Mr. Philip Hernandez
November 10, 1971 – November 1, 2012
Philip Martin Hernandez was born on November 10, 1971 at Doctors Hospital in San Diego, California and passed away on November 1, 2012 in San Diego at the age of 40. Philip is survived by his mother, Bernadette Joy Gonzales, father, Felipe Hernandez, daughter Vanesa Hernandez, brother, Rudy Alexander Hernandez, and sister Christina Elizabeth Gutierrez. He is also survived by his Grandmother, Grandfather, Aunts, Uncles and cousins.
Philip graduated from Chula Vista high school in 1990. He then served 4 years in the U.S. army from 1990 to 1994. Philip became a volunteer firefighter with Riverside County Fire Department, where in 2002 he was hired as a paid firefighter with California Department of Forestry/Riverside Ranger Unit from 2002 to 2012. He proudly served for 10 years throughout different Communities within Riverside County. Philip was a great son, a loving father to his daughter and a caring brother. He was a kind and dependable man who loved his family and always had a great sense of humor. Philip has moved on to a better place but continues to live in our hearts and memories. He will be missed by all but forgotten by none.
Philip will be laid to rest on November 29, 2012 at Miramar National Cemetery.
If you would like to send flowers, please call 1-877-894-0431, use family code 31525 or click on the FTD link to the right of the obituary.
- Visitation Tuesday, November 13, 2012
- Service Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Mr. Philip Hernandez
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April 10, 2018
I have called a few times and left messages as I always think about you and hope you are ok. I miss the times spent with you when we worked together and hope you and I can get together again some day and get caught up on everything going on in our lives. Glad I found you here sending special love to your son. Just want you to know I love you Bernie and miss you!
God bless you!
April 9, 2018
First of all, I want you to know that I miss you everyday... Not one day goes by that you are not on my mind... I went yesterday to take you some flowers to your gravesite... I always want your gravesite to have flowers ... Rudy, Christina and Vanesa are doing fine. Just missing you...The day you left us unexpected, all our lives were turned inside out... I can only speak for me... 2017 was a better year for me since your passing... I am no longer in that dark place... I have learned now to go on with my life without you... The day I loss you, my life changed and I will never be the same...
Today I know you would want me to go on with life which that is what I am doing.... I know you are surrounded by so many people in heaven that loved you, like Nana, Manuel, Stella, your Nana Cotita and you Nina, Becky.... Continue to watch over me and be my guardian angel... I have not dreamt you lately... Please come to me in my dreams....I love you yesterday, today , tomorrow and forevermore..... Mom
January 12, 2018
It been awhile since I have been back at this site but the holidays are always so difficult for me, especially your birthdate, Thanksgiving and Christmas.... This Christmas I did not put up a Christmas tree because I just was not in the mood... I have been just taking it easy, taking care of my health issues... Going back and forth with doctors... Sometimes I just feel like not going to see anymore doctors because doctors are not GOD and GOD has the last say so not MAN... I have lost so my confidence in the medical field since the passing of Stella and Nana...
Other than that, I went a bought your own Christmas reef for your gravesite... Last year they threw your Christmas reef and I was so upset I was crying because I felt like they violated something personal to me and that was your reef but I made sure this year I went to pick up your reef before the same thing happen again.
I have not been to visit you since January 2nd because I have been really sick with influenza... I have been home and have not gone anywhere for 10 days... I have been stuck at home, resting, sleeping, resting and sleeping... I am so tired of being home sick but today, I am feeling for the first time better.
I just had an urge to come to this site and share my thoughts with you... I know mijo that you are always in my heart mind and around me.... Continue to guide me, stay near to me and continuing being my guardian angel...
A Mother's Love is infinite.... Never ending.... That is my love to you my dear son...
Mom misses and loves you.....
November 1, 2017
Today marks exactly 5 years you left me.... Its really hard during these times for me because I remember what this day meant to me 5 years ago when I received the terrible news you had been killed... At the beginning I was going crazy trying to figure out what happen to you and why... I was in a really bad dark place at the beginning of your passing but today mijo, I have accepted that I will never know why this happen to you... It is only by the grace of GOD that I am still in my right mind and here because I did not want to be here anymore in this world but after the change in my heart I knew deep inside that you would want me to continue to live... I still have my bad and good days but not as often... I just miss you so much... No one can or will know the pain I feel unless they have loss a daughter or son... Part of me died inside when you left... Today I hold onto all the memories I have of you... You were a great son, brother, father and just a great man... I know that you are with GOD... GOD told me so... and you are also with your nana, Tia Stella and Tio Manuel... You are with family...
Just know that I will never ever forget you as long as I have breath. I will be going later today by myself to the cemetery to take you flowers and just sit there with you.... I love you my precious son.....
August 11, 2017
Life is not or will ever to the same without you... Today, I really try hard to remember the good times and not focus so much on the bad.... It will never get easy for me.... I am learning how to live each day without you.... I still have my good and not so good days.... I just miss you so much.... Everyone is fine... Vanesa is doing fine also.... She is working right now for the summer but will return back to finish up her internship.... She will be graduating from Fashion Design school sometime in February or March 2018.... I will be going to Greece.... As for me, I am still struggling with certain health issues.... Sometimes I just get so tired of always dealing with one thing after another with my health.... Sometimes I want to give up but then I think of Rudy, Christina and Vanesa.... I still need to be around for them...
Please continue to watch over us and be my guardian angel....and protect me.... I know you are with me.... You may not be here physically but I carry you in my mind, heart and spirit...
I love you my beloved son.....
June 16, 2017
Life has its way of showing me what I need to be grateful for in my life even though you are not here... The breathe of life, the breath I breathe, Rudy, Christina and your daughter, Vanesa... These are my reasons to go on even when I want to give up.... I have had many of those where I just wanted to give up and stop fighting... Today, I am no longer in that dark place that I was for awhile after your passing... Today, I am in a better place... GOD has been my source of help when I need strength to go on... GOD is my everything.... I spend at least 30 minutes everyday in mediation with GOD....
How I miss your sense of humor... Our long conversations, your touch on my neck, your kiss on my cheek, your beautiful smile... I can close my eyes and see you smiling.... I bet all the angels around you just love your smile... Everyday I think of you no matter what is going on in my life you are thought of daily... I still take you flowers to your resting place to make sure you always have flowers.
I just miss you and how I wish I could turn the clock back so you could be here with us.... I look forward to seeing you someday again....
You are surrounded with beauty, peace, serenity, love... No more pain, suffering or depression... Just the good things of GOD... Always know that I will never every forget you as long as I can breath.... Still going through some health issues but I have given all that to GOD... GOD has the last say-so, not man... Man thinks he does but GOD is the ultimate healer.... I love you mijo...
