William Bill J. Spencer II

MEMORIAL SERVICE

June 15, 2013

Opening Words, Celebrant – Honorable Congressman Lucien N. Nedzi (retired)

For over forty years the Spencers and the Nedzis have been friends through the good fortune of having sons who developed a close friendship in childhood. Regrettably, despite the warm affection we have always held for the Spencers, life's patterns kept us from fully enjoying each others company. Nevertheless each encounter was a rewarding experience because Bill was such an interesting and decent person. As members of the same generation we had much to share and his impressive background and experiences were a source of admiration and respect. I am sure all join in sharing some of the grief experienced by Blanca and the family who have arranged today's deserved tribute to the memory of Bill Spencer and Ihereby extend in their behalf their most cordial welcome to all.

TRIBUTES

Memorial Speech: “My big Brother Bill” - James Spencer

I say big more to describe his character than his size. It's hard to talk about only one brother without talking about my other brothers and sisters. I was lucky to have two great sisters and three fine brothers all older than me. Each gave me guidance and advice. If I had listened better I would be a better person today. But this is the time to celebrate Bill's life and I would like to talk about Bill and our relationship.

Bill and I shared a bedroom when we were growing up and had too many experiences than we have time to share today but I would like to share a few.

Bill set the bar pretty high for Lou, Dick, and I to follow. As a young boy Bill got a paper route and delivered papers along Georgia Ave. from Montgomery Hills to Wheaton. He also worked at a Golf Driving Range for one of my Dad's friends. Each time he got a new bicycle he would sell his old one, first to Lou, second to Dick and then to me. While Bill was in high school he got a job in a gas station where eventually Lou and Dick worked. One summer Bill got a job delivering newspapers to paper boys to deliver to customers. Often he had worked two jobs during the day and had a date and would come home for an hour or two of sleep. When the alarm went off I would wake him up and we would drive to the White Tower in Silver Spring for a cup of coffee to wake up completely. We would take the papers to the carriers. Some of the area was in Tacoma Park and some of the paper boys were Adventist and could not deliver on Saturday. Bill and I delivered those routes in his '34 ford. At first Bill would drive and I would throw the papers. But I missed the porches too often, so Bill threw while I drove. Bill also at this time would pay me 25 cents to polish his shoes (good money at that time)

Bill, Lou, Dick and I had a lot of fun growing up. When we played sports it was always Bill and I against Lou and Dick. We played football on the side yard or baseball in Essex's pastures. We rode McKeever's horses. Bill rode a horse and Lou Dick and I rode ponies.

Sometimes we got into mischief. We would sneak into Essex barn and play in the hayloft, until old Fred, the caretaker, would hear us and chase us out. One time Bill, Lou and I were playing in the woods and set it and the field next to our property on fire. Another time when Mom and Dad were out Bill, Lou and I took out '38 Dodge out for a joy ride. The lights on the car went out. It was dark and we knocked down our neighbor's fence.

We had our chores to do, cutting grass, maintaining the driveway, and etc. Bill set an example for us to learn how to work. One time Dad had one of the fields plowed so we could plant a garden. We were not happy with this job, working with hoes, shovels, and an old hand plow. But before it was finished Bill had us all laughing. He was singing a song about beans. "Beans, beans the musical fruit the more you eat the more you.........."

As we got older we weren't able to spend as much time together. But Bill was still the big brother. When Bill was in high school he would drive Lou and I to school in his '35 Ford convertible, the three of us in the front seat. As we drove along Bill would holler horse bite, he and Lou would grab my thighs and pinch my leg. I started riding in the rumble seat.

Bill took me around to buy my first car and advised me what to buy. When I got out of the service, Bill got me a job with John McShain Inc. Contractors. At first I worked on the building site and later in the office with Bill as my boss. At that time I would bring my lunch and eat in the office. My wife, Nancy, always put a piece of chocolate cake in my lunch and would include a piece of cake for Bill. When he came into the office he would go to my lunch and get out the cake and weigh them on the postage scale and pretend to take the biggest piece. He would say 'If there is any thing I like better than chocolate cake it's more chocolate cake."

Bill liked people and once you were his friend you were his friend forever. He would run into someone he hadn't seen for a while he would pick up the friendship immediately. He got great pleasure from reunions and social gatherings. He loves our family picnics and found it hard to understand any reason why someone could not attend. I knew Bill was feeling bad when he stopped attending the Blair Alumni Luncheons.

I said Bill set the bar high for us to follow. Bill did this while he was dealing with this illness. He endured his hardship without complaint and his biggest worry was, although we tried to tell him otherwise, he thought he was a burden on the family.

Memorial Speech – Michael Emery Spencer

Memorial Speech – William “John” Spencer III

Memorial Speech, “Tribute to My Father” – Richard Edward Spencer

Three Fridays ago, on the day my father returned home after giving up on the failing measures to prolong his life, I hugged and kissed him from his favorite sofa spot. I was crying and apologizing to him for favoring the treatments I thought could keep him healthy. He embraced me, patting me on my back as was his custom, and simply said, “It'll be alright. Things are getting better.”

