Hello Baby Girl, Thanksgiving came and went, Christmas is over, and a New Year is beginning.  What can I say, accept I miss you!  To say it is getting easier would be a lie.  I think about you everyday.  I look at your picture and see your beautiful smile and tell myself you are going to make it through, and I do, but it is hard trying to do the things I use to.

I just wanted to let you know you are still with me and I miss you very much.  I went out to your grave Christmas Eve with your Dad to put flowers on your grave and to put twinkling lights out.  How you loved to sit and watch the lights on the Christmas tree.  

I just wanted to stop by and say Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.  Miss you, but most of all I love you.  Love Mom

Well Baby Girl: Three years have gone by and I am doing my best to hold it together. I miss you so much. Your smile can still light up a room and my heart. Just know that I love and miss you deeply. Love Mom

Hello Baby Girl - Today is Mother's Day and the last time you hugged me and told me you loved me. I was on my way downstairs and you were on your way upstairs.  You had that smile on your face and the twinkle in your eyes. How I miss you!

I am doing my best to move on, but there are days I am so angry and then there are days I just cry.  Your brothers are doing fine and your Dad, well you know "quiet soul."

I do not want to make this a sad day, but you are missed.  I looked at your picture and I think, oh my what a beautiful girl and I had the pleasure of being your Mother.  I love you and miss you something awful.  Much Love, Mom.

Well Baby Girl, I made it through your favorite holiday.  Although, it was not without tears.  You cannot imagine how much you are missed.  As I was buying the candy, all I could think about is how you would go with me to Sam's Club and help select the candy and at the very last minute you would put two big boxes of pixies sticks in the cart and smile.  Well, guess what?  I picked up those pixies sticks and gave them out, yes I put some aside in memory of you.

Tiffanie-Ann, why did you go?  Every time I think I am getting better, the holidays come and the pain and hurt start.  I pray for peace, but there is none.  The only peace I do have is that you are at peace.  I visit you and replace your flowers, but now I just sit and remember.  You know your Dad does not show his emotions, but I see the longing and hurt on his face.  You were his "little girl" and he loved you, oh how he loved you.

Need to brace myself for the upcoming holidays, Thanksgiving and Christmas.  Just when I get over the anniversary of you being gone, and the birthday, then the holidays come rushing in.  

Just know you are truly missed and loved.  Love Your Mom!

Hello Baby Girl!  Happy Birthday!  Today you would have been 23 years old and now I wonder what you would have been like.  Tiffanie-Ann, as I sit here writing this message to you the tears are beginning to roll down my face.  Little Girl, I know you are at peace, but the pain you left behind cannot be explained.  No, Mom is not mad, but hurt you decide to leave so soon.

You, Christopher, and Mychal have been my blessings and my hope is that you will know how much you are loved.  The memories bring smiles to my face, yet the pain of you being gone still lingers.  I am doing my best to move on and not be sad, but there are days when the anger and pain are so heavy that all I can do to get through is to cry.  Enough of the sadness!

Went to a concert last night to see the Chi-lites, Manhattans, Floaters and several other groups.  Yes, I enjoyed myself.  Let Grandpa Gilliam know that the Manhattans did his favorite song "Kiss and Say Good-Bye."  Every time I hear that song, I smile.  I bring this up, because you had your music, but when I would walk by your room, I would hear you playing these songs and I would smile because you would always say my music was old.

To celebrate you to day, I am going to make your favorite cookies, go to Pappadeaux Seafood Kitchen and talk about the crazy times you kids put your Dad and I through.  As soon as I finish baking your cookies, I will come and sit with you a while and enjoy your company.  I hope you enjoy the roses I put out.

Tiffanie-Ann, know that I understand you were in pain, but I have always been here for you kids.  What you fail to realize is that you were loved and the love that was in this house was real.  Your Dad and I, have done the best we know to raise you kids and I wonder "what went wrong."  Know I am at peace, because you are with God, but my selfish flesh would rather have you here.

Once again, Happy Birthday, Baby Girl and I will do my best not to cry all day long.  

Much Love Always,  Mom

If I could visit Heaven, 
Even for a day,
Maybe for a moment, 
The pain would go away.

I'd put my arms around you, 
And whisper words so true,
That living life without you,
Is the hardest thing to do.

No matter how we spend our days,
No matter what we do,
No morning dawns or evening falls,
When we don't think of you.

Happy Fourth of July, Baby Girl!  You were definitely missed today.  I thought about the time you were just 2 years old and had two bottom teeth, I gave you a rib, and how you cleaned that bone.  I miss how your face light up with all the fire works and how you loved to sit and watch TV all day with your Dad and Mychal.  Tiffanie-Ann all I have is memories and that will never be enough.  I wish you were here, because this pain I have seems to grow deeper each day.  Know you are missed very much!  Much Love Always, Mom

Hello Baby Girl - I made it through Christmas, barely.  I know you were watching and saw how Christmas has changed in this family.  Just knowing I will not be able to wrap another gift or write you name on a card is hard.  I sent out cards, but I did not send Christmas update letter.  I came out to see you and bought your Christmas decorations and as usual I could not stop the tears from falling.  The worse part was I did not want to leave.  I put your stocking up and realized you left your Pez dispenser and Christmas reef candy cane inside from the last Christmas you were here.  I did every thing I could not to cry, but I did not win the battle.  I did manage to play Christmas music this year and cooking kept me occupied.  Everyone enjoyed themselves, but you can see the pain and hurt on your Dad, Christopher, and Mychal faces.  Tiffanie-Ann, this is so hard knowing you are not here to celebrate the holidays.  Let me stop, because I cannot see pass my tears and my heart is hurting.  Know you are missed and most of all you are loved.  Love Mom

Hello Baby Girl -  It's been 18 months since you passed and I am still getting by day-to-day.  Thanksgiving is coming up and I just do not like seeing that empty chair where you sat.  I am still trying not to cry, but on days like today it's hard.

I passed my first class and my second class ends December 13th. I want to forget the holidays, but I still have much to be thankful for and Christmas is what I enjoyed the most with you kids.  I want you here Tiffanie-Ann - that's all I want.  The tears are starting to flow, so let me just say I miss you and I love you. Mom

Well Baby Girl, another birthday is here and you are not.  Just when I think I can get through another day of the pain and hurt, the tears start to flow and I can't get them to stop.  Oh, how I miss you!  I am on my way upstairs to make your favorite cookies to celebrate your 22nd birthday.  No waffles with mint chocolate chip ice cream or going to the mall to let you pick out what you wanted on your day.  Tiffanie-Ann, how do I ease my pain and hurt?  I know you are at peace and I am grateful for that, but my heart wants you here.  I found a picture of you when you were in the 1st grade and Christopher was in the 3rd grade.  The funny part about that picture is you had the same smile then as you did in your senior pictures.  That beautiful smile with your eyes twinkling.  Its times like these I wish I could just sleep through the day.  I know you want me to celebrate with joy and I will, but let me get through the pain and hurt first.  I will find a way to smile and enjoy your birthday, because when I had you it was a glorious and happy day and I won't/can't allow my pain and hurt to take that joy away.  So, as I celebrate you today, I will visit you, put fresh roses out for you along with balloons, and I will sit with you for a while.  