March 30, 2017
Philip Just want to say I miss you much ,still hard to swallow that your gone but I know your always watching over us , Anika is doing so good she is going to graduate next year and she is going to Loma Linda University to become a ultrasound tech, she misses her Uncle Phil so much,we all miss you !!!! I pray every morning and night for the family I love Phil miss you so much bro
March 29, 2017
Hello my son:
I miss you so much.... Its been a little over 4 years but time does not get any easier.... I will never get over your death... Part of me left with you when you were taken so unexpected... Some days are good and others are not so good... Life for me, Rudy, Christina, Vanesa are not the same... We all miss you tremendously... So many good things have happen to Rudy and Christina.... Rudy got promoted to Fire Captain and Christina is now going to culinary school and working part-time at a resort in Fallbrook.... They are both doing great... They tell me at times they wish you were here to see it all but I encourage them that you may not be here physically with us but spiritually you are and see everything.... I know in my heart that you are with me mijo... I feel you especially when I am sad and depressed... I still go visit and take you flowers to the cemetery each week... I just want your grave site to always have flowers and never be bare without flowers....Vanesa is also doing good... She will be finishing in June 2017 from Fashion Design School in Greece but she needs to do a 6 month internship before she actually graduates.... I believe she will graduate sometime in November of December of 2017.... As for me, I am still struggling with health issues but you already know what I am dealing with... I have much faith and trust GOD in all areas of my life.... I love and miss you my son.....
January 31, 2017
First of all I want to tell you I miss you everyday.... It has been 4 years that I put you to rest... It does not get earlier... I am just barely learning how to go on with life without you... Everywhere I go there are memories of you... I have so many pictures of you everywhere in the house... For me, I need to see and remember you everyday... You are so missed by Rudy, Christina Vanesa... Vanesa is doing great... She will be graduating from school the end of this year I believe and will pursue her career in Fashion Design in Europe... Vanesa has grown up into a beautiful young lady... Your sister is also doing really good... She got married and is very happy... Rudy is doing great and so is Melina... They just got back from Hawaii... Since Rudy's promotion to Fire Captain he is so busy,I barely see him... Other then that all so find with family... I am still dealing with my health issues but you already know what I am going through... I know you are with me all the time... I feel your presence and you always send me some kind of message that you are near me and I appreciate it very much...
You may be gone physically from us but the memories we have of you will always live in our minds and hearts... Watch over me all the time my son... Part of me is with you... When you left part of me left also... I love you yesterday, today, tomorrow and forevermore.... Mom
November 16, 2016
This is Philip's mother. Philip is buried at Miramar National Cemetery in San Diego, CA. Address is: 5795 Nobel Dr, San Diego, CA 92122.
November 7, 2016
First of all I love and miss you so much... It was your 4th year anniversary of your passing on November 1st.... The worst day of my life and the day my life changed forever.... I wanted to let you know I had my first surgery and I am scheduled for the second part on November 8th... I just want this to go away... Hopefully everything will turn out the way it is suppose to... I am hopeful... You birthday is also coming up... November 10th at 5: 58 a.m. you will be celebrating 45 years in heaven... I know you send me signs to let me know you are with me... I feel you, I sense you around me... I close my eyes and I can see your beautiful smile... How I miss you mijo... Our lives are not the same... I am barely learning how to take one day at a time without you and no longer allow myself to go back to that dark place I was for awhile... Not wanting to come back but you brought me back to my senses... Today, I just trust GOD in all areas of my life to do whatever it maybe.... Always know that as long as I am here, I will never ever stop going to visit you at your resting place... Though it is sad for me there, I find comfort and peace when I am there because I feel close to you... Mom
November 5, 2016
I have been reading your messages to your son. I noticed that you wrote that you are the only one who visits Philip. He was a dear friend to me while we were at station 35. Please tell me where he is and I will happily go spend some time with him. Again, I am so sorry for your loss.
October 6, 2016
Hello old friend. I was thinking about you last night, and then on my way to work this morning LL Cool J was on the radio...and then my first client this morning was named Philip. Not sure if any of that actually means you were sending me signs...but it's a nice thought. I love you friend...always.
September 27, 2016
A lot going on but I wanted to take the time and pour my heart to you... First of all, I miss you so much it hurts when I think of your pasaing... I go often to take you flowers and I probably the only one that goes to visit you often but that's ok because I will always be there to visit you... I am making some plans... I went ahead and purchased a plot where nana is buried for me with 2 rights... I have decided that I am going to have your ashes buried with me when it is my turn to go... So I am doing the footwork now to have your ashes removed from where you are buried now. They will give me your ashes and I will do what I have decided to do... I want you buried with me... I do not want you all by yourself once I am gone... I want you with me... I am not doing so well with my health but you already know what is going on with me... I will have surgery soon... I am leaving everything in GOD's hands... I have all my paperwork ready just in case.... You are coming up on another year gone... November 1st is always and will continue to be the worst day of my life.... Thank you for the signs you give me to let me know you are with me... I love you my son.... No one could ever love you how I do.... Mom
July 25, 2016
I have been back since June 29th from my vacation with Vanesa... She is staying taking turns staying with me, Christina and Rudy... Rudy and Melina took her camping... She really enjoyed that... Christina took Vanesa to Las Vegas for her belated birthday and other places... She is having a good time... She will be going home August 1st... With that said, there are still many days I cannot believe you are gone... I know you are but sometimes in get into denial... I really try to enjoy life, smile, be happy but deep inside I am so sad for your loss... Nothing can ever take the pain I have in my heart.... A mother's love has no limits.... Just know you are in my thoughts everyday... I love you my precious son.... Mom
May 31, 2016
Hello Mijo: I have not gone to visit you or gone yesterday to the cemetery for Memorial Day because I am in Greece right now visiting your daughter.... She has grown up to be a beautiful young lady.... She turned 21 on April 12th.... I will be here till the end of June and then Vanesa is coming to US with me for a month.... She will be staying between my home, Christina and Rudy's.... Being here in Greece brings back memories when we both went to Greece together.... Remember we also went to London.... Your loss has not gotten any better for me.... I will always grieve for you until GOD calls me.... As soon as I get back home Mijo, I will go visit you at the cemetery.... Still dealing with my health issues but just staying optimistic.... How I miss nana so much... Nana has been gone 3 months.... I miss my mom so much..... And also I miss Stella.... First you went, then Manuel, then Stella and then nana.... So much loss in the last 3 years.... I know you are surrounded by your loved ones gone..... Both your nana's, are with you now.... I love and miss you so much.... We all miss you tremendously.... You left too soon... Always know you are always in my heart and mind.... I hold onto all my memories I have of us..... Mom
May 25, 2016
What up Brother..
Just checking in with you and letting you know that you are a Great Uncle. My Daughter, Aliana, had a Beautiful Little girl. Can you Believe it. I am a Grandpa. ha ha . Your Great Niece is named Zuly and she is Beautiful. She has Blue eyes. Just wanted you to know. I just signed up Aliyah, my youngest for Private School and she will start Junior High in the fall at Ocean View Christian Academy. All the girls miss you as do I brother.
I went and watched the fight at Rudy's pad in April and Celebrated his Birthday with him as well. He is doing well. So Very Proud to call you guys my Brothers.
Anyways, Love you man and Miss you dearly. Keep your eye on me and my Children. We Love you Phil.
Your Little Brother.
