Marian Schmied

First I will tell a little of her history.

She was born in the town of Schwabach, near Nurnberg in southern Germany. Her descendants from her father’s side were Sephardic Jews who came from Spain in the 1500’s, from where they had to flee religious persecution, and they settled in northern Germany. Mom’s aunt and uncle had children with whom Mom played and it was a very nice childhood for her. Her father, Henry Herz, had a lumber yard.

In 1934, Mom’s father decided to leave Germany because of the rising threat of the Nazis and Mom and her parents went to Palestine, now Israel, and settled in the town of Herzliya, near Tel Aviv. Mom loved Palestine, where she learned Hebrew and English (since Palestine was then an English Protectorate). But in 1941 her father decided to go to St. Louis in the United States where there were established relatives. The trip by sea was extremely dangerous and yet exciting for her, going through the Suez Canal, avoiding bombing by the Italians and then German submarines. This was a roundabout route, avoiding the more dangerous North Atlantic crossing. The ship made stops in Africa and South America, and she visited places that fascinated her. After this trip, I suppose nothing much could faze her, and it probably influenced her later love of travel.

Mom and her parents first stayed in Long Island City, NY and after 6 weeks moved to St. Louis and then a small town nearby where her father raised cattle. After working as a Health Dept. technician, she studied at Washington University where she met my father Ernest from Vienna, both German-speaking Jewish immigrants. Mom studied Chemistry and Biology, and Dad studied Electrical Engineering; he later became a notable engineering consultant, traveling all over the world. After they finished college and my father finished a short tour with the US army in Germany, they were married in 1946. Dad went to NYC for an engineering job, staying in Weehawken, New Jersey across the Hudson River. Mom cared for her mother who was dying from metastatic cancer, then came to NYC to join Dad in Weehawken. Then Dad’s parents came to NYC and bought the house in Woodside, Queens, that my parents and and grandparents stayed in for the rest of their lives. I was born there at 37-62 63rd Street in 1950.

Mom held many interesting jobs: as a medical lab worker, a secretary with a publisher, an assistant in the Department of Reptiles and Amphibians at the American Museum of Natural History, working near live poisonous snakes and other strange animals. The snakes were mostly beautiful. After that Mom settled down to her career as a teacher, first in chemistry/biology in junior high school, and then at Brooklyn Technical High School as a Chemistry teacher during the 1970’s and 1980’s.

I’d like to say a little about how Mom influenced me.

Most of us know Mom from her later years. But she had a tremendous influence on my character, and my interests. She was an avid tennis player, and so am I. She was a devoted science teacher, and my career was in biology and biochemistry. She loved classical music, and so do I. She played the accordion in her youth and later the piano, and I still play the violin. Her passion for travel, however, I have not followed in my later years: I hope I can make up for that.

Random memories come to my mind all the time now, of which I will give a sampling.

She takes me to tennis lessons under the Triborough Bridge in Astoria Park, and then she hits with me. I remember the instructor was a one-eared man named Armand Ferrara. When I am older Mom and I play together as doubles partners at a tennis club.

I remember her teaching me the intricacies of chemical valences and how to combine atoms. I had a great advantage over other students in high school chemistry. As the years passed, I kind of followed in her footsteps, training in Biological Sciences, but I took longer to complete studies and lab work and gain a PhD.

There are many memories of vacation trips with Mom to wonderful European cities like Paris, Madrid, Moorish Granada, these alone with her, other times also with my father. Many of my memories are happy learning experiences like the intricate geometric Moorish artwork and then of course the painting and sculpture artwork in the Paris Louvre and Madrid Prado. By the way, speaking of art, Mom very much enjoyed painting still lifes in her earlier years here in Queens. She also did enameling of earrings and bowls and ashtrays. I may be able to find her old kiln and some works hidden in some closet in the basement.

I remember my many violin lessons in the Jackson Heights shop of Professor Messinger, after which she would treat me to the big hamburgers of the Hamburger Express restaurant nearby, where the hamburgers were delivered by a miniature railroad. Those hamburgers have never been equalled. They were nothing like McDonalds.

Mom loved food and cooking, and she was a great cook, especially German specialties: sauerbraten, wienerschnitzel, delicately cooked filet of sole; lebkuchen or gingerbread cookies for example. If you have taken care of her lately, you know her abiding love of Pfannkuchen or German pancake. Until the end, Mom almost always had a good appetite, and she was calm and happy while eating with her caretakers..

Mom traveled on business trips with Dad, who was a highly respected Electrical Engineer who designed electrical installations in United States cities and places all over the world such as Saudi Arabia, Egypt, Iran, South Korea, Italy, the Vatican, Singapore. But the most special place for Mom and Dad was their vacation home on the small Caribbean island of Montserrat, starting in the early 1970’s. Mom made many great friendships there that carried over into the United States. Montserrat has many unique memories: the volcanic black-sand beaches; the suppers of Mountain Chicken (actually a giant frog); the ancient grass tennis court in the middle of Plymouth, the capital, with its irregular bounces; the weekly dances at the VuePointe Hotel, where I would be a little uncomfortable without a little of the rum punch to get me moving. The roundabout driveway of their house was where I learned to drive on a stick-shift, with some complaints by a neighbor of the grinding gears. And I learned to scuba dive first in our own pool and then in the warm tropical ocean over the coral reefs. However the best times for me were after I married Helen and she could come with us to London, Singapore, and Montserrat. But it was sad when we had to stop going to Montserrat because of the ash fall from the Soufriere Hills volcano in 1995.

In the early 2000’s my parents vacationed in Puerto Rico, where my father suddenly died and was cremated there in 2006. It is my plan to bring them together again, soon now.

Mom had a fun-loving, adventurous spirit and she made many good friends wherever she went. At younger ages there were teacher, travel, and tennis friends, then water aerobics and bridge friends, and in later years just eating out friends. I was able to call some of them to inform them of her passing, and they all told me of her warmth, enthusiasm, and brightness amid their sadness.

Starting from 2015, Mom had many caregivers who helped her, first with household chores, later with activities of daily living as she got older and finally succumbed to Alzheimer’s. Mom had a special relationship with Marlyn Manzano in the last 6 years. Marlyn was a good friend and motivator, energizing Mom and keeping her as safe and healthy as possible. She was also able to organize many other kind and capable aides. Mom was also extremely lucky to have on call my dear brilliant wife Helen, a nurse of enormous practical and medical experience, who now is the owner of a Certified Nursing Assistant school. Helen has come through for Mom at many critical times with up-to-date treatments and medicines. There is no way of repaying them. And in addition Mom has been lucky to have available Sonny and Alex, living downstairs, who provided wonderful mental and physical stimulation.

Mom was always there for me in my growing years, and as an ongoing influence of my life. I wish I could have helped her more in her declining years, but she has been in very capable and loving hands.