Caroline N. Hodowal

Caroline N. Hodowal passed away peacefully at the age of 78 in Carmel, Indiana on August 4 after a brief battle with acute leukemia. She was born in Hammond, Indiana on September 3, 1942 to her parents, the late Donald and Rose Norris. She was pre-deceased by her beloved son Phillip Bainbridge, Jr. of Tampa, Florida. She is survived by her dear brothers, Robert Norris of Indianapolis, Indiana and Donald Norris of Hattiesburg, Mississippi.

Caroline studied elementary education at Indiana State University leading to her first jobs as a first and fifth grade teacher. She was a founding member of the P.E.O. Chapter in Carmel, Indiana. PEO is a philanthropic organization where women celebrate and advance other women through education scholarships, grants, and loans. She lived most of her life in northwest and central Indiana, and although she lived in Naples, Florida in the colder months in her later years, she always considered Indiana home.

Caroline married Phillip Bainbridge and raised her four children in Munster and Carmel, Indiana. After divorcing in 1991, Caroline met and married her loving husband, John Hodowal. John and Caroline married in March 1993 and had a wonderful 28 years of marriage together. They fully embraced and loved each other’s families, and they loved life together. They enjoyed riding motorcycles, attending Cub games, traveling, and especially being with family and friends.

Caroline loved her family and her grandchildren. She especially cherished her role as mother and as “BeMa” and “Scoo” to her grandchildren. She made them feel loved and always made time for whatever was important to them. Caroline was always optimistic and always found something good or positive in everything she did or situation she encountered. She loved a funny story, had a great sense of humor, and loved to laugh. Those who had the pleasure of knowing her knew the warmth of her smile could light up any room.

Caroline is survived by her husband, John Hodowal; son Mark Bainbridge (Lisa); daughter Katharine Bainbridge (Guy Blume); son Jonathon Bainbridge; grandchildren Cameron and Carter Bainbridge (Mark); daughter-in-law Suzanne Bainbridge (Phil); grandchildren Jennifer, Stephanie and Christina Bainbridge, step-son-in-law Paul Miller and step-daughter-in-law Laura Hodowal Miller; grandchildren Abigail, Paul, and John Charles, step-daughter-in law Melissa Hodowal and granddaughter Karissa Hodowal; sisters-in-law Sara Norris (Robert) and Lola Norris (Donald); nieces and nephews Benjamin, Dana, Lia, and Robert Norris.

We will honor Caroline at a Celebration of Life Service at Second Presbyterian Church in Indianapolis, Indiana on Friday, September 10th with calling there beginning at 10:00am and concluding at time of services at 11:00 am.

In lieu of flowers donations can be made in Caroline’s honor to The Julian Center in Indianapolis, Indiana.

CAROLINE HODOWAL

CELEBRATION OF LIFE – SEPTEMBER 10, 2021

GOOD MORNING… ON BEHALF OF OUR ENTIRE FAMILY, THANK YOU ALL FOR COMING THIS MORNING.

YOU KNOW, IF I HAD TO DESCRIBE MY WIFE, CAROLINE IN JUST TWO WORDS, THOSE WORDS WOULD BE...

"CLASS ACT." SHE CARED ABOUT EVERYONE SHE EVER MET, OLD AND YOUNG, AND REGARDLESS OF GENDER OR RACE. SHE WAS OPEN TO ALL POINTS OF VIEW, WHETHER THE TOPIC WAS RELIGIOUS, POLITICAL OR SOCIAL. SHE WAS CONSIDERATE, KIND, WISE AND GIVING. SHE WAS LOYAL TO HER FAMILY AND TO HER FRIENDS. SHE GAVE HER BEST ADVICE TO THOSE WHO ASKED FOR IT, AND ALWAYS HAD THE BACKS OF THOSE SHE LOVED. SHE COULD KEEP SECRETS AND WAS NEVER JUDGMENTAL. AND… CAN YOU IMAGINE… ALL OF THAT… PACKAGED INTO THIS LITTLE 5’ 1½” GAL… AND LET ME TELL YOU…THAT HALF INCH WAS VERY IMPORTANT TO HER.

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FOR NEARLY 30 YEARS, I HAD THE GREAT PLEASURE OF SHARING MY LIFE WITH CAROLINE. AND I WOULD LIKE TO SHARE A LITTLE OF THAT LIFE WITH YOU THIS MORNING AND, ALSO, TALK ABOUT SOME OF THE MUSIC THAT WE ENJOYED.