May 6, 2016
Morning mijo: How I wish I could just hold you in my arms, hug you, kiss you on your cheeks... It is little over 3 years you have been gone and I am barely just learning to live life without you... That does not mean it is easy because I still have my bad days where I do not want to be around anyone and no one wants to be around me... I prefer to grief by myself... The privacy to cry, yell or do whatever I need to do... I am still dealing with health issues but I am trusting GOD for the outcome... I will be leaving in a few weeks to Greece to go spend time with your daughter... I am looking so forward to just getting away from everything and everyone... I just want to spend quality time with Vanesa... We plan to travel to a few countries in Europe.... So I am getting excited.... Rudy is doing well but I know he misses you tremendously... Your sister, Christina got married and is doing well.... She also misses you tremendously... We are miss you mijo... You left us too soon... but you continue to live in our hearts and memories we have of you....
Always know you are and will never be forgotten... Love you my precious son, Mom....
April 9, 2016
Morning mijo: It does not get any easier for me.... You have been gone a little over 3 years and the pain is still there are will always be there... I will grieve for you for the rest of my life... Yes, I am in a better place spiritually but my heart is still broken... Grieving is a process and for me I rather to by myself grieve... I finally moved to my new place... I had to move out of where I was living because there were to many memories of nana and Tia Stella... Where I live now, I feel peace of mind... By the way mijo, I am leaving next month to Greece to go see Vanesa... Vanesa is doing great... Going the Fashion Design school in Greece... Vanesa will accomplish her dream of becoming a Fashion Designer someday... Well, now that nana is with you I am more at peace knowing your nana is with you... Continue to watch over me, Vanesa, Rudy and Christina... I know you are my guardian Angel.... Going to the cemetery tomorrow to take you some flowers.... Not one days goes by that I do not think of you... I close my eyes and can visualize your beautiful smile... How I miss you mijo... I hold onto all the memories... My life will never to the same.... Until we meet again, I love you mijo.... Always remember that.... Mom
March 2, 2016
Hello Mijo: So much has happen in our lives. I know nana is up there with you... I had the privilege to spend quality time with nana from the beginning to the end.... I was there with nana when she closed her eyes never to open them again... Though, I am heart-broken and sad, I am grateful nana is no longer suffering, going back and forth from nursing homes to hospitals... I was blessed to have nana living with me for 5 months.... I have so many precious memories I will cherish forever in my mind and heart.... This is the second hardest thing I have had to walk through... First your passing and now nana... I have no regrets.... I was there for nana until the end... and will cherish the last moments I spend with nana before she closed her eyes... I know you are smiling and happy that your nana is with you... Take care of nana as I know you will and give her a big hug and kiss from me... Tell nana to be my Guardian Angel... As I know you are also are my Guardian Angel.... I miss you each and every day mijo but now you have your nana with you in Paradise....
December 26, 2015
Merry Christmas to you Mijo in heaven with your Tia Stella and Tio Manuel.... These are difficult days for us.... The holidays are not the same.... I spend Christmas with nana at the hospital... Nana is doing better.... I talked to Vanesa today.... She is doing good and is going to Fashion Design School in Greece.... Not t one Today, I celebrate 20 years of continuous clean time of no matter what's..... It has been a roller coaster ride for me walking through all I have been through in these years.... And still going through things in my life.... I look back when I first came into NA not knowing what to expect.... All I knew was that I was tired of living the life I lived for so many years.... I thank GOD first, the program of NA, my family and all the women and men that were in the rooms that gave me hope that I also could do this thing call "recovery"..... Never have I forgotten where I came from regardless of how long I have been clean.... It is very important to me....
Also today is two (2) years I buried my oldest son, Philip.... At first I was upset and angry because I could not understand why of all days my son was buried on my NA birthday..... It took me around 1 1/2 year to understand the meaning behind this.... GOD showed me why.... I am grateful that even though my son was buried on this day, it is twice as special and has a special meaning...day goes by that I do not think of you..l. I hold onto all my memories I have of you in my mind, heart, pictures and cards.... I am dealing with some health issues but I will continue to trust GOD.... I know your are my guardian angel watching over me.... I need to stay optimistic through this process.... Honestly I am tired of being strong and fighting that there are times I just want to give up but that would be the easy way out.... I am not going to allow this obstacle to beat me.... I will fight not just for me but for Rudy, Christina and Vanesa... They are the only reason why I do not give up..... I know you are with family now.... Your favorite Tia Stella and Tio Manuel.... What better company could you ask for.... Give them a big hug from me and I send you a big hug and kiss Mijo.... Loving you forever..... Mom
November 21, 2015
This last month has been pretty difficult.... First with the passing of your Tia Stella who passed away exactly one month today, October 20th.... We did not know she was as sick as she was... Stella had stage 4 cancer but never told us how sick she really was.... I had the privilege of spending quality time with my baby sister before she went to be with the LORD.... Then it was 3 years of your passing Nov. 1st..... Then your sister got married November 6th, then your birthday Nov. 10th... So it has been a roller coaster ride for me emotionally and spiritually. I just miss Stella so much... I miss our talks, texts and will miss her going up with me to see nana.... I just miss her but know she is up there with you, Manuel, Uncle Joe, Becky... I bet it is so beautiful up there... No more years, pain, heartaches..... Life just is not fair... Because you went too soon... We still had so many things to do... Your daughter, Vanesa is going to a fashion design school in Thessonalisk..... She is doing fine.... I will probably go after the first of the year to Greece.... I miss you so much.... My heart still and will ache for you until my last breath.... I love you my precious son.... Mom
November 12, 2015
What's up Brother. Missed you Yesterday, as well as the day Before. Went to visit you in Mira Mar on Halloween and placed some flowers brother. Had My Youngest Daughter and wife with me. Aliyah, my 12 year old asked me to tell her some stories about you when we were younger and it choked me up. Look forward to seeing you again when I get there. Love you Man. I know that you are in a better place and have no more torment and pain so that comforts me. God Bless your mom, Rudy, and Christina. I know that if I was hurting over the past couple of days they were as well.
Love you Phil.
Your Little Brother
September 25, 2015
I have really been going through a lot of feelings and emotions... So much is going on.... Your sister is moving out October 1st and is getting married November 6th.... I know because Christina is leaving is one of the reasons I am sad and happy at the same time... but the main reason I know I am feeling this way is because next month October is a very difficult month for me... Brings back too many terrible memories of you in your last days on earth... I remember when you found out I had cancer you hit your hand against the wall and you started to cry... I told you, mijo do not cry, I will be alright and a few weeks later you were gone.... I really try not to think about the bad things that happen to you in your last days... I really try to focus on the good times, memories we had together but like I said next month is going to be hard.... I wish I could just sleep through the whole month of October.... I know in my heart you were at Rudy's ceremony of his promotion to Captain with the SDFD.... I know you were looking down smiling down at your brother... It was a good day but at the same time I know he was thinking how he wished you would have been there....Words can never tell you how much I miss you and wish you were still here with us.... We miss you so much.... Your family.... Me, Rudy, Christina, Vanesa, Melina, Nana, Vasi... My life has changed tremendously and will never be the same every again.... All I know is I lost part of me when you left..... I love you my son always.... until the last breathe I breath.....Mom
August 20, 2015
Morning mijo: I am not doing too good ... A lot of health issues but I am taking one day at a time.... At times, I just want to give up and not do what I need to do but I still have Rudy, Christina and Vanesa..... Nana has not been doing good either... She has been in and out of the hospital since the end of September of last year.... Nana is tired and I know wants to go and be with the Lord but GOD has not called nana yet... Life is pretty hard right now with what is going on with me, nana, your aunt Stella being diagnosed with an illness again... I know you know exactly what is going on but I needed to say this... I continue to trust GOD for whatever is ahead for me... All I ask GOD is that he do whatever is his will in my life.... Your sister is doing fine and Rudy is also doing fine... He is really busy right now... He got promoted to Captain now... He always tells me how he wish you were here with him but I tell him you may not be here in person but you are in spirit... I have feel you, I sense you near me... You send me messages all the time that you are with me... You are my guardian angel.... Vanesa is also doing well... She starts school in September... She will be studying Fashion Designer... So other then that, I miss you tremendously... People say that the pain gets earlier as time passes but that is not true for me... Part of me died inside and my desires I loved to do before are no longer important to me.... My whole life was changed when you left.... I hold onto all the memories, pictures, cards I have of you and from you that I will cherish until my last breathe.
