Dr. Victor Sam Bathini

Dr. Victor Sam Bathini was born on May 20, 1947, the second child of the late pastor and Mrs. Samuel Bathini in Rajahmundry Andhra Pradesh. He had three sisters. As the only son, he was definitely the favorite of the family. He was a curious and willful child who grew into a loveable, diligent, and humble young man. He lived a life of constant striving toward higher goals, fulfilling his and other people’s dreams along the way.

In Pune, he earned his B.A. from Spicer Memorial College, and his M.A. at Poona University. In 1970, after graduating, he began his career as a teacher and Dean of boys at SDA High School, Narsapur, Andhra Pradesh.

On May 30, 1972 he married the love of his life, Hepsy Dawson. Together, they moved to Nasapur, where they were blessed with two wonderful children, Vinod and Vinitha.

He held various positions throughout his career. He was principal of M.C. Dhamanwala Higher Secondary, in Surat and Principal of SDA High School, Vijayawada. As Director of the Education Department at Central India Union, he was a reliable and resourceful colleague, superintending a vast network of boarding and higher secondary schools. He was continually designing new programs that fostered quality education, and he was always supportive of his colleagues who admired and valued his leadership. Countless people are educated because of his efforts, and many professionals have thrived because of his leadership.

In 1989, he immigrated to the U.S. in pursuit of furthering his own education. He excelled, and 1994 earned his Ed.S in Administration and Leadership. In 1996, he fulfilled his dream by earning his PhD in Administration and Leadership.

In 1990, he opened a world of dreams to his children by bringing them and his wife to the United States. They blossomed in the new environment he provided them, earning college degrees themselves. This was only possible because of their father’s nurturing and vision.

In recent years, he worked as a HIPPA compliance officer at Peppermint Ridge, where his colleagues unsurprisingly valued him deeply. One of his colleagues writes that he was a mentor and a friend who was happy to advise and listen about anything from family to educational aspirations. He was seen as a wise person who guided others to success.

He was a wonderful cook, making fish and chicken curry that nearly caused riots in the lunchroom at work. When visitors came to his house, he always had their favorite dishes prepared.

Victor’s dream was to become a pastor. Although it was not realized, he ministered to people in many ways throughout his life. Above all, he was a man of prayer, a man who knew the Bible well, and who loved God.

He spent the day before he passed with his loved ones. During lunch with his daughter, he remarked, “I’m ready to see Jesus.” Later that day, despite feeling tired, he insisted on visiting his beloved wife, and spent the evening with his son. This last day is a perfect reflection of his adoration of his children and his never ending love affair with his wife. His unexpected passing leaves a hole in the lives of countless people, from India to Loma Linda, who will miss his guidance and his booming, infectious laughter.

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Victor Bathini – Dad

I'd like to thank everyone who are present here to support our family during this time of our loss.

I want to acknowledge the family members who came from out of state and the country. My Dad's sister’s family, Mr. & Mrs. Samuel & Sampurna Kanagaraj and their two son's Kenneth and Kingsly from Toronto, Canada. My cousin Kelvin and family were unfortunately unable to be here. My Dad's other sister’s family, Mr. & Mrs. Amos & Swarna Lam and their three children, Sruti, Alan and Sam from Houston, Texas. Mr. & Mrs. Samuel Pushparaj from Maryland. My dad’s brother-in-law Pr. N D Samson was unable to be here and we miss him. My cousin's family, Mr. & Mrs. Prashant & Supriya Pilli and their two children Preanch & Praneesha from Port Saint Lucie in Florida. Mr. Ilapogu Devadas from Canada. Thank you for being here and for your love and support. I apologize if I missed anyone else.

I would like to thank my Aunt Louisa who stands as a strong pillar in our family. Thank you for being there when we had to share the news to Mom. Your presence made it a bit easier to do it. Linda acca and family thanks for making the time to visit mom and for taking Aunty Louisa to see her on several occasions. Seli aunty thanks for coming through as a support for mom during this time. Please continue to be there for her. I also want to thank the rest of the Dawson family for their care and concern and for reaching out to us via phone and text.

