Mrs Athena "Thenie" May (Crume) Sharum

      Mrs Athena May Sharum was a woman for whom actions would speak louder than words. Her life motto might well have been “if it isn’t logical, it’s not important.” The qualities of being fair, just and the ability to recognize what was right were clearly driving forces in Thenie’s life. She was also the kind of person who could respect a “do not disturb” sign, whether it was real or implied. She was analytical and observant, with an ability to be simultaneously spontaneous and keenly perceptive. Thenie was modest in her actions and extremely literal in her thoughts and in the manner in which she communicated with others. When Thenie said something, she meant it. All those who knew her appreciated this trademark quality.

       Her parents were Wilbur Rose Crume and Violet Pauline (Barhydt) Crume. Thenie was raised in Goshen Indiana. Even as a small child, Thenie wanted to understand what was right and what was wrong in any given situation. As Thenie grew older, she realized the importance of being treated fairly, and in return, she treated everyone around her the same way. This belief in fair play served Thenie well throughout her life and despite her natural shyness; she enjoyed a solid group of friends.

      Since Thenie sought to treat those around her with respect, she often found herself in the role of playing peacemaker within her family. She was comfortable in working through the types of sibling rivalry situations that quite often occur, because she loved the challenge of conflict resolution. She would look at the most reasonable and practical ways to settle any disputes. Thenie was raised with four full siblings, and eight half siblings. From the oldest half sibling, Rebecca Rose Crume 1917-1928, Irene Marie (Crume) Detwiler 1919-1995, Arthur W Crume 1921-1991, Hazel Annabelle (Crume) Purciarele 1922-2008, Alice (Crume) Davis 1925-1998, Dorathy Jeanette (Crume) Wambold, Bollinger 1926-2007, Mary Lou Crume 1927-1927, D Wilbur Crume 1929-1929, Full Siblings, Leonard Raymond Crume 1933-2010, William Richard Crume 1934-2013, Ralph Edward Crume 1937-2013, Jacqueline Dianne (Crume) Besson 1943-. Thenie was constantly involved in activities with her siblings. Thenie and her siblings had the typical rivalries while growing up, but they shared many life experiences.

      Those who didn’t know Thenie well might have thought her to be objective and somewhat emotionally detached, but family and friends who were close to her knew that she was capable of unexpected flashes of humor. Thenie’s good friends tended to be “thinkers” like herself. Even though the circle of friends was somewhat small, it was a strong and loyal group, and Thenie liked nothing better than to spend her free time with them. Thenie was well known for always being up front and open, never hiding her true feelings, qualities that drew deep loyalty from her friends because they understood and appreciated her for the person she was. Another quality that people admired in Thenie was her ability to link cause and effect and apply the appropriate connection in her assessment of any new situation. Later in life, she became friends with Nancy Hines, Nancy was a very dear friend and very close to her throughout the years of her assisting at Avondale Elementary School in Spring Valley. She was also frineds with Marlene Barfoot, Thenie would help do Marlene's hair color and curl. A friendship to her was something that was very dear and she chose her friends very carefully.

      This same loyalty and up front honesty Thenie shared with her friends carried over to other aspects of her life, including her relationships with her family. On September 26, 1952, Thenie exchanged wedding vows with Jeremiah Jacob Sharum Jr. at the City Hall of Elkhart, Indiana. The marriage became a solid relationship, due in part to Thenie’s skill at bringing fresh energy and clarity to meeting Jerry's needs. She was a great listener who enjoyed the couple’s “together” time, especially when it came to celebrating special occasions.

      As the family grew, Thenie was easily able to adapt to the changes and challenges of parenthood. Thenie was blessed with a total of six children,, Her first born was a son's named Craig Allen Sharum, second son Ralph Edward Sharum, first daughter Athena Rae Sharum, second daughter Jacqulin Elaine Sharum, third daughter Violet Christine Sharum, fourth daughter Rebecca Lynn Sharum. They were also blessed with fourteen grandchildren,, Ralph Edward Sharum, Jenniipher lea Sharum, Vencient Wade Sharum, Robert Ronald Potter, Randy Allen Potter, Ricky Lee Potter, Brandy May Sharum, Jacqueline Elaine Coffing, Violet Chrisine II Coleman, Jimmie Wayne Coleman Jr. David Walter Coleman, Chandra Rose Duncan, Gary Alan Duncan, Christopher Evan Duncan. At the time of her passing she had 28 great-grandchildren. Thenie was never impulsive in dealing with family problems. Instead, she would carefully think things through before implementing the solution in a logical and objective manner. Thenie was a strong, clear communicator who excelled at eliminating confusion by making matters crystal clear to all those involved. At the same time, Thenie’s inventive nature could turn some of the boring old household chores into a fun activity for the family.