June 13, 2015
Hi mijo: Today is one of those days when I did not want to wake up... I am tired of being strong... I hurt so much inside that no one really knows my pain but GOD... I talk to GOD... I cry to GOD... He is my only comfort... No words bring me comfort...Only GOD... People tell me that life will get easier and I tell them not for me... My life will never be the same ever again... My only hope is that I will see you someday again... I love you and miss you so much.... Mom
May 21, 2015
Life has or will never be the same without you.... There is no time limit on grieving... Grieving is a process.... Everyone grieves different... I have my good and bad days... I still do the same things, I have been doing since your death.... I still light you a candle everyday, go to the cemetery and spend quality time there with you... When I am there I feel so contend and peaceful, exactly where I want to be... On my bad days, I just do not want to be around anyone... Those are the days I want to be by myself... I just miss you so much... I miss you, your beautiful smile, hugs, kisses and jokes.... You could make me laugh when I was always feeling down... I went to a spiritual retreat and this lady who did not know anything about me said to me "can I pray for you"... I said of course... She started praying and said the LORD had a message for me... The messages was: that you are with the LORD since your death; the LORD has seen all my tears; that YOU want me to stop crying that you are okay; the LORD said that you were his son first and that I had you as my son for only a season and that I need to let go of you.... I just broke down and starting crying because I knew in my heart that this message was from GOD... All I can say is that I still cry for you and that I will never stop thinking and loving you.... Mom
April 27, 2015
I know it's been a long time since I spoken to you...I know that your presence is here with us somehow/someway....I want you to know that we miss you very much. That sometimes I wonder what life would be like with you still here. I know that you can see us and know the struggles that your mom and brother,sister and daughter face.....it just seems lie, ever since up you've been gone life changed. I know Rudy misses you and I know your absence has changed him....he needs you more then ever . Anyways , we love and miss you very much. Your sister in law ..meli
March 6, 2015
Morning mijo: Lately I have been thinking and missing you so much..... How I wish I could just turn the hands of time back.... It still is and will never be the same without you.... I am just learning how to live life and go on another day without you.... I have not dreamnt you in awhile..... I have this musical Angel put away and I brought it out and put in the living room yesterday.... I said to myself for you to give me a sign you are here in the house with me with the musical Angel..... At 6:00 am this morning I heard the Musical Angel play the song.... The only way for the Angel to play the song is if someone whined up the musical Angel.... I immediately knew that was a sign you were giving me that your spirit is here with me.... I was so happy.... It brought a smile to my face.... I had confirmation you dwell here with me..... Thank you for letting me know.... I love and miss you so.... ,
February 5, 2015
Miss you Phil ??!
January 1, 2015
Hello mijo: You have been on my mind very much today.... Just thinking this will be the 3rd New Years without you... In 2013, I spend New Year in Greece with you daughter, 2014, I spend at home and I am doing the same thing for 2015... New Years is just another day for me now... 2014 was not a good year for me... All I can pray is that 2015 will be a better year...
I am up with nana... Nana has been in and out of hospitals and nursing homes since May 2014... I just got came from visiting nana to close my 2014... Nana always talks and thinks about you and there are times when nana will just start crying.. I am praying that nana will get better...
I have learned how to go on with life without you... I still have good and bad days... I cry, yell, hit my pillow, cuss when I want to... It makes me feel better... Happy New Year in Heaven... Love you mijo
January 1, 2015
December 26, 2014
Good morning mijo: Belated Merry Christmas to you in Heaven.... I put some beautiful flowers on your gravesite for Christmas.. I went yesterday as I always go but yesterday was a day I needed to be there before I spend the day with your brother, Rudy, your sister, Christina, your daughter, Vanesa and your sister-in-law, Melina... We spend the day at Rudy's and Melina's house, eating, thinking and talking about you, memories we had of you, crying and wishing you were with us... This is the third Christmas without you... I spend the first Christmas in Greece with your Vanesa and the last two have been at home... This Christmas was the first Christmas I decorated the house and put the Christmas tree up... I only did it because your daughter is with me... My Christmas' will never be the same.
I was looking at pictures when you, Rudy and Christina were small opening your gifts.... The smiles.... How I wish I could turn the clock back when all of you were small... You are tremendously missed... I hold onto all the memories I have of you... I close my eyes and I can see your smile... I miss your hugs, kisses on my cheeks and just you being around... I can now say you are in a better place.... and someday mijo, I will be with you.... Always know that though you are not here with me physically, I hold you close to my heart everyday... I love you yesterday, today and tomorrow.... Mom
December 5, 2014
Hello Mijo: I celebrated my 20 years of being clean on November 29th, the same day I buried you... You played a major role in me changing my life around.... At first I am angry and upset because I could not understand why of all days you were buried on the day I decided to get clean and change my life.... It took me almost 1 1/2 year later to understand the meaning behind this... God revealed the reason behind this... GOD always knows what is best for us.... I had a big party on November 29th to celebrate my 20 years.... I shared about how you gave me my first year token and second year token at CASA...
I was going through pictures and there were pictures way back 20, 30 even 40 years when you were a baby... My life will never be the same without you... Yes, I have Rudy, Christina and your daughter, Vanesa but you are still missed very much... Your brother Rudy had a dream about you and when he was sharing about you his eyes teared up... I am just taking one day at a time... and trusting GOD to continue to give me the strength to walk this thing they call "life"... Always know that I hold you in my heart, mind, memories, soul and spirt... God bless you my sweet son.... Love, Mom...
November 15, 2014
I have been so busy with life... My health, nana, your daughter and just life... but wanted to take the time and just tell you how much I miss you... Not one day goes by that I do not think and talk to you.... On your birthday, November 10 at approximately 5:58 a.m. you turned 43 in heaven... I know that you had your own party up in heaven with all the angels that surround you... You nina, Becky passed away November 5th and was buried November 11th... She had been battling cancer for 5 1/2 years and was no longer willing to do treatment..
Your beautiful daughter, Vanesa is here now with me.... She is going to school to learn how to speak English more fluently.... So she keeps me on my toes... She goes with me to the cemetery at times... I still go everyone other day or every two days and make sure you have fresh flowers...