His simple words startled me, but he was right, as he virtually always was. Look around you; he has brought us all here together today, brought me closer to my brothers and their families and reunited us with each other in a break from how everyday life can keep us apart.

He loved you, his family, both close or extended, and so many people he welcomed in his heart as friends and loved ones with equal openness. He loved talking to people, and was a rare listener as a man who took a genuine interest in others, sharing his thoughts so mutually.

He was a “national treasure,” of the generation who lived and thrived through five major wars or armed conflicts for our country in our 20th and 21st centuries. To me, he represented all men of his era, by his religions of gentlemen's agreements, a fierce work ethic, the desire to help others, and his craft of manual skills, all things that seem fleeting in our modern age.

For a man of his generation, he could have been steeled by how men were raised to be men, and seeing so much profound change in the world could have hardened him. Yet he was a caring and affectionate father who would say “I love you” openly and sincerely. Despite growing up in an age of segregation and drastic social change, he unlearned any prejudices and loved people for who they were. When in my thirties I told him about my boyfriend at the time, he simply went on to say, “So when are you going to bring Steve to the family picnic?”

So his love was so easy to return, and there is so much I love about my father that will keep him adored in my broken heart. He showed me life's passions, and through him I learned about architecture and I share his admiration for the work of Frank Lloyd Wright. I see what he saw in the majesty and utility of horses of different breeds; the loyalty and companionship of dogs he so loved. I always relished in the quiet enjoyment of our sun-filled trips to his beloved “country,” where he showed me how to make labor your love, and the Zen of “putzing.”

Like his sister Ruth, he loved sweets, especially ice cream in its most simple form, and you would have to be numb not to find utter joy and peace in enjoying a cone or cup with him (usually a cup, two scoops, vanilla would usually do just fine.)

He observed and admired the grace of athletes and the talent of musicians without fanaticism, but instead with classy appreciation for the art of individual perseverance.

But I especially will miss his deep, folksy voice and his way of talking in his unique Maryland accent. You could hear it in how he said “Warshington,” or “brekfiss,” or he always used the word “bought” even when “brought” was what he really meant. He wasn't entirely un-hypocritical about profanity, but he mostly conveyed his age of innocence, with his “hells bells,” “holy mackerels” and “darn its.” He often called his wife, our mother “mommy” so openly and shamelessly, one of his nurses thought that might be Mrs. Spencer's first name. And for mommy, his Spanish was hopeless, but gives her no end of joy in how only he tried to speak it, talking about “Dulsee de Lechee” ice cream, or Mom's “Novelas,” or “Sabao Igantay”, the Univision “Big Saturday” variety show he hated to love.

Thank goodness he didn't shy from nicknames too, my favorite form of affection, and freely let me misnomer him as Pop, My Poppy and most recently Poppa Doc, remembering my time in Haiti, but also for all his medical appointments. He loved showing off his newest grandson, Nicholas who he called “Strictly Business,” on his iPhone, and had so many goofy funny sayings when we were kids it would take to long for this memorial to recite them all (one favorite way he would make fun of fools was, “Don't tell me how to spend my money,” said with ball cap cocked stupidly – his long hand for “what a jerk.”) Most memorably for me though, was how the nonsense of life and it's many frustrations had him damning so many things on God's behalf, it left God to look after more important things.

Dad was just all wholesome goodness to me. He was wonderfully paternal and anyone can tell you how Uncle, or Tio Bill touched their lives as a child or young adult. He was always there to impart his wisdom and share his skills and life's experiences so you could avoid the mistakes he already learned from. He was selfless that way, and he never minded letting me share him with my own friends and peers.

He was simply magic, the way he was so prescient about the weather, his fine-tuned instincts, his profound common sense, and the way he could fix anything or get you anywhere around here by car (his knowledge of roads and highways in this area preceded GPS by about 60 years.) Until now, I never understood how he relaxed by doing all manner of domestic work, from tedious bookkeeping, to cutting grass or putting up shelves. I know now those things are life, they are how we care for others and how we keep moving. “Stop talking about it and just do it,” he'd often exclaim, unless he himself could get the job done. He epitomized responsibility, and did everything so completely, so thoughtfully, and so respectfully, his mark is indelible. Just go to my parents’ home, our family farm or come to my house for just a sample of his industry, his life's practice almost up to the moment he flew to heaven. In his own way, he taught me how to live, and how to die, with bravery, dignity and responsibility. “Do the best you can, and that'll be rough enough,” my dad would always say.

That's how he knew how life goes, and he always kept his promises. I know you will take your gifts from your tio Bill, Billito, uncle Bill, Mr. Spencer, your grandpa, your dear brother, our great father and your beloved husband, to keep our family close and make this world a better place. It WILL be all right, and things ARE getting better, because my father was here, and now we will keep his promises.