      In her work life, Thenie was the kind of person who had no difficulty in taking on a project and seeing it through to its completion. She excelled at dealing with those pesky details that can derail some people, and once she understood exactly why she was working on a project, she could plow full steam ahead. For Thenie, being able to grasp the logical components of any task was significant to her in appreciating its importance. Even if she worked alone on an assignment, Thenie was able to incorporate and welcome new insights from co-workers, and she would readily use them if they improved the process. Although her primary occupation was homemaker, she was always assisting at schools and any event she could in the community. She spent many years assisting at Avondale Elementary with any available position that needed help. She loved to go on field trips and monitor the children, do Christmas bazaar, cake walks, art projects and classroom work. Thenie always made the effort to be a team player, doing what was necessary in order to get the job done.

      Thenie’s curious and inquisitive nature influenced her choice of leisure pursuits as well. She applied her strong concentration and analytical skills as to how things worked to her choice of activities. She particularly enjoyed the “alone” time her hobbies provided. Thenie's favorite hobbies included, her love of decorating cakes, doing every kind of crafts she laid her eyes on, and gardening, she loved her rose garden. She made cakes for every occasion, birthdays, weddings, graduation. She would recreate items that she would see in a store or while traveling. Any project that involved using her hands and creative talents, immediate had attention. She also picked up every craft possible to teach her children and grandchildren and greatgrandchildren, from origami to resin molds, papier mache to ceramics, plaster of paris molds, and painting etc. Everyone went to Athena M (Crume) Sharum and Jeremiah J Sharum Jr's house to have fun and run free as the backyard was rather huge also. Good times and many memories at that home. Thenie was content to enjoy her hobbies alone but was also willing to share her interests with others.

      Thenie was an asset to any organization she joined. In many ways, she was a woman of action who would rather tackle a job than spend time chatting about irrelevant things. She worked well on small committees and excelled at focusing on the important details without getting bogged down by the unnecessary parts of an assignment. Throughout her later years, Thenie was an active member of the PTA Avondale Elementary in Spring Valey Ca 91977.

      If Thenie believed in a cause or an idea, she was willing to work hard on its behalf. Thenie was a member of several community groups, including serving on committees mostly through Avondale Elementary School. Very active in PTA mostly at her childrens schools to have a hands on approach to her childs learning, and monitor the ascociations she also continued to assist witht the grandchildren at the same school. Politically, Thenie was fairly nuteral, however, she did see red from time to time.

      Religion and faith were important to Thenie. She held dear the faith and values she derived from her beliefs. Although Thenie was never an active member of a church that I am aware of during her adulthood, her father was a baptist preacher, and she mostly identified with pentecostal religion she always encouraged her children to make their own decision regarding beliefs.

      Because she was a woman who let her actions speak for themselves, Thenie didn’t find it necessary to brag or boast. But it wasn’t always possible for her to conceal her accomplishments. Others who recognized her achievements made certain that she was honored for them. Parent Assistant awards and a plaque with acknowledgment of support while helping in the classroom, arts and monitoring, were given to Thenie.

      Thenie appreciated the occasions when she was able to travel and get away on a vacation. She enjoyed learning about different locales and was open to exploring new and different places. Favorite vacation spots included Favorite vacations included going back home to Indiana to visit her family which she loved dearly and missed very much. She spent many years traveling all throughout the United States. She thoroughly enjoyed the task of gathering and analyzing travel information as she prepared for an upcoming trip.

      Thenie passed away on April 24, 2022 at Bella Vista Skilled Nursing Home in Lemon Grove, California. For many years Thenie fought a strong fight against emphysema. She was not one to go to the the doctor and continued to deal with the illness in silence for many years. Once she was diagnosed with this problem she began doing everything possible to live with it. She very strongly monitored her own medicine intake and questioned every turn of every doctor along the way. This quite possibly extended her life. She always walked long distances throughout her life and did so until she turned about 84. Unfortunately she contracted covid-19 after she had already had two boosters. It weakened her and although the actual virus passed she had other issues arise that continued to break her down. She was terribly thin due to some of these things. She fought a very hard fight and always had her wits about her up to the day of her last breath. Services were held at Little Chapel of Roses Glen Abby Memorial Park and Mortuary in Bonita California. Thenie was laid to rest in Glen Abby Memorial Park Bonita California 91902.

      Thenie strongly believed that talk is cheap. She was the type of person who would show others her feelings through her actions. She was practical and realistic but was able to be flexible when the need arose. She had a curiosity about the things around her and tried to experience life directly rather than sit back and talk about it. The experiences she treasured most were those she shared with her loved ones. Mrs Athena May Sharum will be greatly missed.

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Athena Mae Sharum, age 86, of El Cajon, California passed away on Sunday, April 24, 2022. Athena was born August 14, 1935.

Fond memories and expressions of sympathy may be shared at www.glenabbeysandiego.net for the Sharum family.