NOW, EVEN THOUGH SHE WAS 5’ 1½” AND I WAS 6’ 5”, WE SAW EYE-TO-EYE ON NEARLY EVERYTHING. IN FACT, THE ONLY TIME WE DIDN’T SEE EYE TO EYE WAS WHEN WE WERE DANCING. HOWEVER, THANKS TO A LITTLE ESTABLISHMENT KNOWN AS THE “WINDMILL CAFÉ,” THAT USED TO BE ON 106TH STREET, JUST WEST OF MICHIGAN ROAD, WE LEARNED HOW TO TWO-STEP. AND FOR 30 YEARS, WE TWO-STEPPED TO EVERY SONG WE DANCED TO, WHETHER IT WAS A COUNTRY WESTERN SONG OR A WALTZ. ONE NIGHT, I ASKED THE BANDLEADER WHETHER THEY KNEW “CRAZY.” THE SONG THAT WILLIE NELSON WROTE AND PATSY CLINE MADE FAMOUS.

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WELL, OF COURSE THEY KNEW “CRAZY”… AND AFTER THAT, EVERY TIME WE WENT TO THE WINDMILL CAFÉ, THE BAND WOULD STOP WHAT THEY WERE PLAYING AND PLAY "CRAZY" FOR US…THAT SONG SORT OF BECAME OUR ANTHEM, AND WE DANCED TO IT ALL OVER THIS COUNTRY AND EVEN ON TRIPS OVERSEAS.

BUT, OUR COUNTRY'S NATIONAL ANTHEM WAS REALLY THE MOST IMPORTANT ANTHEM TO US. IN 1999, WE HAD THE GREAT GOOD FORTUNE TO MEET 96 OF OUR NATIONS MOST PRESTIGIOUS HEROES…WE GOT TO MEET 96 RECIPIENTS OF THE CONGRESSIONAL MEDAL OF HONOR. AT THE TIME, THERE WERE ONLY 150 MEDAL OF HONOR RECIPIENTS ALIVE. TODAY, ONLY 103 ARE ALIVE. BUT, IN 1999, 96 CAME TO INDIANAPOLIS AT OUR INVITATION TO BE HONORED BY OUR CITY. CAROLINE AND I PLAYED A SMALL ROLE IN THE CREATION AND PRESENTATION OF THE MEDAL OF HONOR MEMORIAL, LOCATED ON THE CANAL IN DOWNTOWN INDIANAPOLIS.

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THE REAL CREDIT, FOR ALL THAT WAS ACCOMPLISHED, GOES TO ALL OF THE VOLUNTEER EMPLOYEES OF IPL (INDIANAPOLIS POWER AND LIGHT COMPANY) ...AND TO OUR BOARD OF DIRECTORS, WHO CARRIED THE PROJECT FORWARD SO THAT ALL INDIANAPOLIS' CHILDREN TO SEE WHAT REAL HEROES LOOKED LIKE. AND, YOU KNOW WHAT, THEY DIDN’T LOOK LIKE BATMAN AND SUPERMAN… THEY LOOKED JUST LIKE THEIR DADS AND THEIR GRANDPAS. THAT PARTICULAR INDY 500 WEEKEND, WHEN THE MEDAL OF HONOR RECIPIENTS CAME TO INDIANAPOLIS, WAS ONE OF THE ABSOLUTE HIGHLIGHTS OF OUR LIVES.

NOW, IN ADDITION TO "CRAZY" AND "OUR NATIONAL ANTHEM," OTHER SONGS WERE IMPORTANT TO US. I WOULD BE SURPRISED IF A GREAT NUMBER OF YOU HERE THIS MORNING DON'T REGARD THE SONG “AT LAST" AS YOUR SONG. IT CERTAINLY WAS ONE OF OUR SONGS AND THE WORDS WERE SPECIAL AND SIGNIFICANT TO US… “AT LAST MY LOVE HAS COME ALONG.”

