Marilyn Patricia Norris

On April 5, 1935, Marilyn was born into the loving arms of her parents Herman and Gladys (Wakefield) Schefter, who sadly lost their eldest daughter, Verda, in infancy just two years earlier. Marilyn was raised in Guelph, Ontario, along with four other siblings: two older brothers, Austin and Charles, as well as a younger sister Mary and a younger brother William. The family home was at 39 Toronto Street in what is known as “The Ward” district (St. Patrick’s Ward), largely populated by working-class and immigrant families. A block over on Oliver Street was her mother’s childhood home, and her father worked just minutes away on Ontario Street at Newlands-Harding Yarns Ltd. With safe streets, friendly, close-knit neighbours, and plenty of green space, this was an ideal area to raise children.

Herman and Gladys’s best friends, Walter and Eileen Krusky, lived right across the street, so it was no surprise that Marilyn became best friends with their daughter Joy. The two spent countless hours playing outdoors, and one of their most treasured spots was the kid-sized doll house in the Schefter backyard. Their friend, Jeanette Finora—who they playfully nicknamed “Squirt”—lived a ways away atop the “100 Steps” that connect The Ward to St. George’s Park. She could not, unfortunately, spend as much time with them on Toronto Street as she would have liked. Despite the distance, she too became lifelong friends with Marilyn and Joy, and the three were inseparable while often hanging out uptown, enjoying activities such as roller-skating on Friday nights, and swimming. Other neighbourhood friends included Jill Blackwell, Bill Humphries, Josephine Zaman, Don Campbell, Bernice Rosewell, Dolly Chelli, and Pinky Innocente.

She was raised in the Roman Catholic faith, and after Holy Mass each Sunday at Sacred Heart Church on Alice Street, her family often took a scenic walk, or drive, to areas around town. Popular spots included the greenhouses at The College (now the University of Guelph), the Cenotaph downtown, the canon at St. George’s Park, the gardens at the Ontario Reformatory, and the McCrae House Memorial. Her fondest memories of this period were when they visited her Schefter cousins in Welland, Ontario, which they did several times a year. They documented these and other family gatherings extensively with their Kodak “Brownie” camera, and the resulting photographs have become priceless family treasures to this day.

Marilyn studied the Commercial program at Loretta Academy, which was a small, red-brick building connected to the chapel at the Church of Our Lady in Guelph. This eight-room structure housed a science room, a library, and the commercial department. As was customary at the time, she completed Grade 11 and then joined the workforce. Her first job was as a legal secretary at Hungerford & Guthrie, and she remained in that profession for her entire career. During this period, she was also a member of the Catholic Youth Organization along with Joy, Jeanette, and other childhood friends. While at a CYO dance, she met and fell in love with Raymond Middleton of Galt (now Cambridge), Ontario, who often travelled to Guelph with friends to attend this and other events in town.

On May 30, 1951, shortly after Marilyn turned 16, she and Ray were married. The ceremony took place at Sacred Heart Church, witnessed by close friends and family including Ray’s mother, Mary (Kujanik) Middleton, as well as his extended family from Galt. It was there that the couple relocated and soon started a family. Marilyn and Ray were blessed with five children: two daughters, Patricia and Janet, as well as three sons, Richard, David, and Bradley. Money was tight in those days, but the couple found inexpensive ways to have fun with other friends that included Barb & Herb Eitel, Bill & Nikki Wattman, Reg & Joan Weaver, Dot & Fred Bartlett, Doreen & Gaetan Godbout, Laura & Dick Tone, Betty & Mel Mowbray, and Pat & Ike Gerard. Sometimes these get-togethers were held at Halloween or on New Year’s Eve, but often they were simply just a Saturday night at home—albeit with party games, cocktails, party favours, and even more photos to capture these precious moments in time. Still, Marilyn kept close ties with her family and friends in Guelph. She and Ray often travelled there so that their children would grow up knowing their aunts, uncles, and grandparents—because family was of upmost importance to them. Sunday suppers were almost a weekly gathering for the extended family. In the 1960s, Marilyn and Ray joined the Jaycettes and Jaycees, respectively, which were community/social organizations with branches across the globe. This was when they met Ed & Diane Bradley, Ray & Loraine Norris, and Bill & Bernice Adams. These four couples became best of friends and were nicknamed “The Great Eight,” and their children were like family to each of them.

