Deirdre Mae Flannery Gollop

May 5, 1947July 20, 2021

Deirdre Flannery Gollop, described by friends as "a glowing light in this world", passed away on Tuesday, July 20th. She was surrounded by her adoring husband, Frank, and her daughters, Kirstin, Kelsey and Caitlin. She was 74 years young.

Deirdre's greatest pride and joy was her seven grandchildren. She lives on in each of them: Sadie has her determination, Cooper her sweet sensitivity, Grace her spunk, Brynn her empathy, Wyatt her curiosity, McKenna her joyful generosity, and Trevor has her love for making people laugh.

This incomparable woman of glamour, grit and grace loved and lived for her friends and family. Deirdre was a force and dedicated her energy to being a rock for all who knew her, no matter how well or how close. She taught her three girls (and often reminded their husbands, Graham, John and Ryan) to strive for whatever they wanted, never take 'no' for an answer and, above all, care for each other. She created a family, "Team Gollop", whose members are completely dedicated to one another and will continue her legacy, constantly giving their hearts and their time to others as she did.

Deirdre had a sparkle, a playful childlike spirit and no one made a room of people belly laugh as hard as she. Deirdre loved to entertain by telling stories about the children who made her so proud or the travels she enjoyed so much. Everything she touched, from the rooms she designed to her beloved gardens, was beautiful and colorful, and she was stylishly dressed for every occasion.

Born Deirdre Mae Flannery, this vivacious Irishwoman grew up in Los Angeles, California with her loving parents, Philip and Julianna, and her sister, Daniele. As a young woman, Deirdre enjoyed cheerleading and parties of every kind. Before graduating from Santa Clara University, she met Frank Gollop who would become her devoted husband of 51 years. After Deirdre pursued her Masters in Special Education at the University of Southern California (making plenty of time along the way for fun at the beaches she loved), she and Frank moved to Wisconsin where she directed research projects for specialized childhood education at the University of Wisconsin. With this work followed by starting her family in a cozy Madison house to teaching first graders in Wayland, Massachusetts at Happy Hollow School, Deirdre's lifelong devotion to enhancing the lives of others began.

The family will hold a private burial for Deirdre in her beloved garden by the sea at which her daughters will sing her favorite songs and her grandchildren will read notes and share drawings.

In place of flowers, the family requests that donations be made in Deirdre's honor to National Jewish Health in Denver, Colorado - the world's leading respiratory hospital and a place that provided her with great care and hope.

Deirdre was cherished by so many, from Weston and Chatham, MA to Madison, WI to Los Angeles and San Francisco, CA. Her vibrant presence will be missed at the Weston Garden Club, Chatham Walkers, Monomoy Yacht Club, and her many bridge groups and book clubs. There will never be anyone like her and she will be forever missed. Her family is supported by the memories of her strength and laughter. They find great peace imagining Deirdre joyful with her loved ones who have passed before as she builds another dream home in the place that her faith guaranteed.


No public services are scheduled at this time. Receive a notification when services are updated.


Deirdre Mae Flannery Gollop

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Dolly Englert Trout

September 11, 2021

I just learned of Dede's passing and my heart is broken. She touched so many lives! Her beautifully written obituary and heartfelt memories truly reflect who she was and how she lived her life.
As high school classmates we were the typical teenagers eager to have fun and meet boys. One evening we were driving down Sunset Blvd in LA, flirting with others as we would try to outrun them in my '57 Chevy, giggling all the way. And who did we end up connecting with? None other than John Denver... yes, the real John Denver. He and his friend followed us to Nancy Meeks house where they joined us for a party. Wish we had taken pictures of this memorable event!
On another occasion we told her Dad that we were going to the movies (back when they always had double features). So glad he never asked what we saw, because actually went to see John Denver, and the New Christy Minstrels at Ledbetters in Westwood CA. Afterwards we drove to the San Fernando Valley for a party the performers were having. We had fun, came back to Dede's and Dad never did find out!
You could always count on Dede to create wonderful memories, as she had a heart of gold and lived her values and faith out loud.
No doubt she is being embraced by our loving God, thanking Him for providing her with such a beautiful life and legacy.
Truly, Dede was an angelic inspiration in life and continues to be one in heaven.

