiffed, nails perfectly polished, wearing festive holiday-appropriate earrings, fun lapel pins, bright lipstick and her “Bubby” necklace.

Elayne was a brilliant student, graduating Theodore Roosevelt High School at 16 after completing all Honors classes, then City College of New York at 19. The first in her family to attend college, she completed her BS in Education in 1957, followed by a Masters in Education in 1962 (which she worked towards while pregnant with Gregg, and completed when he was a newborn), then taught 1st and 4th grade in East Harlem, NY. At a time when New York required women to take a minimum of 4 years off per child with no guaranteed job to come back to, she balanced raising her children, being active in her synagogue, Bellmore Jewish Center, and going back to school, completing a M.S. in Special Education and a Post-Graduate Special Certification in Compensatory Learning, both at C.W. Post/LIU. After working as a reading specialist in Freeport and Massapequa, NY, she found her home at Ocean Avenue Elementary in East Northport, NY as a Compensatory Learning Specialist until her retirement in 1995. At Ocean Avenue, she was known for her commitment to her students, her diagnostic acumen and insight, and determination in setting up her students for future success. She was an amazing role model of the determination and hardwork it took for a woman to succeed in her time, and for how to build an engaging and fulfilling life.

As teachers, Elayne and Bill used their summers off to work at summer camps - Spruce Hill, Trupin, Stony Clove and Timberlake - which afforded Gregg and Suzanne the opportunity for amazing summers doing the things they loved. Elayne was a fantastic counselor and “camp mother” to many boys and girls from 1956 to 1979, looking after them and being a surrogate mother, especially to the younger ones - reading them nightly bedtime stories, bathed once in a while, and ensuring they weren’t homesick.

Elayne was creative, completing many beautiful needleworks in needlepoint, embroidery, bargello and other techniques and took deep pride in decorating her and Bill’s home of 61 years on Centre Avenue in Bellmore, NY. She was a wonderful hostess, especially when hosting Jewish holiday dinners with the entire extended Berkowitz and Seplowitz families and made possibly the best chicken soup with matzo balls any Jewish mother has ever made. She was ahead of her time, taking Assertiveness Training classes in the 1970’s, yoga classes on Saturdays for many years, and making and serving “health foods” at a time when processed foods were beginning to make their way into family meals. She loved to read and learn, be with their dear friends in Bellmore, wear anything of Southwestern design or her many colorful track suits, pins, pins, and more pins, but most especially being beside Bill.

Although not an adventurous person by nature, for Bill and her family, Elayne would try anything - including horseback riding at Rocking Horse Ranch, skiing at the Concord Hotel and riding the Matterhorn at Disney (although that one she would only do once). She enjoyed playing tennis in her many long-time women’s groups, book clubs and Mah Jongg. She also spent many years taking good care of her parents as they aged.

Once retired, Bill and Elayne loved to travel, both near and far - from their annual days at the US Open, to visiting Wimbledon, the Australian Open and many foreign countries, exploring the US and its National Parks, and of course frequent visits to their grandkids and extended family. Elayne was very committed to Judaism, Jewish and Yiddish culture and was an active and engaged member of The Bellmore Jewish Center (Congregation Beth Ohr) from its beginning. Alongside Bill, they were most dedicated to their beloved Hazak family at BJC, which they created 25 years ago as a place for old and new friends to meet, gather regularly for fun and companionship and enjoy opportunities for lifelong learning through game days, speakers, musical events, local trips to museums, multi-day bus trips to other cities in the Northeast, cultural and historical organizations - and most importantly to keeping “yiddishkeit” alive. They started with a group of about 20 friends and with the assistance of all their old and new Hazak friends, grew it to 250 seniors at its height. BJC/Hazak was truly their second home and second family.

For the last few years of their lives, Elayne and Bill moved up to Stamford to be closer to their children. They greatly enjoyed taking part in so many activities at Waterstone and made many wonderful friends.

In addition to her children and grandchildren, Elayne is survived by her sister-in-law, Iris Seplowitz; brother-in-law Ken Berkowitz, most special cousin, Pearl Resnick; dear friend May Massa and many cousins, nieces, nephews, and fellow Hazak-niks.

A graveside service will be held on Monday, December 30, 2024 at 11:30am at Mount Hebron Cemetery in Kew Gardens Hills, NY. It will be available on Zoom here: https://us02web.zoom.us/j/87819492827?pwd=Apevi5j5SX20f3q7FaYoHKxEteENGl.1

Meeting ID: 878 1949 2827, Passcode: 131569

On Tuesday, 12/31, from 4-6pm, a Zoom shiva/virtual gathering will be held to celebrate her life and share memories, with prayers at 5:30pm. Please join for all or any part. https://us02web.zoom.us/j/83143428400?pwd=nW8voRZqscC2aTsdgalJ7NbnwUqO1p.1

Meeting ID: 831 4342 8400, Passcode: 177147

Her children are grateful to their families and close friends for helping them through this difficult time. They are also forever grateful to the selfless caregivers, especially Nadine Thompson, who made Elayne’s last year and last few weeks more comfortable, navigable and enjoyable. There is hardly a greater gift than their selfless care of our dear Elayne.

Donations in Elayne’s memory would be greatly appreciated and can be made to: Bellmore Jewish Center/Congregation Beth Ohr (https://www.cbohr.org/), Yiddish Book Center (https://shop.yiddishbookcenter.org/) or Temple Beth El/Stamford https://www.tbe.org/.