Thank you to the extended family of my brother in law Carlos for coming and joining us during this time. I appreciate your support.

I want to thank Pr. Sam, his family and all the group members of the Southern Asia Adventist Community Church. The list is long but to everyone thanks for your care, concern, love, support, calls, visits, flowers and the food. Thanks to Bobby Thomas and family for coming all the way from Arizona to be here for us. Special thanks to my buddy Alvin Kelly for being there for me on a level only he and I would understand, to his wife Sherin for being there for Ruby and their boy Ethan for being there for Rianna. Thank you to my friend and whom I consider my little brother Sunil. He's always been there to help us out in whatever way we ask him to. My youngest daughter, Kaitlyn adores him.

I like to thank everyone from Peppermint Ridge who worked with my Dad. I'd like to also thank Vincet and Janet who Dad consulted for. I'd like to thank the Fontana SDA Church members for their loving support.

Thanks to everyone who has participated in today's Memorial service. Thanks to the administration of the Campus Hill Church to let us use their Church and fellowship hall. For those of you who may not know, Sister Ellen G White spoke at this Church and Dad would have loved to have his service here. I'd like to thank Ernie and the rest of the staff at the Montecito Memorial Park and Mortuary for making this process smooth and easy.

I like to thank my wife's siblings, Laurel, Eireen and Philip for the comforting words and for checking up on me to see if I am doing OK every day. A special and heart filled thanks to my In-law's Pr & Mrs. John Prasadarao. They have cared for my Dad as he lived in my home. They spent time with him on behalf of me so I could take care of my two girls. Dad told me how much he appreciated your love toward him and so do I. Lastly I would like to thank my wife for her love, support and comfort she provided. Also I would like to thank my four year old daughter Rianna, who prayed for me every day so that Dadda would be happy and not sad. She also prayed for Jesus to raise grandpa and take him to heaven when he comes again!

These thanks are on behalf of my sister and I. There are many people who have reached out to us via email and text and we thank you all. Thanks to everyone who wrote on the online guest book. If I have missed anyone please do not be offended.

As I stand here, I see friends and relatives that have come great distances to be here for my Dad. I am humbled and quite frankly impressed at how he must have touched your lives. I can only speak for myself, but when I think of how he touched my life, the first word that comes to mind is “admiration”.

I could stand here and list all the ways I admire him…but I would like to share a few reasons why I admire my Dad. First and foremost was his love and commitment for my Mother, and not just marital commitment. He was committed to making her HAPPY. If it was important to her, it BECAME important to him. They were married for 42 years, and during his last days, his only concern was for Mom’s well being, and not his own impending mortality. Mom, Dad loved you so much and I only was able to understand how deep that love was until you two were separated recently due to your health conditions.

I also admire him because of the KIND of father he was to us (my sister and me). Yes, he loved us very much. But he also instilled in us a core value system that defined who HE was. And that was a man who kept promises. Honored commitment. He was a man of integrity.

The best compliment he gave me was that I was a better father than he was when it came to spending time with my children.

I think about the last forty years having him in my life and how lucky I am to have seen a man, especially my father, overcome extraordinary obstacles—so many times, and I admire him for that. I was wondering if it would be any less painful if dad died at a later age, after a very full and complete life. Maybe? I think part of the grief I feel is because dad was so vigorous and full of life before he got sick. His sickness robbed him of that vitality long before it took his life.

My family has lost two other family members in the past six months. My cousin Preeti from my Mom's side and my Dad's older sister Mercy atha. It’s been difficult to accept their losses, but my father’s passing is by far having the most impact on me. I’m still processing his loss and I’m shocked by all the emotions I’ve been experiencing.

I’m definitely not an expert on grief, but I do know there are many phases. I think one of the last few phases; “acceptance” becomes more challenging before the acceptance and healing become easier. It just feels surreal to me; I can’t believe he isn’t here.

