OBITUARY

Pui Har "Agnes" Yeung

July 11, 1946March 16, 2021
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Agnes Pui Har Yeung passed away peacefully on March 16, 2021 in Vancouver with her siblings attending at her bedside. She had been frail for a long time. Although she beat COVID-19, she couldn't beat old age.

Agnes was born in a rural town in the Kwangtung Province of China on the 11th day of the sixth month in the Lunar Calendar in 1946. She was preceded by her Parents Hok Hang Yeung and King Ho Lam. She is survived by her sisters: Sau Har Wong of New York City, Barbara Suen (Keith Suen) of Vancouver, Siu Ha Wai of Hong Kong, Debbie Yeung (Tim Grad) of Edmonton, Edith Wong (Kanman Wong) of Vancouver, and her brother Steven Yeung of Vancouver. She will be sadly missed by her nephews and nieces: David and Phil Wong of New York, Po Chu Wai of Hong Kong, Vincent Suen of Vancouver, Oscar Wai of Hong Kong, Theo and Freddie Wong of Vancouver, Tiffany and Brianna Grad of Edmonton.

Agnes grew up in rural China and moved to Hong Kong to join her parents and sisters when she was 12 years old. She completed training to become a nurse, and spent two years in England specializing in midwifery before immigrating to Canada in 1974. She became a Registered Nurse and worked at hospitals in Edmonton and Vancouver before retiring in 1986.

We would like to thank all the caring teams who provided dedicated support to Agnes and her family in her final years: the private team who worked at the Yeung's residence, Britannia Lodge, Three Links Care Centre and Little Mountain Place; in particular, the following personnel at Little Mountain Place: Dr. Judith Hammond (her family physician), Maricel Morella (Director of Care), and Maria Ilad (Nurse who provided the final care).

During this difficult time of COVID-19, we decline any flowers or donations.

Since the in person attendance capacity is limited to 10, family and friends of Agnes can watch the streaming of the funeral live or at your convenience later using the link provided below:

Funeral Service Saturday, April 10th, 2021 at 10:00 am. https://funeraweb.tv/en/diffusions/26393

Services

  • Funeral Service Livestream

    Saturday, April 10, 2021

    VIEW VIDEO

Memories

Pui Har "Agnes" Yeung

have a memory or condolence to add?

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Ines Lee

May 27, 2021

Dear Barbara,

I have just finished watching Agnes's funeral ceremony. I am sure Agnes would be very proud of you all ( sisters and brothers including the brothers-in-law) for giving her such an honourable memorial service.

I am so touched by listening to the presentations. I am sure Agnes is now rested in a peaceful place with no suffering. Barb. you are a very good sister and the core of your family.

Take good care of yourself.

Ines

Bob Klassen

May 27, 2021

Hi Barb,

We were busy on April 10, but I watched your sister’s funeral later and thought I would share some thoughts with you.

Under the veil of the pandemic restrictions you and your family did a great job of honouring your sister. Some of the family stories shared struck a chord with me, like your son telling of how he and his aunt’s McDonald’s connection got started.

Your dedication to your sister was evident, though clearly it wasn’t always easy.

I wasn’t surprised that you see that you were a key part in your sister’s care, physical and emotional. This part of your personality came through in your leadership style in the lab.

I wish you and Keith health and happiness in the future.

All the best!

Bob

Alice Luk

May 26, 2021

Hi Keith,

That was a beautiful memorial service. Barbara's speech was very moving. I am deeply touched by her devotion as a sister!

你們一家為Agnes所付出的, 定能使她得到安慰和安息!

Alice

Margie Sillers

May 26, 2021

Hi Barbara,

Agnes’ Celebration of Life was full of Love, Honour and Respect! Such a beautiful story shared by family! Also what a wonderful close family! Thank you for sharing.

🤗❤️
Margie

Dora Mark

May 26, 2021

Dear Barbara,

Thank you for sharing the ceremony and celebration of life for your sister Agnes. It was very inspiring, touching and full of love and support from the family.

Thinking of you and your family. Take care.

From the Mark family.

Jennie Tan

May 26, 2021

Hi Barbara,

I did watch Agnes funeral service live at 10AM today, April 10, 2021.

I know your mom & Agnes in 1987, we were on the same holiday trip to US. I kept in touch because Agnes was a very good person to have as a friend.

I did visit Agnes when she was at Britannia Lodge, the last time I saw her was at Little Mountain Place in Sept 2019. I was away Oct to Jan 2020, then came COVID.

I have booked 2 Rest In Peace Catholic Mass for Agnes, August 7 & September 5, 2021.

