Brendan Idarius was the son of my cousin James Downtain Berkman and Mary Idarius (Berkman) and the brother of Emily Margaret Berkman (Owings) and he was a highly intelligent, caring and loving person and family member. I will never forget him, and I will honor his life in as many ways as I can. Since he was lucky enough and responsible enough to vote just a day or two before he died, one way I honor and remember him is to continue my tradition of never missing an election. We still love you, Brendan, and we always will. 
"Cousin" Sandy (Read Reiberg)

Dear Idarius Family,

Brendan's birthday was today, and I am thinking about Brendan and all of you.   All of us at Graf greatly miss Brendan.  I have many fond memories of Brendan and his sharp wit and huge sense of humor.  I hope that you are all doing well.

Cindy Moore

I am the oldest of Brendan's dad's cousins (along with cousin Grace) and I only met Brendan in person once, when his grandmother Barbara died in 2011? and we held her service here in Indianapolis. I had followed his growing up years and know the joy he always brought to Mary and James and Emily.  That was confirmed when we met, along with being able to immediately see all of the other characteristics enumerated in these tributes: kindness, intelligence, curiosity,  generosity,  joyful sense of humor, and empathy. I know also from our communications in the years since our meeting that he loved and cared for his family above all, but that he made the world a better place. May his legacy inspire us all. 

Brendan was a kind, easygoing person. He had a dance that I called, "The Caper". On one of our many adventures, he introduced me to one of my favorite book stores. 
Brendan was a gentle soul, and a good friend. He will be missed.


I’m not originally from Chicago and don’t have much family living close by. But over the course of 25 years, Brendan’s family became my Chicago family. When I started having everyone over for Christmas dinner, it turned into a tradition and got better every year. Now Brendan will always be there in our hearts. All my love and sympathy to my wonderful big-city family.

Form the moment I met him when he was a tiny baby, and throughout his life, Brendan exuded a brilliant liveliness, deep intelligence, and an open heart. He was a funny, creative and loving human being. Unique, independent, stubborn (in a good way.) I could go on. Too many memories to share, not enough recent ones since I have moved away. Too little time on this earth. I love you and miss you, Brendan.~ Aunt Kris

Brendan was a colleague and friend for 15 years.  He was supportive both personally and professionally.  I'm grateful for having had him in my life.  He was incapable of ever being unkind.  Aside from being such a super nice person, he had a great sense of humor and was a very interesting person.  Brendan had real depth and could speak on any topic.  I loved his total being and will forever miss him.  I wish I could be there today in person to celebrate his life.  My condolences to his family.  

Brendan and I have lots of memories with the kids. Even though I've moved away we still tried to keep in touch. He will forever be missed and loved ❤ 

Just shy of 30 years, wow,  I didn't expect this.  How lucky am I to have had you in my life Brendan!  You literally saved my life when you brought me home to your family as a kid.  You provided me with the safety and friendship of a brother, the understanding of a soul kindred spirit, the undying patience to nurture me through all my wounds.  You probably filled the place of about five family members when it came to my emotional needs.  
Oh and the protection of two body guards. People felt safe and  accepted around you.

I loved falling asleep ( and singing under my breath) to your guitar, it soothed me when we were young and older.   
You're genius intelligence kept me interested in life and  distracted from petty dullness.
 You were the first person in my life to say I would make a great psychologist or teacher.  I believed you because you're so smart and look where it took me.  We came along way from penny poker and rolled cigarettes. I can't believe youre gone. 

Thank you for being born. Thank you for being so good to me. 

I have so many fond memories of Brendan over the nearly 20 years that I have known him. From struggling to pronounce his name correctly when we first met, to playing Cards Against Humanity, to Karaoke, to helping my daughter move, to staying up talking long after everyone else had fallen asleep... And so much more.  

Brendan had a heart of gold.  He loved his children so much and spoke of them often.  He was a wonderful friend, the best friend, to my daughter Alexandria.  He always had her back.  It gave me great comfort to know that she had someone she could count on. 

Brendan had a great laugh.  He was highly intelligent and loved to share his knowledge.  Not in a showy "know it all" way, but a casual informative way.  His passing has left the world with a big hole in it.  He will forever be missed.

So sorry for your loss. I knew Brendan through James his dad, who I worked with and lived near for years. My son Mark and Brendan played together when we lived in the same apartment complex. Later, when Brendan grew up, I got him a job where I worked and we became adult friends. He was a happy, funny guy and will be missed.❤

Brendan had the greatest attitude, and was so positive, during the four years I worked with him at Graf Air Freight. I can’t believe he’s gone. The last time I saw him was at my aunt’s cancer treatment fundraiser. Despite the fact we were no longer co-workers by that time, he came to my family’s aid and it is just another example of how generous/kind/considerate he was. He will be missed dearly. 

Brendan, I will never again be able to think of the following things without also thinking of you:

Swedish Fish
Bicycles
Critical Mass
Street Art
The Mahna-Mahna song
Guitars
Flannel Shirts 
6 Day Work Weeks
Key Lime pies
Pineapple Upside Down Cake
JBs Pizza
Pickle juice
Gold Buick LaSabres
Flat Caps
Newport Cigarettes
Rogers Park and West Ridge
Lane Tech High School
Teenage Parenthood
Truman College
Subway
The Chicago Accent
Airports
The Smashing Pumpkins
Your Children
Righteous Anger
Desperate Anger
James Joyce
Metallica
Crutches
Basement Apartments
Donuts
Dad's Nose
When Someone Sneezes Many Times in a Row

I love you, Brendan-loni-macaroni. I wish you hadn't gone and left us.

Love,
Your annoying little sister Emily






Brendan was an AMAZING person.  I will miss him dearly. Always a smiling face,  always had a story to tell.  My life im Chicago was made brighter each day when I walked into work to his smiling face.  You will be greatly missed, Brendan.  Until we meet again.

Brendan was a dear friend and coworker.  He joined Graf Air Freight in November 2005 and was a key part of our Graf team.  We   
enjoyed many hours of working together and chatting about our families, world events and work.  Brendan loved his family completely and i like to think he loved his Graf family too.  He lived life with gusto and had a kind and gentle heart which we all cherished and appreciated.  I will miss him.   Sincerest sympathies to his family.          
 


Brendan was a smart, funny, loyal, upstanding, person. I will miss him dearly. Not only was he was a loyal legacy integral employee at Graf Air Inc but also a big part my life throughout the years. I cannot put into words how much he will be missed by all that knew him. My prayers and love go out to his family in this time of great sadness. 

OBITUARY

Brendan Idarius

June 28, 1976 – November 5, 2020

Drake & Son Funeral Home

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