You might find this funny; your brother Mychal wants to honor you today by getting a tattoo and guess what – Mom is allowing him to do it.  

This is the only time I will approve of a tattoo.  I just could not say no, because he needs to heal and this is way of doing it by carrying you everywhere he goes throughout his life.  Mychal does not say much in regards to you, but I know he thinks about you a lot and misses you as well.  You know Christopher, he's like you Dad – doesn't like to show emotions, but I know he misses you as well.  

Well, Baby Girl, let me close for now and remember – IT'S NOT GOODBYE, BUT SEE YOU LATER.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!  MUCH LOVE ALWAYS, MOM

Hello Baby Girl - Well, today is the 4th of July, your favorite holiday.  I came out today and put fresh flower on your grave and sat with you awhile.  It was so peaceful out there today and all I could think about was your smiling face.  We smoke some steaks, I made cole slaw and corn on the cob.  It still does not feel right without you sitting at the table.  You must know how much you are missed.  It not so much sadness as there is pain and hurt that consumes me, but I am getting to the point to where the tears are not as heavy.  We went and watched the fireworks, but it was not the same.  I enjoyed watching your face and the smile and amazement you had.  There are days I still want to scream, because I miss you so.  

I know you are at peace and that gives me some comfort, but I wish you were here.  Just to hug you,to see your smile, or to hear you in your room playing your music is what I miss.  Your room is still the way you left it and I know I will have to go in there soon, but every time I go to the door my heart breaks; so I leave and tell myself soon.

Mom turned another year older and I didn't do much.  Went to the movies, came home ate dinner and went to bed.  I can hear you singing "happy birthday, old lady" and laughing as you were singing.  The memories I have is what keeps me from crying at times.  Yes, I came out to visit you.  Would not be right now to spend part of the day with you.

Happy 4th of July and know you are always in my heart and that you are missed, but never forgotten.  Love Mom

Hello Baby Girl -  I waited until the end of the month to write.

On May 23rd, we celebrated you being gone by going to the movies to see "Iron Man 3" which you would have enjoyed.  Yes, I went!  Afterwards we went to dinner at Papadeaux and we talked about you and all the crazy things you would do.  We laughed and you know I had to fight the tears back.  We ended the day by visiting you and Monique came out with her sister and that's when I lost it.  Tiffanie-Ann she cried to hard and I didn't have the words to comfort her, so I went and sat in the car.

On May 31st, the day I laid you to rest, I didn't do much.  The feeling of numbness and shock is still with me.  I know you are at peace, but Lord knows I wish you were here.  Tiffanie-Ann, it's the pain and hurt that stays with me daily, but the tears are subsiding.  When I look at your picture the tears come, when I watch a movie that you and I have watched, the tears comes, or when I look at the closed door to your room, the tears comes.  Not to worry, I am slowly moving forward.  Not sure where too (smile), but moving forward.

Your Dad and Brothers are coping, but Mychal is still missing you something awful.  I watched him at your grave site and he still have the pain and hurt on his face.  That is not to say your Dad and Christopher is not carrying the pain and hurt as well; they just hide it more.

Well, I will close for now.  Just wanted you to know how missed and loved you are and that you are always with us.  It's not good-bye, but see you later.  Love Mom

YOU NEVER KNOW HOW STRONG YOU ARE UNTIL BEING STRONG IS THE ONLY CHOICE YOU HAVE!

Hello Tiffanie-Ann -  I know I haven't written in a while, but you are always on my heart.  Today is Mother's Day, my last holiday with you.  I sat with you today and I still cannot believe you are not here.  I do my best to take each day to move on and thankful I can.  You are missed and I find it difficult at times to get through the day, but I am trying.  I love you and I miss you.  Love Mom

Hello Baby Girl!  I just came from seeing you because you were heavy on my heart.  I was there yesterday taking down your Christmas decoration. I put fresh roses out for you and guess what, it's snowing, but that's okay.

Today is Amalie's Birthday.  The two of you would be planning events for tonight.  I have to say, out of all your friends, she was the most honest with you and a true friend.  If she knew you were in trouble that day, she would have been there for you.  She feels guilty she wasn't, but I assured her she need not feel guilty plus you would not want her to feel that way.  She comes by every now and then to let me know she is doing fine.  She is back in school and I am glad for her.

Baby Girl, I miss you so much.  With each passing day I pray you are at peace and happy with God.  That's what I pray now for you.  The tears will come and go, as well as the hurt and pain, but you are always on my mind and forever in my heart.  I just needed you to know that today.

As always, I miss you and Love you.  Love Mom

Hello Tiffanie-Ann, I thought last month was hard, but I have to tell you this is the worse.  I have been trying to stay busy baking and doing the things I did when you were here.  It's not helping!

I managed to finish my first year of law school - took finals on 12/7/12.  Won't find out anything until I start my second year.  This is the good news.

We bought the Christmas tree last Sunday and I know you were with us.  You always wanted to get the biggest tree on the lot and this year guess what - we did.  I know you were laughing watching your Dad, Christopher, and Mychal bringing it in the house. We have had the tree a week and we are just now decorating it.  Your Dad and Mychal decorated the tree while I was in church.  The tree is beautiful, but it does not have that Tiffanie-Ann touch. 

I have spent the last 2 days trying to wrap presents and it is so hard.  Dad, Christopher, Mychal, and Mom are the names I write and I get angry because your name will not appear on any of the presents.

We bought you a tree and wreath along with roses and that took everything I had to not break down.  What makes this even worse is - this is the 7th month you been gone and I am still asking God to bring you back.  This is getting harder and the pain deepens.

Baby Girl, your Dad doesn't say much, but he is not handling this holiday very well.  I have notice the closer it gets to Christmas the more he is becoming withdrawn.  You know me, I have to get him to think or do something to keep him from thinking or hard.  This is hard when I am feeling the same way.  Your brothers are just trying to not think.  

Well, I have to close for now and try to wrap some more presents.  I just could not let this day go by without saying "hello."  I miss you and I love you.  Love Mom

Well, Baby Girl, I know it's been a while since I written, but I was not going to let this day go by without letting you know how much you were missed.

I made it through Thanksgiving and I am truly thankful for having you as my daughter.  You were missed tremendously by the family.  To say this was easy does not begin to tell the pain and hurt I felt sitting at the table and looking at your empty chair.  There was a point where I lost my breath and my heart was heavy, but I am truly grateful for having you as my daughter and even though you were not here, you were definitely not forgotten.

Your Dad put up a good front, which is to say he enjoyed the dinner, but you could see the sadness in his face.  Your brothers, they did their best not to show their pain and hurt.

