Kevin Scott Vroome, 42, of Cary passed away December 7, 2015. He was born on March 24, 1973 in Lancaster, PA to Joy and Ray Vroome. Kevin was preceded in death by his paternal grandparents, Dorothy and Ray Vroome and his maternal grandfather, Andrew Hopper.
In addition to his parents, Kevin is survived by his wife, Alison Hall Vroome; two daughters, Sydney Vroome and Kate Vroome; sister, Chrissy Hartsfield and her husband, Drew; niece, Dylan and nephew, Andrew; and his grandmother, Ann Hopper.
Kevin graduated from East Mecklenburg High School in Charlotte, NC in 1991. He attended North Carolina State University and graduated with a degree in Business. He was currently employed by Teleflex Medical as a project manager. Kevin also attended Crosspointe Church in Cary.
Kevin was a dedicated and loving husband, father, son, brother, uncle, grandson and loyal friend to all his many friends. His family was the center of his world and all who knew him were witness to his kind and gentle soul. Kevin was a long-time fan of all NC State athletics and the NY Mets.
MEMORIAL MESSAGE BY PASTOR JONATHAN BOW OF CROSSPOINTE CHURCH
It truly is an honor to be with you today and to celebrate Kevin’s life with people who love him, who love his family, and have been inspired by the life he’s lived.
In the Scriptures it says, “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the Heavenly Lights.”
And in the few moments we have together, I’d like to share with you a few gifts God has given you….and given all of us. And that hopefully, even in the midst of the grief and sorrow, we may find ourselves able to recognize and be grateful for the good gifts God has given.
First, Kevin was, indeed, a wonderful gift from our Heavenly Father.
In the times I’ve been able to spend around Kevin’s family and friends this past week, listening to countless stories of this great man, a few things have become extremely obvious.
One, Kevin was loyal and full of joy.
Kevin was that person that everyone was so grateful was in their lives.
He was the one people knew they could count on. That he would have their backs.
Kevin refused to tolerate gossip about people. Rather, he was the one always trying to infuse into the conversation kind and positive words about people. Trying to see the best in others.
And because of that, people quickly learned that they could trust him. People would often confide in Kevin and ask for his insight, because they knew they weren’t going to be judged, that he would be loyal to them and their best interests.
That was Kevin.
And that same sense of loyalty carried over to not only his friends and family, but to his co-workers, and the company he worked for, to his fraternity, to his school, the Wolfpack and his beloved team-the NY Mets.
And all along the way, Kevin had a way of bringing joy with him. He had an infectious laugh and loved to make others laugh with his wit and dry sense of humor. With his girls especially, he loved to be silly and goofy and brighten their days however he could.
That was just Kevin. And it was evident to all who knew him.
Additionally though, it’s also been very apparent that Kevin was very analytical, very practical.
Kevin loved his spreadsheets. He loved looking at every angle of a problem and trying to figure out the most practical and rational decision. And he really applied that to every area of his life—except when it came to cars.
Like many men, rationale and practicality often go out the window when it starts to get in the way of a boy and his cars.
But in every other area, that analytical nature rang true in his life.
It showed up in his love for jigsaw puzzles. Where he loved taking thousands of pieces and putting them together—and would often find himself getting rather competitive with his family and especially his sister, who he deemed “the Puzzle Bully”, in who actually finished the puzzle—so much so that Kevin would often hide one piece of the puzzle so that it couldn’t ever be completely done until he put in the final piece.
His analytical nature made him great at his job as a project manager. Being able to organize steps and strategies and move people toward the successful completion of a project.
It showed up in his love for reading—devouring books about pretty much anything and everything. This unquenchable thirst to know and understand more about people, about life.
One of the things Alison shared with me was that Kevin had this really beautiful and unique ability to dive into and understand really complex things and then communicate those ideas to other people in ways everyone else could easily understand.
