They crew. (“Dad,” far left, Jason(me), then Tommy, Kyle, and Big Swoll as you move from left to right.)

Kyle and I am unsure exactly who the other guy is, possibly Big Swoll. It’s hard for me to tell in this picture.

Kyle, my brother at the Asian Restaurant.

Me (Jason) at an Asian restaurant. I don’t think it was Vietnamese but Tommy suggested it. I think Sennie was with us as well (a girl from the game), Kyle, Dad and Tommy were there too. I am unsure who else was there, maybe Big Swoll.

Lol. We are all such dorks. :) Tommy is in the back center. My brother Kyle on the right front, someone to the right of him, I think his in game name is BigSwoll but I don’t remember his real name. I am on the left and possibly “Dad,” as Tommy called him is on the left, just the face. We were doing a Giant Baphomet  Run in Ragnarok Online.

My sons and I met Tommy playing Ragnarok, an online game. We visited Tommy and he and his family couldn’t have been friendlier, playing the game on laptops in his room and being amazed at his DDR skillz. We’re so sad he’s gone - Jeff, Jason, and Kyle

…wow…I visited Tommy with my dad in New Orleans maybe 2013ish from Florida where we live. I met Tommy through a video game we both played Ragnarok Online. Tommy got to ride in my dad’s small plane and he had a blast. We all had a beneigh downtown as well as ate pho at a local restaurant that Tommy picked out. I thoroughly enjoyed going to Mass with Tommy on one occasion which was in Vietnamese/English/Latin which was an amazing cultural and religious experience. I also went to Chinese New Year with him on another occasion when my brother was with us who also played the video game and knew Tommy. I got to try the Boba Tea which was an amazing experience with tapioca. Tommy is my friend. Rest in peace with the King.

Peace to your family and friends.

-Jason Bauer

What to say? Tommy was an absolutely awesome person and truly a superstar. I will miss he times of giving certain bands grief for skipping our areas (his more than mine)  and yeah I'd razz him about it to just random daily interactions about things.  It's just not going to be the same without you.

My deepest condolences to the family of Tommy..may the lord comfort you all doing this time of sorrow..Praying for peace with great memories od him.. 🙏

I knew Tommy for a long time through From Ashes to New and finally got to meet him at their concert in December 2023. We were good friends from that day since. He visited me in Virginia 3 times in one week last summer when he got a dog that his dad wouldn't let him keep so he had to drive it all the way back to PA from New Orleans. 
Tommy was my great friend and I miss him dearly, this breaks my heart.

Another rock concert. It was always mine and Tommy favorite thing to do together.

So sorry for the family , my Prayers are with you guys and for Tommy RIP my friend , you touched so many souls . 🙏🏻

Any time a member of the ABR family passes away, it’s a tragedy. Sending prayers to his family for strength and comfort in this difficult time. Rest in peace, my friend. You whispered your grief, screamed your sorrow, and proclaimed your love, along with the rest of this family. We love you.

I’m so happy to have been with Tommy for many shows. This is one of my favorite photos from this past CBR after JB brought him a setlist. Tommy was beyond excited to receive this and I will always cherish this moment

Tommy was incredibly generous and kind. He traveled far and wide to see my bandmates and I in August Burns Red play. He did his best to make sure each of us felt special, which was certainly above and beyond what he needed to do. I can't tell you how many times he spoiled us with cakes, Eagles merch, and encouraging words. We will miss seeing his friendly face at our shows. His enthusiasm and positive attitude was truly inspirational as we knew the struggles he had to go through on a daily basis with his health. We won't forget about you, Tommy.

JB/ABR

This picture was the last time I saw Tommy in PA. We met up at a From Ashes to New show in Harrisburg,  PA. He had been wanting a selfie with me the last time we saw each other at a previous From Ashes to New show in Harrisburg,  PA. He reminded me this last time and I finally got one. After I posted this picture,  he asked me for a copy.  He always thought I was beautiful.  We started out with having From Ashes To New in common and eventually, he started sharing kpop music groups I hadn't heard of.  We shared a lot of the same music. He would even share his experience with Uber since I was doing Uber too, but he had been doing it longer than I have. I would ask him questions and it helped.  He helped me make more money with Uber.  
Tommy had gone through so much. He is such a strong person and I admired that and I was always proud of all the concerts he traveled for. If I had enough money, I would be doing that all the time myself.  I'm gonna miss him.