It was this extended network of friends and family that helped Marilyn through what would become the most difficult years of her life. After Ray succumbed to leukemia in 1972, Marilyn was faced with the challenge of raising five children on her own. Their son David, just five years later, died in a tragic car accident at age 18 that also claimed the life of one of his friends. Some may have given into the tragedy that had seemingly become their life, but not Marilyn! She was strong, courageous, and had faith in God, with unwavering support and love from her amazing family and dear friends. Some of them formed a special social club for her, a once-a-month gathering that gave her a much-deserved night out (leaving eldest daughter Patti in charge of her younger siblings). Many women were part of this “Club” over the years, including Bernice Adams, Dot Bartlett, Diane Bradley, Dodie Bround, Sandra Burkholder, Connie Cosman, Maggie Goldstein, Loraine Norris, Judy Powell, Bonnie Swain, Velma Thomas, and Marion Wright.

And Marilyn, with her amazing sense of humour, definitely had a knack for entertaining her friends in kind. Notably, one Halloween, she hosted a “celebrity” party at her home on Tait Street. Her friends were given a master list of attendees, and each were assigned a specific celebrity to dress up as. However, that did not mean that a husband and wife would be given, for example, Sonny and Cher. These celebrities were actually assigned to different friends, who then had to arrange ahead of time to arrive together at the house. Marilyn’s son Rick acted as the doorman, opening their car doors then escorting them underneath a large awning that traversed the length of the driveway—while their arrival was announced over loudspeaker by emcee John Cosman as if they were the actual celebrities. There was even an illuminated sign on the front lawn that read “Welcome Celebrities Here Tonight At 8:00 P.M.” Thankfully, Marilyn had very understanding neighbours!

She worked tirelessly to provide for her family, and her children were never wanting of anything. She continued acting as an Executive Secretary for several legal firms including Goad and Goad, Ben Unger, and Tait McDonald. She was a true leader and respected by colleagues and clients alike. Often, the Galt legal community gathered on a Friday evening after work to socialize over a beverage or two at the Albion Hotel before heading their separate ways for the weekend. Marilyn met Jean (Simpson) Fenerty through her work, and they formed a life-long friendship. Jean spent a lot of time with Marilyn, often helping with decorating tasks such as hanging wallpaper. But most often they sat around the kitchen table at 18 Tait talking about life and sharing a lot of laughs together. Jean was part of the Middleton family and always refers to Marilyn as her BFF.

Gifted with a talent for crafting and costume making, Marilyn spent many evenings at the sewing machine with her youngest son by her side. Usually, Bradley was having his own imaginary adventures with Legos, Star Wars, or Planet of the Apes toys—or anything else gathered from the family’s cherished “toy room”—but sometimes he also “helped” with the sewing. Marilyn was well-known for her professional-looking Halloween costumes, often making matching ones for both her and Bradley to wear out trick-or-treating (which she continued doing for her grandchildren, as well). These outfits were stored in “Halloween trunks” and worn by friends and family for years. She also made numerous doll clothes that were donated to Church bazaars. Sometimes, on Saturdays, she enlisted the help of Janet and Bradley to sell the doll clothes and other homemade crafts at Leo the Lion’s Factory Outlet in Galt. This was a surplus store that became part flea market on weekends.

In the 1970s, Marilyn and her siblings began sharing a cottage at Belwood Lake, Ontario. From water skiing to snowmobiling, and cards to crokinole, countless weekends and summers were spent enjoying cottage life—even in the early days when there was no running water and just one outhouse for everyone! Thanks to those years at Belwood Lake, their children—having essentially grown up together—are more like siblings than cousins, with aunts and uncles as close as parents. Longtime friends like Ed & Diane Bradley and Ray & Loraine Norris also owned cottages on the lake, and Marilyn’s circle of friends later expanded to include Bob & Sheila Logan, Ron & Sylvia West, and Robin & Vicki Williams. Belwood Lake became the destination for annual Jaycees festivities, birthday celebrations, and extended family gatherings. But it was not all fun and games; renovations were necessary over the years, and the kids did not always enjoy these “family fun” projects. Yet they helped, nonetheless.

Her first husband Ray had been an active member of the community, spending many years coaching sports including baseball, and on several occasions, he coached their son Rick. After Ray passed away, Galt Minor Baseball created a memorial trophy in his honour that was presented at their annual banquet. Marilyn initially presented The Raymond Middleton Memorial Trophy to the recipients but also felt it was important to include her children in honouring their father in this way. So, with mom by their side, some of them took turns presenting over the years. After 25 years of celebrating Ray Middleton at the banquet, Marilyn decided to retire the trophy, which was returned to the family and has been under the care of Rick for many years.