Rudy, Christina do not like going to the cemetery with me and that is okay.. Everyone grieves different and for me I need and want to go there and just sit there and just take in the moment.... Love you always and forever, Mom
November 11, 2014
Your Birthday past yesterday of coarse I stopped to take a moment to wish you Happy Birthday! :) I also expressed to others that it was your Birthday Monday.
I will remember you forever & always my love, you know this. My heart is where you are. This will never change.
Thank you P., for everything to have known you was such a Gift one that I hold so close to me & will treasure always till my last breath.
*Remarkable MAN I always found you to be no one can ever come close to hold a candle to you, truly amazing you are.
Much deep Respect to you forever & always till eternity.
***HAPPY BIRTHDAY P., 11/10
Yours Truly, xxxxoooo
September 26, 2014
Hello mijo..... I was blessed this past weekend.... I went to a spiritual retreat.... And GOD gave me a message through a sister in Christ.... She started praying for me in the spirit and another sister in Christ started interpreting to me.... The message from GOD to me was that you are with GOD from the moment you departed..... That GOD has seen all my tears and has catch every tear, that you do not want me to cry anymore for you.... That you are fine and GOD also wanted me to know that you were his son first.... That GOD only blessed me with you for a season and to let you go once and for all.....
I do not know how to let go mijo of you..... I feel contentment and confirmation that you are in heaven with GOD..... I hold and carry you close to my heart..... Mom
September 14, 2014
Good morning mijo. As always my first thought is you.... I have you all over the house to see you in every room I go in... and my last thought is you.... I have dreamt you afew times but you come in other ways mijo.... There have been at least four times, I was laying on the sofa just watching TV and all of a sudden your phone number (I never deleted your number) calls me and your picture pops up... I answer the call and there is silence on the other side.... Also, I know how you loved reggae music and also the same thing, I am laying down watching TV and Pandora on my phone just starts playing songs by "Don Carlos" your favorite reggae singer... So I know that is you letting me know that you are there with me....
So much has happen in the lives of myself, your brother Rudy and sister, Christina... Our lives will never be the same anymore.... It will be almost two years you have been gone and it seems like TODAY, when I received the most terrible news about your passing... I am doing a lot better than now then before.... I still have my good and not so good days... Days I wish I would not wake up and just sleep my days away.... People ask me why I go to the cemetery as much as I do... I tell them because the love of a mother never stops.... I find peace, serenity when I am there.... I know you are not there physically but that is your resting place and I get comfort and it helps me to go on without you.... I miss your hugs, smiles and just YOU.... You brother Rudy is still having a very difficult time with your loss..... When we talk about you we both cry and ask why, what happen but as I tell Rudy we will never know....
Your daughter, Vanesa arrives October 16th, and will be staying indefinite with me.... She plans to go to school to learn how to speak English fluently and then go to Fashion Design School.... Vanesa is so big and beautiful... She is a combination of you and Vasi..... Vasi never stop loving you mijo.... Well I am gonna get ready and go buy some flowers and go to the cemetery and spent some time there with you.... As always, I love you and always know that I keep you close to my heart..... God Bless you mijo..... Mom
August 18, 2014
My Dearest Philip,
As you already know I miss you terribly every day I cope with missing you. I cry often from missing you, I cry while I'm driving to work tears just fall, I tell myself "get it together I have to go in the office"! so I try to wipe my tears. Or I wake up in the middle of the night I just open my eyes & the tears come. Last night I woke up at 2am & I told myself don't cry but tears fell. I just miss you so very much. Not a day goes by since your passing that I don't talk about you & share my memories that I know so well of you:) I always bring you up in every day conversation it seems. My heart just holds so many countless memories we shared. It brings me joy to speak about you whenever I can so I do! My way of keeping your memory alive. *I will share that I go to the cemetery very often. Sometimes I don't even get out the car, I jut tell him, I'm here P., just wanted to be near, I tell him I know you can see me. I will just sit in my car for a few, whisper to him that I miss him., then drive off....
A couple of weeks ago when I was there at the cemetery no body was there I was alone so I let go & started crying expressing how much I miss him, my head was down & I was kneeled down on my knees & when I lifted my head-- there was a Deer standing right next to me..... I gasped my heart started to pound. I thought how did I not see this animal nor hear the Deer so close to me.... I wanted to run but thought it's to late the deer was already close.... when I looked up at the deer the animal was actually looking down right at me, because I never stood up, I was frozen scared if you will, the Deer's eyes were looking right at me..... mind you I was still kneeled down.... after it stared at me it paused & then ran away. Never to harm me...... It was actually a beautiful moment. Then when the Deer ran off into the canyon it stopped looked back at me for a moment then disappeared to the canyon near by. Interesting right?
Oh P.,............. :)
I love you to much I would go to the end of the earth if it meant to bring you back or to be with you again.
Miss You ETERNITY, xxxxx BIG HUGS
August 15, 2014
Whats up Brother... Just wanted to stop by and let you know that I am thinking of you and not a day goes by that I don't pray for you, your mom, your sister, and Rudy. I miss you man. I miss seeing you and Chopping it up with you. I will see you again and I look forward to that day. Love you brother. Deko.
July 27, 2014
So much has happen since you left....... Some good and not so good...... You have been on my mind so much more today....... I miss you so much....... I miss your hugs, your kisses on my cheek or forehead, your smile and just you..... My life has changed tremendously since your death..... I am not the same person nor will I or do I want to be..... My priorities have changed not only in my personal life but in all areas of my life...... I continue to light two candles everyday since your death and will continue as well as go to the cemetery 3 to 4 times a week...... I know you are not physical there but that is your resting place..... When I go I feel content, at peace, serene and going helps me deal with your loss.... I will continue to go as long as I have life..... That is one thing that has not changed in my life..... I have dreamt you afew times and each time you are smiling with the beautiful smile of yours..... I know you have given me signs that you are with me and I thank you for that..... I carry you everyday in my thoughts and my heart..... You are always close to my heart...... I love you mijo....... Mom
May 15, 2014
Right about now on the news I hear of the firemen tackling the wild fires through certain parts of the County, Carlsbad, Rancho Santa Fe area's. I cant help but be sad and miss my dear friend even more because he was a Firefighter and one of the VERY BEST in the field/in this profession. He was a true Firefighter & took great Pride in his job that he always worked hard at. Much respect always to Philip for doing one of the most dangerous jobs there is. I Honor him Always! As I see the firemen going out to the fire hazards, I couldn't help but yell out, " that was you P."!!!! How I miss my friend so very much.... I find myself always keeping you alive by sharing stories my memories of you & the times we shared with people. I talk about you as often as I can letting everybody know that you were a Fireman & Great at it!!!! :)
*Oh how I miss you P., never will you be forgotten my mind stay's on thoughts of you every second of the day. Words can never come close to touch nor express the depth of my missing you, runs deep. Though I know you are near in Spirit your Light is Bright & Beautiful as I remember you to be, thank you for that.
*Miss You Forever P., Love You Always!
My Respect As Well To His Brother Rudy Professional Firefighter. Thank You!