And so in my attempt to honor Kevin and his life, sorting through all the various complexities that mark the various dimensions of one’s life, if I wanted to try to explain what was most obvious about Kevin in a way we could all easily understand—it would be very simply that Kevin Vroome loved people.
That was Kevin. He loved people. And none more than his family. They were the greatest passion in his life—and it was obvious to those who knew him.
Now, Kevin was never one to draw attention to himself. In fact, I’m very confident he would be very uncomfortable with all the tributes made about him today, but that would all be rooted in his consistent desire to put the spotlight on others. To serve others. To love others.
And he did that incredibly well.
While there’s lots of things I could say in this regard, I believe our time is best served and that Kevin is most honored by hearing from the people who were loved by him the most.
His family members wrote some words this past week about his life that I’d like to share with you on their behalf:
To most of us in this room, Kevin was a beloved friend who made us all feel happy and at ease in his presence. But to a few lucky people in this room, Kevin was more than that. Those of us that got to call him dad, husband, son, brother, and uncle are among the luckiest people on earth. For we were blessed to have known and been loved by Kevin in a special way that truly allowed us to know the heart of an amazing man, day in and day out.
Kevin was everything a parent could want in a son and son-in-law. As a child Kevin was a sweet, loving little boy. He had great love and caring for his family as well as grandparents, cousins and friends. His compassionate side became evident early on as a child through his deep love of all animals and his gentleness towards them. When young he was obsessed with his "little" cars and had a multitude of them. (Fast forward to his car passion of today :) He was a good athlete, loving all sports, baseball being his favorite and was so thrilled to see the NY Mets play in the World Series this year. As his parents, we are so proud of the loving husband and father he became, the career he built and the many loyal friends he made over the years. There's nothing more special to be able to say of a grown child than that they had become one of your best friends! Kevin was a devoted son and friend, and we will miss him terribly!!
As a brother, Kevin was always there for me. He was everything a big brother should be: my childhood idol, my protector, my friend, and always a comic relief. I will miss his big smile and boisterous laugh! We have so many great memories together from our childhood that I will cherish forever. And what truly made my heart melt, was how he loved my children. Dylan and Andrew adored him for his big bear hugs and his playful spirit!
As a husband, Kevin was all a girl could ask for. Having been so fortunate to be Kevin’s wife, I’m often reminded of one of my father’s earliest words of advice. He always told me the most important decision I would ever make in my life would be the man I chose to marry. He said that one decision would have the greatest impact on my happiness and fulfillment of life. Having lived through this past week and knowing the profound loss I’m feeling, I could not agree more with his words. I think of the wonderful man Kevin was, the devoted father he was to my two girls, and the amazing 16 years he provided for my happiness. He never had a harsh word to say and spent all those many years creating such a loving and nurturing environment for us to raise our beautiful family. I’ll always wish I had more time with him to make sure he knew just how much he was truly loved and appreciated.
Most of all, Kevin was a loving and devoted father to both Sydney and Kate. They were his pride and joy and made him laugh and smile like no other people could do. He was always concerned for their well-being and at all times had their best interests in mind. He taught them to be honest, to have a strong work ethic, to have fun at what you do, to not sweat the little things, to read for the love of reading, to take care of each other and to laugh as often as you can. Kevin’s gentle, kind, and sensitive soul has been passed on to both of his girls. While the physical presence of their father may no longer be here, they can take comfort in knowing that they each will always have the best qualities of him and will be his greatest legacy. He loved his girls with all of his heart and would wish for nothing but their lives to be filled with pure happiness and great fulfillment.
That was Kevin.
There’s an ancient Chinese proverb that says, “If your vision is for a year, plant wheat. If your vision is for a decade, plant trees. But, if your vision is for a lifetime, plant people.”
Kevin had a vision for a lifetime. And we would all be hard pressed to find a better example of a man who poured his life into loving people and leaving a legacy of love that will forever impact generations after him.
Kevin Vroome, indeed, was a wonderful gift from our Heavenly Father.
A second gift God offers today is the gift of comfort.