Marilyn lived her life guided by a well-defined set of beliefs and was a parishioner of St. Gregory’s Church in Galt. In 1984, she married long-time friend Ray Norris, who was welcomed into the family along with his son Bryan. Relocating to Preston, she became a parishioner of St. Clement’s Church, where her brother, Father Charles Schefter, ministered. She and Ray continued enjoying cottage life together, where there was always music playing on the stereo and a puzzle on the go in the basement, with friends and family laughing around the dinner table. Bryan spent nearly every weekend at the family cottage, and he would often help his dad with the various “cottage projects” that were on the go. After a hard days’ work, they were rewarded with a delicious meal prepared by Marilyn.

She became a grandmother in 1988 with the arrival of Patti and Bill’s twin sons Shane and Kyle, and a little over two years later, their son Blair was born. Grandchild number four arrived in 1997 with the birth of Jan’s son, Carter. When Patti’s sons were small, Marilyn and Jan often drove to her home in London after work to see the boys. They had baby fever and needed a cure! After spending the night, in the morning they would make the hour-long journey back to Cambridge and then back to work (and then return to London afterwards!). Marilyn and Ray were always there for their grandsons’ birthdays and other special occasions such as First Communions, Confirmations, and graduations. Marilyn never missed a Christmas morning at Jan’s house and would arrive early so she could watch Carter open his gifts. Then she would scoot home to finish preparing a delicious Christmas dinner with all the trimmings for her children, their spouses, and grandchildren. She rarely took any “Marilyn” time; for her, it was always children and family first.

After Marilyn retired in October 1998, she and Ray continued entertaining friends at their home on Hopewell Road with their renowned dinner parties, which often included his famous Caesar salad and her exquisite homemade desserts (with Jan often acting as server and bartender!). They also hosted BBQs in their picturesque backyard, where Marilyn enjoyed spending summer mornings attending to the various flower gardens spread throughout. With an ever-expanding social circle, they explored their shared love of traditional jazz music, joining the KW Dixieland Club and attending numerous festivals across North America with friends Bob & Suzie Lane, Jerry & Diana Tuttleman, Bob & Joey Stride, and Val & Tony Desmond. Favourite vacation destinations included Savannah, Georgia, and New Orleans, Louisiana. They travelled as often as possible, and retirement afforded Marilyn the opportunity to spend even more time with her grandchildren. She also enjoyed quiet times, which included knitting, reading, and crafting seasonal displays for her home.

She also loved animals. The family dog, Casey, was a much-cherished companion for twelve years to her and her children during the darkest of times after her first husband passed away. Her second husband also loved dogs, and pets were always welcome at Hopewell Road. Jackson, the dog next door, was a frequent visitor, and would walk over on his own to announce with a bark that he was ready for his daily treat! Benji, who lived across the street, was one of many pets that stayed over at Marilyn and Ray’s while their owners were away. Roxy, Jan’s dog, became as much their pet as she was hers and her son’s. Marilyn would take Roxy for a walk almost daily, and often Jan arrived home after work to find a note explaining that her dog was visiting them for the afternoon. And then there was Barney, a little stuffed pooch and faithful companion to both Ray and Marilyn that stood patiently by the side door to await all their canine visitors. He had been with them since the mid-1980s and has now joined Jan in Nova Scotia.

Marilyn and Ray celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary in December 2014, but shortly thereafter he passed away. She had been diagnosed with dementia in the mid-2000s, but even as the disease progressed, she was still able to enjoy activities with her children. These included roaming through antique and thrift stores, visiting her family and friends, taking many walks, and listening to live jazz on Saturday afternoons. She, along with Patti and Jan, went on vacation to Florida in 2016. In 2018, Jan moved to Nova Scotia, and one of Marilyn’s most memorable trips was when she and Patti visited her at her new home that summer (Roxy, too, was very happy to see Marilyn!). For a few years each summer, Marilyn and Patti would visit Brad for a “Blue Jays weekend” in Toronto, where they attended a baseball game and visited other sights in the city. Following her move to back to Galt, Rick visited her a couple of times a week and they would go for long walks around the neighbourhood—an activity they both loved. Marilyn was also an avid fan of watching figure skating, cooking shows, and curling on television. Most of all, she cherished the time she spent with family and friends.

With her children Patti, Jan, and Brad by her side, Marilyn passed away peacefully on February 14, 2022, at Hilltop Manor in Cambridge. On May 7th, she was laid to rest at Mount View Cemetery alongside her first husband, Ray, and son, David. Marilyn’s children and grandchildren miss her tremendously. The love they have for her is endless and will carry them through the saddest of times, just as she taught them it would.