May 12, 2014
This Mother's Day was the second year you were not here.... It is always one of the most difficult days for me.... I was going through all the Mother's Day cards I have from you.... It was a very emotional day for me.... I just wanted to be alone.... Not one days goes by mijo that I do not think of you... My life is not the same and will never be the way it was..... I am doing better.... I get so sick and tired of people telling me that time will heal, you are in a better place or it will get better..... I know people mean well but I really do not want to hear that bull..... It will never be the same..... For me time can and will never take the pain I have of you.... and you are not in a better place..... You should be here.... Part of me died inside.... I go on because of Rudy, Christina and your daughter, Vanesa..... I will be leaving to Greece to spend time with Vanesa on June 9th and will be returning July 31..... I will go to your favorites places in Greece..... I love you mijo.... I carry you close to my heart.....
February 16, 2014
Good morning mijo...... First of all I love and miss you very much..... I think of you all the time...... Life is not the same in my life, your daughter Vanesa, your sister Christina, your brother, Rudy...... I just take one day at a time.... I have some good days and some not so good..... Your brother Rudy is doing good.... He misses you a lot..... Your sister Christina is also doing good.... Christina is leaving March 5th to go to Greece and spend time with your daughter....... I will be going to Greece in June for Vanesa's graduation from high school.... She plans to go to design school . You remember she always wanted to be a clothing designer.... Vanesa is smart and knows what she wants..... The only place I fine comfort is going to the cemetery..... It gives me inner peace and serenity..... I have dreamt you and you come to me in other ways letting me know you are with me..... I know you are with me especially when I am having a difficult day..... The loss of you has changed my life......part of me died inside..... There are no words to express what I feel each day..... First thought when I open my eyes in the morning and close my eyes and throughout the day is you, mijo..... There is no love like the love of a mother....... Mom
December 15, 2013
I share my thoughts I need to type my words to reach out to you, so here I am again. As often as I am blessed with a new day that a rises, as the wind blows, as the sun brightens another beautiful day, ha or I get the gift to capture a Rainbow up in the sky, birds singing as I take my daily early AM walk; meaning every day life's beauty has to offer is how often I think of you, EVERY DAY I THINK OF YOU & TAKE YOU WITH ME. Every night I go to sleep before I close my eyes, I say out loud but in a suttle whisper, Good Night P., I miss you! I never forget to tell you good night.
I know you hear me P.! With every breath I think of you. You are the rapture of my mind as memories time we spent, long conversations we shared circle my being. Like a shadow you are there, ALWAYS! Everyday starts & ends with you.......... MUCH LOVE P.,
December 5, 2013
Morning: It was one year you were buried on November 29th which is also the day I turned 19 years clean..... You played an important part in me changing my life.... At first I could not understand why of all days you were buried on my clean birthday but after a year or so you showed me..... That this is the day you were buried but this is also the day my new life changed and started... I thank you mijo for always believing in me that one day I would change my life.... I still have my good and not so good days.... I started going to grieving classes which is helping a little..... My life will never ever be the same.... I miss you so much..... I have pictures of you all over the house in every room.... I need to see your pictures everyday throughout the day.... That is what keeps me going..... I hold onto the memories I hold in my mind and heart.... Not one day goes by that I do not think of you.... I go to the cemetery often and when I go I feel so much peace and serenity there..... I feel close to you...... Also thank you for the ways you let me know you are with me.....in my good and bad days but especially when I am having a hard day you always seem to let me know you are with me......Love you, Mom
November 10, 2013
Happy birthday mijo.... Today you were born at approximately 5:58 a.m. You weigh 7 lbs. 11 oz..... I will never forget the day you were born.... I have so many precious memories of you that when it gets hard and it does I hold on to those memories.... I close my eyes and I can see that beautiful smile or yours, hear you when you would call me "Mama".... I remember you would always dedicate that song by Tupuc "Dear Mama".... When I hear it I think of you and it brings tears to my eyes..... Today myself and your sister went to the cemetery and celebrated your birthday with flowers, balloons and a cake and we will sing you "Happy Birthday" this year and every year.... I miss you tremendously... Some day are good and not so good.... I just want you to know that you may not be here with me in flesh but I carry you each moment in memory and in my heart..... You will never be forgotten.... You will live on through your precious daughter, Vanesa...... who I cherish with all my heart....I love you.... Mom
November 10, 2013
I miss you so much my friend. Always.
November 10, 2013
Phil I can't express how much I miss you man,it's been a year and still it seems like a dream,I know your watching over your family and friends bro. Anika thinks about you all the time and cries for you,and I let her know that Uncle Phil is watching over her. I miss those moments when we would talk for hours at the station about our families and every day life . All I can say Phil is you are truly missed and you won't be forgotten, I lost a great friend but in the midst of it all I have come to know your loving family that you always talked so Highly of. I Miss you Bro.
November 10, 2013
November 10, 2013
November 8, 2013
Your Birthday is just around the corner November 10th, your special day. Wish You Early Happy Birthday! I have been sharing my story when I'm brave enough if you will of how I found out about your passing to a small few people. I write brave enough because I thought people wont believe me & or they will think I'm crazy. Mind you I am not for the record. Also know that when I first knew of your passing the very first thing I did was dial your last cell phone number & as the phone was ringing that night I will never forget because I kept saying out loud,"Pick Up P"., Pick Up, Come On Answer The Phone!! Let Me Just Hear Your Voice So I know Your Ok?, because I thought there is no way when I found out about your passing that it was really YOU!I told myself "no it's a different Philip". That's why I dialed your cell number that night cause I just thought you would pick up. Unfortunately there was no answer & it came up dis-connected number no longer available. Crazy because I was STILL in disbelieve & called your Fire Station that same night & when they picked up, I asked to speak to you & then asked if you were there? Unfortunately they told me no. I cannot reveal here how I found out of his passing it is very personal & I don't feel comfortable expressing how I found out because it's to complicated to write down in words. However P.,knows. May I mention when I hear the song by Diana Ross "Missing You". yea that song makes me think of you always. To his mother also if I may, even though I have never had the pleasure to meet you please know I am deeply sorry for your loss. I read your thoughts in the guest book here on line & I cant help but tear up every time for the hurt you are going through over his loss & again I send sincere apologies your way. Forgive me for I am a very spiritual person & I believe that even though visually you cannot see him, your son is always by your side in Spirit., real talk. To Rudy whom also I did not have the pleasure to meet I to am sorry for the loss of your older brother, I cant begin to imagine the loss you feel as you wrote he is your best friend, sorry also for your pain. Philip would always tell me how proud he is of his little brother Rudy, he would always tell me you make him so proud watching you do so well in life. When he talked about you to me I noticed he had the biggest smile. My respects to his Grandmother & sister Christina., to his family, to his daughter........
MISS YOU MUCH NEVER A SINGLE DAY GOES BY THAT I DONT THINK OF YOU I KEEP YOU CLOSE ALWAYS MILLION TIMES OVER & OVER I MISS YOU P., YOU STAY HEAVY IN MY THOUGHTS....... 1love
November 5, 2013
WOW Phil, I can not believe it has been a year. I miss you Brother. Miss the deep conversations we have had and the laughter we were able to share. I Pray that you are enjoying your eternal life and I know that you are in HEAVEN with the Father. Please continue to watch over all of us and please Put in a good word for us. See you when we get there. Rest in Paradise Brother. Love you. Deko... Your little brother..