Well, Baby Girl, Mom is still struggling with you not being here.  Each day God bless me to see another day and I am thankful.  God knows my pain and hurt and He has been my source of strength.  Tomorrow you will be gone six months and it still feels like yesterday.  Know I miss you more than I can say or have words to express, but I know God has made the decision to bring you home - that's how much He loves you.  So, on this Thanksgiving day, know I love you and miss you more than anything.

Happy Thanksgiving.  Love Mom

Hello, Baby Girl, we and bought Halloween candy yesterday and it took everything I had to hold it together.  You know the little kid next door came over and wanted to know if "Cousin It" will be out on Halloween.  I smiled and said "no."  He wanted to know who was going to exchange his miniatures candy for the big candy bars?  I just told him to come by the house.

This year I won't make the vanilla ice cream that you always requested so you can put those miniatures candies in or the junior mints.  Every year, "Mom, you make vanilla ice cream."  I couldn't buy it, it had to be the non-diary Mom made.   What am I going to do Tiffanie-Ann?

I know you thought I didn't know about the exchanging of candy.  You would always take a pillow case of candy out and pick out little kids along the way, the parents would come by the house and thank us.  I will never forget the first year you did that and all those thanks from parents.  Your Dad and I would just say "Cousin It."  I am glad you had a big heart.  I miss you and Love you.  Mom

Hello Tiffanie-Ann, I have been trying to move on and I have to tell you I don't know how.  Each day I am thankful, but the pain is even deeper now.  I miss you and it hurts; the tears fall daily and sometimes I don't realize they are falling.

I keep asking myself if this will ever get easier or will there come a time I will think of you and just smile.  I look at your picture and I can't believe that is all that is left.  I visit your grave now on Sundays only now and I sit there just looking at the picture on your Marker.

I thank God for allowing me to be your Mother for the twenty years you were here on this earth.  You were my joy as your brothers are.  Baby Girl, I cannot begin to tell you how much love I have for you.  I still want to scream at the thought of you being gone.  I want you to be at peace and know that my heart will ache for you for the rest of my days.  I miss you and love.  Just know you were loved by many, but most of all you were loved by your family the most.  Mom

Baby Girl, it's been four months and it seems like yesterday when my world took a turn for the worse. I lost part of my joy that day.

I was in the kitchen cooking me something to eat, when I look over at the end of counter and all I could see is you standing there making chocolate milk.  I had to turn the stove off and go lay down.  If I didn't have to take Mychal to school, I would have laid there all day.

Little Girl, I want you to be a peace and I want you to know I will be okay, but know you will forever be in my heart.  Visiting your grave is still a bad dream and so unreal to me.

One of your friends came by who heard you were gone and wanted to know if it was true.  Tiffanie-Ann, that girl cried so hard that I had to do everything I could to hold it together.  You touched a lot of people and it is amazing how special you really were.  She finally pulled herself together and she asked if I would take her to your resting place.  Tiffanie-Ann, you would have thought this girl was related to you in some way.  She just fell apart at the sight of your Marker and called you name over and over.  I don't know how long she stayed, but I had to leave.  It was just to painful to watch that girl fall apart like that.

Christopher is in Austin, TX this week and you know I miss him.  He called to let me know he's okay and can't wait to come home.  Texas is to hot and humid for him.  Of course, none of you kids do well in heat.  Mychal is doing better and is focusing on school.  I am still struggling to get through law school, but I am getting there.  I am going to complete this journey, so you help me to keep going.

Your Guest Book and your grave are the only two places I go to talk to you and I am so thankful.  I miss you and I love you, Mom!

Hello Baby Girl - Yesterday was Mychal's birthday and we did not do much.  Made him a "Fudge Marble" cake and went to dinner at Pappadeaux Seafood Kitchen.  As we were being lead to our table, the funniest thing happened.  We had reservation for 5 (Christopher's girlfriend came along) and when we arrived at the table there was 6 table settings and Mychal instantly said "I knew Tiffanie-Ann would come."  I did every thing I could not to cry.  Dinner was good and we had a good time.

I visited you today and changed your flowers and sat with you for a long time.  Did not have much to say, but you were running through my thoughts.  I played Mahalia Jackson "Without God, I Could do Nothing" and I have to say it is so true.  Tiffanie-Ann, without God I would not have made it through this and He's been carrying me every since.  

I just wanted to thank you for making Mychal's birthday dinner and know that he really appreciated you being there.  In fact, out of all the cards and gifts that was the best one of all, even for me.  I love you and miss you.  Love Mom

Hello Tiffanie-Ann, your Dad's birthday was Monday and the sadness on his face was clear of him missing you.  He tries to be uplifting, but you just don't know how much he misses you.  We didn't do much, as you know he takes all of our birthdays off, but he never takes his; which means he went to work.  

Went to the Garden of the Gods Saturday and it was beautiful.  Mychal even climbed up one of the rocks in memory of you.  I took a picture, because I knew you would not believe he did it.  I made lumpia for your Dad, but he did not want the cake.  Did not want us to sing the "Happy Birthday" song, because you would not be singing "Happy Birthday Pickle Butt."

How am I doing? Well, I am still numb and in disbelief.  All I do is think about you, or wait for you to call, or wish you would come running down those stairs.  When I visit you now I just sit in silence.  I remember when you would come down to the basement and sit on the couch, would not say anything, just sit and watch me do homework.  When I look over at you, you have this look on your face and I knew you just needed to be near Mom.  So, I would stop and come sit with you and you would say "wanna watch a movie."  I don't know why, but those time were so special to me.  No words needed, just the comforts of a blanket and a movie.  You know it's hard for me to watch TV these days.  I watched the DNC and even that made me sad.  Seeing the President and his daughters only made me think of you.

Just know I think of you daily and I do my best to move on, but I know you are missing and it makes move on trying.  I'm getting there, but to be honest; I will never be the same and that is something I will have to deal with.

Know I love you and miss you.  It still takes my breath away when I realize you are not coming back. Love you, Mom

As i was reading your writing to your baby girl, I was moved to write to you and pray for you.  i pray that god will comfort and take your hurt and pain away.  I never have loss a child and don't know your pain and hurt that you are feeling.  I do know a God that can heal every pain and can dry away all your tears and replace them with tears of joy.  There is no hurt or saddness that God cannot heal.   If you would just ask him to comfort and heal you and more yet if you would ask him to come into your life and live for him and he will.  He's just type kind of God that can heal any kind of pain.  Try him and you will love the results.  Your little girl would not have want you to continue being sad, she would want you to be happy and glad.  God can do that and more.  He will give you joy in your storm and turn your tears into tears of joy.

Hello Baby Girl -  I was sitting by your grave yesterday, when a lady who was visiting her love one came over and gave me this prayer.  Know I am trying to deal best I can.