Rest in peace, mom. The love that surrounded you on earth is equally as abundant in heaven.

Love,

Patti, Rick, Janet, Brad, and Bryan

Marilyn's funeral mass was held at St. Gregory’s Church in Cambridge, Ontario, on February 18, 2022. Father Malcolm Katzenberger presided over the service, and passages were read by family and friends.

The first reading was by Jennifer Johnson, niece of Marilyn.

A Reading from the Book of the Prophet Isaiah (25: 6a, 7-9)

On this mountain

the Lord of hosts will make for all peoples

a feast of rich food.

And he will destroy on this mountain

the shroud that is cast over all peoples,

the sheet that is spread over all nations.

he will swallow up death forever.

Then the Lord God will wipe away the tears from all faces,

and the disgrace of his people he will take away from all the earth,

for the Lord has spoken.

It will be said on that day,

Behold, this is our God; we have waited for him, so that he might save us.

This is the Lord for whom we have waited.

let us be glad and rejoice in his salvation.

The Word of the Lord.

The second reading was by Janet (Middleton) Schlitt, daughter of Marilyn.

A Reading from the Second Letter of St. Paul to Timothy (4: 6-8, 18a)

As for me, I am already being poured out like a libation,

and the time of my departure has come.

I have fought the good fight,

I have finished the race,

I have kept the faith.

From now on there is reserved for me the crown of righteousness,

which the Lord, the righteous judge,

will give me on that day,

and not only to me,

but also to all who have longed for his appearing.

To him be the glory for ever and ever,

Amen

The Word of the Lord.

The Intercessions were read by Barb (Janicki) Pardy, friend of the family.

Father Katzenberger: With faith and trust in a God who hears our prayers, let us place our needs, the needs of the community and those of the world before Him.

Barb: Our response to the petitions is: Hear our Prayer

All: Hear our Prayer

Barb:

In Baptism, Marilyn received the light of Christ. Scatter the darkness now and lead her over the waters of death.

Lord in your mercy...

Our sister was nourished at the table of the Lord. Welcome her into the halls of the heavenly banquet.

Lord in your mercy…

Many friends and members of our families have gone before us and await the kingdom. Grant them an everlasting home with your Son.

Lord in your mercy…

Many people die by violence, war, and famine each day. Show your mercy to those who suffer so unjustly these sins against your love and gather them into the eternal kingdom of peace.

Lord in your mercy…

Those who trusted in the Lord now sleep in the Lord. Give refreshment, rest and peace to all whose faith is known to you alone.

Lord in your mercy…

The family and friends of Marilyn seek comfort and consolation. Heal their pain and dispel the darkness and doubt that come from grief.

Lord in your mercy…

We are assembled here in faith and confidence to pray for our sister Marilyn. Strengthen our hope so that we may live in the expectation of your Son’s coming.

Lord in your mercy…

Father Katzenberger:

Heavenly Father, we ask that you hear these prayers and petitions we make today. May you grant them be it your will – through Christ our Lord.

In 2004, Marilyn’s children gave her a Mother’s Day gift of their memories of her, collected inside a treasure box adorned with this poem:

Contained in this box there are just a few

Of the wonderful memories we have of you

Throughout our lives you have given us so much

The depths of our hearts reached with your touch

Family is a treasure, a gift like no other

But nothing compares to the love of your mother

Love Rick, Patti, Jan, Brad, and Bryan

Patti: You and I getting dressed up on Halloween on the spur of the moment - hopping into the car to see which of her friends were game also.

Rick: You were in the sewing room one night in early 1967. You asked a question, it went like this: “Guess what you are going to get early this summer?” I probably responded, “I don’t know.” My mind was thinking electric guitar. It was even better. We got Brad.

Jan: That you showed me the importance and value of friendship and how your best friends like Jean and Diane always made me feel special in their lives. I know through this example I will be able to do the same for Carter.

Brad: One of my first memories of you dates back to what must have been 1972, when I was five years old. Not being able to sleep, I ran upstairs to your bedroom and I'm sure you were either reading or knitting. I climbed into bed and told you that I couldn't sleep. I remember you giving me a hug and quietly asking, “Do you miss your father?” I nodded, and shortly thereafter I drifted off to sleep. To this day I find that being around you or just hearing your voice makes me feel better no matter how bad of a day I am having.

Bryan: There are all the memories of Belwood Lake — how about the Toga Parties at the Bradley’s!

Jan: The times you made us clean out the outhouse at the cottage — showed us that a little hard work was a good thing.