And in moments like this, it’s a gift we all need.
In the Scriptures, the question of why there is suffering and why there is loss isn’t addressed all that often, but there are countless promises of what God is doing and will do about suffering.
In Isaiah 41 God says, “I will strengthen you, surely I will help you. Surely I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
God never says that our lives will be free from trouble and pain, but He does say He will be with us when it comes—to strengthen us and comfort us.
The Scriptures say in 2 Corinthians.
2Cor. 1:3 ¶ Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort,
2Cor. 1:4 who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.
And so my hope is that you’ll embrace today that one of the primary ways God comforts us is through the tangible love and presence of other people. So I want to encourage you today to lean on each other and care for one another. Hug one another. Sit with one another. Grieve together. Listen to one another. Eat together. Share stories and memories together that make you laugh, that leave you inspired, that honor Kevin’s life and memory well. And in doing so, may you allow God to use you to comfort one another and be the visible expression of His love and compassion.
Lastly, this morning, I believe God wants us to know that there’s another gift He offers us—that’s the very gift of life itself through Jesus Christ.
That it’s because of Christ—that we can have hope in the midst of grief. It’s because of Christ that we don’t have to fear what’s on the other side of death. And while we may not understand all the details of what that looks like…
What Christ invites us to trust is that death doesn’t have the last word. Kevin believed that. That his story would continue.
And yet still, it’s okay for us to grieve here today. There’s so much we don’t understand. Questions of WHY? Questions of HOW? And then even more questions of WHY? And most likely, those are all questions we’ll never know the answer to.
And so rather than let those questions consume us, I think we’re invited to trust a couple things about God’s heart.
That one, God isn’t selfish. God didn’t choose to cause great pain to us so that he could have Kevin for himself. That would go against the core of everything we know and understand about Jesus. Jesus put flesh on God’s heart for all of us to see and understand what God is actually like, and what we discover throughout the life and teachings of Jesus is that Jesus always leveraged his power and authority to serve the benefit of others, not for his own selfish gain. Not for his own benefit.
That was the same heart of God Kevin sought to know and that we’re invited to do as well.
A second thing I think is important to understand is that God is not absent or unconcerned or somehow apathetic about the hurt we all feel and have felt.
Death always grieves God’s heart. In fact, When Jesus’ good friend Lazarus died in the Scriptures, it says one of the most comforting statements in all the Bible. Where It says upon hearing the news, “Jesus wept.”
And so understand, it’s okay to grieve.
Jesus did. Even though he knew that his friend would be resurrected soon after…he still wept. He still grieved. So, understand, it’s okay.
So in this season of grief and mourning, may we all find ourselves running toward our Heavenly Father, trusting his heart, not running away from Him.
Trusting that He understands, that none of our questions or anger threatens God—that God is big enough to handle it, and that He grieves with you and desires to comfort you and carry you through toward life.
Someone once said, “Let us live as people who are prepared to die, and die as people prepared to live.”
So my hope for all of us is, that we would honor Kevin by preparing to live. That we can hurt. We can admit the whole situation feels wrong. We can acknowledge that our lives are sadder today and that life is more complicated and confusing than it was last weekend. But, in the midst of that…we would also find ways to choose to love today. That we would not allow the wrongness of his death to erase the rightness of his life. That we would find ways to celebrate his life everyday, rather than only mourn the loss of his presence with us.
Our Heavenly Father gives us life, He gives us comfort, and He gave us Kevin, and may we all find ourselves forever grateful that He did.
As we prepare to conclude the service, Stephen is going to play one more song that expresses Kevin’s heart to us today.
Before he does though, one of the things Kevin, Alison, and his girls did recently was watch the movie, the Hobbit, together.
And yesterday I was thinking about that movie, and reflecting on the timeliness of your family sharing that together…and I remembered the scene when Gandalf first shares the quest ahead of him with Bilbo Baggins. Bilbo starts reading through the details of what lies ahead for him and suddenly he faints at the thought of how scary it would be, how difficult it would be. Thinking there was no way he could handle it.
