Myrtis Marie Hubbard

MYRTIS MARIE (HAYDEL) HUBBARD

Myrtis (Haydel) Hubbard was born on August 20, 1925 to Earl and Hilda Haydel in Wallace, Louisiana, just upriver from New Orleans. She had two brothers, Earl Haydel (1928 - 2016) and Gerald Haydel (1931 – 2005).

She grew up in the Louisiana country where her dad farmed and fished for a living. Her mom taught school but wanted Myrtis, who was nicknamed BeBe, to receive a good education so her parents sent her to the city to live with her aunts and grandmother in New Orleans. Myrtis attended Corpus Christi Catholic School through 2nd grade in New Orleans. She was too smart for kindergarten so she was placed straight into 1st grade. Myrtis was moved to Valina Jones Grammar School and then Albert Wicker High School for 8th and 9th grade. She graduated from high school at 15 years old. She attended business (secretarial) school although she really wanted to be a nurse. Wanting to see more of the United States than Louisiana, she ventured to California in 1943 with her friend Shirley Perea. They went from Los Angeles to Oakland, where Shirley stayed and Myrtis moved back to Los Angeles. A few years later, her parents and youngest brother joined her in Los Angeles. After several years she met Nathan “Nate” Hubbard (dec’d June 2005) whom she married on April 30, 1949 in Los Angeles, California. They first met at a party and with Nate’s persistence, began dating. Nate went to work in Guam to build military housing after serving in the Navy. Once he got back home to Los Angeles, they decided to build a life together.

One year after they married (1950) they had Nathan, Jr. Myrtis went back to New Orleans once on train with her infant son, Nate Jr. but that was the last time she visited as California became her home. In 1952, Dorian was born as the US was celebrating the 4th of July! Nate, Sr. continued to work in construction. Myrtis worked as a seamstress in the Los Angeles Garment District until their first girl, Caprice joined the family in the Fall of 1956. San Diego was a growing area and there was a lot of construction work there so Nate would spend weekdays working in San Diego and come home on the weekends. One Friday evening in the Spring of 1958 he returned just in time for the birth of their fourth child, Guylaine. While working in San Diego, Nate fell in love with the area, bought a piece of property in El Cajon and built the family a house, which they moved into in August of 1959. Myrtis spent her days cooking, cleaning, sewing clothes and looking after the four kids. She and Nate also became very involved helping around the church (St Kieran’s). Every night the family gathered at the kitchen table for one of Myrtis’ delicious meals and watching TV until bedtime. After attending Mass and enjoying a big breakfast on Sundays, the family would often load up in the station wagon to go for a Sunday drive. Sometimes to the local mountains, or the desert, or other San Diego attractions like the San Diego Zoo, Balboa Park, the waterfront and Sea World. Myrtis was always very welcoming and the Hubbard family had many family friends who we would visit on the weekends. Our house was “the” place to be for the annual New Year’s Eve party. By the time Nate, Jr and Dorian were in high school, Friday nights were spent at the football field for every game, plus wrestling matches in the winter. She preferred to let Nate go to the Charger football games with his buddies, but she was always right there with us for the away games watching on TV.

In addition to being a great cook and keeping the house impeccable, Myrtis sewed and was an exceptionally talented seamstress, making clothes for every member of the house (including Barbie dolls) and also for friends who would pay her. She sewed several bridesmaid dresses and a couple of wedding gowns, including Caprice’s. She was also a voracious reader, she helped the kids with homework, she loved doing crossword puzzles and jigsaw puzzles, going to the movies (with all 6 of us loaded up in the station wagon with snacks for the drive-in) and listening to music. She and Nate LOVED to dance and (probably) were the life of most parties. She loved to garden, especially tending to her beautiful rose garden. In the early 70’s, Myrtis’ father had several strokes that left him incapacitated. She would travel to Los Angeles every week to help her mom before the decision was made to move her parents to El Cajon and Grandma Hilda moved in with the family and Grandpa Earl was in a local nursing home until his death several months later. Also in the 70’s Myrtis was hired as a seamstress for a local company (Flight Suits LTD) who made fire retardant flight suits for pilots and racecar drivers…..her “claim to fame” was sewing one set for the Blue Angels. Once the girls moved away for college in 1976, Myrtis had more time on hands and in her early 50’s went to school to become a Certified Medical Assistant, fulfilling her lifelong dream of going into nursing! She worked for several years until that doctor’s office closed. With the kids out on their own. Myrtis and Nate had a little more time for heading to the Race Track in Del Mar as well as the local Casinos, enjoying road trips to visit her brother and her lifelong friend Shirley in the San Francisco Bay Area, exploring the Western U.S. and going to Vegas.

As the children were getting married and grandchildren started coming along, she was the go-to babysitter. She loved the holidays, Christmas, Thanksgiving and Easter, and for decades hosted almost all the family gatherings, sharing family recipes with the ever-expanding Hubbard family.