November 3, 2013
November 1st was one year of your tragic death..... Not one day has gone by that I do not think of you.... I keep hanging on only because of your daughter, Vanesa, your brother, Rudy and your sister, Christina.... Life is not the same without you.... I started going to grieving classes which has helped me alittle.... I have learned that everything I am feeling is valid and I am exactly where I am suppose to be..... I have an emptiness inside of me..... Your death changed my life..... I know you want me to be happy and go on with my life but right now mijo I am not there.... I am not happy and my life is at a standstill.... I will grieve as long as I want to grieve..... All I know is that part of me is died inside.... I depend on the strength that GOD gives to me everyday because without his strength and keeping power, I do not know where I would be today..... Always know that though you are not here with me, I hold you close to my heart every moment of the day with the memories of you...... I love you my son..... Mom
September 13, 2013
I have been thinking of you more and more..... I just miss you.... Life is not the same and will never be the same for me no more.... Part of me died when you left..... Each day is a struggle for me..... Some days are better than others..... There are many times, mijo my head takes me to dangerous places.... Wanting to get revenge for what happen to you.... Some times I just have to cry, yell and not allowed myself to go there.... I miss you..... Your hugs, kisses on my cheek, your smile, your sense of humor... Just everything mijo.... All I can say is I am only hanging on because of your brother, Rudy, your sister, Christina and your daughter Vanesa.... A lot of days I just wish I would not wake up no more...... The pain of your death has changed me.... I am not the same person...... I just want you to know that I love and miss you so very much.... Time will not heal... My pain of loosing you, Philip is a pain within the pain..... Mom
July 31, 2013
You and I were as different as night and day. When we first met we had an instant spiritual connection that lead to so many years of a great friendship. I truly enjoyed our long talks and your stories of lifes wonderful journeys. I will truly miss you my friend. Thank you for always watching over me.
All My Love 2Feathers
Gail Martinez Medina
June 21, 2013
It seems as if it were yesterday when I ran into you, and our conversation sparked up like the 15 years that had passed had only been days. We were close, and I remember the day we found out we were family....crazy! You have been on my mind now for months as I have just found my family again after 30 years, and now I understand why. My heart is broken and I pray for you and your family. I know you are watching over, as you always looked out for your friends and family. You will be greatly missed. I love you Phillip.
April 25, 2013
Mijo, I miss you so much.... Not one day goes by that I do not think of you.... My heart aches for your loss.... It seems just like yesterday.... The days have not gotton any easier for me.... People tell me things will get better or that you would not want me to be sad.... I know that people mean well but unless they have loss a child they cannot imagine the pain.... When you left part of me left.... I have an emptyness within my spirit and soul.... Whenever I close my eys I can see your face, your beautiful smile, your sense of humor and just you..... I just miss you so much it hurts.... I love you my son...
January 30, 2013
Philip growing up with you has been one of the pleasure of my life. Remembering riding bikes as kids and playing football together at feaster. I have always had you in my thought to only find out about your passing. Love you bro and may God bless you
AJ TREDO AMEZCUA
January 16, 2013
IM REAL LATE WRITING THIS BUT BETTER LATE THAN NEVER. I DIDNT KNOW YOU VERY WELL, I THINK I ONLY MET YOU ONCE OR TWICE. BUT WHEN MY MOM TOLD ME WHAT HAPPENED, I BECAME QUITE SAD.YOU ARE MY UNCLE, ALONG WITH UNCLE RUDY, JARVIS AND AARON AND BY THE LOOKS OF IT, A GREAT GREAT PERSON. REST IN PEACE UNCLE PHILIP. EVERYONE WILL MISS YOU
December 29, 2012
Philip I will always keep our memories close to my heart. I am so thankful for the times we spent together. What I will miss the most is your big smile and your sense of humor. You are one of a kind and I am just so grateful to have had you in my life. I wish so much that things had turned out different, but I know I will see you again some day. Goodbye for now Love, I will always cherish our many years of friendship.
December 19, 2012
Philip, I woke up this morning with you heavy on my heart. I thank GOD for allowing me to have such a great BIG BROTHER. The wisdom you gave me and the conversations we had will forever remain with me. You were taken from us all so soon, and we all will forever miss you. Our Selfishness wants you here cause you were a great person to all of us, but we also know that you are in a beter place and we will see you again. Love you Phil. Thank you for helping me become the man that I am now. your brother.... DEKO..
December 9, 2012
My uncle Philip my best friend who died so soon I will never forget you I cry every day waiting for you to come and see me and my family but know its hard to know that I can't see you no more .I love you uncle Philip R.I.P I will never forget you voice and smile
November 30, 2012
Your home with the Angels now Phil.....Rest In Peace cuz..Keep shining down on us from above....You will never be forgotten..We Love You ~ALWAYS~
November 13, 2012
You will be remembered more than you know. I have so many memories of you from when we were little kids to when we were hanging out with our kids as grown ups. You and Vassi were there for me when I was going through some tough times and I will NEVER forget that. You were there to look out for me, more like a big brother than a cousin. You and my dad were one of the main reasons that I joined the Army, I wanted you guys to be proud of me by following in your footsteps. I love you cousin and you will always be missed. Love,
Grace De La Torre
November 13, 2012
Thank You Phil For The Impact You Made On My Son Adrian "Phil & Rudy The Hero's On The Motorcycles" Now you are in the heavens above watching over your friends & family & STILL OUR HERO. May you give us all the strength to heal. I know I will forever hold the fun memories you have left us with. Rudy, Cassie & Hernandez Familia Adrian & I send our prayers & condolences.
November 13, 2012
Mi querido Philip, it's hard to find the word to express my feelings for you! Never did I realize that with your passing, it would have such a profound effect on me like this....I thank my Godbrother Antonio Lepe for introducing Us and little did I know, our paths would cross again during a visit with your Tia Stella, my friend and neighbor at Plaza Manor..The best memories shared with Philip, Stella,and the kids...You are forever missed, loved and hold a special place in my heart...God please give Philip's family the strenght and courage to get through this difficult time... My heart and prayers goes out to you.
November 13, 2012
My Brother, my BEST friend! This has been the HARDEST thing I have ever had to deal with so far. I pray to god that tomorrow when I see you for the very last time on this earth that I will hold up and be as strong as you always taught me to be. I love you so much and I miss you so much! As I cry right now writing you this I think of all the good and bad times we had growing up. I know that GOD has called your number to become one of his soilders because he must have needed someone like you to lead and protect up in heaven just like you ALWAYS protected me and our family. I will always remember the night we were alone on New Years eve as kids and we were watching Beverly Hills Cop with Eddie Murphy and after watching that scene where he stuck a banana in the exhaust pipe. We went out and put a banana in a muffler to see if it worked. When we woke up the next morning the car was gone....LOL. So I guess it didnt work. Man what crazy and fun times we had. I know you dont believe me to this day but I PROMISE you that one day where you, lil joe, and I were chillin up on the hill in bay park drinking and I couldnt start my monte carlo. We walked all the way down the hill to your place to bring your truck to jump start my car and when we got there, I said let me try one more time......and my car started all of the sudden. You were so mad at me for making us walk down the hill all that way. You thought I was messing with you but I really wasnt. It wouldnt start, I swear! Anyways, I love you brother and I will ALWAYS think about you everyday I promise because you were my best friend! I love you big Brother and I'll miss you with all my heart!....Rudedog
November 13, 2012
In loving memory of a wonderful person. We will love you and miss you always.