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THOSE WORDS SPOKE TO US…AND…THAT SONG WAS ONCE AGAIN IMPORTANT TO US IN 2011. AND I’LL TELL YOU WHY…YOU SEE… FOR MOST OF OUR TIME TOGETHER, CAROLINE WANTED A DOG. I RESISTED FOR ABOUT 20 YEARS. I GAVE HER A LOT OF STUFFED DOGS – EVEN ONE YOU PUT BATTERIES IN TO LOOK LIKE IT WAS BREATHING - BUT, WHEN WE GOT OUR IRISH TERRIER ABOUT 10 YEARS AGO, WE NAMED HER MCGRAW. MCGRAW MEANS "MY LOVE" IN GAELIC. SO, IT BECAME CLEAR TO ME, AT LEAST, THAT THE WORDS OF THE SONG "AT LAST" MEANT TO CAROLINE, IN 2011 THAT AT LAST ANOTHER LOVE, HER DOG MCGRAW, HAD COME ALONG...AND MCGRAW HAS SHARED OUR LOVE AND OUR LIVES EVER SINCE.

THE SONGS, "SWEET CAROLINE" BY NEIL DIAMOND, "YOU ARE MY SUNSHINE" BY MORGAINE AND CHRIS STAPLETON, AND “SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW” BY EVA CASSIDY, WERE ALSO VERY IMPORTANT TO US.

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"THE WIFFENPOOF SONG," WHICH WE SANG FOR MANY YEARS WITH A GROUP OF OUR FRIENDS WE CALL "THE BONDERS," WAS ALSO SPECIAL TO US. AT THE CALLING TODAY, BEFORE THIS SERVICE, YOU MAY HAVE HEARD ALL THOSE SONGS AND NOW YOU KNOW WHY THEY MADE THEIR WAY ONTO OUR PLAYLIST TODAY.

CAROLINE, ABOVE ALL ELSE, WAS A KIND PERSON. HER CLOSE FRIENDS WERE HER BED ROCK… PHYLISS, HELEN, SUSAN, BETH, NANCY, JAN, GWEN, SUE, MARILYN, JAY BIRD, BILLIE, LIBBY, MARJORIE, PATTI, ELAINE, MEL, NONA, ANNIE. AND, DID I MENTION BILL TOLBERT? EACH HAD A SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP WITH HER AND THEY ALL KNEW THAT EACH OF THEM WAS SPECIAL TO HER.

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CAROLINE, ALONG WITH HER BROTHERS, DON AND ROB AND SISTERS-IN-LAW LOLA AND SARA, WERE ALL INVETERATE READERS, GREAT SPEAKERS, WRITERS, EDUCATORS AND EDITORS. THEY ALL COULD ENGAGE IN SPIRITED DISCUSSIONS FOR HOURS AND EVEN DAYS. I LEARNED A LOT OVER MANY YEARS BY JUST LISTENING TO THEM.

HER GREATEST LOVE IN LIFE, THOUGH, WERE CHILDREN… ALL CHILDREN, HERS AND THOSE BELONGING TO OTHERS, AND WHICH SHE REFERRED TO…ALL OF THEM…AS CHILDRINKS. SHE WAS KNOWN AS BEMA TO MARK, LISA, PHILIP, SUZANNE, KATHERINE, GUY, JONATHON, CAMERON, CARTER, JENNIFER, STEPHANIE AND CHRISTINA. AND SHE WAS KNOWN AS SCOO TO LAURA, BUBBA, MELISSA, ABBY, PAUL, JOHNNY AND KARISSA. WHEN WE GATHERED FOR FAMILY EVENTS, YOU COULD FIND CAROLINE SITTING AT THE LITTLE PETER RABBIT TABLE WITH ONE OF THE CHILDRINKS READING BOOKS, COLORING PICTURES OR PIECING PUZZLES TOGETHER.

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SHE WOULD TEACH EACH OF HER GRANDCHILDREN THAT A NAP WAS REALLY “A WEENY SNOOZEL”; THAT THE AIRPLANE WAS REALLY “A FOO BIRD”; AND, THAT A RABBIT WAS REALLY “A RAZZIE.” AND, THEY ALSO HEARD HER END A SUGGESTION WITH THE QUESTION, “WANT TO?” …SUCH AS… “WE’RE GOING TO TAKE A WEENY SNOOZEL NOW”… “WANT TO?”. THEY ALWAYS SAID “YES.”

CAROLINE WANTED TO HOLD NEWSPAPERS IN HER HANDS, NOT READ NEWS ON THE COMPUTER. HER FAVORITE TV SHOW FOR THE WHOLE YEAR WAS "THE WESTMINSTER DOG SHOW." SHE READ ALL OF THE 2000 BOOKS LOCATED ALL OVER OUR HOUSE, SOMETIMES MORE THAN ONCE OR TWICE. SHE WAS A "ONE DRINK LADY" WHEN WE WENT TO DINNER. SHE OFTEN TOLD PEOPLE WHO WOULD ASK FOR HER OPINION THAT SHE WAS A "PROCESS PERSON" AND WOULD GET BACK TO THEM AFTER SHE THOUGHT ABOUT IT AND CAREFULLY CONSIDERED THE WHOLE ISSUE…AND SHE DID.

