Melvin Mills

It is unfair to describe Mel in a few words. He was compellingly honest and intensely loyal. In his simple and quiet way, he led our family and taught us all how we should live our lives. Mel was so easy going and calm and never lost his temper. But if you made the mistake of going too far with him, you knew it. When it came to discussions of a serious matter, Mel's words were careful and few and held meaning. He was intensely appreciative when others did things for him. People loved Mel immediately and would go out of their way to do anything for him. Mel loved his country and would not stand for any criticism of it.

Mel was born in Lindsey, Oklahoma February 25, 1930. He was the youngest of 4 children, two sisters Cleta and Georgia and his brother Marlon. His parents, Walter and Vera had grown up together as childhood sweethearts. They owned a small farm and worked hard to provide for their family. In 1932 when Mel was just 2 years old, his family, with many others like them, left the great dustbowl and headed out to California. They settled in Lemore in the San Joaquin Valley and started a new life.

Vera enrolled him in 1st grade when he was 5. She needed to go to work. Mel's sisters doted on him with his dimples and big blue eyes. He was always younger than his classmates and was the tagalong to his older brother. Marlon was an outstanding athlete in school, but Vera wouldn't allow her youngest to play football for fear he would be hurt. So Mel helped out with the team as manager and water boy. He took to spending time with his cousins. They raised pigeons and hunted rabbits and generally ran a little wild.

Mel excelled at school and was ready to graduate at 15 but school officials would not allow it until he turned 16. He tried several times to join the Navy but was underage and his mother wouldn't sign the papers to allow him to join. Two weeks after his 18th birthday, he decided it was time and went down to the Hanford enlistment office to sign up. His family reluctantly watched as he headed off to basic training at the San Diego Naval Training Center.

He scored well on hi entrance tests and the Navy offered him any school he wanted; he picked radar school. He received training as a Radarman. During this time, his mother Vera passed away at a very young age. It was a shock to him, she had known she was ill but could not have shared that news with her youngest. After his training , he spent time in San Diego and Treasure Island in San Francisco. On weekend leaves, he would hitchhike to his sister's or travel somewhere with a buddy.

He was deployed on a battleship as a destroyer escort. His ship was in Japan when the North Koreans crossed the 38th parallel in South Korea. They were all called back to the ships and sent to North Korea. During the war, his ship was fired on many times as they sat off shore and bombarded enemy shore installations. But they were lucky and few from his ship were lost during the battles. His enlistment was extended while the war continued. Mel was intensely proud of his service to his country.

At 22 he was discharged from the Navy, he wanted to go to college. He took a job with the Superior Dairy in Sanford as a milk man. He got up each morning at 4am and laded his truck. His delivery route included delivering milk to houses and schools. One of the benefits of th job was enjoying a huge bowl of ice cream when he returned to the dairy after his route. He never ever got tired of strawberry ice cream.

In September of 1952 he met a girl. Marie Hardy was a junior in high school when they met while hanging out with friends. He didn't see her again until November despite his efforts to find her. They started dating and 6 weeks later he asked her to marry him. At first Marie said no, she was too young to get married and she wanted to graduate high school and go to college. Mel couldn't accept her answer and eventually told Marie that if she didn't marry him he was leaving for San Francisco. She realized then that she couldn't let him leave, she knew then he was too fine a man to lose. They got married June 14, 1952. They moved into a house two houses down from her mother an lived there while she finished high school. She finished high school in early December and he started college in January.

Mel moved his wife to the campus of Cal Ploy San Luis Obispo, an all men's college at the time. They were part of a crop of Korean War veterans and wives that lived on campus. Marie couldn't find a job and their finances were tight. Mel tutored math students for extra money. Marie got pregnant with the first child so Mel took a semester off school and worked in a grocery store. After Teresa was born, Mel returned to classes and finished in 3 years with a major in Math and a minor in Physics. He was offered jobs at three different companies and took an offer from Rocketdyne in Canoga Park. Rocketdyne had offered him the chance for overtime hours and his family needed the chance to get ahead. The week before hi graduation, Rocketdyne sent him a telegram to say they ended their overtime program. Mel then accepted a job with General Dynamics in San Diego.

Mel, Marie and Teresa moved into a house off Ketner in San Diego. Teresa followed her daddy around like a puppy and she was his golden child. People would say Teresa looked so much like Mel that her mother could have been anyone but Mel was definitely her daddy. In 1958, they bought their first house on Wheatley Street; 3 bedrooms and 2 baths for $16,200. Mel continued to work for General Dynamics as a Systems Analyst in telemetery and missile guidance. Mel was a true "Rocket Scientist". He worked on the launch systems for the Mercury program, the first manned spacecraft. When CBS news broadcast from General Dynamics during the tracking of the first orbital spacecraft, Mel served as the media liaison. During his years at Convair, he worked on many Atlas missile projects and later on the guidance systems of the Tomahawk cruise missiles.

Mel and Marie's family grew. Mel was proud to have a son Gary. Gary was a live-wire and Mel could only stand back and watch him go. Mel coached Gary's Little League teams since he had played fastpitch softball since before he got married. When Mindy was born, Mel met his match. She was the first person he couldn't convince to do anything he wanted. There were many battles of will between them. Julie was their happy surprise and became known by her daddy as "Baby Julie Honey". Mel insisted theat everyone took special care of the baby, just as his mother and sisters had done of him.

The family vacations were always spent on the road. Mel loved to drive and knew the "short cuts' and good roads to get anywhere. Marie's parents Jim and Mary joined them on some of the trips. And Mel's dad, Grandpa Dappy, was a welcomed visitor, always bringing the grandkids a treat of peanut brittle. The family traveled at first in campers and then later in motorhomes. The kids saw so many interesting sights and plenty of desert roads and beautiful golf courses along the way. There was hardly a place in the west the family didn't visit at one time or another. Time was spent a the campgrounds playing checkers and Frisbee, Mel was the best at both games.