Prayer For Emotional Healing

Loving Father,

I come before You with faith in Your promise that whatever I ask for in Your name You will grant to me if it is the good of my soul in accordance with Your Divine Will.
I come trusting in Your great love for me and believing that only You know what is best for me.  I come to You now to ask that you enter my heart and heal all my wounded emotions.
You know me better than I know myself.  Bring your healing love into every corner of my heart and release all the buried negative emotions inside that have not been resolved and continue to cause me anguish.
Remove all my unhealed hurts and painful memories that block the flow of Your graces, robbing me of Your peace, love and joy.  Heal all feelings and sadness, loneliness, fear and anxiety.
Heal all guilt, despair, feelings and betrayal and rejection.  Heal all feelings and anger, hatred, resentment and bitterness.
Bring your healing love to all my emotions that have caused me feelings of hopelessness, discouragement, helplessness and despair.  Grant me the grace to forgive all those who caused negative emotions and likewise to be forgiven by those to whom I have done the same harm.
O, Lord, give me a repentant heart, forgive me for my sins and failures, and be merciful to me.  Help me to realize the blessings that resulted from each painful experience and how this had led me closer to You.
As You release from me all these painful emotions, fill all the empty spaces with Your love, Your peace, Your joy and the powerful presence of Your Holy Spirit.  After I have been healed, may my life be a witness to Your power and glory and may I reach out to others, too.
All these I pray in Jesus name and all the angels and saints. Amen.

Hello Tiffanie-Ann -  If you were looking down yesterday, you would have seen all those who loved you come out and share their memories of you.  Baby Girl, do you realize how loved you were.  Your friends may not have been the best, but they loved and miss you dearly.  All your friends were true to form.  They did not try and hide who they were and they spoke freely.  Of course, they mentioned you would not have it any other way.  No phonies allowed!

I, on the other hand, spent the day making your favorite cookies.  The people who catered the affair even like them.  I hope I am not being selfish, but all I can think about is how we were to celebrate your 21st, the shopping, eating, and of course your first legal drink (smile).  I did have a glass of wine to honor you.  Your Dad and Brothers hid their feeling, but enjoyed the memories from your friends.

Tiffanie-Ann, you knew a lot of people.  Had the memorial service been at a different time the cemetery would have been packed.  There were so many cars and I did not think it possible to know that many people and some of your friends shared rides.  Girl, you left your heart in each and every one of those friends.  I am glad your Dad and I raised you to have a heart of love.  I just wished you had understood the blessing you had.

Well, Your grave is complete and now I must find a way to accept you not coming back.  Silly me, still thinks you are going to come through the door, stand in the kitchen making chocolate milk, lay on the couch watching TV, or in your room playing your music.  Speaking of music, I am glad you found my music of good taste.  I found Teena Marie, Rick James, The Temptations, The Dramatics to name a few on your ITUNES playlist.  You were your Mother's daughter. 

Happy Birthday my beautiful Tiffanie-Ann.  You know what song came to mind on your birthday - "You are my Sunshine."  I sung that song to each of you when you were born.  You are still my sunshine, sweet Tiffanie-Ann.   Love Mom

Well Baby Girl, this month is flying by so fast.  Eleven more days and your birthday will be here.  I look at your picture and I think "what happened," "why," and "what could I have done."  You left me without warning and even to this day I am numb.  The only thing I know for sure is God has my little girl.

Christopher and Mychal they muddle through each day and your Dad looks so lost.  I cannot begin to know the pain and hurt they feel, but I do know it's deep, because my pain is deep.

Do you realize, everywhere we go there is a reminder of you.  I was driving down Quebec and saw a girl sitting at a bus stop and I instantly recall you calling to be picked up.  I go to the mall and it just does not seem the same.  I have to block my memories when I drive, because you are everywhere; the light rail station, bus stops, even the grocery store.  Mychal and I drove to the Elm Street Market the other day and I remember how you would get excited about going there and getting non-dairy ice cream (Mint Chocolate Chip).  I would tell you this is for me and you would laugh and say "sure" knowing you would be eating the majority of it.  You loved all my non-dairy products.  I remember the first time I made macaroni and cheese with the non-dairy cheese, you ate it as though I never made it before.  The smile on your face was all that was needed to say "um um um good."  Tiffanie-Ann, Tiffanie-Ann what am I suppose do?

I go over in my mind everyday wonder if you knew how much I loved you.  Christopher and Mychal will never be the same.  I had to give them the number to the counseling staff so they can talk to someone.  If you thought no one was going to miss you - you thought wrong Baby Girl.

Nothing will be the same, at least for me it will not.  Birthdays, Thanksgiving, Christmas will always have emptiness.  Just with your birthday coming up is hard.  Tiffanie-Ann, I cry all the time and it hurts so bad.

What makes this difficult is seeing your Marker on a grave, knowing this will be the final step in laying you to rest and you being at peace.  I sit by your grave and I stoke the grass as though I am stroking your head when you would lay on my lap watching TV.

The one thing that is so true is, God gave me three beautiful children that filled my life with joy and happiness.  Who would of thought loving you three kids could bring so much joy, but to loose one could bring so much pain.  Your Mom, will never be the same.

In eleven days I will have to say my final good-bye to you and try and accept you being gone, which will never be easy.   Love Your Mom

Hello Baby Girl, it's August 6, 2012 and each day has been really difficult for me this month and it will not slow down.  This is your birthday month and you would have been 21 years old.  Why, Tiffanie-Ann?  You knew I loved you and would have done anything for you.  Right or wrong Baby Girl, I truly loved you.  I still tell God, I would have given my life to have you live a full life.

My last gift to you will be a "Marker" for your grave and a reception and then all I have is the memories.  No more Mom can you pick me up from Mineral or County Line; can we watch a movie; can we go to the mall; can we go get something to eat; or can we just go somewhere. There are no more "can we." 

How am I suppose to live the rest of my life without you.  This family has a big whole in it. The dinner table is missing a place where you should be; going anywhere seems so wrong and empty.  I try to be okay, but you were a part of this family and I do not know how to be okay.

The tears come, there are days I just do not want to get up, better yet wake up. People act like I'm suppose to be over you being gone and they do not want to hear the pain that is ripping me apart inside; so I stay away. I really don't go anywhere unless I have to.

Baby Girl, I hope you are truly at peace, but I wish you were here.  I look at you picture everyday you smiling and looking so beautiful.  Tiffanie-Ann, you were such a beautiful girl.  Thinking of you in the past tense is so very hard.

Well, let me try and make the best of the rest of this day.  I am screaming inside, I want my little girl back.  One minute I am angry, the next I am numb from the pain, and then there are time I venture of in thoughts of nothing because I really do not want to think anymore.  This will never be easy for me - know that!

Your friend, Megan, miss you very much.  There are times when I visit you, she is there and it hurts me to see her sitting there and all she does is sit there.  We talk and share memories, but it does not help.  It just makes the hurt and pain difficult.