Take care,

Jennie

Kin Cheng

May 26, 2021

Hi Barbara,

It must have been a difficult day for you as you say your final goodbye to Agnes.

Just want to let you know that we are thinking of you at this difficult time.

Kin and Jean

Nuey Soochan

May 26, 2021

Hi Barbara

That was a moving graceful service. You did your sister proud. It was very lovely.

Blessings to you and all your family. Take good care.

Sincerely,
Nuey.

Barbara Suen

April 24, 2021

潔霞的悼念

"蓮子心中苦,梨兒腹內酸"

佩霞走了這一段日子,是我一生裏最哀傷的。. 在眾多姊妹中,我與佩霞年紀最接近, 我也是留在她身邊到最後一刻的人。離開小山苑那一晚,我還很冷靜地駕車回家,發了短訉給家人,處理了急需的事項,倦極而睡。翌晨醒來,回想佩霞坎坷的大半生,我哭得肝腸寸斷。接着一個星期,只要一想起她,我就淚如泉湧。這幾年來她過得很苦,整天困在輪椅上,連吞嚥也有困難。雖然我和宇光每星期都陪伴她參加所有的慈濟活動如素午餐及歌唱節目等,但她始终希望可以回家與宇光住在一起。我每次去探望她,她只重覆問两個問題:你下次幾時再來? 我幾時可以回家?我儘量餵她吃一些她喜愛的食物,從來不敢在她面前流淚,現在我终於可以釋放我壓抑多年的淚水了。

回顧過去七十載,我在佩霞的生命中有很多不同的身份:

護衛

根據媽媽說:我幼年在中国農村時,已肩負了保護佩霞的責任。有一天,佩霞又被鄰居的孩子欺負。我聽到她的哭叫,面對一羣比我倆高大的強敵,我找了一枝長丫义,没頭沒腦的打,他們紛纷走避,一個走得較慢的,被Y义打中,傷了額頭。他的父母找上門來,我們的祖母答應会嚴懲我。徬晚時,祖母在媽媽的蚊帳後找到了我,她静静的抱起我,餵我吃晚餐。自從得到祖母的默許後,我成為佩霞的護衛,漸漸那羣惡霸就轉移了目標,不再欺負我們了。

家務及育兒的拍檔

幾年後佩霞來香港與我們團聚,媽媽又添了幾個弟妹。我和佩霞都要幫忙做家務及照顧弟妹。那時我上下午小學,媽媽出門買菜前,就將慕霞缚在我背上,我做功課也得背着她。待媽媽買菜回來,我就幫她做午钣。佩霞下午放學後,就負責用手洗全家的衣服,包括許多嬰兒尿布。

粵劇對手

那段日子我們除了上學,就待在家裹,沒有機会學習任何運動或社交技巧,看電影或粵劇是我們唯一的娛樂。有空時,佩霞和我就会披上床單當戲服,對唱我們喜愛的戲曲。

英文補習老師

佩霞在中國上小學時從未學過英文,所以她一直追得很辛苦。在1976年, 她重考中學会考時, 我每晚都陪她回崇真書院温習,成為她的英文補習老師,我和她苦練英文口試。放榜那天得悉她順利過關,舉家歡欣慶祝。

調解員

自從佩霞提早退体後,她與宇光及媽媽相處的時間很多。媽媽是個完美主義者,非常注重儀容,而佩霞則剛剛相反,不喜歡打扮。每次出外用膳前,兩人都為了衣着問題爭埶。為了解决這個茅盾,我悄悄的將佩霞那件心爱的殘舊羽絨和那双破靴子扔掉。她從此只好穿我們為她提供的新衣及靴子了。

康樂組長

在過去四十年來,我一直担當楊家的康樂组長。我們每個週末及每一位家人生日都会出外用膳。每逢中國的時節,媽媽都会準備丰盛的菜式款待我們,我就負責所有西方的節日,夏天的燒烤及冬天的火鍋等,這個習俗一直維持了三十年,直至媽媽不可以走路,在不方便出外用膳的情況下,我成為楊家的主廚。
在二零一二年末,為了實現媽媽最後一個旅遊心願,我帶領媽媽,佩霞及宇光乘坐遊輪作為期七天的夏威夷環島遊。那時媽媽和佩霞都巳經不良於行,宇光負責替媽媽推輪椅,我就替佩霞提她的拐扙椅。當我們去到海灘畤,我拖着佩霞和媽媽,站在水中拍照留念。雖然佩霞行動不便,我邀請她和我一起参加舞蹈班,她亳不猶疑就答應了,這是佩霞最後的一次跳舞了。