November 13, 2012
Prayers for peace and healing. May we all remember the hero he really was.
November 12, 2012
philip, im not sure where to begin, i miss you homie! you were one of my best friends. from growin up in high school, till you went to the service and came home-we always kept in touch. i will always hold you dear to my heart, you were a good solid friend which will be greatly missed by me. I love you DOG!.
November 12, 2012
Philip, here it is another day and I am still heart broken that you are gone. I will never let go of all the good times we had, the memories we shared and the lessons you gave me. I started DJing cause of you, I wore Shell toe addidas because of you, and I will forever do my best to be a kind hearted man because of you. I am in pain, but comforted by the fact that you are now in a better place that we are all striving to get to. Though I know I will have good days and bad days, easy days and hard days, It will all be so much better knowing that you are smiling down on us with that smile and watching over us as you always did in life. Love you brother. DEKO
November 12, 2012
"Phil was a great person who loved his family and his friends. I meet Phil 10 years ago with those glasses of his, He was a great Fire Man we worked together, we were like brothers he was a part of my family. When ever he met people he always left a lasting impression whether it was a funny joke or his all around good nature. Phil will never be forgotten..RIP my brother my prayers are with your family.
Nina Torres Hernandez
November 12, 2012
Phil, I am still in shock i cant believe i will never see u again or hear your voice or see u drive up too my house in your motorcycle with your big beautiful smile.... We dont know & we will never know why u were taken too soon,,, & i will never forget how u would always come & bring Adrian a christmas present & leave it in my backyard & say it was from santa & then u would call the next day & ask if he liked the present.. Just know u r loved & will be missed more than u can ever know & now we are left with memories of u & your beautiful daughter lil Vanesa.... We love u Phil forever?
November 12, 2012
On behalf of Becky, Cindy & Mike we wanted to offer our love, prayers and support to all of you and the entire family during this difficult time. God is caring for Philip through the hands and hearts of others. May he now rest in peace in the comfort of "Tio Joe" and my "Tata" who loved him very much!
Wishing all of you peace to bring comfort, courage to face the days ahead and loving memories to forever hold in your hearts. Love you....Becky, Cindy & Mike
November 12, 2012
My dearest grandson Philip- Words can't express the pain I feel- I can't believe you're no longer with us- I miss you tremendously- I'm greatful that God gave me the strength that I needed to raise you into a fine young man. Philip I love you so much, you had and always will have a special bond in my heart. I know now you're in Heaven with Uncle Joe and Uncle Vicente and Nana Cotita I'm certain they were waiting for you with open arms. Until I see you again I love you forever and I miss you everyday. Nana Estella.
November 12, 2012
PH....you were always a cool, funny & brave person. I will never forget all the laughs & good times that all us cousins shared. You will never be forgotten in any which way. It's sad to see that we all have to lose you so soon. If we could only turn back the hands of time. I celebrated your 41st Birthday yesterday with your sister, bought you a cake & everything. We will keep your memory alive ALWAYS! I will miss you and your hilarious comments & jokes...good times cuz. You will also live on through your splitting image little Vanesa. It's so hard to have to say goodbye primo. I Love You PH!
November 11, 2012
The pain I feel inside I cannot explain in words the pain and loss of my first born. I can still remember the day Philip your were born.... When your dad and me bought you home the family was full of happiness to see their first grandson, nephew, cousin in our family.... I ask each day what I could have done to prevent this tragedy from happening.... All I know is I feel lost.... I miss you tremendously.... I know this will never go away.... The pain of loosing my first son.... We were suppose to grown old together.... Your were suppose to bury me.... not me bury my first born.... That is would it makes it difficult.... You went too soon from us....Each day since your passing I do not want to wake up and deal with life but I know Philip you would want me to continue doing what I need to do..... My thoughts, conversations we had your memories will live on forever..... in my mind and spirit... I miss you so much my heart hurts.... You will live on through your precious daughter Vanesa who I have always loved and cherished and with your loss now she will always be a priority in my life until the good Lord takes me home..... Always know Philip you were a wonderful human being, wonderful son, father, brother, grandson, brother-in-law, nephew, cousin and friend to all that knew you.... Your life was not in vain.... Your memories will live on forever..... God bless you my ptrcious son....
November 11, 2012
Phil was a great Firefighter but most of all he was a great friend that was all was there.
November 11, 2012
RIP, hard to believe you're not with us anymore...
November 11, 2012
Phil, I will always remember the times you, Rudy and I had riding our motorcycles. It was truly the best rides I've ever had. I'm proud to say we all reached our goals of becoming Firefighters. You will be missed greatly. My sincerest condolences to the Hernandez family.
November 11, 2012
My partner Philip. I will miss our talks which always ended up with a good laugh. God Bless!
November 11, 2012
The Phil I knew was fun to work with and was a pleasure to work with. It was fun to go through the academy with him and work in the desert with him. He will be missed.
November 11, 2012
My condolences to Phil's family... I used to see Phil when he and his crew would cover station 69, where I worked... I remembered Phil always had something funny to say...
November 11, 2012
My friend, You left us way to early. We will miss you. God be with your family in this rough time!
November 11, 2012
miss you brother. you will never be forgotten. may you rest in peace.
November 11, 2012
Phil was a good man, and a pleasure to work with. He will be missed. Our thoughts and prayers are with the Hernandez family
November 11, 2012
I Love you so much Philip and will miss you very Much! His spirit will always live on forever.You will never be forgotten always will I remember that beautiful smile you had on your face.I will always remember every time you would see me me you would always remind me how I saved your life by that one car.And I left you with that scar because of me.He would always tell me how lucky he was that day.And now you are gone but i couldnt save you this time..I wish I could of once again more that anything!!and but you are in a much better place.I will always remember that conversation we always shared and laughed about.I remember that last time I made you dinner and what you wanted to eat that night you were so happy and just in such a good place in your life full of joy and happiness and once again your smile was so beautiful I will miss that very much!!I will always remember that last time I saw you when you came to visit me at my work with little Vanessa I was so happy to see you and of course Vanessa.After that I never saw you again but thought about you often.You have so much family that love you so very much your Mother,Father and your brother and Sister and of course your daughter and the rest of your family that will Miss you dearly!May you RIP Philip and may you be the most happiest up there looking down on all of us and being our Angel..I'm not saying goodbye I just can't I will see you again one day..Just always remember that you were so adored by so many!!! I Love You!! God Bless You...
November 11, 2012
My big brother Phil. I will never forget the life lessons you taught me nor will I ever forget you. You were such a great role model to me and always there for me when I needed you. The world lost a good one when God took you home. Though we had different mothers I was blessed to share the same father with you, Rudy, Jarvis, and Arron. I will always love you and keep you in my heart and mind. I look forward to seeing you again when I make it to heaven. DEKO.