Brad: During my high school years, one of my morning rituals involved making you a coffee. It was always instant, always black, and I always ran it upstairs and set it among the curling irons and other things scattered about the sink area of the bathroom. I guess that's where my love of coffee began; luckily it didn't carry over to the curling irons!

Patti: Always knowing I had a party when she was at Wasaga- no matter how hard I tried she found some evidence....like beer bottle caps in the push down ashtray.

Rick: The look on your face one Sunday morning. You were out at Hillside at the trailer and came in to go to church. You decided to stop at the house before going back to the trailer. We were still cleaning up from a party. There were four or five motorcycles on the front lawn and cars everywhere.

Jan: The time you whacked me with your shoes when you walked in the door because I was screwing up in school — thanks!

Patti: Making hot meals at lunch time when she was on maternity leave for Janet.

Jan: The way you love music and the way you passed that on to your children...the music we listen to may be different however the enjoyment we get from it is not...and of course, Louis Armstrong.

Patti: Glenn Miller, Ray Coniff, Herb Alpert.

Brad: So maybe I wasn't a musical prodigy, however you were at every one of my high school band concerts. You said you enjoyed them, but of course looking back I can't see how that was even possible. Sitting for two hours listening to some of your favourite big band songs being butchered by teenagers? Still, it was always great knowing you were out there in the audience.

Patti: Telling me to take “She Loves You” off the record player after I played it about twenty times in a row.

Jan: When we brought all the kids to the Lancaster Hotel for the first time and how proud both you and Ray looked to have all of us there with you to show to your "jazz friends".

Brad: I remember many times going to Gary Goad's office after school, usually waiting for you to finish up a few things. It seemed as though you were always the last one to leave. Seeing how hard you worked, it's no surprise that I in turn have developed such a strong work ethic.

Rick: We were sleeping out and got brought home around three in the morning. Mom answered the door and woke up dad off the couch. Her comment was “He's your son!” The police had brought us home.

Jan: The way you welcomed my friends into your home without question, and how many of those friends of such fond memories of you, my mother.

Rick: I was waiting for my friend Roger as we were going roller-skating. I had this huge boil on my neck that I did not want to deal with. You informed me that if I didn't let you drain it, I could not go skating. Boy did that hurt! You were right again.

Jan: The day you and Ray got married and how happy I was that someone was going to take care of my mother. When we surprised you at your front door on your 65th birthday.

Rick: Happy that Ray and you are now able to enjoy the retirement years that you both richly deserve.

Brad: Attending University was a big step for me, and even though I was only in a town 30 minutes away from Cambridge, I still missed my mom. Your frequent visits while I was living both off and on campus always meant a great deal to me, and I'm not just talking about the care packages you would always bring with you.

Jan: The day I gave birth to Carter. The day Carter and I brought Max to your house.

Patti: Always forgiving us and loving us no matter what we did. Teaching us to never go to bed angry.

Brad: I remember so many nights when you would come home after a hard-days work and make dinner. I would hang out in the kitchen, probably sitting on the floor and being in your way. But as soon as dinner was ready, I'd head downstairs to watch TV while I ate. These days, as I get older and find it increasingly difficult to spend time at home, I look back on those nights and wish I had spent more time at the table talking to you and less time sitting in front of the television.

Jan: Heat the Seat.

Patti: Heat the seat.

Brad: I remember many nights sitting on the floor around your sewing room while you worked at your sewing machine. I'd find little bits of material here and there, which I would try to rework into clothes for my action figures. Of course, none of the clothes I made ever lasted, yet the fond memory of those nights still does.

Patti: Yanking me out of bed to go look for a job the day after labour day, even though I had a horrid hangover. Putting up with me when I had too many beers.

Jan: The first time you caught me drinking and the second time (although I denied it).

Jan: The strength you passed onto me — you showed me that a woman can be independent yet still dependent on others.

Brad: I recall coming home that first Christmas after I had been living in Vancouver, it had been over a year since I had seen you or any other family members. You were a sight for sore eyes when I first saw you at the airport! A few days later, when you woke me up Christmas morning, you kissed my forehead and told me how happy you were to have me at home again. Although I've become accustomed to being far away from everyone, it hasn't really gotten any easier. Yet reflecting on moments such as that Christmas morning makes me feel like I'm not so far away after all.

Brad: I don't know how you did it, yet each year while growing up, I would always have more than my fair share of presents to open on Christmas morning. I'm sure you must have had a fit each time I'd throw open the Christmas Wish Book and circle yet another toy for my wish list. Even though I asked for more than I could ever get, I instinctively knew that the year's hottest toy would always be waiting for me underneath the Christmas tree.