And yet what we find throughout the movie is that Bilbo finds himself overcoming all sorts of challenges and difficulties. And we quickly start to discover that there is much more to this little hobbit than meets the eye.
But even more than that, Bilbo starts to realize that he possesses these hidden reserves of inner strength and courage that even Bilbo himself didn’t imagine he had when he first set out on the quest.
And so, as many of us find ourselves in this moment, unable to imagine what life looks like tomorrow, or next week, or in the months, or years ahead, may each of us discover an inner strength and perseverance we didn’t know we had to help with the challenging journey ahead.
And may we lean on God and one another to get us through.
_______________________________________________________
DAVE BUTTS - FRATERNITY BROTHER AND FRIEND
I’m Dave (Butts) and this is Joel (Harrel). Some of you may not know who we are. We both have known Kevin for over 23 years, met Kevin while at NC State where we were fraternity brothers and more importantly became lifelong friends. We have been roommates, we stayed at his parent’s house when they lived in Charlotte, we were groomsmen in his wedding, and our families have vacationed together over the years.
There are 3 points I want to share about Kevin here today:
1. He was not liked
2. He had more than just one family
3. Kevin is not gone he is still here with us today
Number 1: Kevin was not liked he was loved by everyone he met and whose life he touched. It was obvious of the love people had for Kevin by the tons of emails, Facebook posts, calls, and conversations I have had this week…which leads me to
Number 2: Kevin had more than just one family. You all being here today puts you into one or more of these families. He of course has his immediate family, but he also had other families like his work family, his neighborhood family, his college fraternity brother family, his childhood friend family, and his church family.
Last point: Kevin is not gone, he is still here with us….because he will always be in our Memories, he will be in our Heart and he will be here in Spirit.
To prove that point of Kevin being here with us:
Tuesday night after Joel and I visited with Alison and Kevin’s parents I go to my car and begin to drive off….As I drive away from their house I notice my radio is turned off…That’s weird since I was listening to Sat. radio when I arrived at their house and had not turned the radio off……I turn the radio on and it is tuned to some random AM station full of static with the volume turned up….I uncontrollably started laughing and felt a since of wellbeing…..It was the first time I had really laughed and felt that way in two days….
I tell you all that because 30 minutes earlier at Kevin and Alison’s house, we were all sharing various stories about Kevin and one story came up about his choice and like of terrible/cheesy music.
I told the story of why we always picked on him about being a huge Journey fan. You see back in college Kevin drove a maroon Toyota Celica (some on you remember the one with the louvers or Venetian blinds in the back). Well at some point a Journey tape had gotten stuck in his cassette player and he could not get it out.
Now at our old Fraternity house our parking lot was small and we had cars always stacked on one another…so people would leave their keys so not to block anyone in….Whenever someone had to move Kevin’s car that journey tape was always playing and usually playing pretty loud. No one knew the tape was stuck they just assumed Kevin was the world’s largest Journey fan….
After sharing that story with Alison and Kevin’s parents Tuesday, I left to the surprise Kevin had left me by messing with my radio…..So yes Kevin is still with us!
______________________________________________________
JOEL HARRELL - FRATERNITY BROTHER AND FRIEND
... and I would have to disagree with Dave on one poiint ... the point that Kevin was a CLOSET Journey fam ... because the other night when we were visiting with Alison and the Vroome family, she actually pulled out his workout playlist - I want to say it was his workout playlist because it makes it funnier - but we actually found Journey's "Don't Stop Believing" on his WORKOUT PLAYLIST. Working out to Journey - awesome.
So what I wanted to focus on today is something that hit me and I thought of earlier this week. During one of my many breakdowns I started laughing at the end because I pictured Kevin looking down at me laughing, "Suck it up you wuss!" I thought at that point I was moving into the Acceptance phase, and I started thinking more clearly around "What would Kevin want us to glean from all this?"