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SHE BELIEVED THAT GOD KNEW YOUR WHOLE LIFE'S PLAN FROM THE MOMENT OF CONCEPTION. AND SHE BELIEVED THAT GOD PICKED OUT YOUR SOUL WHO WOULD BE WITH YOU FOR YOUR WHOLE LIFE. SHE WAS NOT AFRAID TO DIE AND SHE DID NOT WANT TO LIVE ONCE LIFE HAD NO MEANING OR PURPOSE. WHEN IT CAME TIME FOR HER TO CHOOSE BETWEEN CHEMO OR HOSPICE, SHE CHOSE HOSPICE.

SO NOW, IN SUMMARY, I LEAVE YOU WITH THESE WORDS. CAROLINE WAS A BEAUTIFUL, SMART, GIVING, UPLIFTING, PATIENT, GENEROUS, PROUD AND CARING PERSON...I CALLED HER SHORTY… SHE CALLED ME BG, WHICH STANDS FOR BIG GALOOT. WE HAD 30 BEAUTIFUL YEARS. AND, LIKE I SAID AT THE OUTSET, SHE WAS A CLASS ACT...SHE WILL ALWAYS BE IN MY HEART AND IN THE HEARTS OF ALL THOSE WHO EVER MET HER.

GOD BLESS YOU ALL! ... THANK YOU!

Caroline Hodowal and each of us, are wholly accepted and beloved by God, through the life, death and resurrection of Jesus the living Christ. And our response to God’s infinite love, which abides in us, is to love God, each other, our neighbors and our enemies as we love ourselves.

Caroline graciously modeled the human expression of God’s infinite love. It is a precious gift to meet a human being in whom love – and this means God – is so overwhelmingly manifest. It is more than justice and it is greater than faith and hope. It is the presence of God, for God is love. And in every moment of genuine love, we are dwelling in God and God in us. Paul Tillich sums this up nicely for us. He says, “Love is the infinite given to the finite. Death has no power over love.”

It was during an early encounter with Caroline that I perceived and felt her gracious God-given Love. Isn’t this the wonderful power she continues to have over each of us? To be with Caroline was to be loved by her and naturally to love her back. She possessed from God this remarkable ability to love us unconditionally. We saw this love each time she smiled that beautiful Caroline smile. We heard this love each time she laughed and joked with us. And we felt this love whenever she patiently listened to us. I think that is why our hearts are still broken today… because Caroline, throughout her years of life, carefully and thoughtfully held our hearts right next to her heart!

In John 13, we hear a voice capturing Jesus’ words: “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all (people) will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.

And Caroline was certainly a faithful follower of Jesus. Let me share just a few ways in which Caroline shared her remarkable love from God.

When I first met Caroline, at one of John and Caroline’s Surprise Friday Parties, she was one of the kindest and most gracious hostesses I had ever met. I was new to the group, having been married to Skip (who one of the members of the group known as the golf Bonders) for a short time.

Caroline took a personal interest in everyone she hosted, including me that evening. We also enjoyed lunches together, and of course Bonder pot-luck gatherings which John and Caroline always hosted.

One encounter I particularly remember with Caroline was when she popped over for a visit at our home. We talked that day like two old and dear friends who trusted each other implicitly. Two women who could speak the truth in love to each other without reservation. We shared our stories of that time, and learned from the wisdom of each other. It was one of those loving encounters that you never forget. And before she left, we shared a faith-filled prayer of thanksgiving.

Caroline and I would enjoy only a few of these heartfelt conversations, with the majority of our exchanges happening through email due to Skip’s and my subsequent move to Nebraska.

Caroline was also a lover of music like me. She was immensely proud of all of her children and grandchildren, but when her son, Jonathon, would sing… you could see the brilliant joy and love light up her face and whole being. Music, which is known as the universal language of the world, was a powerful way for Caroline to experience love, joy, and gratitude for her extraordinary life. Caroline might well say to us today, “If music is the song of life – then sing on!”

Caroline experienced the love of God through dear family and friends thousands of times in her remarkable life. And wherever she found herself, she shared that powerful love with others. To know Caroline was to love her and to be loved right back.