Jan: The Christmas I opened my disc camera, and you weren't awake to see it because I did it when I got home from a party. The Christmas I got the Chicopee season ski pass in my stocking. The Christmas you gave us kids our scrapbooks.

Patti: Christmas Eve dinners of ham and scalloped potatoes. Angel hair on the Christmas tree.

Patti: Having a fit when you thought your streaked hair was too blonde and you thought you looked like a floozie.

Rick: Going to pick you up at the hairdresser and driving right by and going around the block, as I didn't recognize you. Way too many highlights in your hair.

Jan: When you got your hair streaked and you were a beautiful blonde.

Patti: Drinking blueberry tea with Jeannie till we heard the birds chirping. You and Jean taking a shift at Gary's office when you both had hangovers.

Jan: Going to Grandmas house for Sunday dinners. Being treated to a meal at the Eat 'N’ Putt.

Patti: Putting horrible tasting brown stuff on my fingers to make me stop biting my fingernails.

Giving us cod liver Oil in the winter months- blech!

Brad: Another memory dating back to the 1970s: I woke up in the wee hours of the morning to the sound of chatter coming from the kitchen. There I found you and Jean redecorating the dining room, and in the middle of putting up the faux brickwork. I'm sure I was quickly told to “get back to bed” — I recall being told this on many occasions over the years. I often wondered how you found the time to take care of everything that you had to do and realize now that you could only have done so by giving up the luxury of having a full-night's sleep.

Patti: Cross country skiing and tennis lessons...and a lot of laughing. Liking George Barker...disliking Brian Russell.

Rick: Flashback to 1967...1 was asked to go to the Sadie Hawkins dance, and I think that I did not want to go as I was scared. You made sure that I was ready to go. I don't remember the girl’s name and I'm not sure if I had a good time or not.

Jan: That you love me unconditionally. That I love you unconditionally.

Patti: Waking up to freshly baked muffins. Always making the best desserts, especially cream puffs. Still baking cookies at midnight, the night before leaving for our vacations to the beach. Gingerbread cake, hot lemon sauce. Chili sauce, mustard relish and strawberry jam.

Jan: How the smell of cabbage rolls cooking at I in the morning could wake me from a deep sleep and I would get up to have one to nibble on. Roast beef, ham and scalloped potatoes, cream puffs, gingerbread cake and lemon sauce. -what a wonderful, amazing chef you are!

Patti: Helping me when I was stuck on decimals in grade five. Finishing my project on the sun in grade seven.

Rick: You, Tim and I want to know who bought those beautiful red running shoes from Westgate Plaza. We could not remember if you did or if we did. We also could not think of the name of the store.

Patti: Always making me wear the straps on my black or white patent dress shoes the proper way even though you could wear them at the back and have slip on shoes.

Jan: Watching the miniseries ROOTS on television. Anxiously awaiting in line to read the next book in the John Jakes War Series.

Patti: Making us matching outfits. Making Mary Taylor a couple of tops to match mine because Mrs. Taylor couldn't sew. Making skating costumes. Practically sewing my entire suit in home etc. class, as she knew how hopeless I was at it. Whipping me up a new skirt or dress to wear for civvies day or a school dance. Making Barbie clothes for Dot and the church bazaars.

Brad: I don't know where to begin with the memories of Halloweens gone by. I was always the best-costumed kid on the block. No matter what I wanted to be, from Darth Vader to Superman to a chimpanzee from Planet of the Apes, you were always able to make my Halloween dream come true. And who else would allow their basement to be turned into a haunted house?

Patti: Your courage and strength at raising a family alone. Always putting your kids first. Your values; your faith, and sense and love of family and friends.

Jan: The times you showed me what a great and powerful thing faith in God is.

Patti: Always having a nice black dress for special occasions. Your love of spiked heels and your hatred of the clunky styles. A closet full of shoes and purses-always matching her outfits.

Bryan: Let's go way back, as far as I can remember, my parents were at your house on Tait Street. They were getting to drinking....imagine that, and it was getting past my bedtime. So, I was put to bed in Brad's room, on the top bunk. Well, you were pretty nervous about me sleeping up there (not sure if my parents cared or not), so you took many pairs of your nylons and strung them across the posts of the bed at the top so I wouldn't fall down. Not sure if it would have helped but the thought was there.

Patti: Giving me a perm in grade five the night before school pictures.

Rick: Flashback to grade 8 and school picture day at St. Gregory's. Yes, you can wear your John Lennon hat to school, but you cannot wear it for the pictures. Boy did I look stupid with that hat on.

