Our Dad's Eulogy

Tonight, we are here to celebrate the life of an extraordinary man. this is a little long but when you consider that my Dad's life began a little over 72 years ago, it is short by comparison.

He was born in 1940, by all accounts, he was a tiny baby, the first boy in his family and the apple of my Nanny's eye.

From an early age, he was a jokester. Always up to mischief of one kind or another. Most of us have heard his tales of growing up in Red Hook time and time again, "this is where I climbed into my neighbors' window and ate their wedding cake." "This was where Howard Zuzio and me would have rock fights." "This was where my sister Ellen would find me when I didn't want to go to school." "This was where I kissed my first girl." He somehow made his childhood seem idyllic.

For him, the jar of hot peanut butter that his Mom brought home at night from her factory job,  was a little slice of heaven.  He loved and appreciated the simple things in life, especially when you ate it.

As a teenager, he joined the Navy, at time when flat footed sailors need not apply. He figured out a way, he was wily like that, always ready for a challenge. While in the Navy, he spent a lot of time in Hawaii loving every minute of that exotic paradise and charming lots of girls.

Once he was discharged, he came back to Brooklyn and began to look for a career. His childhood friend, Patty Walsh, got him the application to be a Correction Officer. And, while he was waiting to be called for the job, his life was altered completely.

You see, he met my mother on the 5th Avenue bus. He asked her for the time and struck up a conversation with her. When they somehow ended up getting off at the same stop, my mother got nervous and ran home. Little did she know, they were both 12th street dwellers, her below 5th avenue and he above....

A few months passed without them seeing each other when lo and behold she slammed him in the head with the door at the donut shop. Well, it had to be love.

They were married on April 22, 1967. They had 5 children in roughly 7 years. Most people thought they were crazy. And, they were probably right, but my parents could not keep their hands off each other and that is the truth!

 My Dad worked 16 hours a day everyday for a year to buy our house. He was a provider like no other. His job was awful and ugly, but we never saw that side of it.

My Dad loved his children, each and everyone of us. He recognized the goodness in us. But, he was also our harshest critic. He wanted us to be good people.  But, he loved us even when we were not.

The 5 of us were not his only children. He adopted most of the kids who lived on our block and all of our friends. When we were little, he smelled of juicy fruit, old spice and cigarettes. He jingled when he walked because of all the keys and change in his pockets and he walked with his toes pointed out. We all, and when I say all, I mean dozens of kids, knew it was him turning the corner at the end of the day and we all ran to him for our stick of gum.

He may have been the best Uncle in the world and that is no lie. He loved his sisters' kids, as if they were his own and they loved him. And all of them would have done anything for him. But, one of them did. My cousin Robert rebuilt my Dad's House so that he would be comfortable and have a good quality of life and we can never repay him for what he did. Thank you, Robert.

My Dad loved mechanical things. And, while in Locksmithing school he met a like minded individual in the form of Mike Browne. Mike became my father's friend, partner, confidant and brother. Thank you, Mike for enriching our father's life.

The biggest and greatest event in our father's life was when he became a "Papa." That was when John was born, serendipitously on April 22! John's birth woke him up, made him quit smoking and changed his life for the better. He was so proud of John for all of his accomplishments.

With the birth of each grandchild, our Dad's heart grew. Next was Matthew funny and witty. Daniel smart, kind and caring. Ollie a peanut, yet full of life and mischief. Beautiful, intelligent Emma Patricia with the contagious laugh and Zoey his pretty, little dancing, sprite.

Unfortunately, our Dad lost the love of his life suddenly and too early. He was cheated and he knew it. It was a hard road for him but with the help of his children and their spouses, grandchildren, relatives, friends, neighbors, and his dog Dudley, he found a new life. And, every Sunday morning, he still turned on the radio and danced with my Mom.

Our Dad died suddenly and it is hard to imagine life without him. But, we will always love and remember the twinkle in his eyes, the mischief in his mind and the love that he showed each and every one of us.

Thank you for listening.

In  memory of a wonderful person. We will love you and miss you always. Uncle Butch was one of the funniest people I have known. He will be missed greatly.

Our thoughts are with the family and friends during this time.

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Joseph G. Duffy

Francis Hamilton

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Francis Hamilton

Joseph G. Duffy

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