I give thanks to God for the love Caroline authentically shared and enjoyed with John, her growing family, and many of us. The love we shared with her is from God and will never end. It participates in the eternal loving realm of God – now and forever.

By Caroline’s loving and compassionate presence in our lives, we have learned to be better followers of Jesus, loving each other as we have been loved.

I will remember Caroline by the way she lived her love from God authentically and out loud - with everyone she encountered. And we were so naturally compelled by her love… to simply love her back. This love will never end… Hear these words from the Apostle Paul:

“For I am persuaded that neither death nor life nor angels nor principalities nor powers nor things present nor things to come nor height nor depth nor any other creature shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

“Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things. Love never ends.”

Thank you, Caroline! And thanks be to God.

Rev. Nona Shockney Hodder

September 10, 2021

Good morning, friends and family. Thank you for joining today to celebrate and remember an amazing, colorful woman. For those I have not had a chance to meet, my name is Abby and I'm Caroline's granddaughter. Although, to me she isn't Caroline. She's Scoo. A name as unique and fun as Scoo herself. Now, as the eldest grandchild you might think I had the luxury of getting to choose her name. But one could argue it was Scoo, herself, who created it. She used to watch me scoot around the floor as a toddler, calling me "Scooty" as I did my best to run my parents ragged.. And from then on, Scoo stuck as I parroted back what I had heard.

This story is one that has been passed around the family for two­ and-a-half decades now. And, while I wish I could remember it myself, there are plenty of other memories that I do have of Scoo that I'd like to share today.

Perhaps one of the earliest memories I have is our "morning coffee" ..As we sat at the kitchen table watching the birds wake or the sky lighten, Scoo would put "just a drop" of coffee in my milk. Over time "just a drop of coffee" turned into "just a drop of milk".

I then remember our afternoons reading together. Scoo would take me into her study, or up into the barn to pick out a new book as I finished them. She was always encouraging :my passion for literature and emboldening me to read more complicated pieces as I aged. And boy did she have a bookshelf to choose from! I can still remember the day she handed me the first Harry Potter book. I didn't stand a chance - I was hooked. From then on, Scoo took me to each movie as it came out and would wait anxiously for me to bring over the latest copy as they were released.

This enthusiasm for books turned into a passion for plays. One day I found myself standing onstage, performing for my friends and family. And Scoo was always right there in the audience, a tiny flower in her hand. And when I had the opportunity to get involved in a Coca-Cola commercial, Scoo ,was the first to volunteer to make the four-hour drive to North Judson to set. And this is after spending the entire day before with n1e at the beauty parlor, getting pin curl after pin curl put in my hair. For nearly fourteen hours, Frops and Scoo waited patiently in their car nearby as we filmed. And when it was over, they met me with nothing but smiles and congratulations despite the long and tedious day. I still have a prop - a vintage glass bottle - on my nightstand. And each time it catches my eye I remember what Scoo whispered to me that day, as my nervous legs trembled, and my shaky palms began to sweat as I watched the cameras and booms set and the directors calling actors to places - she

whispered: Be bold and chase your dream. Never stop smiling.

And if you ever want to go home, you know right where we'll be.

You see , Scoo not only taught me to fiercely chase what I want in this life, but she always made sure to remind me where home is, should I ever need to rest my wings.

But perhaps some of the fondest memories I have with Scoo do not come from things or places. But rather from time. The Fall season, to be specific. And it is only fitting that we gather in the month of September to celebrate and remember Scoo as this time of year has always been a special to us. It's right now, in the Autumn months, that we would usually come back together as a family after summer camps and summer jobs ended. We'd celebrate birthdays and share first day of school stories. We'd grill out on the deck and swim on the weekends, enjoying those last

warm days. And when the leaves began to change color, as we see them starting to today, Scoo would point out how beautiful the changing treetops are, and how we were about to go through another season of change.

And that's where we find ourselves today. A season of change. Each one of us is here to celebrate and remember our lives with Scoo as a part of it. When we leave here, we will be walking out of this church united in a new season. One of reminiscence. And

while me way grieve her loss, we should never forget to rejoice in the daily glimpses of her we will get to see in the world around us. I, for one, know that whenever I breathe in the crisp cider­ scented autumn winds, or whenever my eyes catch the cover of the bright orange Harry Potter book on my desk, I'll be thinking of Scoo.

- Abby Miller's Remembarance