Bryan: All the memories at your old cottage down the lake, lots of memories there. ...especially the tours on the houseboat with Curly and Kitten.

Jan: All the memories of Belwood Lake and there are too many to mention however, the day your mother wore pants really sticks out in my mind. Diane Bradley doing swan lake at the cottage.

Patti: CWL Mother and Daughter Communion breakfasts.

Jan: All the garage sales, flea markets and auction sales you dragged us to as kids and now I am doing the same with mine! The garage sale you, Aunt Mary and I stayed at all morning in Belwood because they kept bringing out more stuff.

Brad: I recall so many occasions shopping with you, being “dragged” from store to store as you looked at racks and racks of clothing (or so it seemed at the time). I'm sure between stores I gave you some sort of look, and you'd say, "just one more", and we'd be on our way. Still, looking back it must have been a fun time for me. I distinctly recall one Christmas in the mid-90's when, after taking a red-eye from Vancouver to Toronto, I was yet again subjected to being dragged through a mall before we returned home, even though I had been up for about 18 hours straight. Of course, I gave you some sort of look and you told me “Just one more”, and to be honest, I didn't mind one bit. It reminded me of those times as a kid and brought a smile to my face.

Jan: That you showed me what it is to be a loving, caring parent. The day you comforted me when my 6 friends drowned in the boating accident. That you have always been there when I needed you. All the times we have laughed together, all the times we have cried together.

Patti: You saving up for a whole year to pay off my camel coat with the racoon collar.

Rick: For some reason when we lived on East Street, I wanted to leave home. Mom and Dad tried to talk me out of it. I wouldn't listen, so they packed me a few things and said something like “there you go”. I didn't leave.

Patti: Channel No. 5.

Bryan: I can remember towing the snowmobile trailer down the road behind Ed's lawn tractor with a picnic table in it and all the adults sitting around it drinking...oh what a sight that was.

Rick: Just being able to help at some of your parties and later attending them. You have had so many good friends, and everyone always had such a great time.

Jan: Your Halloween parties and the fact that I cannot seem to get rid of the Halloween boxes because they have always been a part of my life.

Brad: An extended awning hoisted over the walkway to our side door. A mobile, electric sign parked on our front lawn. Countless people dressed up in costumes. Bobbing for apples in a big metal tub in our basement. I may be mixing up a few festivities here, but they all leave me with a distinct memory: you know how to laugh, have fun, and go out of your way to make sure that others have the opportunity to do the same. I think your sense of humour is hereditary.

Patti: Your fun parties with your crazy friends.

Jan: The time you went looking for “munchies” in the grocery store.

Jan: The day we went and picked out Casey. All the times that Casey ran away and how happy we felt when he made his return.

Brad: I can still remember the sound of your car pulling up into the driveway as you returned home from work. Usually, Casey instinctively knew that Mom was about to arrive, and he'd already be on the way to the door before I even heard the car. Even as Casey got older and couldn't move quite as well as he used to, he would still manage to find the strength to run to the door when I'd tell him, '"Mom's home!"

Jan: Camping at Hillside. The time Brad's finger almost fell off when we were camping with Ray, Loraine and Bryan.

Bryan: When we were in Florida, we went to Rosie O'Grady's. There we saw, what I was calling, the "won-ton" girls. They performed their dance on top of the bar. You thought this was very funny that I was calling them the won-ton girls. I think they were supposed to be called the can-can girls.

Patti: Taking Rick and I to see The Shaggy Dog and having to sit in the front row. Walking downtown to the market on Saturday mornings. Going to the shoe outlets with her and always coming home with a purchase. Saturday night drive ins and hating having to wear my pjs. Picnics and Sunday drives, Soper Park.

Brad: Back in 1992 1 decided I needed to “get away from it all” to try to figure out just what I was going to do with my life. Choosing to move to Vancouver, the hardest thing I had to do was say goodbye to my mom. Even though I had no idea how long I would be away, leaving was still very difficult, yet when I saw you that last day in Guelph, you were very strong and didn't cry. The move to Vancouver resulted in many interesting times for me over the years, none of which I could have enjoyed had you not put on such a brave face that first day when I left for the West coast.

Patti: Wrapping her up do in toilet paper at bedtime. Your pink lounging pajamas. Bobby pins, kiss curls, wave clips.

Jan: Sleeping with rollers, toilet paper and pins stuck in your head and the various wigs and/or hair pieces you had over the years.

Jan: Watching you and Ray Jive at the Breslau restaurant on the dance floor by yourselves with Brad, Bryan and myself watching and just smiling.

Patti: Your love of dancing.

