My Final Message to my Mom:

As I have been reflecting over the past 5 months, as Mom's health began to take a turn for the worse, I have been thinking…thinking about many things, but thinking mainly about what a long period of time has elapsed since mom was diagnosed with “dementia” in 2006.   Given her perseverance, we really are not sure when this awful illness took over her ability to live life and caused her to give up so much. 

The initial grief of course came when Dad and all of us began to see the slow but unchangeable decline, and the utterly helpless feeling that none of us could do a thing to stop it.  Grief, when we all knew full well what would be the probable outcome.

Grief and guilt are cousins I believe, because grief often garners feelings of guilt. Guilt over not knowing what to say or do… guilt over not visiting enough… guilt over… well the possibilities are probably endless… and pointless. For who knows how to deal with this?

But, at the same time, it has been a journey for us that increased my admiration for her, as well as my understanding of her deepest character and ultimate love for her family.   None of us had a clue how long this journey would be.  Alzheimer's is truly the long slow goodbye.   With great love, my Dad cared for Mom at home until reluctantly, and only out of necessity, we placed her in a nursing home just about a year ago.  The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.   Dad faithfully assured Mom's total care and has always loved her so very deeply - his grief is surely the deepest of all.

Valerie Florence Semeraski Spring was born in Buffalo on April 13, 1933 to Valerian and Julia Semeraski.  She is the 3rd Oldest of their 4 Daughters.  On July 16, 1955, she married Frank Spring.  There were many that thought Dad had been destined to be a Bachelor forever when he married Mom in his early 30's, however, Mom swept him off his feet and their story began.  She was a loving wife, mother and nurse.  Her dream as a child was always to become a nurse.  She lived that dream embraced her profession and used her knowledge and experience to educate and care for many throughout her career.

President Lincoln, in talking about his mother once said, "All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel Mother."   Mom, no truer words could ever be spoken.  A mother and grandmother is a temporary blessing, the more you have her around, the more blessed you are. However, sometimes the more we have that fortune, the more we get used to it, we take it for granted.   Throughout the years, my Mother was always there -- to rejoice with us and when trouble would thicken around us, she was always there to help us through our tough times - assuring the care of my brother and sister when they both were very ill, and saving my sister from her own possible death on Christmas Day 1987.
  
Mom was a good person, a generous and loving person.   Gardening being one of her favorite hobbies, she loved to share her gift with others as well.   I still fondly remember watching her from the window of our then new home, admiring her repetitive diligence to fill our garden's void with perennials she cultured, and knowing how this same garden would always be such a loving and wonderful memory of her.    

Selfishly, I am truly sad for me.  My Mom is in a better place, but I will miss her. I am sad for each of us who grew so accustomed to her smile and her love.  I am sad for all of the tomorrows in which she will not be an active participant, but that sadness is tempered with the belief that we will all be together again. That she is right now with her own parents and sister, making plans for the day that they will greet each of us with a smile and a hug.

I look forward to that day, but for now will be satisfied with the many wonderful memories that I have of the most loving, caring woman that I have ever known.  I know the loss will be difficult to bear some days, so I want to close with a poem that expresses my love for her.

You didn't die just recently,
You died some time ago.
Although your body stayed a while,
And didn't really know.
So we've already said, "Goodbye",
To the person that we knew.
The person that we truly loved,
The person that was, "You".
And so, when we remember,
We'll think of all the rest.
We'll concentrate on earlier,
And remember all the best.
For in the real scheme of things,
Your illness wasn't long.
Compared to all the happiness,
You brought your whole life long.
We think of you as yesterday,
When you were fit and well.
And when we're asked about you,
It's those things that we'll tell.
And so we meet in remembrance,
Of a mind so fit and true.
We are here to pay our last respects
To say that, "We love you".

I love you Mom - Donna

Aunt Eleanor and family have nothing but loving and happy memories of Valerie.  Matthew and myself unfortunately were not able to attend her wake and funeral but our hearts were there.  What a beautiful family Valerie and Frank made through the years.

Uncle Frank, Donna, Diane and David....
    I wish I could hug you all in person and I want you all to know my thoughts and prayers are for you all.  I will always keep my memories of her in my heart and I will keep her forever in my prayers.  She has seen the light and is full of Gods everlasting Love Peace and Joy....Our bodies die but our souls live on forever and your hearts are all One....There she waits for you all one day to share in the Glory of God forever and ever.....May God Bless you and shower you with his loving care and May our Blessed Mother Mary wrapped herself in your hearts and comfort you...
Love Always...
Ray, Camille Tory and Kristi Kazmierczak

My thoughts and prayers are with Valerie and her family.

Valerie is in our thoughts and prayers.Our deepest sympathies for your loss.                                     BoB & Hedda Panek Richmond Virginia

I'll never forget watching Aunt Valerie dance the polka with her sisters at our wedding, and the obvious joy on her face. That is the how we'll remember her.  Our love, prayers and condolences go out to you and your families Uncle Frank, Donna, Diane and David.

Prayers to my Godmother.  Remembering many good times growing  up. PRAYERS FOR MY COUSINS TOO

My biggest condolences go out to the family. Wish I could be at the wake but my prayers will be with everyone and Valerie.

"How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young,compassionate with the aged,sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in your life you will have been all of these" - George Washington Carver. 
I chose this quote because of how I perceived your wife, mother and grandmother lived her life. May you all find comfort in her life well lived. The Wrazen Family : Deb, Russ, Ben, Josh and Yan

Thinking of you at this time. So sorry for your loss.

Dear Diane, Donna, Jim, and Family,
Our thoughts and prayers are with you all during this difficult time. We are so sorry we can't be with you today but you are all in our hearts! Your mom is in a better place and is no longer suffering. That should bring peace to all of you knowing this. Prayers for all of you for better days ahead. Lots of love and friendship,
The Nagurney's

Uncle Frank, Donna, Diane and David and Families.....
    My Love Ray and Camille Kazmierczak

Diane, Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this very difficult time. I truly understand what you are going through. I remember all the long talks we used to have about our mothers. Just know that your mom is finally at peace and someday you will be together again!

I am ver sorry for your loss Diane.  Prayers for you and your family.

Diane hope you know we are thinking of you during this most difficult time! We will keep you in our prayers!  Bonnie Jim & Patrick Andrzejak.

Diane, my thoughts and prayers are with you. I know how hard it is to lose your mom. But she is at peace now. Mary Cerny

God bless and guide you and yours through this most difficult time. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

Diane: I am so very sorry for your loss. Your mother was obviously a beautiful person inside and out. No person should have to go through what your mom did, but your hard work and personal sacrifice allowed your mother to have grace and dignity during her illness. Thank-you for allowing me to be part of your life.  I hope our talks were helpful. Know that I care and that I feel your pain. Your mom has earned her wings and is at peace.  Love: Sally Reed

I had the pleasure of working with Valerie in years past.  She was a delight to know and work with.  She is in my thoughts and prayers. My deepest sympathy is extended to all her family and friends.

I will always remember you, as you always remembered us. RIP

It has been a long struggle but Valerie is now with her Lord and is at peace. Valerie was blessed to have such a loving and caring family. May God's peace and comfort abide with the whole family during this time of loss. 

Kathy Atkinson

OBITUARY

Valerie F. Spring

April 13, 1933 – July 14, 2013

Wood Funeral Home

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