Why didn't you come to me Tiffanie-Ann?  I was here for you!  I would have helped you through the pain.  I would have comfort you and help you to understand the pain and hurt would have been just for the moment.  Mom, was here for you!  You were not a disappointment to me.  You children are my joy and my blessings and I did not take you it for granted.  I took being your Mother as one of the biggest accomplishment in my life.  You just did not know how special each one of you meant to me, from the day you came into this world you became my world.  Now, there's a hole in my heart and I do not know how to mend it.

I miss you and I love you.  Love Mom

Tiffannie-Ann, it's July 23, 2012 and this is the second month you have been gone.  I call your name everyday knowing you will never answer me.  I am finding it harder and harder to sleep these days and when I do sleep its in the wee hours of the morning.

My beautiful Baby Girl, I pray and hope you are at peace.  Love Mom

Hello Baby Girl - I cannot seem to get over you not being here.  Received you Corner report on 7/13/12 and there was nothing new.  You were a healthy girl, but what the Corner could not see or analyze is your broken spirit.  Tiffanie-Ann, I knew you were hurting and in pain, but I still cannot get pass you not coming to me.  I was here!

I try to get through each day without the tears, but I never do and never will.  Yes, when I am around people I put on the happy face, but on the inside I am dying.

I am not looking forward to next month.  Tiffanie-Ann, you would have been Twenty-One.  You and I was going to make it a girls day before you went out with your friends.  Instead I get to place a Marker on your grave as my final gift to you.  

Mychal and I watched the "Help" on Sunday and we both laughed at your favorite part of the movie.  Mychal said, "no matter how many times you watch that scene, you always laughed so hard."  All I could do was laugh and cry.  

Baby Girl, Christopher and Mychal miss you like crazy.  Even though they do not say much, their eyes tell the story.  Mychal wants your thumb print for his B-day, so I will get it for him.

You will be proud of your Mom, she has managed to get all of her school work caught up.  It has not and is not easy to concentrate, but I am doing my best.  I was on a roll yesterday, I passed two quizzes and then I had to push my luck.  I should have stopped while I was ahead, but you know me.  I was tired and took the last quiz and you guessed it, did not pass. I will stop next time and give my brain a rest.  

Well, Baby Girl, I will end this for now.  I miss you and I love you more!

i miss you tiff, remember the crazy adventures you tanay and i would have? we'll all love and miss you forever...rest in paradise baby girl

Hello Baby Girl -  Your Marker will be here on August 1, 2012.  I am holding off until your birthday.  Your friends want to do something on your birthday and this seems to be the best way for them to say "Happy Birthday" one last time.  We will have the viewing of the Marker and then a reception afterwards.  Just a few of your closet friends will be there.

This will be my final gift to you.  Oh, Tiffanie-Ann, I miss you so much.  I received you thumb print on 7/09/12 and I put it on my chain with my cross.  I had it inscribed with "A Touch of T forever."  Pictures and a thumb print is all I have left, of course the memories.  You know I ordered some Moo Shu Pork the other night because you were heavy on my mind and I wanted to eat something you loved.  Who am I going to go eat Sushi with?  It is really difficult to eat.  You and I ate the same foods (no cheese) and its hard, yet I do my best.

Until next time, know I miss you and love you.  By the way, Olinger put a temporary Marker on your grave today and order some flowers for you.  Tiffanie-Ann, they did not know you and yet they were touch by you.  Just know you were a special girl and everyone that truly knew you knew you were amazing. Baby Girl, Baby Girl you were loved more than you knew.
Love Always,  Mom

Well, Baby Girl I made it through 4th of July.  No fireworks, no rain, and no Tiffanie-Ann.

Baby Girl, I stayed busy yesterday so I would not think.  You know how hard it is not to think - when the only thing that runs through my mind is "Tiffanie-Ann."  I say your name just to say your name.  Tiffanie-Ann is like no other name.  Mom, knew you were special.

Little Girl, this is so hard.  I want so much to hear your voice, your laugh, but most of all I want to see you.  I try not to cry around your Dad, Christopher, or Mychal.  Little Girl, the pain and hurt that you left them with is.............  Thank God for work and school.  I have to let you know, Mychal is really missing you.  Baby Girl, you left him without his best friend.  Just wanted you to know.  Your Dad and Christopher don't talk much, but I can see the pain in their faces.  So, I don't cry around them.

Well, let me see how much I get done today.  I miss you and most of all I love you.  Mom

Hello Baby Girl - Well, I made it through my birthday.  I did not do much, but I tried to keep the memories low-key today.

You would have laughed so hard at dinner.  We went to Pappadeaux Seafood Kitchen and you would have definitely liked this place.  Of course, you know Mom had to redo the menu.  I ordered an Appetizer of Smoked Salmon drizzled with olive oil and crackers.  You guessed it, delicious, for dinner I ordered the Shrimp and Catfish with Red Beans and Rice.  This is where you would start "chirping."  When they bought the plate to the table, Baby Girl, all I could do was look at it.  There was so much food on the plate, my stomach ached.  I was full from the Appetizer and could not eat another bite.  Your Dad laughed and Mychal did the chirping.  The plate was filled with a dozen of fried shrimp and not one (1) fillet of catfish, but four (4), a ton of fries, and a big bowl of red beans and rice.  I had to have all that food packed to go.

I did good to get through the day, but today the tears will not stop.  I knew you were with me yesterday, keeping me from the tears; Tiffanie-Ann you are missed.

I keep telling myself, the pain will get better - how?  Even though, each memory there is a smile, and each smile the pain is much worse.  

Well, let me get some homework done.  Just had to let you know you were missed at dinner last night.  I miss you with each passing day and you know my love for you is everlasting.               Love Mom!

Hello Baby Girl - Today is June 30, 2012 and I had a very hard time today.  Could not motive myself until 3:30 today.  I did not know what was holding me down and then I realized your funeral was one month ago - end of month.  You know every day brings something new and different with my emotions.  Been receiving birthday wishes from family and friends - telling me not to feel sad, but to celebrate.  How can I celebrate, when my daughter/friend is not here to go to the mall, to go to the movies, to go to dinner and listen to her make "chirping" noises because you knew I would take a couple of bites and be full.

Not listening to you and your brothers banter back and forth over silly stuff.  You see, you left me with all these memories and each one is painful right now.

I ran into your friend Megan and she tattooed "8-24-91 to 5-23-12 RIP TIFF".  She misses you very much and stated she wanted to carry you every where she goes.  Baby Girl, you have left a lot of people who cared and loved you deeply.

Well, Baby Girl, tomorrow is the Addams Family and then Mom's B-Day.  I love you and miss you like crazy.  You know I wake-up every morning and I say your name "Tiffanie-Ann" - there will never be another - you were the one and only "Tiffanie-Ann".  My unique and beautiful Baby Girl, you will always have my heart.  Love Mom

Dear Sister
by Mycie Robert on Monday, June 4, 2012 at 12:55am ·

Dear Sister,

 There are things I need to say. Things I want you to hear. Can't forget that horrible day.

Can't wake from this fear today. I wake up and hope that your there. Hope that you're here.

So I can say...