Patti: The time you and Aunt Mary made us kids wait while you picked through all the Christmas decorations just so you could get all the Seven Dwarfs.

Jan: You drove to London on New Year’s Eve through that wicked snowstorm. The Dodge Dart's doors would open when you went around some corners.

Brad: Whenever I'm standing around the kitchen to find something to munch on, there's a good chance you will smile and ask, “Are you starvin'-marvin'?” I have no idea what that means, but it still brings a smile to my face whenever I picture you saying it. To this day, no matter how hard I try, I still can't make something as simple as toast and jam taste as good as when you make it.

Jan: The day we got the cheque for $900 for the orphan's benefit.

Jan: The letter you wrote to me when I was at Mount Mary's retreat in Grade 8 and how loved I felt when I read it.

Patti: Getting upset when I shoved a button up my nose. Getting very upset when Rick and I fought and broke the poodle lamp on Grand Ave.

Jan: The night I watched you rock back and forth in pure pain at the kitchen table when you had just found out that David had died and how helpless I felt.

Patti: Being so strong for us and holding us together when David died, even when you were dying inside.

Rick: Just being so strong as mother and a friend with all you had to deal with by yourself at such a young age. I don't know how you did it, but I do know that you did. We are who we are today because of you. We thank you for that mom.

Jan: The way you raised us, loved us and always made sure we never wanted for a thing...I do know how you did it...you are strong, loving, kind and have the faith of God to carry you through...you are simply amazing!

Brad: As an adult I find that sometimes things can be difficult, and you run into situations that can make life a little tough. Yet I always reflect on just how difficult it must have been for you to raise a family on your own, and it puts everything into perspective. No matter what the future holds for me, knowing what you were able to accomplish makes me realize that I'll be able to overcome any challenges that may lie ahead.

* * * * * * * * * *

Our mother, born Marilyn Patricia Schefter, was an amazing woman. Loving, kind, thoughtful, and honest, she was an incredible role model--and she was ours! Mom was born in Guelph and then moved to Galt, residing in Cambridge for most of her life.

Her first husband, Ray Middleton, succumbed to leukaemia in 1972 at the age of 39, leaving her to raise their five children on her own. Five years later, their son David died in a car accident at the age of 18. Some may have given into the tragedy that had seemingly become their life, but not our mom! She was strong and courageous, had faith in God, with a multitude of support and love from our amazing family and her dear friends.

Mom was a legal secretary, working for several offices including Goad and Goad, Ben Unger, and Tait and McDonald. She worked tirelessly to provide for her family, and her children were never want of anything. In 1984, she married Ray Norris who has one son Bryan. They had celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary in December of 2014, but shortly thereafter he passed away.

Our mom had dementia, and as the disease progressed the mother we had known began to slowly fade and we could do little to help her with her cognitive difficulties. All we could do was love and support her in every way possible, taking her to places that were familiar and doing things she loved to do. This included roaming through antique and thrift stores, visiting her family and friends, attending Blue Jays games, taking many walks, and listening to live jazz on Saturday afternoons. She loved music, dogs, travelling, dancing, gardening, hosting dinner parties, crafting and costume making, and most of all just spending time with her family and friends.

She was predeceased by her parents, Herman and Gladys, sisters Verda and Mary (Allan), brothers Austin (Alice) and Charlie, niece Jackie, and sister-in-law Judy. She will be lovingly remembered and missed dearly by her younger brother Bill and all her nieces and nephews.

Forever remembering her with deep love and gratitude are her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren: Patti and Bill (Shane (Fanny), Kyle, Blair (Lisa)), Rick and Carolyn (Connie and Jay (Ben), Allan (Oliver)), Janet (Carter), Brad, and Bryan (Jessica (Elijah, Amiyah), Brendan, Shannon).

We miss our mother tremendously. The love we have for her is endless and will carry us through this, the saddest of times, just as she taught us it would. Rest in peace mom. The love that surrounded you on earth is equally abundant in heaven. Till we meet again, we will miss and love you always Mom xo.

Special thanks to the 4th floor staff at the Hilltop Manor in Cambridge, and The Ellington in Guelph who helped us care for her during the last years of her life.

Visitation will be held at Coutts Funeral Home, 96 St. Andrews Street, Cambridge on Thursday, February 17, from 2-4pm and 7-9pm. There will be a Funeral Mass held at St. Gregory’s Church at 11am on Friday, February 18 with a reception to follow at Coutts Funeral Home. Burial will be at a later date.

In lieu of flowers, charitable donations may be made to The Alzheimer’s Society of Canada.