Emily von Borries Milks, 96, died on January 12, 2024, at Glenaire retirement community, where she had lived since 2010. She was born on February 28, 1927, in Winston-Salem, NC, the only child of Martin von Borries and Lucy Davis von Borries. In addition to her parents, she was predeceased by her husband, Robert Milks Sr., and a son, David Milks. Surviving are a son, Robert Milks Jr. (Frances) of Cary, and two daughters, Lucy Milks of Cary and Julie Harrelson (Larry) of Shallotte, NC; six grandchildren: Ryan Milks (Jenn) of Glen Ridge, NJ, Amelia Harrelson of Raleigh, Elizabeth Grimes (Dan) of Raleigh, Suzannah Harrelson of Raleigh, Emily Genther (Kyle) of Raleigh, and Cameron Milks of Raleigh; two step-grandchildren: John Fratianni (Annie) of Richmond, VA, and Alex Fratianni (Darcy) of Madeira Beach, FL; and four great-grandchildren.
Most of Emily’s early life was spent in Winston-Salem. During World War II, she worked after school at a factory making parts for the war effort; the workers learned only after the war that they had helped build rockets. After graduating from Reynolds High School in 1944, Emily attended Women’s College (now UNC-Greensboro) for two years before transferring to the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill. While at UNC, she was president of Spenser Dorm, a member of Pi Beta Phi sorority, a member of the Order of the Valkyries honor society, and a member of Phi Beta Kappa. She graduated with a BA degree in history in 1948.
Emily had served as a camp counselor at a YWCA camp while in high school and college, and upon graduating, she went to work for the national YWCA, which sent her to Bartlesville, OK, as a teen director at the Y there. After a couple of years, she returned to North Carolina, to serve as teen director at a YWCA in Charlotte. One evening at dinner she resumed acquaintance with a young man she had met when both were in the host couple’s wedding. Bob Milks had overlapped Emily’s time as students at UNC, but they had not known each other. They began dating, and were engaged when Bob, a World War II veteran, was recalled to active duty in the Air Force during the Korean War. They married in November 1951 and spent their honeymoon at Panama City, FL, where Bob was stationed. After the war ended, Bob returned to reserve status, but then went back on active duty in 1956.
From then until Bob retired at the end of 1973, Emily shepherded their four children as they moved from assignment to assignment: Alaska (when it was still a territory), Germany, Canada, and five continental US states. Among her adventures: gathering her children when Bob was away on assignment in a general panic when an evacuation drill in case of a Soviet attack in Alaska was mistakenly not announced as a drill, moving her family to within five miles of the East German and Czech borders as the Cuban missile crisis wound down, and leading the family alone for a year when Bob spent 1967 in Vietnam.
When he retired from the Air Force, he found a second career with the State of North Carolina in Raleigh and the family returned to North Carolina. After his second retirement in 1985, she and Bob traveled widely, visiting all seven continents, and once crossing the Atlantic on the Queen Elizabeth II and flying back on the Concorde. They enjoyed a happy marriage of more than 52 years before his death in 2004.
Emily served as a docent at the North Carolina Museum of History for many years and was an active member of First United Methodist Church of Cary. Proud of her German heritage, Emily attended several reunions of the von Borries family in Germany, the first in 1964 when she and Bob became the first from the American branch to attend since before World War I, the last in 2016 when she was 89.
Emily was friendly and outgoing, uncomplaining through many challenging years as an Air Force wife and mother and notable for the gratitude she continually expressed through her life. Both her parents were the youngest children in large families, and so Emily was younger than all her cousins and considerably younger than most of them, so she was the last link to a now-gone generation. Though she lived to be almost 97 and was in declining health in recent years, she will be greatly missed by family and friends.
A memorial service will be held at Glenaire in Cary at 3:00 p.m. on Friday, January 19.
Memorial contributions may be made to First United Methodist Church of Cary or a charity of your choice.
Fond memories and expressions of sympathy for the Milks family may be shared below.
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