This was at the New Years Day and Savage After Midnight concert in 2019 in New Orleans. Security had to tell us to leave because we were talking to Savage After Midnight for a long time! We met at a From Ashes to New concert in the summer of 2018. Proud to have been his friend!

My heart is in shock.  Tommy was such a light.  His love for music and traveling was infectious.  I hope you rest in peace.  Prayers for his family and friends.  I will be there with you Saturday in spirit.  <3

Here is a clip of Tommy at an eagles game watching his favorite player (Jake Elliot) kick a 61 yard field goal! Another fond memory of my friend I won’t forget.

My Thoughts and prayers are with Tommy and his friends and family! Always enjoyed seeing you at the August Burns Red Concerts!

My most deepest condolences to Tommy’s entire family. Although I didn’t know Tommy in person, I knew him from Facebook and knew that he loved rock music and the Philadelphia Eagles. He was very passionate for the both, we were both fans of from ashes to new!!! One of his many favorite of bands !! May you rest in peace 🙏🤘

Matt was always happy to see Tommy and spared no expense at giving his time for a conversation with him. Seeing them interact was always sweet and I know Tommy cherished every moment he spent with Matt Greiner.

The Death Below album release party was a highlight of my time spent with Tommy. He was so excited to get to see the band and spend time with his friends. His compassion was unrivaled and will be missed tremendously

Seeing Tommy’s face light up at some of my favorite spots around Lancaster was always a treat. Tommy never took a day for granted and lived his life to the fullest. He was a work hard play hard kind of person with a heart of gold. I’ll never forget the time we spent exploring, eating, chatting and of corse concert going together. Tommy was a dear dear friend and I will be missing him forever.

To the Cao family,

Tommy was such a bright light in our ABR community. So many of us have a deep connection with their music & loved it when Tommy got to attend a show, meet up with the band, and tell us all about it. Because we would do the exact same thing. These shows are healing & spiritual experiences, and having people to share them with means everything to us.

He crossed my thoughts today, and I was shattered when I heard the news. By the way, I never met Tommy. We never talked. But he left a very strong impression on me, and I always followed his updates. Not only did we relate in music preferences, but in our inner struggles, and where we looked for peace. Tommy was such a great example of the band's core message: love, resilience, and hope. We never met, but Tommy inspired and touched many people's lives, more than he realized. In a way, he made us all stronger because he showed us that we could face our struggles head-on. 

https://www.facebook.com/1028574326/videos/364423239193898/
I saw his favorite song was Beauty in Tragedy, and it will forever remind me of him.

"Tomorrow, the air will be a little colder, 
but I will be sure to breathe for the both of us. 
And the nights, may be a little darker, 
but I'll be sure to carry the torch to warm the hearts 
that never got to feel yours. 
I can't hear your voice, but that's ok, 
cause I can feel you in my heart."

My heart goes out to Tommy's family during this difficult time. I understand this is a time of great sorrow, and I wanted to let you know that many people are thinking of you and offering our deepest condolences.

Sincerely,
Pablo Villalpando, San Diego

I met Tommy once at a show in New Orleans! I've known him through a mutual like about a band From Ashes to New! I too was once a dialysis patient. I tried to help him support and reassurance that he needed to not give up. Not fair he was taken this way

I am honored to have been Tommy's friend and I will forever be grateful for the time I was given with him. I will carry his memory with me always.

There isn’t much I could say that I haven’t already said on his Facebook page but this is a huge loss, and I’m so sorry for all of you 😭🥺 take care of each other and love each other the way he would love you ❤️

Philly 2022 … Hanging out for the weekend and ABR/Light the Torch/Killswitch Engage concert

Philly 2022 - Tommy was THRILLED by the snow. He was running all over outside waving his hands all around and shouting, and when he saw the video we took, he said he looked like a happy old lady 😂🥺

OBITUARY

Tommy Hoang Cao

September 4, 1989 – April 23, 2025

St. Bernard Memorial Funeral Home & Gardens

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