Julie Weick

September 8, 2021

I went to high school at Notre Dame with Dede and will always remember how friendly and kind she was to all

Denise Hargleroad Gibbon

August 6, 2021

I met DeDe at Santa Clara University over fifty years ago and we shared a room and many joys when we spent our junior year in Vienna. Over the last year, when the Institute for European Studies reached out to some of us, I thought many times of contacting her. Regrettably, I did not. We had a grand year in 1967-68 as two chocoholics living across the street from a Viennese chocolate shop. She and I put on many pounds indulging in Sachertorte and other whipped cream delights in the teashops. We loved driving through the beautiful countryside with our dear landlady and her son in the world's smallest car and, of course, were thrilled and fascinated with every new taste, view and smell. We shared our mishaps with the German language and the timely scheduling our one bath a week but I think we both managed to find formals to wear to the Opera Ball. DeDe was the best as a friend and room-mate. I can tell from the messages left here that she never changed--always gracious, thoughtful, optimistic, and soooo ready to laugh and love. My heart goes out to Frank, to his girls, and their spouses and children--to all who were lucky enough to have known her. Eine ganz besondere Frau--a very special lady in any language.

Patricia Demling

August 3, 2021

I am so sad at Deirdre’s passing! My prayers are with Frank and their whole family! I have such fond memories of shared holidays, ski vacations, bridge and so many more fun times!
May our God lift her up! RIP Deirdre!

Tess Kanupp

July 31, 2021

Dear Frank and family Our dearest condolences to you. How sweet Deirdre was and will always be remembered by me. I only worked for you for a short time,but, her happiness was contagious,
Hoping you and family are doing well. Sincerely, Tess😢😔 and Larry Kanupp

Patty Hornblower

July 28, 2021

I met Deidre playing bridge in Weston. We then became great bridge partners and I'll always remember she wanted to play West as she was "a West girl" coming from California. I was lucky enough to be invited to a lovely neighborhood party in Chatham, even though, my cape house is in Brewster. Everything was perfect and Deidre was, of course, the ultimate hostess. She had such a vivaciousness about her all the time. Competitive, fun, energetic and above all very caring to me. She will be missed by all. I will think of her this Fall when we're back at the bridge table in person, and she won't be there with us. But her spirt will be for sure.

Gerry Di Gesu

July 28, 2021

I knew Deirdre as a fellow book club member here in Chatham. She was warm, charming, intelligent and a delight in so many ways. I send prayers to her family that their love and support for each other will help them through this hard time. She was a gift.

John & Susan Witty

July 27, 2021

We met Deirdre and Frank in 2010 when we visited for Roger and Adrienne Denk’s anniversary. We were hosted by Deirdre and Frank in their beautiful home.

They were perfect hosts and treated us like family. Deirdre was so gracious and personable and we have fond memories of our trip to Chatham with them.

It is with a heavy heart that we send our sympathy to Frank and family.

Just know that Deirdre is spreading her love in heaven.

David Smith

July 27, 2021

Our hearts go out to Frank and your entire family. Deirdre was such a warm and loving person. She always had a smile to share. We will keep you all in our prayers.

Jackie Wendland

July 26, 2021

I met Deidre only once, a few summers ago when I was visiting close friends Roger & Adrienne Denk in Chatham. My memory of the lovely garden party at their home is still vivid in my mind....the elegant grace & style with which Deidre entertained & that she welcomed me as if we'd been friends for many years. And the tour of her beautiful gardens inspired my landscaping efforts back in my Monterey home. I have grown to cherish my friendship with Deidre's goddaughter, Kecia Denk, a young woman with a huge, compassionate heart who always makes life better for all those who cross her path, just as did her godmother Deidre. I mourn the loss of this amazing lady along with Kecia & her parents. And send my condolences to her entire family.