Now usually the words "tragedy" and "inspiration" are complete opposites, and we will come back to this in a minute. As a quick background, our group of friends from State is a large family. We have a group of 30-40 guys where we have all hung out and known each other for 20 or more years. Just so happens that we have an annual guys trip that the planning started less than two weeks ago. There is a large email group of these 40 guys and wwhen Alison told me the terrible news and asked me to get the word out, I wanted to notify as many as possible and as quickly as possible. So I changed the subject line on this email as to give a brief heads up for the bad news, and I sent the small amount of detail I had out to the group. Now this week has been an emotional blur, but I can tell you that without prompting or any script, replies started pouring in mentioning what a great guy Kevin was - all the outstanding qualities we should all aspire to emulate in our lives. Now back to words: "tragedy" and "inspiration".
When I asked what Kevin would want us to glean from this ... I thought "From Tragedy comes Inspiration." I know for a fact that our entire large group of brothers, friends and family have done some serious reflection this week. Whether it be about family, health, work life balance, or living life to the fullest, every person that this event has touched has been inspired to not take life for granted. I encourage all of you - if there's a friend that lives a little farther away, or a friend or loved one you have been meaning to reach out to, but haven't for whatever reasons - do it. Go see them. Hug your friends, hug your loved ones. Be Inspired to live life to the fullest! I know that Kevin would take a lot of pride in knowing how he was AND IS an Inspiration to all of us. Thank you.
___________________________________________________
JOE ROBERTS OF TELEFLEX
Alison, Sydney, Kate, family members, friends and colleagues, it’s an honor for me to represent our colleagues at Teleflex.
We knew Kevin since 2010 when he joined Teleflex as a Project Manager. I was fortunate enough to be one of the interviewers and was immediately impacted by just meeting Kevin. Kevin was sincere. He had a gentle soul about him and was very practical, although we later learned that this did not apply to buying cars. An impeccable work ethic, he had utmost integrity and most of all a burning desire to help others. I have had the privilege of being Kevin’s mentor for the past year and often found myself, and still do, as the one being pushed. I mean, he knows how much we both love public speaking! He contributed so much in the development of every person he worked with so that they could be a part of the company as a whole. In Kevin’s career he had the passion to lead diverse teams of people to effect change. He could motivate you, he could inspire you, he could influence you and he would make sure you were successful. He was the type of guy who always made you smile. He found ways to make a mundane meeting fun and always made work a better place. Kevin was living proof of how fine a person could be. He was a good leader of the people in his charge, a loving husband and a devoted father to his children. He was also a good friend to many of us and a great colleague. The character and the life that he lived might be summed up in a few words. He made us all better people.
KEVIN KIERNAN - BROTHER OF FRATERNITY BROTHER, RICK (Facebook Message)
As has been the case with several of you, I’ve been operating in a disjointed fashion- at a rare loss for words and comprehension since early Monday morning.
This past Saturday, I drove home from Raleigh in the vehicle I’ve had my eyes set on since I was in high school - in the highest of possible of spirits. I was able to do so because I have the privilege of being co-owner of a burgeoning and successful law firm covering southeastern North Carolina, where we now employ nine other people. Add to that my wonderful and supportive family and friends, and I recognize I am finally fulfilling my dreams and my potential. That hasn’t always been the case, but there is one of many among several who had a fairly good sized role in those developments, whether he knew it or not ...
In October 2000, at the age of 26, I returned to Raleigh in a poor state of mind, health and finances - broke, unemployed and out of school. My parents welcomed me back into their home to get back on my feet. My brother Rick put his own reputation on the line to put me in touch with Jim Sanders to convince him to give me a chance to work in the software development field while I completed some academic matters to be able to return to my undergraduate studies. Jim hired me to work at Cisys, where I continued to work even after completing law school. Now, each of those folks took a chance on me for which I will be forever grateful, but there was one person in particular who really cemented my return to the personal confidence I always used to have in my own innate abilities. That person was Kevin Vroome.