In 1969, Mel was assigned on loan from General Dynamics to McDonnell Douglas in Long Beach. At first, Mel would spend the work week in Long Beach and return home to San Diego on the weekends. Eventually, the family moved to Huntington Beach. In Huntington Beach, Teresa went to Edison High School where Mel and Marie were actively involved as football team boosters. Mel spent some of his time playing softball and golfing with a group of Teresa's football playing friends, including her boyfriend Terry McNay.

Mel and Marie began planning their return to San Diego and looked for property to build a house. They settled on a spot in the High Valley are of Poway. In 1972 they moved to a rental home in Poway while their house was being completed. The High Valley house was on a 3 acre lot on a long driveway with a view all the way to the ocean. A pool was added and Mel enjoyed swimming laps in the pool before work in the morning. Mel spent his free time on his tractor keeping the property clear of brush and raising a large vegetable garden down below.

Sports continued to be one of Mel's loves throughout his life. In 1961, when the Chargers moved to San Diego, he was asked by a friend to work as a statistician for the team. The pay was minimal but the benefits were great and Dad loved watching the games and hanging out in the press box. He especially enjoyed working the Monday Night Football games, keeping and feeding stats to the announcer Don Meredith. In addition to the Chargers, Mel kept stats for many other football and basketball teams, including the Conquistadors and Clippers pro basketball teams and SDSU and University of San Diego college basketball and football teams. He had a weekly golf column in a Lemon Grove newspaper, for which he was given a press pass, allowing him free entrance to many local sporting events,including high school sports. All four of his kids graduated from Poway High School and he attended many high school football, basketball, and baseball games there. He loved the Padres and watched or listened to nearly every game.

Life was good and Mel and Marie enjoyed watching their kids grow. The girls were in cheerleading and Mel and Marie were active in Poway Pop Warner. Few things changed as the family benefiitted from the safe home Mel provided. Mel was known as the world's greatest bargain hunter. He became the negotiator whenever anyone bought a car, he would outlast even the toughest car salesman. He loved puttering around the swap meet, looking through boxes of junk for something good he could use somewhere. He did the grocery shopping, sometimes even extending the service to their daughters once they had their own homes. He would drive 10 miles to save a few cents on a gallon of gasoline. He loved finding a great deal, and would sometimes take the deal weather he needed it or not. It was a matter of principle for him. But never was the family left without something they needed. Mel always provided well for his family.

Teresa had graduated high school and was living and working on her own when she met Henry. Four days after their first date, Teresa brought her tall, mustached Mexican man home to meet her parents. Henry came to ask Mel to marry his daughter. Later Mel would say that at that moment he knew that he was the only man in the world that Henry was ever afraid of. All eyes were filled with tears when Mel walked Teresa down the aisle. Teresa and Henry left for New Jersey a few days later. For Mel and Marie, that meant the first of many cross country trips in their motorhome to visit them. It was a tradition that continued for years as Teresa and Henry moved from back east to Alameda, San Diego and then back again to New York, Virginia and finally Maryland. Henry and Teresa would have three children, Mel and Marie's grandchildren Gabriel, Christopher and Nicholas. Gabriel and Merrial would have Mel's first great-grandchild Sage.

In 1988 Mel retired early from General Dynamics after working there for 31 years. It was a day he was ready for and they started their travels around the country, visiting almost every state, including Alaska and the Yukon. Mel started writing his own computer programs when the first personal computers came out. He wrote a program to calculate and printout the stats for the Chargers so he didn't have to do it by hand anymore. He also wrote programs for other small businesses to assist in their invoicing and record keeping.

When Jerry and Mindy got married, Mel inherited two granddaughters, Jocelyn and Rachel. Jerry and Mel found a love of sports and projects together. They were definitely different in the way they went about getting the job done, but they developed a respect for each other that was lasting. Jerry and Mindy had two more children together, Mel and Marie's grandchildren, JJ and Megan. Rachel and Anthony would have a great-grandson Vincent and Jocelyn and Joe would have a great-grandson Michael.

Eventually Mel and Marie decided to leave the High Valley house and moved to a house on the golf course in Fallbrook. Mel worked as a marshall on a couple of the courses. He would spend time on the golf course collecting lost golf balls. His grandkids would come over and setup a lemonade stand on the edge of the course and sell back the golf balls. Mel and Marie loved the Fallbrook house, but it was too far from Poway where they wanted to attend the grandkids' school functions, Rachel's dance recitals, Jocelyn's piano recitals, JJ's little league games. So they bought a house in Escondido and moved closer. In Fallbrook and Escondido, Mel was able to continue the gardening he had done in High Valley. He would clear away the useless landscaping and plant his valuable vegetables.

Mel and Marie were living in Escondido at the 10th Avenue house when Julie came out to talk to them about a decision she wanted to make. She would be adopting two boys from foster care and needed her parents help to do it. As Mel had always done for all his kids, their spouses and grandkids, He stood by Julie and his new grandsons Alex and Herman. Mel was extremely loyal to all his grandkids. The boys learned the benefits of having the support of the family that Mel and Marie brought. When Julie left Escondido to live with Teresa in Maryland, Mel and Marie were able to move into their home on Huckleberry in Escondido. Mel undertook another set of projects to get the house setup just as Marie wanted it.

Mel passed away at home while napping in his chair after watching the Padres game. The Padres had come back in the 9th inning to win the game.

Mel and Marie were married for 58 years. Marie was lucky to get a good man, the best man.