I’m going to say these words to my Dad:

There will never be enough words or time to tell you how much I love you. Whether you know it or not, you have taught me so many life lessons in the past forty years. Your imperfections, your courage, your strength, your heart, your laughter, your kindness, and your, at times, stubbornness have been wonderful to examine and soak in.

You’ve taught me to work hard and not be lazy. You worked every day until you were forced to retire, but even then you didn’t stop working hard and fighting each day.

You’ve taught me to have humor. Well, I try to but I will never be able to match your wit. You always had a sense of humor and I loved how you were never that grumpy old man. Whenever you could fit a joke in, you would. You really knew how to make others smile, and your kind disposition always shined through.

You’ve taught me to always do the right thing. You had a strong moral compass. You saw the good in people. You judged people by their character and you held yourself, and us and the rest of the world to a very high standard.

I loved how you never lost your love for cooking. I will always miss your delicious fish curry. You showed me how simple it was make it yet how tasty it turned out to be but I may never be able to duplicate it and I missed a golden opportunity to spend time in the kitchen with you.

I could go on and on, but for now I will say I miss you so, very much. I'm not saying goodbye... I hope to see you again and until then, you will be part of my every day.

I close with this Poem:

We little knew that morning

God was to call your name.

In life we loved you dearly,

In death we do the same.

It broke our hearts to lose you,

You did not go alone.

For part of us went with you

The day God called you home.

You left us beautiful memories,

Your love is still our guide,

And though we cannot see you,

You are always at our side.

Our family chain is broken,

And nothing seems the same,

But as God calls us one by one,

The chain will link again.

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My father had a booming, contagious laugh. He laughed with abandon, full of life. If he was laughing somewhere, you knew Victor was coming. If I was preoccupied and he laughed, it would startle me. I don’t want to forget what a happy man he was because of his pain and suffering at the end.

He was a witty man, able to speak to the young, to people much older. He had friends in all age groups. He had friends from all over the world. At any gatherings, if a table was laughing, I knew my father was there.

When he talked to people, he always made them feel like they had all of their attention. It felt like he was looking deep into their soul. He comforted people, often with laughter. He always had a little proverb that went with every conversation. It was never so heavy to make things worse, but lighthearted enough to take the craziness out of something serious. My father never had any enemies, at work or at home.

We had such a close relationship. We both could give each other advice. He showed me that he respected what I said. He gave me the confidence to make my own decisions in life. I see myself at work, keeping his lightheartedness and laughter, problem-solving without enemies.

He worked so hard. So I tried to give him life experiences to help him enjoy the other part of life. One Fourth of July, we tried to give him the traditional American experience of a barbecue in the park. We even got him to ride a bicycle. He hadn’t ridden a bike in over ten years, and he was very happy. He rode and rode, and he kept saying we should do this more often. I was used to seeing him in a suit and tie, getting ready to go to work. It was a revelation to see my father in shorts and a blue striped shirt and sunglasses, embracing the day. He was a man who embraced what came to him, whatever it was.

When my husband first asked my father for my hand, he said no. He was worried that I hadn’t finished school, and neither had Carlos. “How will you take care of my daughter?” he said. But after we were married, he embraced my husband in every way. He told him things he didn’t tell anyone else; Carlos became his confidant.

He loved his grandchildren so much. He made sure to cook for them. His special for them was dal rice and yogurt, and he always had it when they came to visit. He always told me not to worry about Ben. He used to say, “I was always like that, so willful. And look at me now.” And he would say that Sisi would take care of Ben. “She’s very nurturing,” he would say. As he was with everyone, he was so giving with them. He was always asking me what to buy for them. He had already decided to buy Sisi a beautiful dress for her birthday. Since his passing, both Ben and Sisi have told me, “We love grandpa this much!”

In 1984, my aunt and uncle came to visit with a video camera. In the video, we children stand, skinny and stiff and nervous. But then my father walks into the room, bringing energy and joy and laughter. And in the video, as he did to the very end, my father is feeding my mother. Because above all, my father was in love with my mother. Throughout her life, he cared for her with tenderness and devotion unlike anything I’ve ever seen. He was a man of great joy, and his greatest joy was her.