Kevin was one of my brother’s fraternity brothers, and having hung out several times in the past with those guys, I had surely met him before, but didn’t really know him. He was my immediate boss at Cisys, and became not only my project manager, but my mentor in almost every way, as well as a trusted friend. I’m arrogant and I’m confident in almost any area but I was starting over, had never done software development in a professional setting and I was nervous as hell. But Kevin treated me in such a way that if he was ever nervous as to whether I would hack it, you would never have known it; at least he never let me know it.
He was the first person not obligated to do so (family, etc.), who made it clear that he had faith in my abilities and he knew I would do whatever he assigned to me, and he did not hesitate to add to those assignments ... When it came time for new methods or novel additions that clients wanted, Kevin would simply tell me, “You’ll figure it out. Trust yourself man; I have faith in you.” And, by skill or by luck, by hell or high water, by trial and error, and by brainstorming with coworkers, I would invariably figure it out.
But it didn’t end there. Kevin taught me about time management and appreciation of family and so many things that I can’t fully describe even now. We would discuss authors, sports and even general theories. We would bring books to work to read during lunch. Kevin’s habits taught me it was ok to bring your lunch from home - you don’t have to eat with the guys every day, even if they give you grief occasionally. And I’ve truly learned now that I’m married with a family of my own, just what a special feeling it is to enjoy that specially packed lunch - to have a part of my family with me while I take a break during the day.
Kevin helped me to learn how to budget time, not only at work, but in general. To such an extent, that from 2002-2004, I was working full time, attending NC State full time, playing organized soccer three times a week and volunteering with the SPCA on a least one Saturday a month - and still had time for family and friends, and loved every minute of it. He even urged me to pursue law school when I was still up in the air and unsure about where I would be accepted. There was truly no one better that could have been placed in my life, at that very time, in that very capacity, to get me back on the proper path of my life than Kevin. The only regret that I have about any of that, is not staying in better contact with him once I moved to the coast and began my legal career. We spoke occasionally, but the times became less and less frequent, and I feel like a heel for not remembering the last time that we spoke or hung out.
Because we lost Kevin Sunday night. He was only a year older than me, and was taken entirely too young for him, for his family, for his friends, and for this world - for all that he did by simply being himself that made this world that much better every day that he lived within it. I know I can honestly say that I wouldn’t be the man I am today were it not in some fair part for Kevin Vroome. He pushed me to meet my potential; he was a great mentor; he was a concerned friend when I needed one; he simply acted in a way that made each of us want to be a little more - more kind, more thoughtful, more understanding, more appreciative of family. He was indeed a tremendous man - friend, husband, father, son and brother. We each are richer for having known him and the world is a little emptier for having lost him.
Thank you for having such a positive impact on this world my friend, and on my life in particular. You are truly one of God’s good ones and I will forever treasure being your friend. May you rest in peace, Kevin, and may your legacy continue to bring healing and comfort to your family, loved ones and friends.
____________________________________
RICK KIERNAN , Kevin Kiernan’s brother responded on Facebook
Thanks for posting this Kevin. I know Alison will really appreciate it.
Man, this brings back so many memories! I remember being one of the guys giving Kevin grief about not joining us for lunch. Haha - we’d even offer to go to Chick-fil-A because he loved that place so much! Kevin and I spoke of you last New Year’s Eve at Joel’s. Believe me when I say the feelings you shared were mutual. He really enjoyed those years working with you, and he was really happy to hear that you and your family are doing so well. He was such a special guy. I miss him already.
____________________________________________
KEITH BENSON, cousin responding to the above on Facebook
Well said. I think this shows the impact that Kevin had on everyone when a distant friend or someone that hasn’t been in contact recently takes the time to write a wonderful tribute to a man that was always there for family and friends and had an interest in peoples’s lives.
* * * * * * * * *
SHARE OBITUARY
v.1.8.18