Memorial Speech – Eric Francis Nedzi

Welcome, it is so good to see all the family and friends here today. Today we celebrate Bill Spencer’s life. I have the honor of knowing Bill for 40 years as a friend of the family. He was always Mr. Spencer to me. Bill liked to build things and as part of this what he really liked to do was build relationships. It was through these relationships that Bill was able to share his love of life and wisdom to many. In the McLean area there are a number of us who had the chance to share this. I will try and say a few words for all the McLean kids who knew the Spencer's and went on the many trips that Bill took us on and the backyard parties.

Bill always had things to do but that never stopped him from taking the time to enjoy life and show us new things. There was always a "Good Night, did you see that!" On one trip we were driving by a field of cows and Bill noticed one of the cows was giving birth. We stopped and watched the cow give birth and then saw all the other cows come up and greet the new calf. It's funny but that's what people do too when there is a new child. I was reminded of this on the way to the airport when my daughter asked "Where the cows are Daddy?" There were no cows but next time we see them I will tell her the story of when Daddy was with John and his Daddy Mr. Spencer, Daddy saw the Mommy cow give birth to the baby cow . She will probably listen intently and then respond with a cheerful OK.

There were many fun trips but there were also many lessons like the time Bill shared his love of horses with us by taking us to see the pony swim at Assateague Island. Then there were the many trips to the farm; I am sure Bill could have gotten more done alone but there always seemed to be a station wagon full of kids on the trip. He seemed to enjoy our company but I don't know how he put up with all the jokes and funny names we called him. We were always so eager to get there BUT we always had to stop at the building and "Cut the grass". This too was a valuable lesson "Finish your work before you play".

Bill also shared his love of building. I remember when he took us to the National Cathedral job site. How scared I was walking up near the roof but was rewarded by the beautiful view of DC. All the time I was remembering what Bill said before we went up, "Never lean or put your weight on anything, the building isn't finished and it won't support you" he emphasized this with a graphic story of a new college engineering grad who did not did not learn this wisdom in college. I still remember this and on the rare occasion I am on a construction site I don't lean on anything. Even if I am not on a construction site I test any railing before I lean over.

As the years passed and my visits were brief when I came to town or Bill happened to be in the car when I called John we caught up briefly. It was always good to hear what he was up to and how the farm was doing. Then I was blessed to have a daughter of my own and when we visited Bill and Blanca got to see Alexa play with Nick and ride the hobby horses he got the grandchildren. He really enjoyed seeing the next generation grow up. Bill's love of life, kindness and wisdom will always be with us and these future generations.

Closing Words, Celebrant – Honorable Congressman Lucien N. Nedzi (retired)

This concludes today's tribute to a man who will remain in our memories forever for all of his significant accomplishments and the warm hand of friendship he extended to all who knew him. Bill Spencer will be missed and we extend our deepest sympathies to Blanca and his entire family. You are now all invited to join the family in the reception which follows.

* * * * * * * * * *

William J. Spencer II, or just "Bill" as he was happy to be called, left us for the heavens in the early morning of Friday, June 7, 2013. Bill was a native Washingtonian and proud American. Born in our nation's capital in 1928, he grew up in Maryland and ultimately settled in Arlington and McLean, Virginia. Bill was of our "national treasures" generation, raised in Silver Spring, MD in a large family with three younger brothers and two older sisters in the wake of the great depression. He experienced World War II in his formative years and served with the Army Corps of Engineers after the Korean War. He married Blanca Castillo Spencer on August 30th, 1963, making a star-matched pair by their twin ages - his Birthday being 08/09/28, and hers, 09/08/28. A model father, he raised four children in eras of tremendous social and economic change, starting in the 1950s and well into the modernity of our new millennium.

An architectural engineer by training, Bill learned the profession of construction project management from 1947 to 1968 with the John McShain Builder's Company (a firm featured in the PBS documentary called "The Man Who Built Washington.") The buildings and projects Bill worked on include numerous DC landmarks, such as the White House renovation, the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception, John's Hopkins School of Advanced International Studies, the Kennedy Center and Department of State.

Moving on from John McShain Builders, Bill joined DC's other prominent construction firm, George A. Fuller Co. From 1968 to 1988, projects he managed included the National Cathedral and Twin Towers in Roslyn, the original Gannett headquarters for USA Today. Towards the end of his career, Bill worked overseas in the early 90s on the reconstruction of an Air Base in Kuwait destroyed by the Iraqi occupation during the Gulf War. Of his many life's accomplishments, he fondly recalled helping construct an orphanage in Korea during his military service after the war, as well as the delicate work of the installation of the stained glass rose window above the west entrance of the National Cathedral.

A devotee of real country music, hardy home cooking, the wide open road and the broad vistas of our USA he so loved, Bill was wholesome goodness who epitomized the American spirit. His legacy lives on in his adoring and tenacious wife, their three sons, four grandchildren and two beautiful (baby girl!) great grandchildren. We fill the hole in our hearts with his memory.

Donation's in Bill's memory are welcomed with the The Myelodysplastic Syndromes (MDS) Foundation at www.mds-foundation.org, or the Leukemia Research Foundation at www.leukemia-research.org.

Loving husband of Blanca Spencer

https://www.dignitymemorial.com/obituaries/12146248