I just want one more hug. I want one more day with you. Here's all of my love.

Here's the things I can't say to you. I wanna hear your voice laugh, I wanna see your face smile.

One more time...

Dear Sister,

 I want to know why? Don't want to say goodbye. You should still be here, having the time of your life.

Just knowing you're here. Making me feel alright. I want to wake up and known you're there. Hope that you're still here.

So I can say...

I just want one more hug. I just want one more day with you. Here's all of my love.

Here's the things I can't say to you. I wanna hear your voice laugh, I wanna see your face smile.

One more time...

I don't want to say goodbye, yet. I shouldn't have to hope that your door will open.

There you are, You know you're the best. You  won't be forgotten. You're in all our prayers, Tiffanie-Ann.

I want one more hug, I want one more day with you. Here's all of my love.

Here's what I can't say to you. I want to hear your voice laugh, I want to see your face smile.

One more time

   Love, Me

           (P.S. I Miss You!)

The story that follows is a story of love from your brother, Mychal.  It will rip your heart out, but it is a story of love.

Baby Girl, you have left a void so deep that when I read Mychal's story it reminds me how final this really is.  You just don't know how missed and loved you really were in this family.

Mychal, I love you and I know this was not easy for you to write, but you Mother is proud that you are allowing your pain to shine through in this story.  Thank you!

Story of the Lost One
 
 This story it is not a lie, it is about how my sister died.  You will be told three things that happened; I'll tell you why I always cry; will focus on what happened at the house; what happened at the hospital; and finally what happened at the funeral.
 It was May 23rd and it was a lovely morning, the birds were chirping like nails on the chalk-board, the sky was blue like yesterday, and it was like any other day.  I walked down the stairs and I was stopped by my dogs that were delighted to see me, wagging their tails like baseball bats, I bend over and rub there squishy faces as sticky drool rolls onto my hand as if I popped a balloon with caramel.  Then they start licking my face with their wet soft tongues leaving their pasty spit on my face.  The day passes by to afternoon, I was getting ready to take my shower and I turn around, and there she was, my sister walks into her room and starts whispering to my dog Dopey, like they were at a slumber party.
 One hour later, all hell breaks loose, my brother busted open my door with his hand as if it were a battering-ram, and screams “TIFFANIE-ANN HUNG HERSELF!” I replied, “What?!” I ran down the stairs as fast as I could and there she was hanging.  Her eyes were closed as if she were sleeping; her hands and feet were blue like the Atlantic Ocean.  I go over and try to put her over my shoulder so she can start breathing again, but she was heavy as a mountain.  So I ran to the kitchen with the speed of Flash to grab the scissors, and then I put my arm under hers for support and the touch of her skin was as cold as subzero.  I cut her down and my sister's weight was so heavy we both feel to the ground, as this was happening my brother was on the phone with 911, I untied the rest of the rope on her neck and as it loosened I heard the sound of her last breath “AHH”, the sound of relief that she had lived her life and that she was moving on.
 Soon after that the cops, ambulance, and the fire truck came and me and my brother were sent outside so that the paramedics could try to save my sister.  Previously, I called my parents to rush home, after my parents showed up it started to rain like money at a stripper bar.  The rain felt warm to the touch, but cold after it set in, and the lightning was striking as if the world knew we lost someone.  My brother and the rest of us were pushed behind my dad's car so the paramedics could bring my sister to the ambulance.  As they brought her out, there was this machine on her chest that was bouncing up and down like a basketball trying to start her heart again.  My Mom left behind the ambulance which was rushing my sister to the hospital, and I, my Dad, and my brother were stuck at the house because my sister hid the keys to my Dad's car, funny right!  Instead we had to take my brother's shitty ass small car.  My brother dropped me and my Dad at the hospital, as each rain drop hit my head it felt like a brick landing on my head making me feel smaller and smaller and worried that we were too late, but hoping that there was a miracle that they revived my sister.  We walk through the front door and my Dad says “My daughter was sent here, Tiffanie-Ann Bodeman, is she ok? Is she alive?”  The nurse went back to see and some guy walked through the doors and directed us to a room and replied, “I'm afraid to tell you that they lost her on the way here, and they could not revive her”.   As that last word was said it felt like the world stopped and I was in a nightmare I couldn't wake up from.  They moved us back to where my mom was and she was on the floor praying that God would be as generous and send my sister back to us; but he never answered.
 During this time at the hospital there was this annoying lady who was dressed in a low-cut shirt and a skirt like a teenager, but you could clearly tell she was old, and her phone was going off CONSTANTLY, and she would not leave us alone.  Later, she took us to see my sister one last time, my Mom and Dad went in close to see my sister, but as I walked in and saw my sister and her body was covered except her head, and there was this tube down her throat; and I just could not handle it, so I ran back outside and I started to cry uncontrollably, and the annoying lady came out to comfort me, but all she was doing was saying stuff like, “She must of been your best friend”, “Were you guys close?”… I almost screamed “BITCH GO AWAY”, but luckily for her I kept my mouth shut, and she left to go coddle my Mom. 
 As the nightmare continues, that day ended and I lay on my bed and I start to cry.  I start crying out to the heavens, “Give her back”, “She's mine”, “Give me one more hug”, “and Give me one more day with her”.   I keep wishing and praying for a sign that my sister was okay.  That night I had a dream that I saw her and she gave me a hug, I felt that moment in my dream as if it were really happening, but I woke up to reality.  One night later, when I and my friends were at the hookah bar, trying to decide on what to get I stumbled across a hookah called “Tiffany” and I asked my friends “Can we get this one in honor to my sister?”  Once we got it tasted good, can't really tell you what was in it because I don't remember.  Later on I went outside because my sister's death was getting to me; I walked around the corner behind the dark shadowy building and I sat up against the wall that felt like an edgy comb.  I pulled up her picture on my phone and I started to get depressed.  I wished for a sign that she was okay and then this figure attacked me, I reacted like a little girl and said, “What was that?” Then the shadowy figure attacked me again, it was a bat, and I got up and ran back to the bar and look up and said “HAHA, very funny Tiffanie-Ann”.
 A week passes and it was time for the funeral.  We got into a car that the funeral home provided and it smelled like old people and baby-powder, the seats were made of leather, so it felt like it was waxed as we swished back and forth driving to the funeral.  As we walked in, all my sister's friends were there and as requested they wore rainbow colors, and they did look like a rainbow.  Also, around her casket were Pixie-Sticks and the last cup of chocolate milk she drank that morning.  Inside her casket were things that she loved such as her favorite perfume Princess, her two favorite movies Beauty & the Beast and Master of Disguise, her tie-dye teddy bear from her computer desk, and her favorite flower a rose.  In her memory my Mom's friend Kathi Dean-Lee told everyone how the relationship between her and my sister, my sister and me, and my brother was; I told my bat attack story because I knew it would make people laugh.  As the funeral went on it came to the time to bury my sister, but we didn't throw dirt on her casket because it would have been even harder to deal with.  Instead we put her in an artificial ground. As her casket was being lowered, it felt like it was going slow as if she was waving goodbye.
               In conclusion, till this day I still think this story is a bloody nightmare, but it is all true no lie was told.  I'm very sorry you had to read this story, it hurt so much telling you about the day she died and what happened at my house that I can barely stand being in, what occurred at the hospital with the annoying lady, and finally what played out at my sister's funeral; which I still wish it was a bad dream.