Myrtis was the type of person who became a “friend for life.” Her “partner in crime” girlfriend from New Orleans remained a part of her life until her death a few years ago. Her cousins were also her friends. In addition to getting invited to her children’s friend’s parties, on many occasions, she served as a confidant for those friends especially during their teen years. She was asked to be a Godmother to at least 9 people. Her best friend Lynn came into her life around 1963 and they have remained close through Lynn’s marriage, the birth of her four children (one of whom is Myrtis’ Godchild), the premature death of Lynn’s husband, the loss of her own husband and the new friends they both made while attending their grief group 15 years ago.

After 30-plus years living on Paquita Street, the Hubbards sold their home and bought a brand new home on Serenity Court. Mytis was in 7th Heaven as she had the chance to decorate it from top to bottom and turned the house into a home. Not long after moving in, her beloved Nathan had developed diabetes, plus had some other health challenges, and was eventually placed on at-home dialysis. Myrtis once again put her nursing skills to good use as his caregiver and helped with his dialysis 3X a week. On a Sunday in June she asked him what he wanted to do after attending Mass and he responded that he wanted to go to the casino. Before they left the house, he took her in his arms a planted one last kiss on her lips. As they were walking out of the casino, she was at his side when he collapsed and departed this life on earth. After Nate’s death, Myrtis continued to host most of the family gatherings, but with a little help with the cooking and eventually turning to pot luck style. The family continued to grow and spread out a bit so the Christmas celebration became Hubbard Family Christmas on the weekend before Christmas Day.

As the years went by, Myrtis had various ailments but over all remained quite healthy. At the age of 88 ago she had a heart attack….mind you, she checked her symptoms in her medical journal, called her LVN daughter-in-law (Margaret) to say “I think I’m having a heart attack” and then called 911. She required a stent and a pacemaker/defibrillator and she was back home in a few days, still living by herself and continued to enjoy all of her favorite things including trips to the casinos, going to lunch every month with “the ladies” (from the grief group), doing crossword puzzles and reading. As the years went by, bit by bit her memory started to fail and she was given the official diagnosis of Alzheimer’s at the age of 90. Myrtis was a very independent, endearingly opinionated, stubborn woman who was adamant that her wish was to never leave her home until the day she died. Well, Alzheimer’s took her down an alternate path when it became clear to her children that it was no longer safe for her to be living by herself (and she “fired” everyone who was hired to help her, especially the cleaning person who “missed spots” or the gardener that didn’t pull all the weeds), and in December 2019 she was moved to Caprice’s house. It was not long after that she no longer seemed to remember living at that house and her decline sped up. A few months later Covid hit and we were all grateful for Caprice taking on the burden of daily caregiver in the midst of a global pandemic. For over a year there were only a few visits and a few small family gatherings. Hospice was now coming a couple of times a week and the nurses, caregivers and chaplains all seemed to enjoy Myrtis’ company when snippets of her personality shown through. In June of 2021, the “big move” into Alpine View Lodge, a Memory Care Facility, happened and another transition went quite smoothly. For that move, her children were somewhat grateful for Myrtis’ failing memory loss since she was told “she was staying there for awhile.” Once again, she continued to slip away as her Alzheimer’s progressed.

On the morning of October 14, 2021 she was reunited with her beloved Nathan in God’s loving arms. Alzheimer’s forces us to say “goodbye” to our loved ones twice because Myrtis was no longer the person she used to be. She remained somewhat feisty until the end, but after 96 years….she was more than ready. Her children were able to say final goodbyes and spend time with her and with each other. They will love her forever and cherish all of the wonderful memories.

Myrtis is survived by her children, Nate, Jr (Toni), Dorian (Margaret), Caprice Sander, Guylaine (Mark) Brosmer, her grandchildren Ayric Hubbard, Melissa Hubbard, Derek (Kelly) Hubbard, Andrew Sander, Marielle and Geremy (Lara) Brosmer, as well as Brian Duenez, Tera (Anthony) Valenzuela, Robyn (Victor) Robledo, and Michele (Steve) Richardson. A total of 22 great-grandchildren and 3 great-great grandchildren. May Myrtis’ loving, beautiful spirit live on in all of them.

In lieu of flowers, please honor her memory by making a donation in Myrtis’ name to the SD Alzheimer’s Association - Quest for the Cure at https://www.alzsd.org/quest-for-the-cure

Memorial Services:

Celebration of Life on Sunday, Nov. 14 at 2:00 - 5:00pm

Singing Hills Golf Resort – Garden Room

3007 Dehesa Road, El Cajon, CA 92019

*Please contact Caprice with plans to attend: [email protected]

Memorial Mass & Repass on Saturday, Dec. 18 at 11:00am

Church of the Visitation

6561 W. 88th St., Los Angeles, CA 90045

*Please contact Guylaine with plans to attend: (310) 422-7600 or [email protected]