我的使命 (雞胸肉的故事)

往後的曰子漸走下坡,媽媽完全不能自理,又不願意入安老院。我們唯有僱用一個護理團隊在家照顧她。佩霞又常常進出醫院。我要兼顧媽媽的私家團隊及佩霞的位院處理,心力交瘁之餘, 難免有 “為何是我” 的念頭。直到有一天,我突然記起媽媽告訴我 “雞胸肉的故事”: 我們很小的時期,只有在大節曰才有雞吃。因為每個小孩都喜歡雞腿,媽媽在分配時,總是將翼膇分给最大方的佩霞。為了補償她,又附加一塊雞胸肉。我終於明白了:在佩霞坎坷的際遇中, 我,就是上天補给她的那塊“雞胸肉” 。我生下來的使命就是在她有需要的時候去扶持她。

誤会冰釋

雖然我總是在她有需要的時候扶持她,我卻不敢肯定佩霞是否喜歡我。我常常反省我有否因取代她大姐的地位而令她不快,或經常囉唆她的飲食習慣而令她厭煩。 而令我最感遺憾的,是我未能保留那個曾照顧媽媽最後日子的團隊,提供同等的照顧,讓佩霞可以留在家中與弟弟相依為命,我知道這是她最大及最後的願望,我卻不能成全。

在新冠疫情第二波爆發的前夕,我和宇光如常帶佩霞到小山苑附近的小公園午餐, 時近深秋,天氣開始冷了,我們儘量留在太陽下取暖。午餐後,佩霞忽然認真的和我說:"我很感謝你為我做的一切,我以前曾經對你有誤会,很對不起"。我忍着淚回答:"我也常常開罪你,對不起。我們是姊妹啊! 姊妹之間是不記仇的"。那一刻,我有不祥的感覺,知道她將不久於世。

佩霞的使命及跛子與瞎子的比喻

在一般人眼中,他們只看見我對佩霞的扶持,而事實是:佩霞在世的使命,比我的更高更廣。我只為楊家效力,而她的恩澤卻造福到世界另一角落的第三國家,培養當地赤貧的兒童。她有太多的高尚情操值得我們學習:尤記三年前,我受醫院所圫,要在救治佩霞的级別上堤供指引,家人都為這難題下不了决定,於是我直倿訪問她。她的答案令所有人詫異及震撼:" 一定要救, 因我熱愛生命"。她那時已不良於行及吞嚥有困難,在她最後的幾年,無論她的健康有多壞,過得有多苦,她從不抱怨。每當我感到困倦或沮喪時,只要我想起佩霞,我就会跟自己説:"比起她,我這一點小苦頭,真是微不足道"。 我又重新振作起來。

二家姐:你给予我能量,在你身上,我學懂了愛, 家, 誠信及同情心的重要,由你熱愛生命的榜樣,令我們領悟到要珍惜一切,因為世上沒有任何東西是理所當然的。你和我,就像跛子和瞎子,我背着你走,而你就是我的人生導航。你的使命,我終於懂了。

二家姐, 你是我們最偉大的家姐,永遠活在我們的心裏。

Barbara Suen

April 19, 2021

Acknowledgement

I would like to thank Keith and Vincent who shared me and our resources to support my life long mission.

A lot of thanks for all those who sent flowers / condolences / memories messages; helped with the funeral preparation / presentation, attended the funeral (in person / virtual); attended the visitation and forwarded care packages to Agnes in the storm. A special thank you also goes to Vincent who spent a lot of time on the celebration of Agnes' life video and the technical support for this memorial book.

For the rest of the family, we should all pat our back for our support for Agnes through different ways and different times. Now Agnes doesn’t suffer any more and rests in peace. We will soldier on and carry out her passion for life and her love for others.

謝詞

非常感謝炳基及孫永的支持,令我可以完成我的使命:全力資助及照顧楊家有需要的親人。

謝謝所有在喪禮前夕到靈前致祭的親友, 冒着風雨燒衣進宝; 幫忙籌備及參與佩霞的喪禮;又送來很多漂亮的花; 親切的慰問和美好的回憶。特別要多謝孫永,他花了很多時間,製作影片及配樂,在喪禮上播放,及提供電腦技術支援,使我們可以順利完成佩霞的紀念册。

還有楊家的親人,我們都在佩霞在世期間,在不同的時段,同不同的方式,支持及愛護她,應該感到自豪。現在佩霞不再受苦,可以安息了。我們將繼續她對生命及他人的熱愛,努力活下去。

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