I could not sleep last night, knowing what the next day would bring.  Today is June 23, 2012 and you have been gone a month.  My prayer is that you are at peace and that you are free from the pain and hurt.  Baby Girl, I love you.  Just know that you are still in my prayers and I know God is showing and giving you the love you sought from others.  Just know that the real and true love was in this house and it will never change.  I love you and miss you.  Rest in Peace my beautiful Tiffanie-Ann.  Love Mom

I remember going over to your has in San Mateo and Tiffanie would be on her bouncie horse riding it has fast as she could, you'd think she was flying down the street, bouncing on it has fast has she could.. We'll Tiffanie I know your flying now your a Guarding Angel looking over your family..Your family misses and love you...

Tiffanie-Ann - Today is not a good day at all.  I am angry you are gone and I am angry I was not there to help you.  You promised me you would come to me and you did not do it.  Instead you did the one thing I never thought you would do.  Why?  I have always been here for you as well as your brothers.  You turned to everyone accept the two people who really cared about you (your Dad and Mom).

I want to scream!  You really do not know how much you meant to this family.  You have left this hole and I personally do not know how to get out of it.  Pretending one day at a time is not working for me, each day that hole gets bigger and bigger.  I am trying to move on, but it is so hard.  I feel I have failed you as a Mother and for that I am sorry.  Is today a pity party - no, I am just angry you are gone and I don't know what to do or think at time.  Some days are good and then there are those days I just don't know.

You will be gone a month and all I can think about is what did I do so wrong?  Even the memories hurt.  How do I move on when each day is a struggle just to breath.  I never thought I would loose a child like this - this has blind sided me.  The pain, it hurts so bad and the tears they just keep falling.

 Just know my anger is not with you, it's with this void I have and not knowing how to get past it.  Maybe one day peace will find me, but right now I want my Baby Girl back!  I want to hug you, I want to sit and watch a movie with you, I to go walking in the mall with you - I want...........  Well, let me close for now.  It seems I am repeating myself.  I love you and miss you more than you can ever imagine.  Mom

Walk On By Faith

We cannot see in the future, no Lord
And we cannot see through dark cloud, Lord
We cannot see, Lord, through all of our tear drop, oh Lord
Walk on by faith each day
Walk on, Lord, by faith each day

We cannot see, Lord, through our tear drop
And it's hard to smile through all our trial
We cannot see, Lord, through all of our pitfall
Lord, have mercy

Oh, happy to walk on
Oh, by faith, Lord, each day
Oh, happy to walk on
Oh, by faith, Lord, each day

On a Monday, I walk on,
On a Tuesday, Lord, I keep walking on
And I led by Jesus, Jesus, be
Lord, You'd be my guide, Lord
Yes, I know Your able, carry my load
And You can see Lord, see Lord, down the road

Yes, happy to walk on
Oh, by faith, Lord each day
Yes, happy to walk on
Oh, by faith, each day

TIFFANIE ANN NICOLE BODEMAN.
THE MEMORIESYOU LEFT YOUR GRANDMA GILLIAM,ARE NOW MY TREASURES. I WILL CHERISH THEM ALWAYS.LOVE,
AND MISS YOU AND GRANDPA GILLIAM SO,SO,MUCH.GRANDMA GILLIAM.

You Pulled Me Through

I was in the darkness I was out in the cold
Seemed nothing could heal this this hole in my soul
You reached out your arms to me held out your heart to me
Pulled me back from the edge thought I'd reached the end

When I was drowning when I was so confused
You you you pulled me through
I was in the shadows lost nothing left to lose
You you you pulled me through

You gave my faith back faith was so hard to find
You gave me my life back you were my lifeline
The love that you gave me is love that has saved me
Your strength is what made me strong
You held me and I held on

When I was drowning when I was so confused
You oh you you pulled me through
I was in the shadows lost nothing left to lose
You oh you you pulled me through

Out of the dark into your arms into the light
Your love saved my life
 
When I was drowning when I was so confused
You oh you you pulled me through

When I was drowning when I was so confused
You oh you yeah you you pulled me through
Oh said you oh you pulled me through

Baby Girl, you know you left your Momma and she is having a hard time really believing you are gone.  I was remembering the time in San Mateo, I was running frantically around the house looking for you.  I was calling your Dad, crying "I can't find Tiffanie-Ann."  As I am on the phone I saw the whites of your eyes and you were in the fireplace covered in soot.  I dropped the phone and pulled you out and you had this big smile on your face.

I bathed you, washed your hair and made you all beautiful again.  You always had this way of making me worry, but you always had that beautiful smile.  Baby Girl, everyday it gets harder and harder knowing you are truly gone.  Yes, I have the memories, but I rather have you here with me!  Selfish, I know and I know God is giving and showing you the love you desperately was seeking from others.

The real love Baby Girl, was in your home.  It was truly unconditional.  Your Dad, your brothers, and most of all your mother loved you more than you know.  Know I love you more than words can convey.   Mom

When Tiffanie-Ann was around 3 years old she got her first bike, she learned to ride it in front of our house. It did not take her long before she felt like she could ride anywhere on her bike, I told her she could ride up and down the sidewalk and could not ride it to the park, she looked at me and said 'The park is not that far away I can make it there, watch' and she took off in the direction of the park. 

I started yelling 'Stop Tiffanie-Ann' and she yelled back 'Don't worry I know where I am going'. 

The park was about 8 blocks away and there were two intersections with Stop signs. I turned around and grabbed her brother Mychal, he was only a year old and told her older brother Christopher to follow me and we began running after Tiffanie-Ann. 

She got to the first intersection with a Stop sign and did not hesitate and drove right through it, luckily there were no cars. 

She got to the second intersection with a Stop sign and a car was just arriving, the driver saw Tiffanie-Ann and me about a half a block behind her running and yelling 'Stop Tiffanie-Ann, Stop', fortunately the driver waited for both of us get through the intersection before proceeding.

Tiffanie-Ann rode all the ways to the park without stopping once, when she got to the park she stopped by the swings and waited for me, when I finally caught up to her she looked at me and said 'I told you I could make it to the park'

Tiffanie-Ann interpreted the statement 'that she could not ride her bike to the park' as a challenge not a request, this was who she ways a person who took things as a challenge not a restriction or limitation

Baby Girl - I finally made it to the library on 6/11/12 and I managed to get some homework done.  Yes, you were on my mind, but I know you do not want me to stop living.  A piece of my heart is gone and everyday I make the effort to get out of bed.  I'm writing you again, because this morning I fixed some bacon, eggs, and hash-brown and I could see you on the couch and asked if you wanted some.  Of course you always said "yes."  Baby Girl, I truly miss you - I just want to see your beautiful smile or hear your voice. Love Your Mother!

June 8,2012    TIFFANIE ANN BODEMAN                                                  TODAYS DAY IS THE SAME DAY YOUR GRANDPA GILLIAM DIED . I LOVE AND MISS U BOTH SO MUCH . THE TEARS WON'T STOP FLOWING THATS OK GOD IS A GOOD GOD AND HE WILL CONTINUE TO TAKE CARE OF ME .                       LOVE GRANDMA GILLIAM

I went to Bible Study last night and Pastor spoke on "faith of a mustard seed."  Baby Girl, I know God is telling me to keep the faith, because you are with Him and He is loving you.  I put fresh flowers on your grave and I replaced the balloons.  I just want you to know each I wake up and I expect to see you making your chocolate milk.  I going to go buy some Silk Chocolate Milk today and have a glass, since you always drank it all up before I could get a glass.  I am doing my best to breath again and each day it gets a little easier.  This house is so quiet and your brothers believe it or not miss you not laying on the couch watching TV.  You know your partner in crime (Mychal) miss you not watching TV with him.  He occupy his time with school and hangs out with Christan and Lauren all the time.  

Dad is on-call for the next two weeks, so you know he is working late.  Mom is trying to get back into the books, since I am behind.  Mid-terms are coming up and I need to get to work.  I am going to spend all day Saturday at the library in hopes of getting the work done. Faith of a mustard seed - right!

Well, I am going to try and get some things done today, but whatever gets done will be enough and will have to do.  Momma, miss you Baby Girl!  Much Love Always

Baby Girl, today is June 4, 2012 and I still cannot find the words to tell you what you truly meant to me.  Tiffanie-Ann, you were a joy in my life.  Each of my children were a constant reminder of God's grace and mercy.  I need you to know one thing, I always knew you belonged to God and it is His will that controls our destiny; yet I thought I would have time to see you become the unique and special person that was waiting to shine.  You and your brothers have always been my heart and know each day will be just as hard as the day you passed.  Your Momma Love You forever and always.

Sister Sharon, You and your family are in our thoughts....and prayers.

To Sister Sharon and the Bodeman family,
Words cannot express the sadness of my heart for you. When the phone calls stop and the people are gone your family at House of Hope will be there for you.

May God continue to bless and comfort you during this difficult time. Kimberly & Steven Reed (Drake)

Bodeman family, our heart goes out to you for your loss.  Words cannot express how much we pray for you in this time and want to do whatever we can to support you.

To the Gilliam-Bodeman Family.  We extend our deepest condolences to you and your family during this difficult time.  May God comfort and strengthen you during this time. Our prayers are with you always!!!  Love, your cousins, Carla and Kermit Drake, (Detroit, MI)

John, Sharon, Christopher, and Mychal, 
I was informed by Kathy of Tiffanie-Ann's passing. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I remember when Tiffanie-Ann was little and Christopher would hold her on his lap at your dad's house.  She was a joy to watch her giggle with big brother.  She is with your dad now watching over the rest of the family I am sure.  My deepest sympathies to you all.  I am praying for you all.

Hi Sharon. I just wanted to let you know that you & your family are in my prayers during your time of bereavement.

TRUSTING HIM:
Life's an adventure, for we don't know how God will direct us from where we stand now.  We need only to trust Him to show us the way, and He will reveal it day by day.  Sharon and John, words are really inadequate.  I can't even imagine how you must be feeling.  But I just wanted to let you know that I am keeping you in my prayers and send my condolence to you from me and my family.
Prayerfully yours,
Joanne & Family

Sending my condolence to the Gilliam-Bodeman Family! May God strengthen you during this time of sorrow!

I am a friend of Sharon Lawrence.  I am praying for your family that the Lord will comfort and strengthen all.  Please know that Earth has no sorry that Heaven cannot healed.

Tiff!!! God I miss you soooo much! I think about you everyday and all of the good times we had together! I know you're looking down on all of us who cared so much about you. You will truly be missed and you are truly loved! RIP Tiff.

May God's continuing love, surround you during this time of lost,Our prayers are with you all. Love Lawrence and Brenda(Drake) Peete

To the Bodeman Family, You have our deepest sympathy,may god Bless and keep you in his arms.

I am a friend of Sharon Lawrence. You have our deepest symapthy. May the love of God abide with the family during the time of great loss.

Know that God is still God. I am sure that Tiffanie is resting now in the arms of Jesus. We are sadden by the passing of your child, but know that you are in our prayers and we are your family. 

Reverend Gerald and Adrienne McMillian

The entire Drake & Lawrence Families were deeply saddened to hear of Tiffanie's passing. We will continue to keep the entire family in our prayers. 


LOVE ALWAYS - Sharon Drake-Lawrence & Family

Sharon, John and family,  I cant express the heart breaking sadness of the going home of Tiffanie.  God called one of his beautiful flowers home and she is in his arms.  I love  you and the family. I am here  Love  Mysie and family

Hello,
Sharon and John, Christopher and Mychal, 
We send our love to you all. May God be with you and comfort you. To say good-bye and wait for eternity is not easy.
May you know that you have the strength courage and love that you need.
When you are not strong and need a friend we are here.
Nothing will ever get in the way of love for you, You always showed your love for Tiffanie-Ann, baking her, her favorite peanut-butter cups, telling us how Tiffanie-Ann ate them all, your movie nights with the popcorn no interruptions. A mothers and daughters special time. Always and forever Tiffanie-Ann and Sharon as I know you. Tiffanie-Ann your mom loved you so much may you be in Gods presence as the angel you are. 

Kathi and Isaac Lee







m

Tiffanie-Ann was a unique individual, it was not because of the way she looked, which was definitely unique, it was because of who she was, an energetic fun loving personality with a beautiful smile and a heart to match. She could make you angry one minute and make you laugh the next. When she would do something to make me upset she would look at me and say 'You gotta love me'. I always did and will forever

My beautiful Niece Tiffanie-Ann, I will always have the memories of taking you and your brother to Lake Tahoe with Grandma. I love You and will miss you. You will always be remembered.

Tiffanie, 
As I sit here writing this I ask to myself why it was time to fly? You are such an amazing, beautiful, spectacular, most outgoing, didn't care what people think type of person. I still can't believe your gone. Its just to soon. I love you girl! RIP <3

Tiffanie,words can't express how I feel. I am going to miss you! I know you and grandpa are looking down on us, watching over us! Until we meet again I hope you rest in peace! I love you! 
Katrina and London

Baby Girl - I miss you so much and know you will never, never, be forgotten.  You are my Heart!

OBITUARY

Tiffanie-Ann Nicole Bodeman

August 24, 1991 – May 23, 2012

Olinger Funeral, Cremation & Cemetery - Chapel Hill

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